Craving Talon (38 page)

“Fuck!” he growls and puts his head in his hands.
 

After a few minutes of him beating himself up internally he pushes away from the door jamb and goes into the bathroom. A few minutes after that I hear the shower start.
 

I pick up my phone, hoping for a text or anything from her and there is nothing, at least not from her. I have a bunch of emails from the label, discussing changes to the New York schedule, the schedule for tomorrow’s signing at the mall, the radio station spot in Chicago Wednesday morning, etcetera.
 

I pull up my texts.
 

Me to Addison: Not violating safeword. U R not in vicinity, just need 2 knw u r okay?

Addison: I’m fine, shopping, be back between five and six. He awake yet?

Me: Yes, and he’s pissed, desperate to talk to you. I’ll keep him at bay.

Addison: Thnx cowboy. :-*

I take a lot of comfort in the fact that she’s not mad at me, but I’m pissed off because I have to suffer at the hands of Talon’s mouth, jealousy and temper. I wish there was some way to actually talk to him. I knock on the door, open it. “You hungry?”
 

“No,” he snaps back.
 

I step into the bathroom and pull open the glass door of the shower and he’s facing away from me. “Listen to me. I am not the one for you to be pissed off with right now. You’re the one you should be pissed at. Do not take this out on me. I am suffering just as much, if not more than you are because she safeworded because of you. Remember? I’d already discussed what happened with her, and rather than fucking talk to her, you let jealousy win out. She can barely handle the two of us, what on god’s green earth made you think that she’d ever consider cheating on us?”
 

He doesn’t answer. He just hangs his head. I strip out of my clothes and climb into the shower with him. He jumps slightly when I touch his shoulders. I begin to massage his shoulders, down his arms. He turns around, putting his head on my shoulder and I can feel the silent sobs wracking his body. I rub his back. “I don’t want to fuck this up, I can’t fuck this up. She means everything to me.”
 

“You know, she’s not the only one in this relationship.”
 

His head comes up and I can see his eyes are red from crying, which is likely why he snapped at me in the first place. “I know,” he says as he brings a hand up to cup my cheek. A thrill runs through me and he places his lips on mine. Kissing me with gusto and I melt. Fuck, this shit is heady, and too much with him sometimes, but I don’t stop kissing him back.
 

When he pulls back I breathe, “I love you.” He stiffens, his body trembling slightly. “I know, it’s alright.” I reach up to cup his cheek in my palm. He relaxes. “I know what it means to you for me to say that, I know that you probably don’t feel the same way. But I needed to say it. I need….” I am cut off by a finger at my lips.
 

“Shut up, Kyle.” My heart sinks. “I…I don’t know if I can, or am ready to admit it to myself yet.”
 

I kiss his finger. “It’s okay,” I breathe and he moves his finger. This time, I take his head in my hands, bringing my lips to his and push him against the shower wall. He’s already hard, and was hard when he turned around. I press into him, our cocks trapped between our bodies and I explode with desperate need. I feel his cock twitch under me and I know he needs this too.
 

“Let’s go to bed,” I breathe and he nods.
 

I pull him from the shower and wrap a towel around myself and dry him off. When I stand up, he reaches between the gap in the towel, taking hold and stroking my cock upward. My legs shake and my balls draw up in pleasure. “I need this,” he breathes against my lips and a new wave of pleasure rocks through me.

Talon and I make our way, clumsily, to the bed where I fall down on top of him. Our mouths haven’t stopped moving and I can feel emotions pouring into me. I know, in some strange way, that this is his way of telling me he loves me. He can’t say the words. Even when he says them to Addison, I can tell that it’s a struggle for him, but he does it because he knows how it makes her feel. I don’t need to hear it from him. His kisses, his touches, his everything tells me what I need to know.
 

I straddle him. The action causes our cocks to rub together and he groans into my mouth. “What do you want, Talon?” I growl.
 

“You.”
 

“You have me,” I counter.
 

“No, I need you, inside me.” He brings his hand down around my cock, stroking it with his need and I close my eyes, my mouth falling slack from the pleasure he’s eliciting in me. My need to be in him grows hotter.
 

I reach between us, taking his cock into my hand and I stroke up and down gently. “Fuck!” he moans and he thrusts his hips up. I sit up to watch our hands dance along each other’s shafts. It’s fucking gorgeous to watch. I try to slide down, to take him into my mouth, but he won’t let go. “Come here,” he breathes. No command, no dominance, just a simple plea for me to do what he wants. I lift my leg over his body and crawl on my knees toward his mouth. His hand never leaves my erection as I do. He turns onto his side, wrapping his mouth around my cock and my balls shrink up tight. I reach for his erection and he stops me with his eyes and a subtle shake of his head.
 

I don’t argue with him. He has some idea in his head and I need to let him roll with it, but it spurs on the idea that he’s doing this to show me what he really feels about me and I shudder with pleasure at the idea. He continues licking and sucking along my shaft. Then his hand moves south, taking my balls and massaging them, letting his finger dip further towards my ass and I’m too close to coming. “Talon?” I grunt. “I don’t want to come in your mouth.”
 

He lets up on my cock, shifting so that he can roll over onto his stomach. “Take it. Take me,” he says with a deep gravel in his voice and my desire to take him overtakes my thoughts.
 

“I’ll be right back,” I tell him with a caress of his back, down along his cheeks and his thigh. I leave in search of the bag, and I find it in Addison’s room. Opening it I see our plethora of toys wrapped in their own little bags for protection and I find a bottle of lube and quickly go back to the other bedroom. Talon hasn’t moved in my absence and he looks at me through heavy eyes as I approach the bed. “You’re sure?”
 

“I’ve never been more sure of anything,” he says as he lifts his hips. With his head and chest still planted on the bed, he reaches back and spreads his cheeks wide, an invitation to take him. Claim him. I saddle up behind him, between his feet and once I’m situated, I can feel his feet touching my calves.
 

I begin working a glob of lube around his hole. Gently rimming him with my finger. He groans and pushes his hips up further, his own invitation for more. I continue gently massaging the tightness, slowly working one, then two, then three fingers inside and he’s thrusting his hips. I reach down and grab hold of his balls and he cries out, “Take me, Kyle. Take me and tell me I’m yours.”
 

I’m shocked by his blatant yet sweet command, and I realize that this isn’t about me. My craving for him to love me has turned into his own desperate craving for me. This is about him. He needs to feel me. He needs to feel my love for him and sex is the only way he knows how. I am past the point of no return. I will give him what he needs because I need it too. I have to know that his ability to do this with me, and just me, is about us, not about our relationship with Addison. This is our moment to be with each other and for me to satisfy my craving for his love. For him.

I begin retracting my fingers, releasing his balls, and begin to work a healthy dose of lube along my cock. He lowers himself onto the bed. Pressing his cock between him and the bed and I press the crown of my own erection gently against his entrance.
 

He doesn’t tense up, he simply relaxes into what I’m doing and I feel a sense of pride in this moment, a sense that he is honestly capable of doing this with me. With little thrusts, I work myself inside of him. Each stroke sending waves of pleasure through my body. Igniting an orgasm. One that’s capable of tearing me apart. But I don’t stop. He needs this, I need this,
we
, need this. Once I am sheathed inside of him, I pause, giving him that moment to adjust. Then I begin sliding in and out of him. My thrusts are slow, but deliberate and he is rocking with me. As his pace against me increases, I increase my own. I grab onto his ass and he arches his back, pushing himself against me and I use my leverage to begin sliding in and out of him harder and faster.
 

He doesn’t tell me to stop, he is moaning with my thrusts and I can see the pure pleasure on his face as I take him, take him for me, for him, and for us. “Fuck me, damn it, Kyle don’t stop,” he groans and I pound into him harder. With each thrust, my orgasm ignites hotter and brighter. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” He grinds against me, taking me, milking me as he shatters, his body convulsing under me and I explode inside of him.
 

Once I can finally move again, I begin extracting myself and he moans. Teasing him, I push back in. “You want me to take you again?”

“Yes,” he groans and thrusts his hips against mine.
 

This time I take him harder and faster. It doesn’t take him long before he’s coming again and I follow shortly after. Soft and sated, my erection no more, I lay down on him. Holding him to me as my dick falls free. “That was intense,” I breathe against his back.
 

“That was amazing,” he says. “I really fucked up with her, didn’t I?” he says with such sadness that I almost want to cry.
 

I sit up and rub his back. “She needed time. I think you hurt her more than anything. You made an assumption that simply isn’t true.”
 

“I realize that now.”
 

“She was so excited to come back here last night. She asked me over and over again if we could leave. She teased the living shit out of me at the club, and then we came back to what happened. I sat by the door for over an hour after I put you to bed. She was crying and it broke my heart.”
 

“I’m sorry I hurt her, and I’m sorry I hurt you.”
 

I lean forward, brushing his hair from his eyes so that I can look at him. The angle is bad so I decide to lie down next to him. “You only hurt me because you hurt her. You said some pretty accusatory things last night and she had it right. Honesty and communication is the foundation of what our relationship is built on. You were being honest about how you felt, but rather than talking about it, you accused her of lying to us.”
 

“Fuck, I don’t remember that.”
 

“Well you weren’t exactly forthcoming with it, but when she brought up honesty and communication, she said that she’s never lied to us and that she isn’t lying to us now, you told her ‘bullshit;’.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. I don’t know how to fix this,” he says.
 

“Well, I think you need to talk to her. Talk it out. You can’t fuck it or buy it away. You’ve got to find it in yourself to talk to her about what happened, how you feel, why you feel the way you do. Believe it or not, Talon, she’s a very brilliant woman who would rather talk it out than piss it all away because you got pissed off. Whether it takes ten minutes or four hours, you’ve got to figure it out.”
 

“I know, shit, I know, I just,” he growls in frustration with himself that he’s in this position, but I can’t imagine him not figuring out a way to do this.
 

My cell phone rings. I get up and pick it up from the nightstand. “It’s her,” I whisper and watch relief wash over Talon’s features. Her calling means she’s ready to talk.

“Hi baby girl.”