Cara's Twelve (21 page)

“It would seem so,” he said and gave a bitter laugh.

“Is it true?” Tahdaon's deep voice echoed from the door.

Glancing over Finn's shoulder she saw Tahdaon and Helfrich enter the room. Helfrich shut the door behind them.

“I caught Cush in the hall just now. He said that the council has given control of Lydd over to Edmund's father.”

“It's true,” Cara said, taking the letter from Finn and giving it to Tahdaon to read.

Tahdaon eyes went hard, and he cursed loudly.

Helfrich frowned. “Why would the council give him that much power?”

“Ballack is the king's brother,” Cara offered. Balsam had grown up in Hellstrom. It would make sense that he favored the province.

“It wouldn't be his decision,” Helfrich corrected her. “In the absence of the Queen, the council would proceed over all provincial matters. Balsam wouldn't have any say in the decision.”

“Ballack's been paying off the council for years, as did his father before him,” Tahdaon muttered. “Hellstrom has always owned the council, and the more resources the province gains, the more the council becomes indebted to him. If you ask my opinion, I think Ballack's planning on overthrowing the crown.”

“That would be blasphemy. He would risk losing his title, his wealth.” Cara shook her head. “We should talk to Edmund and see what he knows.”

Tahdaon stalked towards her. His eyes blazed and color rose to his cheeks. “Are you really that naive? For all we know he's the one that wielded the knife that slit Batch's throat, although I'm pretty sure it was his henchmen Arwel that raped and beat the poor bastard first.”

Cara blanched. “”Raped?”

Tahdaon looked at Finn in astonishment. “You didn't tell her?”

Finn placed himself between them and turned to Cara. A fierce tic worked in Finn's jaw. “There were bruises on his body, old and new, and there was evidence that he had been raped before the attack.”

Cara shivered and closed her eyes.

“I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to worry.”

“That's becoming a catchphrase for us isn't it?” She didn't mean for her words to sound as harsh as they did. She placed her hand on Finn's chest reassuringly and turned to him. “You have reason to believe that it was Arwel and Edmund that killed Batch?”

Tahdaon looked at Finn and then back at her before he answered. “I think it was Arwel that abused him, but we have no evidence to prove that Edmund was involved.”

Helfrich shifted, but made no comment.

Cara rubbed her temples and then regarded Tahdaon. “Among the men, who do you trust?”

“Myself,” he scoffed.

She gave him a hard look. “Tell me who you think we can trust.”

He sighed and inclined his head towards the men in the room. “Finn and Helfrich, obviously.”

“Thanks,” Finn said sarcastically, and Cara nudged him in the ribs.

“Anyone else?”

“Efy is harmless, but I worry he doesn't have enough common sense to protect himself. Cush is no more than a child. He's already been targeted. I will try to keep an eye on him, but unless he chooses to protect himself then there's nothing any of us can do to keep him safe.”'

“And Hauk?”

Tahdaon hesitated. “He's trustworthy.”

Cara nodded. It was enough. If Tahdaon trusted him then she would as well.

“Wesley?”

He shrugged. “Wesley has his own interests. I don't think he has aligned himself with Edmund, but I also don't think he is fully committed to you.”

She nodded and turned to Finn. “From now on we need to stay in pairs at all time.”

“That's not possible,” Finn quipped, and she saw him bite his lip to keep from arguing further.

“We're going to have to make it possible. Even if it means sharing a chamber at night.”

“You can't be serious,” Tahdaon growled behind her.

“Finn,” Cara said, her eyes pleading. She knew that the men would fall in line if he did what she said. “Will you stay with Cush tonight?”

He nodded, albeit hesitantly.

“Helfrich you stay with Efy. I know Wesley's chambers are already full, but I will talk with Hauk and work something out.”

“Don't even think about suggesting I sleep in the same room as him,” Tahdaon protested.

“No-” Her voice caught in her throat, and she turned to face him. “I have other plans for you.”

Tahdaon's eyes searched her face. “And what might that be?”

Cara looked at him a long time and when she had gathered the courage, she said simply, “Tonight you stay with me.”

As the day progressed, Cara became less confident in her decision to pair up with Tahdaon. He shadowed her throughout her daily duties, and every chance he got he reminded her of how unnecessary his presence was. She knew he wasn't happy about the decision to be saddled with her, and he had gone out of his way to prove it. She tried to ignore his constant mumbling and sarcastic comments, but by the time supper was over she had had enough.

“Fine, I get it, “she snapped, after another of his derisive remarks. “You can take care of yourself. Good for you. If you really despise my company that much then go.”

She had stormed off, not waiting for a response.

In the hallway she found Wesley making his way towards the east end of the estates. He had all but ignored her since they had arrived in Colechester, and she still hadn't had the opportunity to confront him about his young lover. It was time that she found out exactly where his loyalties were, and whether or not she could trust him.

“In my chambers now,” she said, her voice more severe than she intended. “And bring Landon with you.”

Wesley's eyes bulged and his jaw went slack at her command, but he nodded in acknowledgement.

Cara almost smiled at his comedic expression. Instead, she looked at him sternly before turning on her heels and heading towards her chambers.

In her room, she prodded the fire and cursed Tahdaon under her breath. She knew she shouldn't let him get under her skin, but the harder she tried, the more stubborn he seemed to become. It had been almost half a year since they had left the palace, and despite her attempts to befriend him, he was as obstinate and reclusive as ever.

Pouring herself a cup of wine, she sat down by the hearth, and waited for Wesley to join her.

A hesitant knock sounded at the door, and she braced herself for what she was about to do. Tahdaon hadn't been sure where Wesley's loyalties lay, but she knew where his heart was most vulnerable, and whether it was dishonest or not she intended to use that weakness to secure his devotion.

“Come in,” she said, trying to sound commanding, hoping her voice didn't betray her own fears.

Wesley entered with Landon following behind him. The young man was tall and lean, his wide set brown eyes intelligent and watchful, and there was a stubborn set to his jaw that Cara hadn't noticed before. By his apparel, it was evident that he was middle class at best, and yet he held himself with the self-composed confidence of a man secure with his position in life. In spite of his arrogant poise, there was also fear etched in his perfectly chiseled features, and Cara intended to use it to her advantage.

“Shut the door,” she ordered.

With unsteady hands, Landon did as he was told. Wesley grimaced at the sound of the lock clicking behind him.

She took a sip of her wine and watched them over the rim of her cup. They seemed an unlikely pair, one tall, dark and lanky, the other stout and fair.

“I'm sure by the nature of our meeting, you are aware that I know of the affair between yourself and Landon.” Wesley started to speak, but she held up a hand to stop him. “I'm not here to judge you.”

Wesley looked down at the floor and nodded. “I didn't mean to deceive you. Our relationship started long before I knew I was to be consort.”

“I realize that,” Cara reassured, placing her cup on the table. She stood to meet his gaze. He was only a few inches taller than herself, but she had seen him wield a saber with the precision and grace of his rank, and she knew that despite his small stature he could be deadly if required. He was better friend than foe, and she was set on securing that alliance. “I'm not one to stand in the way of love, but there is also the matter of the vow you swore in the temple of Annul.”

Wesley's mouth was set in a grim line, but his gaze never faltered from hers. “I am ready to pay for my crimes, but I ask you to absolve Landon of any wrong doing. He has done nothing immoral except love a man who had been cursed by the goddess to live a life of self-denial.”

Cara let his words hang in the air, neither confirming nor denying her intentions. By his words alone she could have him punished for blasphemy, and he knew it well.

Wesley swallowed hard under her scrutiny, and a small bead of sweat rolled down the side of his face.

Finally she answered. “I have no intentions of bringing charges against you or Landon. Nor will I ever, unless either of you choose to renounce your loyalty to me.”

Wesley's eyes widened briefly, and then his brows drew downwards. “My word is sacred. I will not break my oath. You can be assured that my allegiance is to you.”

Cara looked at Landon. “And what of your loyalties? Would you be willing to swear an oath to me?”

“My heart belongs to Wesley, above country or queen. I cannot take a vow that would say otherwise.”

Wesley made a strangled sound deep in his throat.

Surprised by his words, Cara tilted her head and studied him. There was no malice in his expression, only unfaltering loyalty to a man who would never fully be able to reciprocate his devotion.

“I would never ask you to betray him, but you would be wise to note that in light of the vows Wesley made on the altar of Annul, any betrayal against myself would be an attack against him as well. So, I ask you again, can I trust you Landon?”

This time he nodded. “As I have said, my loyalties are with Wesley. He speaks highly of you, and believes that you will be a good queen. I trust his judgement. You can be assured that my loyalties align with Wesley's.”

For the time being she was satisfied with his response. It would be unwise to push any harder.

She looked back at Wesley, her smile pained with the knowledge that even if she allowed Landon to join them, they would never be truly free to love one another without restrictions or prejudice.

“There is a more pressing matter, and I need to know that if it came down to choosing sides, your alliance is with me.”

“There would be no hesitation,” Wesley said, letting out a ragged breath, and running his hands through his hair.

“I want you both to know that you have my blessing. I will never thwart your relationship, but by the laws of Annul I cannot publicly endorse it either.” She looked straight at Landon. “If you want to join us on tour, I would not say no, but I also can't promise protection. It is your choice”

For the first time since their meeting began, Landon looked genuinely dumbfounded. Whatever he had expected her to say, it was clear that it hadn't been that.

She saw something akin to gratitude flicker across Wesley's expression.

Picking up the poker, Cara began prodding the fire again. She struggled with what information she could trust them with, and decided that it was best to only share what was needed to help keep them safe.

“I'm sure you are both aware of the dangers that we face in the years ahead. I need you to tell your uncle and aunt to stop spreading rumors that Tahdaon was responsible for Batch's death. I know of their dislike of Dalglieshans, but it does no good for anyone to have them soil his reputation.”

“I will speak with them,” he assured, and then hesitated before asking, “Do you have any suspicion of who was responsible?”

Cara turned and looked at him intently. Here was the test, and she watched his expression closely as she gave him the information that could expose them. “There is a possibility that Edmund and Arwel were involved.”

Wesley's face paled and his pupils dilated in fear. “Then we all have reason to be afraid.”

“If it is so, then yes.”

“And if it is not?” Landon asked.

“Then we have caused unnecessary suspicion. Either way, it is has become evident that we must all keep our eyes and ears open. Batch had been marked as a traitor since Loewik. I cannot tell you for certain if his killer lives amongst us, but I do believe that we need to start taking extra precaution. For the time being, I have assigned Hauk to shadow you.”

“Hauk?” Wesley exclaimed.

“He's trustworthy. You needn't fear him. It's for your protection only, and I expect that you watch out for him as well.”

Wesley frowned but didn't argue.

“That's all for now,” she said, dismissing them, and turning back to the fire.

She didn't turn around when the door clicked shut.

Unfastening the front of her gown, she started to undress, and thought about calling Finn to her chambers, but that would mean leaving Cush alone. Already she was starting to regret this plan of having the men pair up. Tahdaon had made it clear once again that he didn't want to be near her, and now she was left alone with her own thoughts and yearnings.

Shifting the material to her ankles she stepped out of the gown, and stood wearing only the thin linen underdress. Unbraiding her hair, she used her fingers to comb through the tangles, and she flinched as her hair brushed against her hard taut nipples.

Despite everything that had happened throughout the day, her body ached with need. She cursed herself for the heat between her legs, and the inability to do anything to relieve herself properly. Closing her eyes, she ran her hand over her breasts, across her stomach, and rested her palm between her thighs. She moaned out loud as her need mounted, but her own touch had never been able to satisfy the hunger.

Sighing in resignation, she opened her eyes, turned towards her bed, and gasped in alarm at the sight of Tahdaon leaning against her door watching her.

“Don't stop on my behalf,” he said, his eyes dark and daring.

“Get out of here,” she hissed, feeling the blood rise to her face.

He pushed himself off the door and took two long strides towards her. “I thought you said you had plans for me.” He traced her collarbone with his finger and down the thin fabric, toying with the taut nipple beneath. “Isn't this what you had in mind?”

She shivered under his touch.

“No,” she lied, unable to move away from him, as he cupped her breast and continued to coax her nipple with his thumb.

“Are you sure about that?”

She swallowed past the lump in her throat. “I wouldn't force anyone to do anything they didn't want to do.”

Tahdaon grabbed her hard around the waist and drew her close so that she could feel his fully erect cock against her stomach. “Does it feel like I'm not willing?”

Cara placed her palms on his chest and looked up at him. Her heart beat wildly in her chest. She wanted to curse him for the power he had over her. It had been months since the first and only time he had been with her, and despite her attempt to erase the memory of his touch, it seemed that her attraction to him only increased the more time went by.

Fear stopped her from reacting. As much as she wanted him, she couldn't handle facing his rejection again. Not tonight. Not after everything that had happened.

“Why did you want me here?” he growled.

She bit her lip and quivered beneath the intensity of his dark gaze. When she managed to speak, her voice came out in a rasp. “I needed to forget.”

It was the truth. She knew that only he had the power to erase the images that haunted her. To take her mind off the tragic events that had occurred over the past week.

His eyes searched hers, and for a moment she thought he would pull away again. Instead, he lifted her in one swift motion and carried her to the bed. Laying her down on top of the blankets, she watched silently as he undressed. He pulled the linen shirt over his head, and Cara's mouth watered at the sight of his bared flesh.

As he stripped the remainder of his clothes, his gaze never faltered from her. With the elegance and power of a wild animal set on its prey, he crawled onto the bed and grasped the edges of her underdress, pulling it over her head.

He groaned deep in his chest as he looked at her, and Cara smiled to herself knowing that in that moment he wanted her. Needed her.

Before she knew what he was doing, he flipped her over on her stomach and opened her thighs with his knees. He grabbed her hair in one hand and pushed it over her shoulder, exposing her backside.

Pressing his body against hers, he leaned over and growled low in her ear, “Do you want this?”

“Yes,” she whimpered.

His cock nudged at her opening, but he didn't enter her. He nipped and licked at the delicate flesh beneath her ear and trailed his tongue over her shoulder. She squirmed beneath him, wanting him deep inside her.

The crack sounded before she could react, and she gasped at the sting of his palm across her bare ass.

“Tahdaon.” Her voice was a muffled sob against the pillow.

His tongue traced the line of her spine, his palm resting on the stinging flesh, his other hand cupping her wet mound. She bucked beneath him, needing more than he gave. His palm struck again, once, twice, pain mingled with pleasure. His fingers delved deep, opening her, preparing her body to receive him.

She whimpered in pleasure when he drove himself inside of her. She had never been taken from behind, and she shivered at the sensual brutality of it.

He pulled out, and just as she was about to protest, his palm slapped her ass as he drove deep inside once more. Groaning in pleasure, her hands fisted the sheets, and she held tight as he thrust hard. When her body erupted in pleasure, there was a violence to her climax that she had never experienced before.

He went still within her as her body recovered. She could feel his breath, hard and quick, against her cheek, and she knew he was holding onto his self-control by a thin thread, but instead of spending himself inside of her, he flipped her onto her back.

Nudging her thighs apart, he didn't hesitate to enter her, and she grasped hold of his hips as he buried himself deep, watching her with eyes the color of sapphires. The brown mote in his left eye glowed red in the fire's light, and Cara was awed at the power she saw reflected in his gaze.

“Tahdaon,” she whispered, running her hand up his chest and around his neck, drawing him downwards, so that his lips would meet hers.

His kiss was hesitant at first, tentative and wary, as if the very act took tore his very resolve from him, and then turned desperate, and he began to move in powerful strokes that matched his tongue's prodding.