Blue Love (21 page)

Tessa
’s heart pounded hard against her chest and finally she was able to pull her eyes away from him. Luke pulled her head to his chest and kissed her gently, “Stop it,” Tessa whispered and pulled her head back.

Luke watched Tessa
, his gaze was intense. Tessa looked for Luke’s Mom in the crowd and she wasn’t there. Tessa looked back at him.
Why wasn’t she there
she wondered.

~

The rest of the night Tessa avoided Luke, she danced and had fun with her friends, occasionally she saw him and each time he was watching her.

“
Hey,” Alex said, “after the dance a bunch of us should go to camp” he said. Everyone agreed.

Tessa had Toby stop by the house so she could change, she put on jeans and a long sleeve tee. She ran out and he had changed into
jeans and was in the process of putting on a sweatshirt when she walked out. He was jacked, her jaw dropped and he looked at her. He laughed. “Damn Toby,” slipped out of her mouth and he laughed, “My future husband is fine,” Tessa said and laughed.

“
And the Future Mrs. Green is hot as hell, and a Queen,” he said. “Jump on,” he said pointing at his back and she did. He carried her out to the car.

The boys pulled in and jumped out to change, Luke was with them. She laughed and smacked Toby on the ass and yelled
“Giddy up Cowboy,” he plopped her in and buckled her up. He grabbed a cowboy hat from the back and placed it on her head and tore out of the driveway. Luke swallowed hard and walked inside with the boys and changed.

~

Tessa and Toby were there first, they started a bonfire and pulled a big lounge out and sat in it. He pulled her into him. They watched as a few trucks pulled in. Tessa started to get up and he pulled her back. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head, “Relax and enjoy Tessa.”

They all walked down an
d sat around the fire, some their friends brought beer and Tessa asked for one.

Toby laughed,
“Your dad would have your fine little ass girl,” he laughed.

“
And he would have yours i he heard you say that,” Tessa said shivering.

He whispered in her ear
“Check this out,” he stood up and loudly said, “Angel you cold.”

“
Why yes I am,” she answered smiling. He slowly pulled his sweatshirt off and put it on her. “Better angel?” Toby asked.

“
Not quite yet,” she laughed. Everyone was looking and Luke was fuming mad.

“
I will be right back angel,” Toby smiled and kissed her cheek.

“
Holy shit Tessa he is freaken hot,” Jade said, and everyone except Tommy and Luke laughed.

“
He is, and he is nice, and he kiss’s...” she started.

“
Like what?” Toby asked picking her up and planting one on her.

“
Just like that,” Tessa said and laughed.

The cooler was next to Luke, Tessa went to grab another beer and he closed the cooler with his foot.
“Excuse me,” she said and laughed.

“
You’ve had enough,” Luke said sternly.

Tessa pushed his foot off and grabbed one and slammed it and threw the can at his feet. She grabbed another and did the same. Tessa went for another and Luke slammed it again. She shoved his foot off and grabbed three and walked away. She sat down and glared at him and he at her.

“Thirsty Angel,” Toby asked and laughed.

“
Yes,” Tessa said. Toby laughed at her and pulled her on his lap.

“
Tessa,” he said and grabbed a blanket and covered them up, “Slow down.”

“
No,” she pouted, “Shouldn’t you be kissing me?”

He pulled away and looked at her,
“No regrets, no awkward moments after tonight. I am not rebound material Tessa, I am a keeper and you angel deserve to be kept. But one more kiss for me,” His kiss was soft and caring. She enjoyed it very much. “How was that Tessa?” he asked.

“
Beautiful,” she whispered.

“
Do you need more?” he asked.

“
No Toby I can wait,” Tessa said and he smiled. She knew that was exactly how he meant for it to be.

Toby uncovered their faces and smiled at her lovingly. She closed her eyes and laid her head on his chest and fell asleep.

“We are out of beer,” Mark said.

“
There are three over here, she doesn’t need them,” he said stroking her hair. He looked at Luke and shook his head slowly. Luke knew that this man cared for her, but it didn’t make this any easier. He broke her, she told him so, and now Toby was going to fix her.
Because I don’t know how, he thought.
He stood up and walked to Tommy.

“
Hey man, I am going to go down to the cabin and crash, you staying here?” Luke asked.

“
Ya Alex is too,” Tommy said.

“
Alright see you in the morning,” Luke said.

“
How can you talk to him?” Jade asked.

“
Pretty girl, he’s my friend, I have known him all my life, and I love him like a brother,” he said. Jade saw the hurt in his eyes and understood.

“
Ok,” she said. “Ok,” she kissed him and he moaned. She smiled, “four and a half more months there hot stuff.”

“
It’s going to kill me; do you have any clue how amazing you looked tonight? Now? Every day!” Tommy asked.

Jade smiled and answered,
“Yes I do” and laughed.

Chapter
13

Toby picked up Tessa and carried her down to the cabin and laid her down. He kissed her cheek
“Sleep angel, I’ll be back.”

Luke had heard him leave and got up and climbed down the ladder from the loft. He sat and stared at her,
she was an angel
. Luke lightly rubbed her hand. Her skin was so soft, her lips full and beautiful. Her hair was tousled and a strand hung down her cheek, he lightly pushed it off her face. He desperately wanted to hold her but knew it wasn’t okay. He bent down and kissed her lips lightly. Her mouth opened slightly. He pulled at her bottom lip with his lips gently. “Luke,” she whispered “I love you,” she was still sound asleep and a tear fell down her face. Luke gently kissed it away. Her heard the door and climbed up the stairs and lay in bed.

~

Toby lay in bed next to her, and held her in his arms. She opened her eyes. “Sorry Tess did I wake you?”

“
No I had a dream,” Tessa said.

“
Wasn’t about me was it,” Toby said.

“
No, it wasn’t,” she admitted.

“
Tess what happened?” Toby asked.

“
It’s complicated, very, very complicated,” she said.

“
Do you want to share?” he asked.

“
I don’t know, I feel weird telling you my issues with him,” Tessa admitted.

“
Oh no Tessa this is me. You and I have known each other forever, don’t start acting funky on me I won’t let things be weird. I asked you to the dance and quickly figured out why you had no date,” he said laughing.

“
What gave it away, I mean at first?” she asked.

“
When you sent me to ask Alex permission should have been my first clue, the Tess I know and love doesn’t ask permission for anything,” Toby laughed. “But that didn’t give it away, it was the quarterback, when I asked Alex for permission the quarterback sneered
no you can’t
at me through clenched teeth,” he laughed.

“
Seriously?” she laughed.

What did you expect Tessa, you set me up Luke thought
.

“
So did you have ..?” Toby started to ask and she interrupted him.

“
Toby! You’re really going to ask me that?” she said.

“
Why not?’ he asked.

Because it
’s none of your fucking business dick, Luke thought.

“
No actually I even got drunk and apparently showed him my boobs and asked him to bite them and he didn’t,” Tessa said and they both laughed, “Toby why do you think he didn’t?”

“
He cares about you Tessa, just seems like the kind of guy who doesn’t know how to show it, maybe he’s afraid, maybe he’s a virgin,” Toby said.

Maybe you are
a punk, Luke wanted to scream.

Tessa laughed out loud,
“Oh no he’s not I was going to be unlucky number 13,” she said disgusted.

“
Damn!” he said and laughed.

Tessa told him about Sadi and the three B
’s. About the many times she offered herself and Toby listened. She told him about the good things too and that she loved him and he said that he loved her, but she didn’t tell him the personal stuff. Not about the abortion or the drunken mother or absent father, she held his secrets safe. And then she told him about the day she stopped at his house and how her body froze and that she never thought it was possible to be numb and still feel the dull nagging pain she has felt since it happened. She told him about Marie being number one, and what she had said about Toby being her number one, they laughed.

“
You are going to get through this Tessa, I am going to help you,” Toby said. “You know how you felt when you kissed me tonight and not the ones that were part of the scandal?” he giggled.

Fuck Luke thought, I need to get out of here.

“Yes,” she said softly.

“
What did it feel like?” he asked.

“
Like it was enough, like it wasn’t rushed, like it would be there whenever I wanted it,” Tessa admitted.

“
Ok and what about yours with him?” he asked.

Luke wanted to scream.

“I couldn’t get enough,” she said, “and I wanted more.”

“
Tess you know me right? You have known me for years. You know that if I tell you something I am going to do whatever it takes to get it done. I am safe and comfortable, I am not going to hurt you and in your heart you know that. Even though we have never had a conversation like this, even though we never had feelings like this for one another before right?” he asked.

“
I guess but I did have a crush on you most summers you helped with hay,” Tessa said and laughed.

“
And I have already told you I know your heart and love it. So with the quarterback, it’s not like that, and you are so eager to please him and titillated that he is interested in you that you’re trying to show him your breasts and ask him to...” Toby began.

“
Alright Toby I get it. I don’t know him; I haven’t formed a relationship with him based on trust and friendship right?” And she began to cry, “It was starting to Toby it really was, and then I don’t know what happened, I truly would hate to think it was over a bikini wax and Mani Pedi.”

“
Tessa do you talk to him as freely as that?” Toby asked.

“
What do you mean?” Tessa said.

“
Bikini Wax?” he laughed.

“
No he didn’t know that until I told him today,” she laughed, “I told him I wasn’t going to go through that pain for nothing and sort of alluded to the fact that,” she started.

“
I get it but you can’t talk like that to someone girl without driving him crazy,” he said.

“
Well why doesn’t it bother you?” she asked.

“
Oh Tessa it’s all about self-control. I want a relationship with you someday. If I check out the new do I would well. Tessa can we go to sleep please,” Toby said exhaling deeply.

“
Oh,” she said and she told him, “you should think about dead puppies, are you a virgin?” she asked.

Toby laughed,
“No Tessa.”

“
So how many women have you been with?” she asked.

“
Four,” he answered.

“
Oh” she said sounding surprised “Is four a lot?”

“
I don’t know, more than I should have been with,” Toby said.

“
So twelve is like way too many” she said exaggeratingly.

“
Different paths Tessa, don’t judge, just try to understand, everyone has their own path to walk,” he said, “But for you Tessa two is too many, got it,” he laughed, “What are you doing tomorrow?”

Minus the four women and his lips on my girl this guy should be wearing sandals and walking on
water, Luke thought.

“
Children’s choir practice and running are all that I have planned,” she yawned.

“
I have family to visit, after that can I take you on a real date, one with no pressure or expectations Tessa?” Toby asked.