Catch My Fall (14 page)

Shaking her head, Darby looked him dead in the eye and glared at him.  “They meant everything.  Go back into your house and live your life, Trace.  You’ll have the next four, and the four after that, racked up in no time and I just don’t want to be hurt anymore.  I’ll see you around.”

Sensing that
it was past time for Darby to get away from Trace, I leaned up and dropped a kiss on Tristan’s lips.  “I have to get her out of here.  This is too much for her to take.  Please get him away from the car so we can go.  Text me later.”

He nodded to show that he understood and I ran around the rear of the car to get into the passenger’s seat.  As I took my seat Tristan grabbed Trace’s arm and pulled him back from the car.  Trace tried to shake him off, but Tristan stood firm.  “You have to let her go,” he told him solemnly. 

Trace tried again to get closer to Darby’s window.  “You’ve got to be kidding!  You know that I can’t fucking let her go.  I can’t and I won’t, not fucking ever!”

Taking a deep breath Darby put one hand on the wheel and the other on the control to put the car into drive.  She didn’t even look at Trace when she said, “You really should have thought of that before.”

She pulled away then and I had to force myself not to look over my shoulder to see Tristan restraining Trace when he yelled, “I’m sorry,” and tried to run to the car.

Tears
rolled down Darby’s cheeks as she drove, but somehow she ignored him and kept right on driving.  Quite frankly, I was in awe of her inner strength.  Trace was clearly broken, but rather than making excuses for him or trying to fit into his life, Darby stuck up for herself.

Laying my hand on her shoulder, I squeezed it gently. “How about you pull over so I can drive
?”

Shaking her head firmly she said, “I’m still standing and dammit, I’m going to stay strong.  I can survive this.”

“It’s okay that it hurts, Darbs.  You just did something very, very difficult.  You’ve known Trace forever and although it’s clear he was just very upset, you stood up for yourself.  You’re strong as hell, but if you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m here.”

She sniffled softly as she wiped under her eyes before sitting up straight and focusing on the road in front of her.  “Enough about me, I need a diversion.  Spill and tell me why you called for a rescue.  Is something going on with you and Trist?”

I tried to get out of it by pointing out that she was upset and that the focus needed to be on her, but she was having none of that.  At her insistence, I spent the rest of the ride back to our dorm filling her in on everything that had gone on between Tristan and me since we met, but when she started to cry after pulling in and parking, I felt like the biggest bitch on earth for telling her that, today of all days. 

“I’m sorry Darby, I shouldn’t have…”

“No, Mia, no.  That’s not why I’m crying.  These are happy tears.  I’ve known Tristan forever and this is the first time he’s ever wanted someone badly enough to try at all.  I wasn’t aware that he even understood the concept and I am in total shock that he showed you his journal.  I know he writes in it every day but I’ve never gotten to read even one entry.  Knowing that he wrote about you… I’m happy for him and I’m happy for you.  Is there a part of me that wishes Trace would fight for me like that?  Of course!  But if anything, the fact that he never has even once in all of these years, but Tristan has put himself out there right away, is one more sign that we were never meant to be.  I could see someone like Brandon pulling out all the stops for me, but never Trace.”

Wiping at her eyes, she turned to me and started talking.  “Tristan’s had a very, very difficult life.  If it weren’t for my family, I shudder to think about what would have become of him and Trace.  I can’t tell you what his baggage is, only he can do that, but what I can tell you is that he’s got a metric fuck-ton of issues with his self-confidence.  You’d never know it to look at him or Trace, but their grandmother really did a number on them.  Just… be patient and gentle with him, okay?”

“I promise I will be.  You already know that I’m nothing like any of the other girls he’s had… ah…ya know… Ugh…Oh Christ, why can’t I say that?”

Smiling at me she answered, “That’d be because you care.”

Tristan texted me a few hours after I got back to my dorm, and I know I got a sappy smile on my face when I saw his name pop up on my screen. 

Tristan: Are you free to talk?

Me: Yep
—
Darby’s out and about so it’s just me.

My phone rang a few seconds later and I swiped the screen to answer.

“Hi, Stan.”

He laughed before answering, “Hi
, Mimi.”

I got such a huge charge from listening to his throaty chuckle that
it was actually weird.  I get what being turned on is for sure, and I’ve definitely gotten turned on before, but never the way I do with Tristan. The voice, the eyes, his scent, his body… oh yeah, all turn-ons.  Major.

“Did you eat dinner?”

“Meh.  I had a cup o’ noodles.  Does that count?”

“Uh, hell no that doesn’t count.  There’s like three freeze-dried vegetables in each cup and absolutely no protein.  I’m going to Salad Land.  You want me to pick you up?”

My stomach growled so loud that I’m surprised he didn’t hear it.  “Mm, I am all about Salad Land.  What time…”  My words were interrupted by a knock at my door.  “Hold on a sec, someone’s at the door.”

Swinging it open, I giggled like an idiot when I saw it was Tristan.  Pressing
end
on the call he came into my room and smiled at me.  “I was thinking now,” he said in answer to the question I’d only begun to ask before he knocked on the door.

Looking down I realized that
I was wearing a pair of yoga shorts paired with an old Maroon 5 concert t-shirt that was way too tight to wear in public, and my hair was done in two braids.  I couldn’t look less attractive if I tried, which was really pathetic because Tristan looked perfect as usual.

“
All right,” I said.  “I’m into going, but clearly I have to change and redo my hair.”

The look he gave me was butterfly inducing.  “You look awesome as usual, but I’m on board with you changing that shirt.  I don’t want anyone else seeing my girl looking so sexy.”

My mouth dropped as my heart began to race, and I couldn’t help the dorky smile that spread across my face.  Giggling nervously, I shoved at his stomach.  “You’re too much.  Now I’m going to grin like an idiot for hours.”

His response was to open his arms and pull me in for a hug.  “Good, I’m glad.  I want you to be happy when you’re with me.”

Wrapping my arms around him, I breathed in the sunshine and sea air scent that is Tristan Chamberlain and smiled because being with him made me feel normal.  Nothing could make me happier than that.  If things kept up the way they were, I thought he’d be seeing a lot of me smiling.

* * *

I’ve been at Tristan’s for six nights of the last ten.  We finished our puzzle and have now moved on to a really intense game of Monopoly.  We’re both crazy competitive and every night before I leave I take a picture of the board with my iPhone to make sure that he doesn’t cheat.  That makes Tristan laugh, and he says that he finds my silliness ‘endearing’.  No one’s ever said that about me before.

Surprisingly, Trace has been at home every night that I’ve been there.  Even the nights that he was teaching the self-defense classes, he came right home after and spent the night sitting on the couch watching ESPN. 

True to Tristan’s word, we’ve been taking things very slowly.  We spend time kissing every night and he holds my hand whenever possible, but we’ve both been really diligent about keeping things simple.  We’re getting closer each day though, and I feel so lucky to have found him. 

Tonight is the first class of a new session of his self-defense class.  It’s a four-week, eight-class session and Tristan asked me to take it. He’s been absolutely amazing and I’m excited that he wants me to take his class. I’m nervous-excited about it and I can’t wait to see what kind of teacher he is.  I can’t picture him being a harsh instructor, but considering what he’s teaching, maybe he has to be really tough. 

I’m all set up to Skype with my mom while I get ready for the class. She had a check-up earlier today and she’s going to fill me in on everything that happened.  She’s four months pregnant now, which means that she’s almost halfway through her pregnancy.  I’ve been trying to be upbeat when I talk to her and Neil, but in all honesty it makes me really sad that I’ll be so far away when the baby comes.  I’ve always dreamed about having a sibling and I’m so happy for my mom and Neil
, but I’m beside myself that I’m missing something so important. 

My computer chimed to alert me that she was calling me.  The timing was good because
I was just pulling my shirt over my head, and after getting it into place I dropped down in my desk chair and clicked to accept the Skype invite.

I smiled when I saw my Mom and Neil on the screen waving at me.

“Hi Mom, hi Neil!  How was the doctor?”

“The doctor was wonderful,” Mom said with a smile.  “Your baby brother or sister is just like you
—growing perfectly and without ever giving me even a second of morning sickness.  But that’s not the big news of the day!  We didn’t want to tell you until we were sure, but Neil and Uncle Jesse have decided to go into business together.  They’ve spent the last few weeks setting everything up and we anticipate being out there in about three months. You’ll be able to be at the hospital with us when the baby comes!”

“Uncle Jesse’s really going to move here too?”

“Yes he is.  He’s just as upset about you being gone as we are, and he also doesn’t want to be in this wretched town anymore.  He and Neil have actually talked a few times over the years about starting their own company; it was just never the right time.  Now, it is.  Isn’t this great news, honey?”

I was crying so hard that I couldn’t do anything but nod like a bobble-head.  I’ve missed my mom, Neil and my Uncle Jesse so much, and it’s been so hard to maintain a façade for her as if the distance doesn’t drive me crazy.  Because
I was crying, my mom started to cry too, which of course left Neil to calm us both down.

“Now, now… both of you stop crying or else you’ll make me blubber like a fool.  I want to see my girls smiling over this great news.”

Sniffling quietly, I grabbed a tissue and dabbed at my eyes.  “Trust me, I’ll be smiling from here on out.  I am so excited I could sing!”

We talked for a few more minutes, until I noticed that it was getting close to the time I would need to leave for Tristan’s class.

“I hate to cut you guys off but Tristan asked me to take this session of self-defense classes and it starts in less than half an hour.”

They exchanged a look that I couldn’t miss.  “
All right,” I said, “What’s with the look?”

My mom tried to talk but she was choked up and couldn’t get anything out, so she turned to Neil and nodded before gesturing to the screen.

“Your mom and I are so happy that you’re dating, honey.  We were worried that it would take you years to be able to even try to trust someone enough to even consider dating.  Mom and I can’t wait to meet him when we move to town.”

Kissing two of my fingers, I held them up to the camera on my computer.  “I love you both so much.  It’s because of you two, Uncle Jesse…and I guess my shrink that I’ve gotten this far.  I can’t wait for you to meet him, either!”

After saying goodbye to them both, I turned my computer off and left to go to the gym.  As usual Darby was MIA, which meant that she was at Brandon’s frat house.  She might be fooling Brandon, she may even be fooling herself, but I know for sure that she’s not as into him as she says she is.  The other night I woke up from a nightmare to find that she had fallen asleep sitting up in her bed with a framed picture of her and Trace clutched in her hand.  The tracks of her tears were still visible on her cheeks and I felt horrible for her… and for Trace.  No matter what he’s done in the past, I really think that he knows now that he was wrong.  I wanted to tell her that he was sitting at home staring at walls, but when I tried to bring him up, she shut me right down. 

I got to the gym a few minutes early and after signing in with Colin at the front desk I headed for the workout room that Tristan’s class is in. He turned to me with a smile as I walked into the room and held out his hand to me, waiting for me to cross the room to him.

Just seeing him like this, with a smile on his face and his hand reaching for me, is enough to make me a sappy mess.  Even before the incident, I never saw this for myself.  I don’t know how I got so lucky, but I’m determined not to screw it up with my fears.  Heading straight for him, I took his hand in mine and smiled up at him as he tugged me into him for a quick kiss.

When he pulled back, he rubbed at the bottom of my lower lip with his thumb as he stared at me.  “I missed you today, Mimi.  You ready to kick my ass tonight?”

Shaking my head, I tilted my chin and gently nipped at his thumb.  “I don’t know if I’ve got it in me to do any ass kicking, Stan.”

He threw back his head and
laughed out loud.  “I don’t know about that.  You kick my ass plenty, even if you don’t know it.”

Before I could ask him what he meant, girls started coming into the room for the class.  When I went to pull away from him, he gestured to a spot right in front of the room.  “I know you don’t love being right in the front, but I expect you to be right there, Mimi.  My best girl, my cheerleader and my star student all rolled into one.  If you’re really good, I’ll give you a treat after class.”

I blushed and giggled like a fool, but I took the spot in the front of the class.  When everyone was in the room, Tristan introduced himself and began talking about the importance of self-defense, particularly in a college community.  He taught us about the power of saying NO and speaking up if something is wrong.  Against my will, I started to tense up when he spoke about drunk girls being taken advantage of and he talked a lot about how vital it was to have a sober friend and to never, ever, ever put your cup down or take a drink from anyone that you don’t know or don’t trust.  The points that he was making were all spot on and I wished that I’d had someone like him around to tell me all of this years ago.

When it came time to get to the physical portion of the class, he pulled me forward for a demonstration.  “This is my girl, Mia.  Mia is a first-timer like the rest of you and today I’m going to let her try to hurt me.  I’m sure it will be hysterical, but make sure to pay close attention.”

My heart was beating so fast from him calling me his girl that it’s a wonder it didn’t run out of my chest and do a victory lap around the room.  Most of the girls smiled at me as I turned to face the class, but there were a few that straight up glared at me.

Grabbing my arm gently he turned to the class and explained that he wanted me to try to get away from him.  Instinctively I tried to pull my arm back, but that didn’t work at all.  Instead he was able to pull me closer to him. 

“When you yanked your arm toward you, you actually made it easier for me to come forward.  This time when I grab your arm, yank your arm up fast.  Work against my thumb to get out of the hold.”

I did what he said, and this time my arm came right out of his hold.  I smiled at him like a complete moron because I was so proud of myself. 

“There are other ways to get out of a hold if that doesn’t work,” he explained.  “Next up, we’re going to be trying a wrist sweep.  I’m going to quickly show you how it’s done and then I’ll practice it on Mia.”

He showed me the wrist sweep technique twice before letting me do it to him, and I beamed with pride when I did it just like he taught me.  Why had no one suggested self-defense classes to me before?  Knowledge is power, and I
already felt stronger just for knowing how to actually defend myself.

After I’d done it, he had all of the students come up one at a time to try both techniques on him.  There were eleven other girls in all and most were fine but I was repulsed by four of the girls who went out of their way to shove their boobs in his face when they got to work with him.  I could never be so forward with someone I d
idn’t know, but watching them behave like that filled in all the blanks for me about how easy it was for Tristan to find willing partners who didn’t care that he wasn’t ever going to commit.  As grossed out as I was by the idea of meaningless hook-ups, I had to admit that if I was in that frame of mind, Tristan Chamberlain was the kind of guy that could entice me to bend my rules.  I was just glad I didn’t have to.  As I stood and watched, he looked over the shoulder of one of the girls that had her boobs in his face and rolled his eyes at me.  Nothing major but enough that I saw it and knew that he wasn’t feeling the girl at all.

The last move of the day was actually a preview of the next class.  I listened to instructions and crisscrossed my arms against my chest and then Tristan came behind me and tried to grab me.  He walked me through breaking the hold and stomping down on the ins
tep of his foot, and then he walked me through breaking the hold and elbowing him in the gut.  It was actually fun and I was really getting into it. I was laughing when class ended.

After he said goodbye to everyone I sat down on one of the mats against the wall while he began resetting the room for the next instructor.