Blood Haze (17 page)

Rising
from the table, she began to clear away their breakfast debris. Moving to the
sink, she placed the dishpan in the sink, squirted detergent into it before
turning on the water. She’d assumed, due to their limited faux-relationship,
she didn’t need to tell him about things… about her mother’s visions, about her
father… about her own glimpsing. No, she’d at least be spared that. She was so
afraid once she told him things about her past, he’d think her certifiably
crazy just like most others had when she’d ever disclosed to them about her
glimpsings. Drew had been the only one who’d stuck by her. As the thought of
Drew entered her head, she began to feel guilty, even though she knew she had
no reason it be.

She
heard his chair as it scraped back, then felt his hands on her hips.

Against
her ear, he murmured, “Arabella, talk to me.”

She
allowed the water to flow over her fingers. “It’s all in the past. What’s the
use of dredging up ancient history?”

“It
obviously still bothers you. Just tell me. What? Do you think I’ll judge you or
something? I won’t, you know.”

“You
can say that because you don’t know,” she replied.

Reaching
over her, he shut the water off, and turned her to face him. “We can do this
the hard way or the easy way. You decide,” he said firmly.

She
stared up at him, begging him not to make her do this, but his gaze was gentle
but unrelenting. Maybe it would be better to just tell him and get it over
with. If he left her now, she’d be able to endure it. If whatever they were
doing went on and she lost him later, she wasn’t so sure. Somehow she knew that
losing Lynx would be much more excruciating than losing Drew. That thought
stunned her. He’d been very clear… they were not in a relationship. This was
just…
this
. Being this close to him,
inhaling him into her senses confused her.

Needing
space, she slid out from between him and the sink and sank back down into her
chair. He followed and reclaimed his own seat. Picking up the salt shaker, she
fiddled with it to give her hands something to do. Inhaling deeply, she raised
her eyes to his briefly before turning her gaze to the sliding-glass doors. Finally,
she decided,
what did it really matter
?
He could find out anything he wanted about her from those in town. Wasn’t it better
if he heard it from her side of things?

“As
you know, my mother was a singer on the stage. She was very talented and had
things been different, she might have gone far. But she met my father, got
married, and once she got pregnant with me, he didn’t want to raise a child in
the city, and so they bought this place. We were happy here in the beginning.”

“What
happened to change that?” he asked.

She
glanced down at the salt shaker before directing her gaze back to his. “My
mother was a psychic.”

His
brows furrowed. “Psychic? In what way?”

“She
had visions of things. Sometimes it was of the past and sometimes of future
events.”

He
bowed his head and gave a small smile. “That wasn’t what I was expecting. I
thought maybe she was an ax-murderer or something,” he said with a slight
smile. “That doesn’t sound so bad.”

She
gave a shrug of her shoulders. “In and of itself, it wasn’t. But people don’t
really like what they don’t understand. And they certainly don’t like the ugly
parts of their lives revealed,” she said softly.

“She
had visions about other people?”

“Yes.
Anyone she came into contact with. Of course, as a caterer, she came into
contact with lots of people,” she said.

“And
she would tell them about the visions, I’m assuming.”

“That’s
what the altercation was about at the club?”

She
nodded. “She was considered a freak by some and a lunatic by others. We were
ostracized by most and harassed by many. We had bottle-rockets thrown through
our window, crosses burned in our yard, death threats mailed to us, or sent via
brick-mail through our windows. The neighbor kids weren’t allowed to play with me
and Ian. It was… bad,” she finished quietly.

He
reached over and covered her hand with his own. “I can’t even imagine. You must
have been so scared.”

“It
was hardest on my father. He couldn’t keep a job, so he felt he was a failure
as a provider and a protector. In the end, he just couldn’t endure it. He shot
himself. That was… awful!”

Lynx
reached over and pulled her over into his lap and wrapped his arms around her.
He nuzzled her hair. “Oh, my girl,” he whispered. He stopped himself from
examining too closely the overwhelming need he had to comfort her again.

“It’s
ironic, really, about my mother’s death. Over time, she’d stopped discussing
her visions no matter what, and slowly people forgot about it… about her. After
all that we had endured and the threats we’d suffered – she’d suffered, she was
mugged and killed for the money in her purse.”

He
continued to rub his face against her hair. “I wonder why she didn’t see it
coming,” he said thoughtfully.

“I
think she did. She was acting really weird prior to her death. But she never
would tell me what she saw. I think she thought she was protecting us or
something.”

“That’s
tragic. How long ago was that?” he asked, as he began to run his nose up and
down her neck.
 

“Almost
a year.” She stretched her neck to give him better access. “That’s why I
struggle about Drew,” she felt him tense underneath her. She turned toward him
and grabbed his face. “He was the only one who knew the truth and stuck with us
anyway. It… it means something.”

He
stared into her eyes as if he were trying to see into her very soul. Without
breaking her gaze, he picked her up effortlessly and spun her until she
straddled him. He reached down and un-tucked his towel, letting it fall aside.
With slow hands, he unbuttoned the shirt she wore and parted it. He ran his
hands over her body underneath. She leaned into him and kissed him lightly as
her breathing grew more rapid. It amazed her that she could go from calm to
sizzling-hot in the span of seconds. It was like he had some kind of power over
her body.

He
broke the kiss, his breathing just as ragged as hers. Against her ear, he
whispered, “You are an amazing person and I want all of you.”

Lifting
her, he placed her over his engorged shaft and lowered her down. She groaned at
the exquisite fullness of it. With his hands on her hips, he lifted her up and
slid her back down. He leaned forward and placed a wet kiss against her nipple,
suckling it deep within his mouth. She arched into him as pleasure spiraled out
of control within her. She tangled her fingers into his silky strands and
tilted her hips when he shifted her down. Her body was quivering and even after
only minimal contact, she was on fire. She’d never experienced sex like this
before.

He
lifted his head and gazed steadily into her eyes. And while her body was still
on fire, she seemed numb to everything else outside of this moment. As he
continued to lift and move her, he said softly, “I’m going to do something and
I don’t want you to be afraid. You will be fine, it will only sting for an
instant. Okay?” he asked, even though he knew she’d not be able to deny him
through the gazing. Slowly, she nodded her head as she panted.

He
held her eyes for as long as he could before lowering his lips to the throbbing
vein in her neck. He placed a gentle kiss against her soft flesh and his
excitement at the feel of his body plunging into her moist softness and the
scent of her pulsating blood made him feel like a savage. It took all his years
of leaned restraint not to tear into her neck. Instead, he felt with his tongue
until he found the marks left by the other vamp. He lashed over that spot with
his tongue, secreting enough venom to deaden the area. He sensed the change in
her as she whimpered in her need, close to her release. Her blood was heated
within her body and he inhaled its scent. His body trembled as he fought to
maintain his control, but all the external elements – her scent, and his shaft
buried deep in her – made it nearly impossible.

Not
able to bear another moment, he sank his teeth in her flesh and inhaled her.
God
! He’d never tasted anything so sweet
in his entire existence. He pulled hard against her neck and gulped the
delicious juices flowing into his mouth. He rolled his body within her, his
desires seeming to coalesce into one. She jerked against him and he felt the change–
her fear beginning to overshadow her desire.

Selfishly,
wanting to enjoy this, he thrust up into her and held her tight as she
struggled to get away from him as he drank her life’s nectar. Her heart began
to pound wildly in fear and it only heightened his animalistic need to conquer.
She began to really struggle now, but he held her tightly as he sucked from her
neck. He continued until he felt her struggles begin to wane. He could have drunk
from her for hours, but didn’t want to hurt her. Before he was really ready, he
unlatched his teeth and pulled back. The feeding had his own sexual need
welling up in him and he wanted to slam brutally into her over and over. But,
again selfishly, he wanted her with him. He wanted her hazed before they
finished so she would remember at least that part of it - be a part of this
most luscious partaking in that way.

He
looked into her wild, terrified eyes, tears streaking down her beautiful face. He’d
seen this same looks hundreds of times in his existence, and usually it
satisfied something in the beast buried within him. His chest burned with
unfamiliar shame as he looked into her eyes and saw the terror and revulsion.
He also saw betrayal there. He sat still for a long moment. He hated seeing
that look in her eyes. Gone was the loving, heated gaze, replaced with horror
and fear. He found for the first time, he didn’t like it. Even though he knew
she’d never remember it… he knew he’d never forget it.

He
quickly grabbed her head between his hands and pressed his thumbs against her
temples as he leveled his gaze on hers. She shuddered and whimpered and tried
in vain to jerk away. In seconds, he had her hazed. She’d never remember
anything from the point where he pressed his lips against her neck till now.

She
blinked up at him sluggishly and smiled at him coyly as she leaned forward and
pressed her lips against his. She rocked her hips and he was once again
reminded of being buried deep within her. Grasping her hips once more, he
lifted her, then let her slide back down. For him, the intensity of the moment
was now gone. He held her quivering form against his cool body and plunged up
into her automatically until they both found their release.

Panting,
she buried her face in the crook of his neck. “Did I do something wrong,” she
whispered.

He
wrapped his arms securely around her and pressed his lips against her temple.
“No, of course not. Why do you ask?”

She
shrugged her shoulders, “I… I just don’t really know your rules to this…
whatever it is. You seemed… to… I don’t know… want it over or something.” She
blushed and buried her face back in the crook of his neck.

He
pulled her back to look into her face. She was just so beautiful. He traced the
contours of her face. “I’m sorry. I was afraid of hurting you,” he said
truthfully, but for reasons she wouldn’t understand.

She
studied his face looking for reassurance. He should have realized how incredibly
fragile she was right now. She’d gone through a lot in the past week. He pulled
her back into his chest and wrapped his arms around her. He stared off over her
shoulder. He couldn’t help but think he’d just made a serious mistake. This was
bound to blow up in his face.

Pressing
one last kiss against her temple, he reached behind and unlatched her still
trembling arms from around his neck. He pressed a kiss against her knuckles. “I
need to go. Are you going to be okay?” he asked.

Her
head was swimming and she shivered at the distance now between them. She was
oddly hurt by it even though he’d told her this was how it would be. She
couldn’t help but wonder if his withdrawal had to do with what she’d told him
about her family. She swallowed hard and only nodded.

She
berated herself for needing this man she barely knew. Was she so desperate to
not be alone that she was willing to cling to just anyone? How pathetic did
that make her? But as she looked into his majestic face and took in the magical
allure he exuded, she knew it was something more than that. It was almost as if
he were the other half of herself – the part of her soul which had been
missing; the part she’d been searching for. And now, he was pulling away from
her. Panic burned in her chest.

Inhaling
deeply to center herself, she rose quickly from his body and stumbled back as a
severe feeling of lightheadedness overtook her. He reached out a hand to steady
her and it took everything in her not to flinch away from his touch.

“Arabella,”
he said softly.

Working
to fortified herself, she stepped back, his hand falling away from her hip. She
glanced away from him and shrugged his shirt from her shoulders. “Here,” she
said handing it to him, “You’ll need this.” With that, she turned and rushed to
the master bathroom. Needing to drown him out, she turned the shower on and
stood under the pounding water for a long while. When she emerged, he was gone.