Chaos (7 page)

Tracie

I wake up in the morning and for a second the heavy arm draped over me makes me panic. Then last night comes back to me. I can’t believe after all this time I finally gave in to him, not that I regret it.

Being with Torch last night felt right. Lying in his arms right now feels like home, like I’m right where I was always supposed to be.  I pushed him away because he was too familiar to me, reminded me too much of the life I’ve been living. I think that is what will make us amazing. The fact that we can understand and relate to each other better than anyone else who has never been in our shoes. I’m sure the girls will be thrilled considering they have been on my ass about how dumb I was for constantly pushing him away.

His arm tightens around me. “You thinking about whether to run?”

I turn toward him. “Nope.”

“Good, ’cause after last night there is no way I’m letting you get away.” He kisses me and I let myself get lost in his kiss.

That’s when the sound of a ringing phone slices through our peaceful morning. Torch groans as he unwraps himself from me and fishes his phone out of his jeans. He stands up and I don’t hide the fact that I am blatantly ogling his ass. He winks at me with a smile before pulling on his briefs and answering the phone.

“Yeah…how the hell would I have known she would go pyro?” He looks back at me and I laugh. “I took care of it…we won’t hear from him…She’s here…yeah, man, later.” He turns toward me. “Shooter wasn’t too amused with your little fire show last night.” Shaking his head, he walks over to his dresser.

I look down at the floor realizing all I have to get changed into is that damn dress. The thing is so tight and has absolutely no appeal to me right now. Something hits me in the face and I look down to see one of Torch’s T-shirts.

“Figured that little red number was a little less appealing right now.”

“Thanks.” I smile at him. Pulling the shirt on it comes down almost to mid-thigh. Jesus. I stand in front of his mirror wondering what the hell I could do to fix this. Spotting a rubber band on his dresser I grab it knotting the shirt on the side, wrapping the band around it before tucking the knot under. This little T-shirt dress is definitely my best option right now until I can get back to my room.

Shit.

I’m going to have to walk through the clubhouse dressed like this and they’ll all know why.

“Doesn’t matter if you’re wearing my shirt or not, by the end of today everyone will know you’re mine.”

I look over to see him in the doorway. “How the hell do you always do that?”

“Do what?” He shrugs.

“Read my mind and answer a question I haven’t even asked.”

He walks behind me, his hands wrapping around me, the two of us staring at our reflection. “Because I have spent so long waiting for you that I probably know you better than you know yourself.”

I relax against him. I love when he says stuff like that; when he isn’t just the tough as nails biker. Don’t get me wrong though, the biker is definitely what drew me to him.

“We need to go.” He presses a kiss against my neck.

I follow him out to his bike.

The ride to the clubhouse was more nerve-wracking this time.

I was showing up as an old lady.

This was going to completely change my role in the club. I couldn’t help but wonder if the boys were going to treat me differently because of it. The big difference between me and the other girls was that they never really had to worry about me repeating anything. There seems to be an old lady pact, like they all stick together, but I don’t want them thinking that I’m going to change now.

The club was my family and family always came first.

Torch turns the engine off on his bike and I hesitate before I get off. After a minute I finally get off his bike. He follows me and then takes my hand. “It’s not gonna be half as hard as you think.”

I follow him hoping that he’s right as I try to straighten out my makeshift dress. We open the clubhouse door to see everyone hanging around. Cheers sound once they see us, I even hear Twisted screaming, “It’s about damn time.” I let go of Torch’s hand and head toward my room, needing to be out of this weird spotlight and in some real clothes.

My door isn’t even closed for a minute when Lucy and Nikki open it and come walking in.

“You could have knocked. I’m getting changed here.”

“Yeah, well, if you thought running to your room was gonna work you are seriously delusional.” Nikki sits down on my bed and Lucy follows. “Spill.”

“There’s nothing to say.” I shrug.

“Bullshit. We have been waiting for you to come to your senses for years, now I need to at least hear about how it happened.” She crosses her arms over her chest letting me know that there is no way she is dropping this.

“Fine. I went to Randy’s last night and Torch, of course, followed me there. Once I walked in his house, I found the bastard cheating on me.” Their mouths drop open. “Yup, so I grabbed all the bastard’s expensive suits took ’em to the backyard and set his shit on fire.”

They both explode in laughter. “What did he do?” Lucy finally manages to ask.

“He came out and tried to act like a big man then Torch stormed into the backyard acting like the normal caveman we see on a daily basis and I think Randy almost shit himself.” This time I laugh with them as I remember Randy’s face when Torch threw him onto the ground.

“Then?” Nikki arches her eyebrow at me. She isn’t going to let me off the hook until she gets the good stuff.

“Then, he took me back to his house and we had sex, you nosy whore.” I shake my head at her, as I get dressed.

“Hey, that’s all I was looking for. Can I just say it’s about damn time though?”

I turn around throwing a shirt at her face.

“I agree, but can I be selfish for a minute?” We both look over at her. “Guys, Jordan’s mom comes in today and I’m freaking out.” I turn to look at Lucy and she is twirling her hair and biting her lip.

“Why? It’s not like you’ve never met her before or that she’s some crazy person.” I turn toward her leaning against the dresser.

“I know that but with the wedding and the baby, I’ve been so stressed lately and she always wants to help.” She shakes her head.

I laugh. “What a bitch.”

Lucy narrows her eyes at me. “You know what I mean. I just don’t want to end up snapping on her because—” A knock cuts Lucy’s sentence off.

“It’s open!” I yell.

Whip opens the door. “Hey, Luce, my mom just got here.”

“K, be there in a minute.” He leaves and then she turns to us. “Come keep me from saying anything stupid.”

Nikki holds her hands up. “Hey, I’m not a miracle worker.”

“Shut up.” Lucy shoots her a glare that would even keep me quiet.

We head out to the main room to see Jordan’s mom talking to all the boys. She’s about as tall as us, brown hair, and full of smiles. The guys love her because whenever she is here she spoils them. She calls herself the club mom, and treats them all like they are five years old.

Once she sees Lucy her face lights up and she rushes over to her. “Hi, dear! How is my little grandbaby?”

“Fine, just taking it day by day.” She forces a smile. Poor Lucy, after watching her and Nikki it amazes me why anyone would ever want to be pregnant. I’m perfectly happy playing with the kids then handing them back once they start being bad.

“Did you decorate the nursery yet? I wanted to bring stuff, but I didn’t know what your colors were or if Jordan would want all leather.” Nikki lets out a laugh, while Lucy takes a deep breath. “You won’t let him decorate the room black, right?”

I squeeze Luce’s side where I know she’s ticklish to force a smile before the pregnancy hormones swallow the club mom.

“No, we haven’t really decorated much yet,” she says half laughing. She looks at me giving me a silent thank you.

“You know what, I really need Lucy’s opinion with some things, do you mind if I steal her?” Nikki asks.

“Oh no you go right ahead.” Whip’s mom smiles before the two of them almost run out of the door.

I walk over to the bar and grab a beer needing to relax a little.

“So you finally gave in, huh?” I turn to see Shooter standing behind me.

“Yeah.” I take a drink not really knowing what to say to him.

“You know I’ll support whatever you want, Trace. I love you. I just want you to be happy.” He looks over at me.

I give him a hug. “I know. You’ve been there for me ever since I lost my parents. You’ve basically been my second dad and I can’t thank you enough for that.”

“Yeah, well you deserve so much more. Hopefully you finally found someone to give it to you.” He nods behind me and I turn to see Torch watching us. “I’ll always be here for you, Trace.”

“I know, Shooter, and it means more than you’ll ever know.” I give him another hug before walking over to Torch. “So, now what?”

He smiles at me before leaning down close to my ear. “I need to get some shit done here then I wanna take you back to my place and make you scream even louder than you did last night.”

My breath hitches.

He places a kiss on my cheek before walking over to Twisted and Whip.

I have a feeling that getting involved with Torch will be the ride of my life.

Tracie

While I would love to throw Lucy a wild bachelorette party, that is obviously not able to happen. The boys are taking Whip out while we have a wild sleepover night at Lucy’s with movies and popcorn planned.

“You know, Mary, only you would make it so your bachelorette party had to be innocent.” I wink at Lucy laughing because I know how much she hates that nickname.

“Whatever, maybe it’s better this way because God knows what you would have gotten me into if I weren’t pregnant. The boys probably would have ended up needing to bail us out of jail.” She shakes her head.

“Yeah, but that’s how you know you had an amazing bachelorette party.” I wink at her again.

Someone knocks at the door and I get up grabbing the cash for the pizzas that we ordered. “Luce, this shit smells disgusting,” I say as I walk in with the stack of boxes. “I had to explain to the poor guy that you were pregnant just so he didn’t think I was some freak.”

“Yeah, well you try ignoring a craving. It feels like you might go insane if you don’t get it. Blame the baby.”

I crouch down next to her big belly. “You better not want me to make you stuff like this when you come out, little one.” I set the two normal pizzas down in one spot and put Lucy’s box by itself. “Normal people on the right, psycho pregnant women on the left.”

She crosses her arms like she isn’t going to go get a piece but we both know that’s a lie. After a minute, she’s at the box grabbing a piece of her scrambled egg anchovy pizza. I mentally gag just thinking about it. I swear to God I will never eat shit like that when I’m pregnant.

Whoa.

When I’m pregnant?

Where the hell did that come from?

I’ve never thought about being pregnant, even when Nikki was going through it. It’s Torch, the man is completely screwing me up. I don’t know how someone can possibly consume every single one of my thoughts the way that he does. It’s insane. When he’s around I can’t help but smile and when he isn’t all I want to do is talk to him. I sound like one of those lovesick idiots that I used to shake my head at. Even now, when I’m supposed to be having a good time with the girls, I want to text him.

I need a damn intervention.

Usually when a guy claims a girl, she goes and gets her property patch tattooed on, but I haven’t made my appointment yet. I’m not really sure why I’m putting it off. I guess because it’s so permanent. That’s why the guys take claiming a girl so serious, because it comes with a lot of expectations and commitment.

I never would have seen myself here a few months ago; hell, I wouldn’t have even seen myself here a month ago. I fought for so long to not be a part of this life as an old lady that the idea of the patch tattoo freaks me out.

“Hello! Earth to Tracie!” I look over to see Lucy and Nikki looking at me. “You join the land of the living again, girl? Come on and let’s start the movie before preggers gets tired and falls asleep.”

We start to laugh, as Lucy’s face gets red. She stands up almost knocking over the plate her pizza is on. “Listen, bitches, stop picking on me! It’s my bachelorette, I’m as big as the Titanic, I’m eating a pizza with fish and eggs on it, and I can’t even get drunk. The next one of you whores who cracks a joke will be sorry because I will sit on top of you and suffocate you with my whale of a body.” She slams down on the couch before picking up her plate and taking a bite of her pizza.

I hold my breath and bite my lip trying everything in my power not to laugh. Nikki leans over and whispers in my ear. “Baby rage, the struggle is real.”

I lose it, bursting out in laughter. I’m laughing so hard that there isn’t even any noise coming out of my mouth. I’m just starting to catch my breath when something hits me right in the face. I open my eyes to see a piece of Lucy’s pizza sitting in front of me. “Did you just throw the pizza from hell at my face?”

“Yep, and trust me when I say you don’t want to see what comes next.” She pushes play on the remote before turning away from me.

Pregnant women are no joke when they are pissed off. I decide to stop poking fun at Lucy for the rest of the night, fearing for my life.

***

Today is Lucy’s wedding, and I couldn’t be happier for her. With everything she and Whip have been through they deserve this. She woke up this morning and started running around like a crazy person. All she kept saying was how her hair hated her life, and that no amount of makeup could fix what the baby stole from her for the past six months.

I look over at Nikki. “Should we try to help?”

“I don’t know. I’m kinda scared if I get in her way she’ll run me over. Maybe we just wait for instructions, like good little soldiers.” She shrugs her shoulders.

“Agreed. After last night I have no doubt that she’ll resort to violence if provoked.”

Lucy runs by us again but comes to a quick stop. “What are you two whispering about?”

I swear she has these crazy eyes, and it’s scary. It’s a mixture of the worst bridezilla’s episode mixed with a caged animal at feeding time.

“Nothing,” we say at the same time.

“Yeah, like I buy that. Do we have any food? Other than that disgusting pizza I had last night.” She scrunches her face.

The disgusting pizza that she ate five slices of. I swear I will never understand pregnant women. She loved that shit last night.

“I can go grab something,” I volunteer eager to get out of the house.

She nods before telling me what she wants. I ask Nikki if she wants anything and she gives me a death glare. She’s just jealous that she didn’t come up with an exit strategy first.

I practically run out of the house, giving a nod to the prospect as he gets on his bike to follow me. My phone rings on the drive over to the store and I smile when I see that it’s Torch.

“Hey, I didn’t think you guys would be up this early.” I can’t help the huge smile on my face, but I’m glad he can’t see it.

“Yeah, well unfortunately Lucy wanted this shit to be early so it’s not like we had a choice.” His voice sounds groggy, like he just woke up. The wedding is at noon so the guys need to be at the church by eleven.

“At least you don’t have to deal with a rage filled pregnant woman with a newfound appreciation for throwing things.” I laugh.

“Yeah, Whip was saying how he has had to learn how to duck lately.” I hear the jingling of his belt in the background. “You miss me last night?” His voice goes deeper and I swear it somehow goes right to my core.

I did, but there is no way I want to admit that to him. “No, actually it was a nice vacation.”

“See I’d believe you, if your voice didn’t get all shaky and you didn’t pause the way you did. As much as you might want to deny it, you’re as addicted to me as I am to you. You can also bet that tonight I’m going to be making up for lost time.” I hear some of the boys in the background. “I gotta go, babe. I’ll see you later though.”

I say goodbye to him and think about how he is right. I really did miss him last night. It isn’t just that missed sex either. I missed having him around, talking to him, just being in his presence. In such a short time Torch has become a necessity for me. He feels like home.

I get back to the house with the food and I swear Lucy almost tackles me when I walk in.

“Girl, I thought she was gonna resort to cannibalism if you didn’t get here soon.” Nikki laughs and shakes her head.

Lucy basically inhales her food before grabbing the curling iron she had heating up.

“Need any help, Ma-Lucy?” I almost called her Mary; at this point I might have to dodge a burning iron being flung at my face.

Her eyes narrow at me because she knows what I was about to call her. “No, this horse mane is hard enough for me to try and tame.” She huffs before turning around and starting to curl her hair.

Nikki and I make ourselves scarce getting ready in the other room and basically staying clear of hurricane Lucy.

After an hour she comes into the room hair and makeup looking beautiful, a smile finally on her face. “I’m sorry I’ve been so crazy. The stress of the wedding mixed with all the pregnancy hormones has made me nutso lately.”

I smile at her. “Well, you look beautiful. You ready to get your dress on and marry that man?”

She nods with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on her face. We help Lucy into her dress and I breathe a sigh of relief when it zips up with no problem. Everyone goes out and gets into my car, and we are finally on our way to the church.

“You know from the moment you walked into the club we all knew that the two of you would be together. That boy was hooked from day one. I have to say though I enjoyed him having to sit around and wait till you were eighteen.” Lucy and I laugh. Jordan used to watch her like a hawk and all the brothers knew she was off limits years before he ever claimed her. “Three years that man waited for you. If that isn’t dedication, I don’t know what is.”

“Oh yeah?” Nikki looks over at me from the passenger seat. “How long did you keep Torch waiting again?”

“That’s totally different. I never thought that we would ever get together.”

“Yeah, sure.” Everyone laughs as we pull up to the church.

We walk in through the back entrance so that Whip doesn’t see Lucy. Shooter is walking her down the aisle because, just like with me, he is basically like a father to her. We meet him at the front of the church.

“All of you girls look beautiful.” He gives us all a soft smile that is rare coming from him. He turns to Lucy. “You ready for this, darlin’? If you’re havin’ second thoughts I can drive the getaway car.”

She nudges his arm. “Shut up.”

The piano start to play and Nikki steps into the open doorway so she can make her way down the aisle. After a few beats I follow her, my eyes immediately finding Torch standing at the front with Whip. His eyes lock on mine and they follow me the entire way up the aisle.

The music changes to the wedding march and everyone stands up. When Lucy steps into view, I look over at Whip. His face holds so much love for her and I can’t stop the smile on my face. They have waited so long for this day and to be here and be a part of it makes me so happy.

Lucy wanted a traditional ceremony so the preacher runs through all of the traditional wedding elements. As they say their vows, Lucy’s voice shakes a few times with emotion, and as much as I don’t want them to my eyes fill with tears.

When we all hear the preacher say, “I now pronounce you man and wife,” the church erupts in cheers and applause. I meet Torch at the center of the aisle and walk down with him as we exit the church.

Once we pass the door his arms wrap around me. “You look gorgeous.” His lips are on mine, it’s soft but at the same time so powerful. “I need to run an errand for Shooter.  Can you ride over with one of the boys?”

I nod.

He kisses me again and I lean into him. He pulls back looking me up and down. “I wish I didn’t have to go. I’ll be quick though.” He gives me another quick kiss before heading down the steps.

I grab a ride with Nikki and Twisted.

I can’t wait till he gets back.

I want to be in his arms.

Today will be an amazing day.