Color Blind (11 page)

Chapter
11

Official

Coasting down Ocean Avenue on the back of
Cooper’s bike is like an out-of-body experience. I am free, freer than I’ve ever
been. The wind in our ears makes it impossible to talk, but with my arms
wrapped tightly around him, I am closer to Cooper Goode than I have ever been
to anyone.

We ride down the busiest portion of the
Strip, passing jewelry stores, tattoo parlors, and beachwear shops. Then we
cruised past hotels and restaurants with eclectic facades and glossy walls of
windows. The amount of businesses on either side of us shrinks until I am
staring out at ocean on my right and bay and marshland on my left. Cooper
signals that he is going to pull over, and we come to a stop at the foot of a
bridge that overlooks the wide Atlantic Ocean. I look out over the churning water.

I’m experiencing a picture of what my heaven
will be like. The ocean will be present, and the sun and sand, and so will
Cooper.

Cooper takes off his helmet and walks
around the bike until he’s standing behind me. He wraps his arms around my
waist. I lean back into his strong chest, and I truly am in heaven.

No. I am home.

“I’m sorry I kissed you like that
earlier. I couldn’t help myself. I know you’re sort of taken.”

“Actually, I’m not. Sort of taken, I
mean. I’m not taken at all. I told you that at the bonfire, remember?”

“Oh yeah?” His expression is dubious.
 
“I’ve seen you with Luka. You two
look…together.” Cooper turns me around in his arms and focuses intently on my
face. His eyes drift down to my lips, and then shift back to my eyes.

“That’s why I wanted to see you. I told
Luka it was over between us. Today.”

He sucks in a sharp breath. “Are you for
real?”

I smile up at him nervously. “I’m for
real. I like Luka. But he’s not the guy for me. He knows that now.”

He grabs me in a bear hug, so quickly I don’t
have time to get my arms around him. I laugh into his shoulder.

“Who is the guy for you?” he asks. His
voice is muffled as he speaks into my neck.

“I don’t think I need to answer that
question.”

He pulls his head out of my neck, gazing
down at me. “I do need you to answer that question. I want to be perfectly
clear.”

“You are. If you’ll have me. You’ve
always been the guy for me, somehow.”

He scoops me off my feet and squeezes me
tightly against him, spinning me around in a jubilant circle.

“I take it this is happy news for you?” I
ask, giggling.

He whispers in my ear. “It’s the best
news. I can’t believe you’re real, and I found you.”

I sigh, feeling like I’ve won some kind
of guy lottery. Where did this boy come from? He seemingly walked into my life
out of nowhere, and now I can’t picture it without him.

“I know the feeling,” I whisper back.

He looks down into my eyes with total
seriousness.

“There is shit in my past that I don’t
want to involve you in, Cam. Part of the reason my mom and I decided to move
here was to get away from some things. It’s nothing for you to worry about, but
I need you to know that I would never put you in danger, and I want a clean
slate here. With you.”

My brow furrows. “What kinds of things?
Are you in trouble? I want to help.”

He shakes his head emphatically. “It’s
nothing we need to discuss. It’s all over now. I’m here, and the past is the
past. I’m fine, and I’m with you.”

“Okay,” I reply. “I trust you, Cooper.”
And I truly do. I know that if there is something I need to know about, he’ll
tell me. I just want to start this exciting ride with him. I want to be his.

I look out at the ocean again. It’s so hauntingly
beautiful, and peaceful in color and sound. I can’t imagine anything disrupting
this for us.

Cooper’s lips lower to meet mine, and the
problems from his past, the ocean, the highway…it all fades away.

***

Dara calls on my way home, and I tell her
she could meet me at my house.

When I pull into the parking lot, she’s waiting
by her car.

“Girl! I can’t wait to hear this.
Cooper’s homework? Really? I knew you were having second thoughts about
starting a relationship with Luka. But I didn’t know that meant you would go
running straight for Cooper…literally!” She shakes her head, and her long hair
flies wildly around her face.

“Come on,” I reply, pulling her into the
apartment.

We run to my room, and I fling my door
shut behind us. I fall dramatically on the bed, sighing.

“Oh Lord,” Dara says. “If that crazy grin
is any indication, I’m guessing that you’re madly in love with Cooper Goode.
Already.”

“Madly in love might be an exaggeration,”
I admit. “But Dara, holy hell. The boy has me shook. I don’t even know where
these feelings came from. I don’t do this, go gaga over a guy. You know I
don’t!”

“No, you don’t,” she sighs. She lays next
to me on the bed and slings an arm across my stomach. “That can only mean one
thing, my friend. L-O-V-E. Trust me, I know.”

There is a light knock on my door, and my
mom walks in.

“Did someone just spell the word love?”
she asks, eyeing me suspiciously. “Cam, Luka is really nice, but—“

Dara gives me a long, pointed look.

“Mom, um, hey,” I say. “You don’t under--“

“When I met Luka, I asked you how he was
going to fit into the life you have planned out for yourself. He’s a nice
change from the rigid way you usually keep yourself holed up in your room
working on a dance routine or dancing at the studio 24/7, but love? I don’t
know, it might be too fast. I know he’s a nice boy, from a nice family—“

“Mom!” I interrupt. “I told Luka that I
wasn’t ready for a relationship with him.”

“You did? Oh, I didn’t mean--did he do
something?” She shakes her head, confused.

“Not at all,” I assure her. “He just
wasn’t right for me.”

“Well only you would know that. If you
aren’t dating Luka, then why are you and Dara sitting in here talking about
love?

I cross my arms, waiting. It might take
her a few minutes, but I know she’ll figure out that I’m not talking.

Mom looks at Dara, and then swings her
head back toward me. “Dara said the word ‘love.’ If she wasn’t talking about
Luka, then who…?” she trails off, looking from one of us to the other.

I sigh. Am I ready for my mom to know
about Cooper? Probably not. My mom isn’t the
judgy
type, and she rarely noses into my business. But Cooper is a different story.
He’s rougher around the edges than Luka is, and my mom knows rough around the
edges from personal experience. I didn’t want her to make an impression about
Cooper based on a comparison to Luka. I needed to give her some time to forget
about Luka first. I also hoped she didn’t compare Cooper to my father.

I don’t think she’s ready for Cooper yet.

“Mom, that conversation was
P-R-I-V-A-T-E. Dara and I have some things to talk about. And then I have some
choreography to work on. So…” I look pointedly at my door.

Her eyes narrow. “Fine. I can take a
hint. And I will give you your P-R-I-V-A-C-Y. But I hope you don’t shut me out
for long, Camryn.” She leaves, closing the door behind her.

Dara shakes her head. “You’re not going
to be able to hold out on her for long. You’re not the secret-keeping kind.”

“Oh, hush,” I say, sinking back onto my
bed. “Let me enjoy one night of parent-free revelry about my new boyfriend.”

Cooper

I wanted to stay there and kiss my new
girlfriend all night long. I would have, too, if she hadn’t told me she needed
to get home. I didn’t want to let her go, but I made plans to pick her up for
school the next day.

I walk back into Aunt Stacey’s house, quietly
closing the door behind me.

“Where have you been?” a voice barks out.

I jump, and turn around slowly. “Why? I’m
pretty much an adult. Does it matter?”

My mother strides toward me. “Of course
it matters. I have things to discuss with you, and I don’t have time to wait
around while you scoot around town on that bike.”

I somehow restrain an eye roll. My mother
is prone to dramatics, and I’m not in the mood to let her kill my buzz.
 
I’m on a high after spending the evening
with Cam.

“What is it, Mom?”

“I want you to come back to Maryland with
me.”

“What? Are you crazy? You’re kidding,
right?”

“No, Cooper, and don’t talk to your
mother like that. I don’t like your tone. I don’t want to move down here
anymore. We have important business to attend to back in Maryland.” She crosses
her arms, staring daggers at me.

“We have important…what the
hell
are you talking about?” I roar.
“I’m not going back to Maryland! I just barely got away from that hellhole! Why
would I go back?”

“That’s not for me to tell you, Cooper.
Now you listen to me—“

“Jen? What are you talking about? Why is Cooper
so upset?” My aunt walks toward us tentatively, looking like she’s walking into
a lion’s den.

Which she might as well be.

“She wants me to move back to Maryland!”
I yell.

“And you’re my child, so that’s exactly
what you’re going to do,” my mother snaps.

“Actually, Jen, he’s not a child,” Aunt
Stacey says. “He’s eighteen. And if you plan on staying in Maryland, then
that’s another bad decision that you have every right to make. But Cooper is
staying here with me until he finishes school.”

My mother’s mouth drops open. “You little
bitch. If you think you can keep my son from me—“

“Shut up, Mom. Just shut up. I’m not
leaving. Period.”

I turn and walk away from her.

“What’s keeping you here, Cooper?” My
mom’s voice stops me and I turn.

“You’ve never told me no before,” she
says. Her voice wavers slightly. It’s the only indication I have of how upset
she is.

“There’s a lot keeping me here, Mom,” I
sigh. “I’m not going back to Maryland. I want you here with me. But if you
don’t want to be, it won’t be the first time you chose something over me. I’m
sure it won’t be the last.”

I turn, climbing the stairs two at a time
until I burst into my room.

I slam my door so hard the walls shake,
and lean against it.

My breathing is heavy and ragged as I
replay the conflict with my mother in my head.

Maryland? There is no way she’s getting
me back there. Whatever she gotten into, I’m not helping her.

Not this time.

Chapter
12

Seashell

Camryn

The morning after Cooper and I make it
official I am taking a little extra care to get ready for school. My phone
buzzes on the dresser in front of me, and I smile when I read the sender’s name.

Cooper:
 
you still want a ride to school this
morning, beautiful?

I almost choke. I can imagine the look on
my mom’s face when she sees me don a leather jacket and hop onto the back of
Cooper’s motorcycle.

Camryn:
 
No thanks. My mother’s heart can’t take
it. But meet me there in 20?

I wait, hoping he’s not mad at me for
going back on our plans.

Cooper:
 
Can’t wait to spend the day with my
girl. See you in 20 or less.

That puts a little pep in my step, and I
arrive outside at Dara’s car at least two whole minutes earlier than usual.

When we pull into our usual spot at
Oceanview next to Brandon’s Jeep, he is standing next to it as usual, waiting
for Dara. As we get out, we see his gaze drift over to the space on the other
side of his, where Cooper’s motorcycle leans against its kickstand.

And my tall, leather clad destiny is standing
next to it.

Cooper takes off his helmet, shaking out
his hair, and it’s all I can do to look casual as I walk over to meet him. He
holds out his hand, and I see a small pink seashell resting against his palm.

I look up at him, raising my eyebrows but
leaving my question unspoken.

“I was taking a walk last night, and when
I picked this up it reminded me of you. Smooth, untouched, and beautiful.
You’re my seashell, and now this is yours.”

I can’t hide my smile as I take his gift
from him and close my fingers around it. He’s right; the seashell is smooth,
and cool to the touch.

I lean into him and wrap my arms around
his waist. He returns the gesture and I smile up at him.

“Thank you,” I say. “This might be the
best gift I’ve ever gotten.”

“Ever?” he says with mock surprise. “Man,
Cam. Your Christmases must really suck. I’m going to have to fix that this
year.”

I sock him in the arm and he laughs.

We walk over to Brandon and Dara, and
Brandon sends Cooper a reluctant high-five. He slings his arm around Dara, and
mumbles, “What’s up man?”

Cooper’s easy smile makes my stomach turn
a somersault. He hoists his messenger bag over his shoulders and takes my hand.
“How’s it going, Brandon? Good morning, Dara.”

Dara offers him a sweet smile. I know my
girl, though. That smile is as sweet as snake venom.

“It is a good morning, isn’t it?
Especially when that smile lights up my best friend’s face. As long as you’re
the cause of that smile, Cooper, we’ll keep having good mornings.”

“Message received,” Cooper answers. I
squeeze his hand, and he glances down at me. When he leans down to meet my lips,
I know he’s not offended by Dara’s warning.
Good
.
I won’t have to kill her later.

I stop him, and let Dara and Brandon walk
on ahead of us. “Cooper…” I look down at my shoes, wondering how to ask him the
question that’s been rolling through my mind all night. I decide to just spit
it out, and see how he responds. “Are we…official?”

Asking is awkward and miserable. I feel
my face heating up. But I have to hear the words.

He lifts my chin. “Camryn Grimes, we’ve
been official since I met you. You only just admitted it.”

I can’t hide the brightness in my smile,
and I don’t want to.

“And now I have my seashell to prove it.”

We walk into the school building, and the
seas of Oceanview students seem to part for us. Eyes settle on me on every
side, and not all of them are friendly. Especially the female eyes. Definitely
nothing friendly about those.

After the bonfire, Cooper has become sort
of a celebrity at school. His voice caused a bit of a sensation, and all the
single girls (and some not-so-single ones) want him.

Badly.

As we walk through the commons, Cooper
leans down to whisper in my ear. “Relax. Eyes can’t hurt you, Cam. Just don’t
feed them.”

I giggle and hold my head up higher after
that, right up until we see the P.B.G.C.’s.

Courtney’s eyes narrow as we walk by, and
Alicia all but spits at our feet. They don’t say anything, but I know that it’s
because Cooper was is my side. They’ll catch me alone, and they won’t bother to
restrain themselves.

I’m
 
glad Cooper and I have first period
together. He makes me stronger, and I need it this morning.

***

The lunch table. The only place in a high
school where social status trumps anything academic. And now Cooper and I get
to navigate the shark-infested ocean that was the Oceanview cafeteria as a new
couple.

As we head for our normal table, I stop
short. Brandon, Dara, Sarah, another basketball player named Toby…and Luka. The
ultimate awkward situation has come to life.

Lord,
help me.

“Um…let’s sit somewhere else,” I suggest,
tugging Cooper’s hand.

“I’m game to sit anywhere you want, Cam,”
he answers. He stop and placed his hands on my waist, turning me to face him.
He spreads his stance wide so he’s lower and able to look me in the eye. “But
we have to face him sometime. Do you really want to put it off?”

I sigh. He’s right. I nod, and we veer in
the direction of my usual lunch table.

“Hey guys,” I say, as Cooper pulls out my
chair.

“Hey,” Dara answers brightly, trying to
compensate for the awkwardness. “How’s your day going?”

“Good day,” I answer. I can feel Luka’s
eyes on me as Dara and I chat, and it makes me blush.

“So Coop,” Brandon says. “When’s your
band’s next gig?”

“We’re playing The Spot, on the Strip, in
two weekends.”

While Cooper and Brandon discuss the ins
and outs of the band’s musical adventures, I realize I have forgotten my drink
at home. I head for the lunch line to grab some milk.

As I’m standing in line, I sense motion
behind me. When I turn, Luka is standing there, closer than I expect, and I
back up a few steps.

“Luka—“ I begin.

“Don’t say it, Cam,” he interrupts me.
“Just tell me if you’re happy.”

“I’m happy,” I answer, my eyes searching
the cracks in the beige tiled floor.

“Cam,” he growls in frustration. “You
didn’t give me a chance! I could have made you happy, too.”

I glance back toward the lunch table.
Cooper’s eyes burn into mine, and his chair scrapes against the floor as he
pushes it back and stand up. I shake my head slightly, and he crosses his arms.
He stays where he is, but he doesn’t sit back down.

“Luka, none of this was about you. I had
to follow my heart. It led me to Cooper. You did absolutely nothing wrong.”

“Cam, I don’t trust him. I think you’re
choosing the wrong guy. I’m not going to give up on you yet, Cam. I can’t.”

“I appreciate you looking out for me,
Luka. You don’t have to worry. Cooper will take good care of me.”

I purchase my milk and return to our
table with, Luka trailing grumpily behind me.

When I sit down, Cooper leans over and
whispers in my ear, eyes trained on Luka. “Everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” I whisper. I let my
cheek linger against his for the shortest of seconds, and then proceed to eat
my lunch while I join in the conversation at the table.

Chapter
13

The
Spot

Sarah’s earsplitting shriek startles me
so badly I nearly fall over.

“What? You don’t like it?” I twirl
slowly, checking out the back of my outfit in the mirror. The short dress is
all silver sparkles and my heels are higher than they’ve ever been. But it’s my
first time going to a club. I want to look the part. Looking the part is what I
do.

“I freaking love it!” Sarah is so loud I’m
scared she’s going to alert my mom, who is getting ready to go to work in her
room. I quickly put on a long black trench coat and slip off my heels.

I turn to Sarah, exasperated. I’m stuck
with Sarah as my partner in crime tonight, because Brandon is picking Dara up.
We’re all sneaking out to hear Cooper’s band play at The Spot, a nightclub at
the oceanfront. As far as my mom is concerned, I’m just spending the night at
Sarah’s house.

As I pull on some boots, I shush Sarah.
“Not so loud! My mom is right down the hall.”

“Sorry. But you look hot! I’m wearing my
tightest skinny jeans. I’m going to have to change in the car while you drive.”

I imagine her little body flailing about
in the backseat while she tries to pull on a pair of skinny jeans in the car.
Then I quickly stop imagining it, so I don’t collapse from laughter.

We escape the house without suspicion,
and then we’re on our way toward the oceanfront. I’m beyond nervous. Cooper and
I have been together as a couple for a few weeks at school, but now we are
going to be surrounded by our classmates and strangers, in an environment that’s
brand new to me. How will he want me to act? Like a groupie? I frown, thinking
about it. I’m not a groupie, and I sure as hell don’t plan to act like one with
my own damn boyfriend.

We park in the lot belonging to the club
and walk up to the door. We have both opted to leave our coats in the car, and
we’re shivering in the frigid ocean air by the time we reach the club doors.

A tall, bald bouncer stands with his
hands clasped in front of him, blocking the door. His black t-shirt stretches
across his broad chest, and tattoos peek out from beneath both sleeves and the
crew neck. We stand on tiptoes to see the front while we wait in line. My eyes
keep flickering back to Scary Bouncer Guy, though. I don’t like his look.

I spot the P.B.G.C.’s standing near the
front of the line.
Great
. I hope the
club was big enough to keep them on the opposite side from me all night.

When we finally reach the front, the bald
bouncer holds out his hand.

 
“I.D.’s,” he says.

“Um, we’re with the band?” I say, my
voice rising in a question at the end. I definitely feel like a groupie.

“Yeah,” Sarah snaps. “Check the list.”

I think Sarah’s been waiting a long time
to say that.

We tell him our names and he does,
consulting a clipboard on the podium beside him. Silently, he stamps both of
our hands and gestures inside.

“Don’t even think about ordering from the
bar,” he grumbles. “Water, soda. Those are your options.”

We scurry past him and enter the club,
staring around us at the hot, smoky room.
           
“Good
lord, it’s loud in here,” I shout as we began squeezing between the hordes of
people standing in the large room.

“What?” Sarah screams.

I shake my head, refusing to yell over
the booming bass.

I take in a long stainless steel bar located
off to my left with two bartenders wearing black t-shirts that read “the spot” in
electric blue letters. To my right stands an area of low, circular leather
lounge chairs and loveseats. Nearby, a VIP area is roped off with tables and
chairs.
 
And straight ahead, a low
stage is centered against the wall, and my boyfriend sits on a stool, tuning
his guitar.

“There’s Cooper!” I squeal, grabbing
Sarah. The groupie is just rolling off of me at this point.

“Oh, girl, don’t go over there yet. Let
him sweat you a little bit while you work the crowd!”

I don’t know why I’m taking relationship
advice from a very single Sarah, but it seems like a good idea to me.

So instead of running over to the stage,
I sweep my gaze around the room again. Back at the door, Brandon and Dara are
entering the club together.
Thank God.

She spots me, and they walk over. Dara is
smoking tonight, in a leather mini with spiky gold heels.

“Whew!” she says. “Looks like the whole
senior class has turned out to see your man tonight, and then some.”

“And then some” is right. Plenty of
college kids appear in the crowd as well. Girls who look older and more sophisticated
than we do with their flirty expressions and uppity demeanors. I survey our
group, and decide we’re holding our own pretty well.

“Let’s dance!” I shout, leading Dara,
Brandon, and Sarah out onto the dance floor. Once we’re out there, I spot some
of the dance team members and basketball players in the middle of the floor,
moving to the beat of an club-banging dance track. Obviously, the DJ is burning
up the time until Cooper’s band is scheduled to start their performance.

I shimmy and shake to the music, enjoying
myself. As a dancer, this is where I belong. In the middle of the dance floor
with my girlfriends, living it up to hot music.