Blind Squirrels (18 page)

I persuaded Olivia to apply as a
member.  We weren’t seeing much of each other at school, so I thought this
would be a good way to spend time together.  Amazingly, Olivia agreed.

The first week went well. 
One-hundred percent of the applicants dressed according to the rules and showed
up at Pete’s house on Thursday.  We passed out the flour to the fifteen
candidates and told them the rules.  After we had covered everything, Olivia
raised her hand.

“What if we bust the bag?  Does
that mean we won’t get in?”

Well, maybe we didn’t cover
everything.  I quickly made up a new rule.  “Not necessarily.”  Hopefully, that
would appease Olivia and the other applicants.

“What’s the point then?  If I can
get in without carrying around this stupid bag of flour, then I’m not carrying
around this stupid bag of flour.”

Olivia was beginning to get on my
nerves.  “I didn’t say you could or couldn’t get in.  It depends.”  I had to
think fast.  “You get points for everything you do – including how many signatures
you get.  If the bag breaks, you’ll lose points.  Just like if you don’t wear pajamas
tomorrow.”

Rita Daltery – now the club
president – came to my rescue.  “We’ve given you the rules.  If you don’t
follow them, you won’t get as many points.  Total points will determine who
gets in and who doesn’t.”  Olivia sat down and looked a little annoyed, but she
kept quiet.  “By the way,” Rita added, “you might want to get members to sign a
sheet of paper, too – just in case your bag gets busted.  Then you’ll still
have a record of everyone you talked to.”  Rita was fairly good at making up
rules as she went along.

A week later, Olivia had every
member’s signature on her bag.  I was very proud of her.

That Friday, we met in Mrs. Kalakos’
room.  Olivia wasn’t there.  Three candidates had dropped out of the
qualifying; another five had dropped their bags.  Of the remaining six
applicants, none had more than seven signatures on their bag.  Still, we
accepted the eleven that were present into the club. 

Just before the meeting ended, Olivia
came bolting into the room.  She rushed up to Mrs. Kalakos’ desk with a huge
bag of flour and it suddenly flew out of her hand.  The bag seemed to move in
slow motion as it sailed over the desk and hit on the edge of Mrs. Kalakos’
chair.  Flour flew everywhere and soon Mrs. Kalakos' desk and chair were
covered in it.  So was the floor and Olivia.  Olivia began sobbing.

I rushed up to the desk.  “Olivia,
what happened?”

“I had all of those signatures,
remember?” she sobbed.  I nodded and she continued, “I was so happy, but, this
morning, I dropped my flour on the way to the bus stop.  I ran home and got the
five pound bag of flour my mom bought at the store a few days ago.  I was late
because I was trying to put all of the signatures on the new bag so no one
would know I busted the other one.  Now look what happened.”

“So you didn’t think anyone would
notice that your bag had grown by four pounds during the week?” I asked.

“I thought maybe everyone would
believe that it got bigger and heavier as I got the signatures.  Dang it, Kat,
I didn’t really think about that,” Olivia moaned.

Everyone started laughing at Olivia’s
story, and I told her that she could still be in the club.  She seemed
genuinely happy.  I know I was.

As the days slowly passed, I
began hanging around Felicia and Laura more and more.  I often left Olivia and Aurelia
so I could be with them.  Felicia and Laura seemed cooler than Olivia, and I
wanted to be popular.  When Felicia and Laura talked about other people, I joined
right in – thinking they would accept me.  Laura and Felicia soon started
making fun of Olivia.  I wouldn’t join in, but I didn’t tell them to stop
either.  Whenever I hung around Olivia, I felt guilty for not defending her. 
My solution was to hang around her less.

Olivia never gave up on me.  She
continued to be my friend even when she knew what Felicia and Laura were saying
about her.  Olivia never did anything to hurt me, and she never tried to make
me stop being friends with Laura or Felicia.  She did warn me several times
that Laura and especially Felicia were just using me and that they weren’t
really my friends at all.

I did notice that when Felicia
was around, Laura tried to impress her, and she didn’t mind humiliating me to
do it.  But when Felicia wasn’t there, Laura was the way she’d been in middle
school.  I was clearly Laura’s best friend when Felicia wasn’t present, but,
when Felicia showed up, she was suddenly Laura’s best friend – and I was just a
peon, an underling, a nobody.  Nevertheless, I stuck with them and allowed my
friendship with Olivia to become secondary. 

In October, I momentarily
resurrected my friendship with Olivia.  She got her driver’s license, and she
began driving us to our Bons Copains meetings.  We also started hanging out on
the weekends, and this is the time we started driving past Pete’s house.  Olivia
would bring either her John Denver tape or her Statler Brothers tape, and I was
soon singing along to all the songs.

I was anxiously awaiting my
sixteenth birthday for two reasons: I’d be able to drive and date.  My car – a
bright green Barracuda – was already waiting for me.  My parents had bought it
from my brother Rick just for me.  None of my other friends had their own car,
so I felt very lucky.  The date – a sailor named Greg that my mom met at the
beauty shop – was also waiting for me.  He kept begging my mom to let him take
me out before I turned sixteen because he was going to transfer just before
Christmas.  She relented two weeks before my birthday.

I hadn’t met Greg, but my mom
told me that he was cute and nice.  I soon learned that my mom didn’t know
everything.  We were going to go out on Friday night.  I put on an attractive
outfit and waited with growing anticipation.  He was late.  I waited two hours,
and he never showed up.  I didn’t know whether to be devastated or humiliated. 
I put on my nightgown and stared out the window.  The ringing phone startled
me.  It was Greg.  He had drawn duty for the night, but would I mind if he came
over the next day?  He was so sweet and apologetic that I agreed.

The next day, a dark blue Toyota
truck pulled into our driveway.  Greg wasn’t exactly what I was expecting, but
I reserved judgment on him.  I had imagined a thin, handsome man – maybe
something like my dad – since my mother had picked him out for me.  Greg was
tall – almost six feet – and he was chubbier than I imagined most Navy men to
be.  He had a round chubby baby face and baby blue eyes.  He parted his brown
hair on the left side and it was very short.  He was nineteen years old, and
he’d only been in the Navy for six months.  He was wearing blue jeans and a
navy-blue jersey with gold writing – very similar to my Bons Copains jersey.

I glanced at my fancy pantsuit
and panicked.  My mom agreed to keep him company until I changed into something
more casual.  I came out in my club jersey and blue jeans; we matched
perfectly.

Greg and I saw each other almost
every day until he transferred to Orlando, Florida.  He took me out on my
sixteenth birthday, and I had so much fun.  Laura was dating a guy name Billy,
and the four of us would go out together.  We had some really good times
together, but Max was always in the back of my mind.  I would even have Greg
drive me by Max’s whenever we went out.  Greg didn’t know, of course.  He just
didn’t know my neighborhood well enough to get out without my direction.  I was
always hoping that Max would see us together and get jealous, but it never
happened.

Greg left in Mid-December.  He
took my address, but I knew he’d never write to me.  I was just someone to fill
time with – and he was the same to me.  Going out with Greg was better than not
going out.

The day after Greg left was our Bons
Copains Christmas party at Mrs. Kalakos’ house.  My mom let me drive, and Olivia
rode with me.  I also invited Donna and her sister Colleen, and they rode with
us, too.  We arrived a little early, and Dmitri asked us to go over to the mall
and pick up some Ping-Pong balls.  I hesitated because I had heard that Max was
going to be at the party, and I didn’t want to miss him.  I hadn’t seen him in
months.  When I realized that it would only take a few minutes, I gave in, and Olivia,
Donna, Colleen, and I left for the mall.

We quickly found a sporting goods
store and bought two packs of Ping-Pong balls.  As we headed back to the
parking lot, Colleen and Olivia spotted Santa Claus.

“Let’s go see Santa!” Olivia
said.

“Yeah!  Come on!”  This was Colleen. 
Colleen was outgoing like Olivia.  She was always joking around and making me
laugh.  Her personality and Donna’s were very similar, but they didn’t look
like sisters at all.  Of course, both girls had been adopted by the Daleys, so
their differing looks were understandable.  Colleen fit in well with her Irish
Catholic family: long red hair, emerald green eyes, and pale freckly skin.  She
was also tall and thin, a vast contrast to Donna’s chubby little body. 

“Olivia!  Please, you know I want
to get back to the party.  I can’t miss Max.”  I also didn’t want them to
embarrass me by being the only teenagers to visit Santa.

“Colleen!  Must you always
embarrass me?”  At least Donna was on my side.

Olivia and Colleen listened to
our objections, and then they ran over to Santa anyway.  I watched in horror as
they took turns sitting on his lap.  Donna’s dismay was equally visible.  After
a few minutes, we started walking for the car.  We were not going to associate
with those two nincompoops.

Olivia and Colleen showed up at
the car just as I was deciding to leave them.  Donna and I refused to speak to
either of them.  Colleen insisted on talking.

“We were only having fun.  Isn’t
that what tonight is all about?  Life is too short to live like squares. 
Lighten up...Have fun!”

Donna and I decided that maybe Colleen
was right.  We had only wasted ten minutes.  No one had laughed and pointed at
us.  It wasn’t the end of the world.

Back at Mrs. Kalakos’ house,
there was no sign of Max.  I sighed with relief.

As I headed towards the game room
with the Ping-Pong balls, I noticed that quite a few guests were there.  Sunny,
Rita, and several new members were sitting in the living room, while Pete
McDermott and Kenny Byron stood in the kitchen eating.  Kenny was a snob who
thought he was God’s gift to women.  Most girls thought he was gorgeous – sandy
brown hair in a tight perm, big blue eyes, a pleasant face, and a perfect
body.  I suppose he was cute enough, but I couldn’t stand him.  Once you ripped
off the pretty paper, you would want to return the gift right away.  He was
rude and obnoxious to almost everyone.  He had no desire to learn – football
would get him where he wanted to go.  I had learned all I needed to know about
Kenny in Physics class where he spent most of his time sleeping.  Pete and
Kenny were best friends, so I found myself being leery of Pete, too.

Michael Barr was in the game
room, and he was happy to see the Ping-Pong balls.  I watched him play a game
with Dmitri, and then Pete came in to challenge Mike.  They struck up a
conversation, and I eavesdropped.  After a little small talk, they moved on to
something of interest.

“How long have you been here,
Pete?” Mike asked.

“Twenty minutes maybe,” Pete
answered.

“I guess you saw Max Savage
then,” Mike said.

“Yeah.  He was with Matt
Bruin...All right!  My point!”  Pete went on to win the game, and there was no
more talk of Max.

After the game was over, I pulled
Mike to the side.  “Did you say Max was already here?  Where is he now?”

“Oh, he only stayed about five
minutes.  He and Matt were going somewhere else.  He did ask about you though.”

“He did not!”  I wanted to
believe, but I couldn’t.

“Dmitri told him that you went to
buy Ping-Pong balls and that you’d be right back.  Then Sunny told him that
your boyfriend was also coming to the party.  Max left right after that.”  Mike
seemed sincere, and he didn’t really know that I loved Max.

“Boyfriend?  I don’t have a
boyfriend.  Why did she tell him that?”

“You’ll have to ask her.”

I stormed out of the game room
and headed straight for Sunny.  Just as I reached her, she looked up and
smiled.  “Is your boyfriend here?  I really want to meet him.”

Her innocent look stalled me
out.  All I could manage was, “Huh?”

“Your boyfriend, Greg.  Where is
he?”  I wondered how she knew about Greg.  I hadn’t really bragged about him or
anything.

“Greg isn’t my boyfriend.  I dated
him for a while, but he’s moved to Orlando now.  I’ll probably never see him
again.”

“That’s too bad.  Oh, by the way,
did you know Max was here earlier?  He asked about you.”

I urgently had to get away from
Sunny.  She hadn’t meant to, but she had ruined my night – my life even.  I ran
outside into the cool night air.  Mike was standing in the driveway with a
beer.  “Where can I get one of those?” I asked.

Mike opened a cooler and took out
a bottle.  “Oh, yeah.  I almost forgot that you’re the beer guzzling queen. 
Here.  There’s plenty more where that came from.”