Catch My Fall (21 page)

Growling down at me he instructed me to use my finger to play with my clit.  I blushed like an idiot and he shook his head.  “If you think touching yourself is something to be embarrassed about, you couldn’t be more wrong.  I’m going to fucking lose it when I see your fingers touching it.  You’re so goddamn sexy.  Do it, baby.”

Something about him took away the shame and the fear.  Sliding my hand down to center, I began making little circles on my clit.  Each pass made me clench against him as he slid in and out, and I could feel myself approaching another orgasm. 

“Fuck, yeah baby.  You’re going to come again! I can’t believe it.  This is perfect.  Do it baby, come for me.”

Pressing down on myself I came with a wail that turned into a yell of wonder as he thrust past the barrier.  I was mid orgasm and my brain didn’t know whether to process the pain or continue coming, and because I was already in the throes of it, I just continued coming.  I felt the pain and the pressure, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.  As I came down from my orgasm, he stayed still and let me adjust to his size. 

Eventually I could feel him twitching inside of me and I gasped when he began thrusting in and out again.  I was shocked to find that I liked it, a lot, and I grabbed his ass as he really began to work himself in and out. 

“Oh, oh! Oh, Tristan! That’s good!”

“Best ever,” he panted as he thrust harder.  I spread my legs wider and held onto him as he pushed in and out, the muscles in his ass flexing as he worked.  He attacked my mouth ferociously as he picked up speed and we kissed wet and messy as we both started to shake.  Both of us were sweating now and I moaned when he slid against my painfully swollen nipples.

“Mia, fingers, your clit.  Now.  I’m going to go.  Hurry.”

This time I didn’t argue, instead burying my fingers between my legs and working my clit as his thrusting took on a manic quality.  Watching him made me crazy wet and I bucked underneath him as I moaned and shivered. 

“I’m coming… Oh god, Tristan! Don’t stop, don’t stop!  Baby! I’m coming!”

Throwing back his head he yelled as he started coming. “FUCK! MIA! AHHH!”

I knew that Darby and Trace had to have heard him, but I didn’t care because I was too busy crying tears of happiness.  

Darby and I have both been staying at Tristan and Trace’s, and it’s really nice.  We’re like one big happy family and I couldn’t be more excited. 

Darby has pointed out more than once that I’ve got a perpetual smile on my face, and she’s been teasing me and saying that it’s because I’m on an orgasm high.  Not to be outdone, I pointed out that she’s also smiling like it’s her job and that judging by the sounds coming from their room, she’s on her very own orgasm high.  The first time I said it to her she threw a donut at me before she burst out laughing and admitted that I was right.

It’s been three days since I texted Macy’s mom and I haven’t heard a word back, which is upsetting me.  I’ve talked to Tristan about it a dozen times and he’s keeping me calm by pointing out that Macy is going through a serious life change and she just needs some time.

We were cuddled up on the couch watching
Modern Family
when my cell phone rang.  Seeing that it was Macy’s mom, I answered it with shaking hands.

“Hi Mary.”

I was shocked when Macy’s breathless voice answered.  “It’s me. I’m sorry that I didn’t let her text you back right away.  I was confused and embarrassed that you knew, but I need you now. Can you come to the hospital?”

“Now?”

“My water just broke and I want you with me.  I should’ve understood the whole time that you could help me make the decision.  Will you come?”

“I’ll leave now and I’ll be there as soon as I can.  I love you!”

“Love you too!”

Jumping off the couch I grabbed my shoes as I explained to Tristan that I was going.  I could tell that he was uncomfortable with the fact that I was going to Choices, but he was supportive anyway. 

“Do you want me to drive you?”

“No, stay here.  I’ll call you as soon as I know anything.  I love you.”

Hugging me tightly he kissed me.  “I love you too, Mimi.”

It took me forty-five minutes to get to Choices, and when I got there Macy’s dad was waiting for me in the lobby.  Taking me down a maze of hallways, he guided me to the labor and delivery area as he explained that Macy had the choice of having the baby in the hospital or at Choices with a midwife, and she had chosen the midwife.  “She didn’t want drugs because she didn’t want the baby to be drugged.  Her mother and I are hoping that means she wants to keep the baby, but I just don’t know what to think,” he told me.

I didn’t know what to think either, and I was largely silent as he walked me through the process of washing my hands before pointing to a door that he said was Macy’s room.  Opening the door I found myself looking at my best friend for the first time in forever.  Emotion overtook me as I ran to the bed and threw my arms around her neck and kissed her.  Her mom was in the room with her and I hugged her next.  When we finished our greetings, she quietly left the room so that Macy and I could talk. 

Macy hugged me again tightly as she apologized for keeping her pregnancy a secret, and it was several minutes of hugging and crying before I sat down next to her and we got to really talking.  It was surreal to see her with a big swollen belly, and I could actually see her stomach spasming when she had contractions. Macy has always been anti-pain, and I couldn’t believe that she was going to have a baby without drugs.

“Do you know what you’re having?”

Shaking her head, she wiped at the tear that escaped her eye.  “This whole time I’ve been scared to attach to the baby so I didn’t want to know.  When I figured out that I was pregnant, I was already out of my first trimester.  I freaked out, Mia.  I just totally freaked out.  Any progress that I had been making was gone.  I wanted an abortion but then I didn’t, and I wasn’t sure how I could live with myself either way.”

She stopped talking as another wave of contractions struck, and I held her hand and told her what a great job she was doing as she breathed through it.  I was in awe that my pain-fearing best friend was enduring this.  When the contractions were finished for the moment, she went back to her story.

“One of my therapists back home told my mom about Choices and after we talked about it for a while, we agreed that I needed to be here. I was ashamed to tell you and I’ve spent the last few months just trying to figure out what I want to do.”

I was pretty sure I already knew what she was going to do.  The answer was in the fact that she wouldn’t take drugs to blunt the pain and that she was rubbing her belly softly.  Macy wanted to keep her baby.

“My parents are supportive either way.  What do you think I should do, Mia?”

Squeezing her hand encouragingly, I used my free hand to push her hair back from her face.  “I think that the decision is yours and I support you either way.  But if you’re asking if I think that it’s okay to love your baby in spite of the way it was conceived, the answer is yes.”

Closing her eyes, she was silent as her lips trembled and she tried to control her emotions.  Before she could say anything else another series of contractions happened, and when they stopped she went right back to talking.

“I’m scared that the baby will be like Brady or Chad.”

“No! Macy, no! The baby is nothing like either one of them.  No matter which one of them is the biological father this baby has nothing to do with them.  This baby is yours if you want it to be.  No matter what you decide to do, he or she will be nothing like those assholes.”

Clasping my hand tightly she looked at me pleading eyes.  “Do you think it’s weird or wrong that I love something that came from that night?”

“What I think is that you’ve got a miracle inside of you.  You’ve got a big heart Macy; of course you love your baby.  We will all love this baby and there’s nothing weird or wrong about that.”

Another wave of contractions came, and they were definitely getting closer together.  When she could talk again she nodded at me.  “I want to keep my baby but I don’t even have a name yet… I was too afraid to admit that I wanted to keep her.”

“Her?”

She gave a nod as she wiped away tears.  “I think I’m having a little girl.”

Taking a deep breath she softly said, “Can you get my mom so I can tell her?”

I walked quickly into the hallway to find Mary, and found her right away because she was outside the door talking to a woman wearing scrubs.  Mary was facing the door so she stopped talking to the nurse right away when she saw me.

“Is she okay?”

Nodding firmly I assured her that Macy was fine.  “She’s doing good, but she wants to talk to you.  She’s made her decision.”

Mary looked scared and my heart started to beat faster as I wondered if maybe she didn’t want Macy to keep the baby.  Stepping away from the nurse she grabbed my hand.  “Please… you need to tell me before I go in there so I know how to react.  Is she keeping the baby or giving it up?”

Swallowing past the lump in my throat I whispered, “She’s keeping it.”

Sagging into me, Mary hugged me tightly.  “Oh thank God.”

After we got back into the room and Macy confirmed to her mom that she was keeping the baby, things seemed to pick up speed. Mary left the room to tell Macy’s dad the happy news and she came back a few minutes later to tell us that he was thrilled. Less than half an hour later Macy was in what they said was a birthing tub, with her mom clutching one hand while I held the other.  The midwife was in the water coaching her and I watched in absolute awe as Macy followed the instructions perfectly.  I had expected her to be screaming in agony, but she held it all in, only letting out quiet grunts and groans. 

“I… don’t… want… my baby… to hear… me screaming.”

She amazed me with her strength as the minutes stretched into an hour.  Finally it was time for her to really push and the room was abuzz with activity as other assistants came in to help the midwife.  Bearing down, Macy followed all of the midwife’s instructions and within ten minutes she was pushing for the final time.

When the midwife lifted the baby up and out of the water, my jaw dropped.  I heard someone saying that it was a girl, but I couldn’t take my eyes off this beautiful and perfect child that was so clearly not Brady or Chad’s.  They’re white as can be, but Macy’s ex-boyfriend Steve was African-American and there is no doubt that this caramel colored little girl came from him.

“Oh my God,” Macy sobbed.  “Oh my God! I never thought… She’s Steve’s.  We used condoms!  I can’t believe… She’s a miracle.”

Macy cried in wonder as she held the beautiful little girl that she had brought into the world against her chest.  “Even when I thought she was Brady’s or Chad’s I loved her.  She had my heart no matter who fathered her…it wouldn’t have mattered.”

I know that it wouldn’t have mattered, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t relieved for the baby that she wasn’t going to have to deal with the same feelings and emotions that Tristan and Trace have had to.

I fell head over heels in love with that little girl when Macy’s mom settled her into my arms, and I cried like a baby when Macy announced that she was naming the baby after the world’s best aunt and grandmother.  In addition to being perfect and beautiful, Mia Mary Evans smelled heavenly and I inhaled her baby scent again and again with a smile on my face.

Just over nine months after Brady and Chad had altered the course of our lives forever, Macy and I were both smiling and happy to be alive.  I cried tears of joy that I had my best friend back.

* * *

I fell asleep in a recliner in Macy’s room and didn’t wake up for a few hours.  After spending some more time with baby Mia, I left to make the drive back to Tristan’s.  I’d been texting with him since I had left his house last night and when I told him that I was going to be back soon, he assured me that a McDonald’s Egg McMuffin and an orange juice would be waiting for me.

I burst into tears when I read the note that he’d left next to the food on the table.

Beautiful girl

I’m so proud that you’re mine

You’re the definition of strength and beauty

You caught my fall and saved me from myself

Just by being you

You’re my gift

And I will treasure you

You’re all I want
to see

You’re all I want to taste

You’re all I want to feel

Only you

Just you

Just. You.

He hugged and kissed me deeply after I stopped crying about how beautiful what he had written was, and then we ate breakfast.  Actually, he ate and I inhaled.  After we ate he carried me to his bedroom where he got me undressed and put me into one of his t-shirts to sleep in.  Laying me down gently on the bed, he curled up like a spoon behind me and held me as I filled him in on everything that had happened over the course of the night.

“Will she tell this Steve guy that he’s got a daughter?”

“She will but she doesn’t know how he’s going to take it and she isn’t sure that she even wants him involved, so she’s not going to list him on the birth certificate.  Steve was a real asshole to her and I can’t help but blame him for what happened that night.  His screwing with Macy’s head as badly as he did is what sent her over the edge and made her so desperate to blunt the pain.  It’s not my decision though; it’s hers.  Honestly, he’s kind of an asshole and I don’t know how he’s even going to feel when he finds out that he has a daughter.  It could go either way, really.  He may want to know her, or he may not.  Either way, Macy says she’s fine with whatever comes.  She’s got baby Mia now and she says that’s all she really cares about.”

“That’s good.  The world could use more people like Macy.  I can’t wait to meet her and the baby.”

My heart warmed and I swallowed past tears.  “I love you.”

“I love you too, baby.”

Relaxing in his embrace, I fell asleep with an enormous smile on my face because evil didn’t win.