Choices (24 page)

             
“Um, where is your jacket Tyler?” He gets it out of the back seat and puts it on, then starts jumping up and down.

             
“Okay, are you ready? You look like you won a million dollars. I’ve never seen a kid so anxious. Well, maybe Maddie but he has even her beat.”

             
“I’m ready. I’m ready. Let’s go.”

             
At the ticket booth, I pull out my wallet and Carter gives me a confused look. “What are you doing?” He asks.

             
“I’m getting my money out.” I’m a little confused by his confusion to be honest.

             
“No, you’re not. Put your wallet away.” I gape at him. “Gracie, please put your money away. I got this.”

             
“Like hell you do. I’m paying for Tyler and myself.” Even though I am not riding on any rides. I guess I can find something else to do, besides reading my pregnancy book and listening to my music. It might be the perfect time to start liking arcade games.

             
“No, let me.” He argues.

             
“Over my dead body.” I find it odd that I am arguing with him about this, but it’s kind of making me giggle inside. He doesn’t relent.

             
“It would be cheaper.” I glare at him.

             
“Come on Carter, that’s a lot of money. Let me help.” I notice people gathering around us like it’s some kind of show we’re putting on.

             
“I got it. I was saving it up since I thought of the idea. You need the money for the baby.” I hear a woman behind me say, “That is a very thoughtful young man. I would take his advice.” I turn around, feeling embarrassed. But finally cave. I smile at her. She’s an older lady with dark hair and brown eyes, maybe in her forties.

             
“Are you sure?” I ask one last time.

             
“Can we go please??” Tyler begs, glancing between Carter and me.

             
“Yes, I love you for wanting to help. Most would just jump right at the chance for a guy to pay her way in this place. But I really want to pay. You can pay next time we go out.” I smile at him and grab his hand.

             
“Thank you.”

             
We walk through the entrance and Carter gets a map of the park. I forgot how big this place is. Oh boy, lots of walking. I can do this “Okay, where to first?”

Chapter 35

On the drive home, Tyler and Carter go on and on about the rides they rode. I was exhausted and my feet ached.

             
“You were a trooper today.” Carter remarks and takes my hand in his. I smile at him and then glance at Tyler who is passed out in the back seat. It was worth it.

             
“My body will pay for it later. But I had fun. Thanks for taking him. I think this will be a memory he will never forget.” He looks up at Tyler through his mirror and smiles. I mostly stayed put and played games or read my pregnancy book and listened to my music. I did get up and walk around every once in a while. I think I even fell asleep on the bench. I was woken up by a stranger sitting next to me. It was creepy…they started talking to me thinking I was listening. I didn’t stay seated for long after that. My legs hurt and my back was sore but I managed to suck it up and take small breaks when needed. I didn’t want to ruin this day for my brother. The pain was worth his happiness.

             
I rest my head on the back of the chair and glance out the window. It was fun to see the park lit up with lights. Tyler’s eyes also lit up with excitement. “We need to put lights on my house.” I state, stretching my legs out.

             
“I’ll get Mason to help me. You and Meg can just do the bushes.” I nod, closing my eyes exhausted.

             
True to his word, later that week Mason and Carter got our lights up on the roof while Meg and I wrapped multicolored lights around the bushes in the front. We also got a reindeer and Santa’s sleigh as well as a snowman in our yard. “Wow that looks awesome!” Tyler exclaims with fascination. He hugs each of us, thanking us for an awesome job.

             
“It’s no problem. It’s not like your sister can do it right now.” Mason teases. I glare at him knowing it’s true and the fact that I always loved doing the lights. “I’m just kidding.” He nudges my shoulder.

             
“Oh, this looks fabulous. You all did a superb job. My God.” My mother squees. “Would you all like some cookies and milk?”

             
“We’d love to but Mason needs to help me put up my tree and lights now. I’m totally jealous.” I laugh at Meg.

             
“You can always borrow Carter. I’m sure he’d help, right baby?” I ask, putting him on the spot.

             
“Oh, yeah I can help if you want.” He agrees.

             
“Oh sweet. That would be fantastic. Thanks Carter.” Meg claps her hands excitedly.

             
“Sure, I’ll meet you guys in a bit.”

             
“Okay, thanks for your help Meg.” I hug her and Mason as they leave. My mother and Tyler go back in the house, leaving me and Carter outside. I stare in awe at our house with the lovely lights. It makes me feel giddy. I love this time of year.

             
“I wish you could see this baby. It’s beautiful. By the time you come out, they will have been taken down.” I tell my belly.

             
“Take a picture of it and show it off then” Carter comes from behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. I lean back into his chest, gripping his hands in mine. “It’s nice, isn’t it?”

             
“It’s beautiful. And hey, thanks for agreeing to help with Meg’s lights. That’s sweet of you.” He kisses my head.

             
“No problem at all. You wanna come with me?”

             
“No, I think I’m going to stay here and crash. I’m tired.”

             
“Are you ready to see the baby?”

             
“Yes, I’m ready to know which name to use.”

             
“You have a name picked out?” I nod, refusing to tell him. “What are they?”

             
“I’ll let you know when I find out.” We stand there a little longer in silence until I practically fall asleep in his arms, standing up. He takes me to bed, kisses me and leaves me to my slumber.

             
The day has finally arrived. I’m nervous and excited all at once about going to my appointment. Excited about knowing the sex of the baby, and nervous about Nick coming along, because let’s face it; it’s an awkward situation. But I won’t let him ruin this day for me. I finish getting dressed in my warm clothes before going downstairs.

             
“So, I’m betting it’s a boy.” Meg says, while we’re sitting at the kitchen table waiting on my mom. My leg is shaking and I can’t stop it. It repeatedly moves up and down. “Dude, quit it. You’re making me nervous.”

             
“Sorry, just a little antsy.”

             
“A little? What’s got you so nervous anyway?”

             
“Seeing Nick. The last time didn’t end well.” Just then the doorbell rings. We both look at each other.

             
“Maybe if we sit here in silence long enough, he’ll take the hint and leave.” Meg remarks as I make my way out of the seat.

             
“I can’t. I told him he could come.” She makes a face, provoking a laugh from me as I enter the hall. I open the door and see Nick standing on the other side of the door in jeans and a polo shirt. I move away from the door, nod and let him in.

             
“Hi Gracie. You look nice.” I smile, can’t help but notice his scruffy face. He always hated facial hair.

             
“Gracie, ready to go?” My mother calls from the stairs.  She sees me and then sees Nick standing beside me. “Oh, hi Nick.” She says politely.

             
“Hi, Mrs. Jordan.” My father comes down the stairs to join us. He takes notice of Nick in the room and makes an unpleasant sound. This cannot be good.

             
“Hey daddy we’re about to leave for my appointment.” I give him a hug.

             
“Yeah, I know. Good luck baby. I hope the baby is healthy and a boy.” He teases, still looking at Nick. He squirms under his scrutiny. “A healthy baby, we’ll leave it at that.”

             
“Hi Mr. Jordan.”

             
“Nick.” The tension in the air is palpable and I break the silence, announcing my impatience. I tell my dad goodbye as I’m already walking out the door. In the car, it’s worse. We ride in my mom’s car in silence. Even though Nick has his own car, he chose to ride with us. I was rather annoyed, but again, he’s not ruining this day.

             
“So, how’s everyone been?” He dares to actually ask us – as if he never left us alone in a field at night. Hell, for good. We each glare at him.

             
“I don’t know, have you taken your mouth off your mom’s teat yet?” I ask, sarcastically.

             
“That’s enough Gracie. We are going to have a pleasant day. No fighting.” My mom chides. I stare out the window, refusing to acknowledge him the rest of the ride there.

             
The office is semi busy. It takes me about 30 minutes to be seen. When the nurse calls me back I quickly rush inside, leaving the rest behind.

             
“Okay, step on the scale.” I glance at Nick, silently asking him not to look at my weight. When he doesn’t take the hint, or maybe doesn’t even notice me glaring at him I can’t help but have to get snotty.

             
“Do you mind?” He turns away. I step up and look down at the scale, revealing eight pounds more than the last time. So far I’ve gained about 15 pounds. I think that’s good, considering I didn’t gain much in the beginning. I hope to gain no more than 25-30 pounds the whole pregnancy.

             
“Okay, looks good. I think you’re on the right track. Let’s get you to the room.” We follow her to the room to wait for the doctor.

             
“Gracie. Are you ready to see your baby boy or girl?”

             
“Boy please.” I hear Nick say under his breath. I glare at him. How dare he wish for either one? He has no right.

             
“Yes, I’m ready.”  We follow her to the sonogram room. I get up in the bed as my doctor is setting the equipment up. My mother and Meg both look excited, smiling at me and then at the screen. I hold my belly, waiting for this moment. A feeling of anticipation has me impatient but also a feeling of disappointment settles on me, wishing Carter were here.

             
“Hey, can I have my phone from my purse?” I ask Meg. She hands it to me and I grab my phone from the front pocket. I send a quick text.

             
Me: Hey, I miss you. I’m in the room, about to see the sex. Wish you were here.

             
Carter: Hey beautiful, I wish I were there too. Is he behaving himself? I’ll kick his ass if he’s being a dick.
I smile at that comment and contemplate telling him he’s indeed been an ass. But I decide to play nice. I could just be having a bad, hormonally charged day.

             
Me: No, it’s okay. He’s been fine. I just want to tell you I love you. I’ll show you the pic soon. Call me later?

             
Carter: Of course babe. Good luck. I hope the baby is what you hoped for. I love you.
The doctor places the cold liquid stuff on my belly and picks up the dopple thing. I should learn these terms, and she places it over the stuff. “Okay, let’s see if we can tell the sex now.”  She moves the equipment around my belly and I watch the screen, waiting for a sign of a boy and girl. I then notice that Nick is right beside me, too close for comfort. I move over subtly.

             
“Oh look at that. Those lines are so cute.” Meg remarks, while pointing to the screen in fascination.

             
“Yeah, aren’t they adorable?” I laugh. My doctor explains the baby parts on the screen to her. We finally see it. We see the baby. We see her. It’s a girl.

             
“Yes, it’s a girl. Here’s how you tell.” She points to the sex area. We hear her heartbeat as well. I cry. My emotions get the best of me. I wanted a girl, secretly. I wanted her. Tears fall down my face and Meg notices reaching my side, she grabs my hand and squeezes.

             
“You’re having a girl Gracie. That’s amazing. I can bet you have a name picked out already.” I nod, mutely.

“Yes, Kylie.” I named her Kylie Renee. That was my girl name I picked out and Hunter if it was a boy. But I’m getting my Kylie. I’m so excited but having trouble expressing it because my emotions would rather me be a fucking sap. It’s really wearing on my nerves these days and I’m only half way through. Damn, this is annoying. I leave the room and wash my face in the bathroom, trying to get my shit together. Get it together, you pansy.

              On the car ride home, I’m in thinking mode. I can’t wait to show Carter my sonogram pictures and share my excitement of having a baby girl. Now I can refer to her as Kylie and not “the baby” or “it”. I glance in the back seat at Nick. He’s staring out the window. “Thanks for coming Nick.” I say to be nice but I do actually mean it. I decided when I was in the bathroom I was going to quit being a bitch to him. It’s obviously not easy for him either, especially knowing I’m dating his cousin. And this is Christmas, a time to be thankful and be nice to people.

             
“Sure.” He says, forcing a smile. I’m going back to school in a week and I have to get used to seeing him in the halls. I have a few months left, give or take until he leaves for college. I can be nice. “Thanks for the ride Mrs. Jordan.”

             
“Nick you’ve known me long enough to call me Mary.” He nods in acknowledgement as we pull up in front of the house and get out. Nick is strolling to his car without saying a word to me.

             
“Hey, wait up.” I call, following him. “What’s wrong?” He opens the door, turning around to face me.

             
“What’s wrong? You’ve been a complete bitch. Not to mention this whole situation is so weird and uncomfortable. I’d like to get home where I’m wanted. That’s all.” I glare at him, pissed off.

             
“Wanted? You mean treated like a damn trophy? What the fuck Nick? You need to get over yourself. You’re not the only one this is hard for. I would rather Carter have come with me, but I thought it would be okay with you there. You don’t have to be a dick.” I start to walk off and then turn around – not quite finished. “I’m sorry things have been so complicated. But in just a few short months, you’ll get to go away to college and forget all about this shit back home and live the dream you’ve always wanted. And I hope it’s everything you’ve ever dreamed of.” I say calmly, surprising myself by actually meaning it. I leave him outside, staring after me. I’m exhausted and go to bed, but not without texting Carter first.

             
Me: It’s a girl! I’m having a girl.

             
Carter: Congrats babe! So happy for you. What’s her name?