Believe Like a Child (24 page)
T
he next morning, Crystal went out for a while. When she returned early in the afternoon, she announced that she had paid the motel for another two days stay.
“Wow!” Alessa marveled, “you made 100 dollars today? I’m impressed!”
Crystal sat down on the edge of her bed. “Yeah,” she said, “thank God for horny men! I got me twenty-five bucks a guy today.”
Alessa knew that if Crystal could get twenty-five a client, she might be able to get fifty. She was relieved to get two more days at the motel. The longer they stayed, the greater the chance of Lucy recuperating and regaining her strength. Over the first thirty-six hours of their stay, the child had, in fact, become more alert and aware of her surroundings and her appetite was improving by the day.
On the third day of their stay, Alessa motioned Crystal into the bathroom while Lucy was asleep and shut the bathroom door behind them.
“Here’s the deal,” she said. “I just can’t take Lucy back to that house where we were staying. She needs to live like a normal kid. I don’t think her tiny body can take much more of this shit. I need to go out for the day and make some money. In fact, if I can make enough, I’ll extend our stay here for a couple more days until I can find somewhere for Lucy and me to go, when we leave this place.”
Crystal remembered a time when she had nurtured hopes for her own children. It was, in fact, her desire for them to live like normal kids that had finally given her the strength to entrust their care to her boyfriend’s parents. She hadn’t seen them in six years. Her own drug addiction prevented her from doing all that Alessa planned for Lucy now.
“Okay, I can stay with her while you’re out,” Crystal agreed. “But you do know what you’re doing, right? I mean, even under all that dirt, you never did look like the type of girl who would fuck someone for money.”
Alessa’s face suddenly wore a distant expression, as though a window had just slammed shut. “Things aren’t always what they seem,” she said noncommittally. “I’ve done a lot of things I’m not proud of, but at least this time, I’ll be doing it for a good reason.”
A
lessa showered and fixed herself up as best she could. She put on a pair of tight jeans she had washed in the tub the day before and a low-necked tee shirt that had belonged to her from the time she lived on Dauphin Street. Then before leaving for the day, she leaned over and gave Lucy a hug.
“I’ll be back later, Luce,” she announced. “I’m going to see if I can get some work.”
Still weak and listless from her illness, Lucy murmured, “Okay, see you later. Alessa, will you bring me some ice cream when you come back?”
“Sure, I’ll bring ice cream back for you.”
Alessa steeled herself for what might be in store, before opening the door and stepping out into the cold darkness that lay beyond the threshold. Luckily, she didn’t have to go too far to turn tricks. Several of the men noticed her standing out in the motel’s parking lot and invited her in. Others spotted her from the street when she stood out on the sidewalk, a block down from the motel. As she engaged in different sexual acts with each of the men that day, Alessa mentally distanced herself from what she was doing. Her sole aim was to get Lucy and herself off the streets. She couldn’t risk the child falling ill again and was well aware that staying in the house of squatters was neither a healthy alternative nor a safe one for either of them. There was always the threat of violence and rape.
Alessa had to compromise on her price on that first day and had given each of her customers an hour for 35 dollars. She had “done” five men and made 175 dollars. She paid for two more days at the motel and spent another 25 dollars on food which she brought back to the room. Counting the two days Crystal had paid for and the two she had just paid for herself, they could now stay four more days at the motel. In those four days, Alessa figured she could save enough money to make her next move. If she could sell herself to five men a day, she calculated, she and Lucy would be set to move on.
In the weeks that had just gone by, Alessa had talked to other homeless people she’d met on the streets. Many of them had suggested she try getting accommodations at a hostel, if she wanted to live indoors during the winter. It cost money, of course, but the cost would be minimal. Alessa had scoped out the information in a telephone book and knew there was a hostel on Spruce Street. She had called them that afternoon and made a reservation for Lucy and herself four days later.
The woman on the phone had made it clear to Alessa that it would cost her 250 dollars a month. “That’s one hundred and fifty for you and one hundred for your little sister.”
Alessa didn’t really know what to expect of the place. Nor did she care. All she knew was that young people lived there or stayed there for a while. They had showers and towels, the prospect of which thrilled her to no end. The woman cautioned her that the residents there were mainly older teens and young adults. So Alessa would have to keep her little sister with her at all times, because while they allowed children, they usually didn’t have any staying there.
Over the next four days, Alessa had sex with twenty men. She could have accommodated more, had she succeeded in finding buyers. She was determined to earn and save as much cash as possible in the short time that was available to her.
Crystal was in awe of Alessa’s stamina. On the third day, she remarked, “Girl, I ain’t never met nobody that can find people to fuck like you do.”
Alessa laughed and shared some of her experiences at Doubles with her. She confided how Harlin had forced her to have sex with the clients when she took them back for a lap dance.
Crystal listened intently. When Alessa had finished her account, she said, “Well, I guess it’s a good thing you learnt how to do all those things. You’ve made yourself a lot of money in these past few days. It doesn’t bother me none—fuckin’ for money.”
On their last day at the motel, Alessa had their checkout time extended so as to be able to hook for as long as possible before moving to the hostel. When she returned to their room that afternoon, Lucy was herself again and Crystal was lying on the bed watching television. The child had already packed their belongings and when it was time to leave, Alessa and Crystal turned to face other.
“Well, okay,” Alessa said, holding out her arms to hug Crystal.
Crystal quickly hugged them both without saying a word and moved to the door. Just before she closed it on her way out, she said, “You two take care of each other, you hear?”
Alessa and Lucy left the motel and headed to their new home. When they arrived at the Loftstel on Spruce Street in University City, they found themselves surrounded by college students. They seemed to be everywhere. But considering how close they were to the University of Pennsylvania, it was only to be expected. The hostel was a large twin home located in a neighborhood that looked no different from any other residential area. In fact, the place looked great. Far better than the apartment building in North Philly where Alessa had lived, before moving in with Harlin.
W
hen Alessa and Lucy entered the Loftstel, they were hit by a blast of warm air, a sensation they both welcomed after the chilling cold outside which was nearly unbearable. Alessa went through the formalities of checking them in. The woman at the reception told them they would be staying in Room 2B on the second floor.
The girls went up to their room, carrying the clothes they had brought with them. Once inside, they took in their new home quickly. Bunk beds were fitted along three of the four walls. Two of the beds sat with bare mattresses, the sheets folded neatly and placed at the foot, ready for their occupants. Alessa chose the top bunk for herself and left the lower one for Lucy. Lucy argued that she wanted the top bunk, but Alessa refused, fearing she’d roll over and fall out during the night. Alessa compromised by promising Lucy that she could share her top bunk with her for fifteen minutes every night before going to sleep.
Having settled in, the first thing they did was head for the common showers with the towels they had been handed and the shampoo and soap Alessa had bought from a Five and Dime store on the way to the hostel. Both girls got into the open showers and reveled in the feel of hot water on their bodies. The motel shower had certainly been better than nothing, but there was hardly any water pressure and the water never got really hot. Alessa washed Lucy’s hair before she washed her own and both scrubbed their bodies with soapy washcloths till they were done. Then they looked at each other, exhausted by their efforts and satisfied by the outcome. Alessa dressed Lucy and herself in the cleanest clothing they had and headed down to the laundry to wash all the clothes they owned.
Feeling good from the hot shower, the girls ventured down to the common kitchen area. They couldn’t believe their eyes when they saw how well equipped it was. There was a stove, a refrigerator and a microwave. The hostel provided all the facilities and the utensils to cook with. But the residents had to buy the food themselves. Alessa had enough money to buy food that would keep them going for a couple of weeks, but she would need to find work so that she could pay the rent. The two of them made a list of the food items they would bring back to the hostel so they could cook meals together.
Just off the kitchen was a dining area where a group of older teens were sitting having a meal. They greeted the girls and invited them to join them for lunch. Alessa explained they had just gotten there and hadn’t yet bought any groceries. The teens insisted they had more than enough for them. Alessa and Lucy noticed the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches they were making and joined them happily. They both ate like savages as the group watched them with curiosity.
Alessa looked up from her sandwich and noticed how they were all staring at the two of them. She wiped her mouth with her napkin and put down the remaining morsel of her sandwich. “I’m sorry,” she admitted a little shamefully. “We’re eating like pigs. We’ve been traveling for a couple of days and haven’t really eaten much on the way. We’re both starving.”
Lucy couldn’t care less what they thought. She finished the last remnants of her sandwich, licked her fingers clean and asked, “Can I have another one?”
The teens laughed, telling the girls to go ahead and prepare another sandwich for themselves.
After lunch, they thanked the group and found their way outside. As they strolled along the streets of Philadelphia, Alessa worried about her next step, listening half-heartedly to Lucy chattering away about how nice the people were at the hostel. Later that night, after the child was asleep, Alessa thought hard about her next decision. She knew she could dance at one of the go-go clubs in the city. That wouldn’t be an issue. She knew she was very good at it and remembered how much money it had made her at Doubles. She could work retail, but realized she would make just enough money to get by. And that wouldn’t be enough. If she were to give Lucy and herself any kind of life, she needed to earn a substantial amount. It boiled down to two options: selling sex and dancing at a club. Alessa decided that without someone like Harlin involved, dancing would be very lucrative for her. She was convinced she didn’t want to work as a prostitute. She’d only done it the last four days to get them off the streets.
She made the decision to go back to dancing—this time, on her own terms. After she had saved enough money, she would look to buy her own house. Uppermost in her mind was her desperation to keep Lucy off the streets. There was only one problem: she would have to leave her on her own when she went off to the club at night. She decided to talk to her roommates and try to persuade them to take turns in keeping an eye on the child. She would say she was stocking shelves at a grocery store in the evenings. With her plan all chalked out, she told herself:
fuck anybody that ain’t me!
That would be her new attitude from now on. She was past being everyone else’s bitch. She was going to make things better for herself and for Lucy and dared anyone to get in her way.
The next morning, Lucy and Alessa went to the pay phone in the hostel for their weekly call to Ebby. Lucy dialed the number and excitedly told Ebby about all the new teenagers they had met the day before. Ebby listened carefully. She had long since concluded that Alessa had been keeping the truth from her. She suspected they were living on the streets. After all, months had passed and she knew from experience that shelters for the homeless typically never allowed people to stay on for an indefinite period. There was one other thing that disturbed her: Lucy never talked about her parents.
When Alessa got on the phone, Ebby said, “I haven’t heard from you in a while. What’s going on? Where are you? Alessa, I know you’re determined to take care of yourself without depending on others, but it’s time you stopped lying to me. I need to know the truth.”
Alessa caved in. She spared Ebby nothing, recounting the details of her life under the bridge, in the abandoned house, in the motel they had moved to, after Lucy fell ill, and now at the hostel where they were staying at present. Ebby heaved a sigh of relief, but scolded Alessa for lying to her. Alessa was apologetic, but explained how she had been determined to figure out her situation on her own and resolve her issues by herself.
Then she asked, “Ebby, have you heard anything from the police about Harlin? I was too afraid to ask you about him all these months, but now I need to know.”
“I have,” Ebby replied. “Harlin was convicted of assault with a deadly weapon two months ago. He was sentenced to five years in prison and will be eligible for parole in three years.”
Alessa let out a quick shout of relief. “Thank you, God!”
Ebby laughed.
Alessa’s concern over Harlin had to do with her decision to dance again at a go-go club. She knew that he, along with his crew, frequented those clubs. And now that he was no longer welcome at Doubles, there was every chance of him prowling the other joints and finding her.
“So what will you do now to pay rent at the hostel?” Ebby asked.
“I managed to get a job stocking shelves at night at a grocery store,” Alessa promptly answered. “I’ll make enough to keep us here, until I can save money and move on.”
“And what about Lucy?” Ebby persisted. “Where are her parents?”
Alessa’s response was abrupt, “She doesn’t have any, Ebby. She’s just got me. I am her only family now. She’s happy and so am I. So don’t worry, okay?”
Ebby said she wouldn’t, but couldn’t help cautioning her. “Alessa,” she said, “you still need to be careful. You do realize that you have no legal right to keep Lucy with you? I am going to work on some things from my end and see if we can get her into school.”
“Thanks, Ebby. That would be great. She’s really smart and I think she would love going back to school. I’ll call you again tomorrow. Bye.”
Knowing that Alessa was talking about her, Lucy had perked up. “Am I going to school?” she asked. “I really want to go to school, Alessa. Can I go, please? Please?”
Alessa smiled as she took the child in her arms. “Ebby is going to see if she can help us get you back into school,” she said. “We need to be careful, though. We have to make sure that no one separates us. We’re family, but other people might not see it that way. I’m sure Ebby can help, but we’ll have to be patient.”