Devil's Despair Box Set: Books 1-3 (33 page)

Raegan had explained the threats these men made to her. She didn’t tell me about them in great detail, but she shared with Hem after she woke up, had time to process her surroundings and knew she was safe. This is her revenge, not mine, and I’m taking it for her.

“Hammers to the knees, right? That was what you had in mind for her dad?”

I hear Hem cough softly behind me and when I turn around, he’s signaling I have one more minute. Grabbing the bag I brought with me, I pull out the hammer. Without waiting for one of them to break the rule of speech, I raise it over my head and with all my strength, I slam it into Marcus’s knee then watch as he passes out instantly from the pain. Vinnie cries, weeping openly like the pussy he is.

“Right or left, fucker. I’m going to let you choose.”

He says nothing. The blind bastard can’t decide so I decide for him. “Both.”

In two quick and powerful movements, I shatter both his knees. He’s not as lucky as his uncle; he’s still awake and continues to vomit all over himself.

“That’s it. You’re done.” Shame grabs the hammer and tosses it to the side of Vinnie’s chair. The sound of it hitting the concrete below mimics me, as though it’s telling me the gavel’s been dropped and I’ve lost the chance to execute the guilty.

“I’m not leaving. Fuck that.”

Shame pushes on my chest, his large palm gently sending a deliberate statement. His voice is raspy and certain as he inquires my own same concern that I’ve had all along. “Ace, have you ever killed someone?”

“No.”

“So, you don’t know the damage it can cause to the one doin’ it, do you?”

“I can finish this.”

Shaking his head, he still doesn’t completely agree. “I know you can, but you’re not goin’ to. Cherry needs you to be the same person who left her in the hospital this morning. If you do this, there’ll be no guarantee for that to happen.”

Surrendering slightly, knowing he’s right, I look at Vinnie and Marcus. Both bloodied and beaten, my vengeance only got extended to the edge of death, not the act of death itself.

My whisper breaks with emotion. I don’t chance a look at his face. My eyes stay focused into his broad chest. “They hurt her, Shame.”

“I know they did and we’re gonna handle that for her, but not at the expense of changing you.”

“Ladies?” Hood’s urgency is both mindful and annoying.

Hem walks to Shame and me, and his soft features change. The love he displays for those who are important to him evaporates and in its place comes the fury and ire I’ve only seen a few times since knowing him. “Ace, it’s time to go. You can step outside; we’ll be done quick-like.”

“Thank fuck for that,” Hood says, still impatient but now relieved.

With defeat, I try for the last time. “I’m not gonna win this one, am I?”

Shame laughs while placating me. “Do you ever win with me, little brother? Now, go so I can get back to Mace.”

Before turning around, I look to the evil that sits in the chairs, waiting for their due. I capture it to memory so it can help heal the part of
me
left so broken. Their already-lifeless bodies didn’t suffer enough. I could have kept going, releasing more anger for as long as my body would have let me.

Walking to the door, I pass Hood and before he follows behind me, I say to no one and everyone, “Please, for her, make ‘em bleed for what they’ve done.”

Hood puts his hand on my shoulder, offering relief I can’t possibly feel. “They’ve already bled, brother. Soon they’ll be worm food.”

As I walk, I nod in agreement. “Thanks.”

A few minutes pass as Hood and I stand waiting outside. Hood offers me a cigarette. I quit smoking this year at Bean’s insistence, but accept it anyway. The noises inside are less than what I would’ve expected. Shame yells only once, and Hem’s laugh is displaced and not anything near genuine.

“So, you came here after you left Peril? What’s here?”

Hood spits at his feet, momentarily contemplating my question. “Life, I guess. My parents, old friends, my job.”

“So, this is home.” A statement I’m finding easy to make considering Raegan and California is now what I consider home.

“Home isn’t something I know, Ace. I know people and places, but not a home.”

I take a seat on the pavement slab under us and rest my elbows on my knees, dropping my head between them. It’s been a long fucking week and although I’m thankful for the outcome, I miss my own family, friends, job, but above all, Raegan.

The metal warehouse door opens and stepping outside, Shame turns his head and looks down to find me sitting on the ground and Hood leaning against the warehouse wall. “It’s done.”

His clothes are clean, and his hands hold little blood. Apparently, when Hem said quick-like, he also meant there would be little mess left to clean up. Those animals inside were put down to a quick death; I find this incredibly unfair.

“I’ll have the boys that helped me get them here come help clean them up.” Hood drops his smoke and steps on it while cussing. “Fuckin’ bastards deserved more than what they got.”

Hem doesn’t smoke either, but he asks for one by pointing to Hood’s pack that’s resting on top of his bag. His hands shake the same as mine did. “They deserved a fuck of a lot more and I’m sorry we’re in a rush, but we don’t have the time. Gotta get back, change, pack, and get the girls.”

“You’re leaving already, huh?” This doesn’t surprise me, but I ask for confirmation anyway.

“We are,” Shame says as he brushes the dust off his jean-clad thighs.

“I don’t know how to thank any of you enough for this.”

Hem pats my shoulder with one hand as he helps me up off the ground with the other. “I owed you, Ace. I owed you a fuck of a lot for what you did for me, so don’t give me any more gratitude than that.”

“We talked to Cherry.” I hear the certainty in Shame’s voice and I brace for the backlash of his discussion with her.

“And?”

“And she’s a lot of happy. Either way, you should know we offered to take her home with us.”

At this, I turn my back to them and beside me, I hear Hood exhale heavily while dialing on his phone for the cleaning crew.

Hem starts talking, unafraid of my reaction to his voiced opinion. “She said her home is there in Cali, with you. I want you to know that you’re welcome to come back to Ohio again. I’m not sure if the MC life is for you anymore, though. Decklan is important to her, and you wouldn’t be any good to the kid if you were always gone.”

“My life is with Bean and Sarah.”

Shame concurs, relief traced in his thought. “I was hoping you’d say that. We’ll see you again, I’m sure.”

“You guys coming back next year for Christmas, are you?”

Shame smiles and Hem laughs. Hem’s thoughts on Christmas with the kids is exact. “No fuckin’ way. The kids and their mothers need snow. Christmas in Cali doesn’t offer that. Maybe we’ll come again, though, so take care of Cherry and we’ll call you.”

“Okay, thank you.”

Hem and Shame grab their bags near the door, hike them over their shoulders, bid their goodbyes to Hood and head to their rental van parked a few feet away.

I’m on my way back to Raegan to explain that her nightmare is over. The demons that have haunted her for the past five years are finally slayed, courtesy of the guardsmen that could be considered the Knights of Peril.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

Raegan

THE NEXT FEW days were a blur of activity. Between my meetings with various therapists, saying goodbye to Mace, Sadey, and April, keeping Ace calm, as well as talking with my dad about the move he’ll make to California with Decklan and me, I’m completely overwhelmed and exhausted.

Finally, though, we’re home.

Dad and Decklan will be here in the morning. Dad wanted another night at home so Mom could say her version of goodbye to Decklan. She’s not coming with us. Saddened, I admit I’m almost relieved by this. She doesn’t feel any remorse about our relationship and is hostile toward Dad for leaving her ‘alone.’ My recovery will go on just as my life did, without her in it.

Pulling up to the apartment, I see Sarah first. She’s resting her chin on her hand as her knee holds her elbow, sitting on the bottom step, looking tired and defeated.

As Ace pulls in, she stands. She’s smiling, but still the shadowed sadness in her face is evident. “Wonder what that look’s about?” Ace sits next to me, questioning me as if I would know. He’s making no move to get out.

I reassure him, by replying, “I’m not sure. I’ll go find out.”

Grabbing my arm to get my attention, he demands, “No, you won’t. Fuck that. You have enough to deal with right now. Sarah’s teenage drama can wait, Rae. I mean it.”

Moving my focus from Sarah to Ace, I see the hard lines of his face drawn with concern; he’s starting his dictation already. Appeasing him, for now, I answer his demand with one of my own. “All right, but give her some space. She was here alone with Bean all week, and she’s probably been worried sick about you.”

Opening his door, he repeats my words to himself. “Sarah’s been worried, she says. Like she’s the only one around here with worry. What the fuck ever.”

As Ace rounds, opening my door, he starts to pull me out of the truck. I wince slightly as his hand touches the area where the IV was inserted. The black and blue marks of that and the now-brown and yellow bruising around Ace’s eyes are the only physical marks left as a reminder to what we’ve been through.

Sarah stands behind Ace, patiently holding the door open to capture his attention. Her first words, though, clue me into what’s bothering her. “Hayden Flynn is an asshole.”

Ace lets go of my arm and turns his body to Sarah before knocking her upside the back of her head. “Can you not talk like that? And hello to you, too, squirt.”

A genuine look of surprise crosses her face, but then anger takes its place. “Whatever, Ace. You don’t even know what’s going on up there. He brought
two
girls over. Two! It’s disgusting. Bean thinks this shit is funny, Ace. It’s not. Trav’s mad like me, but he’s drinking and says he’s not leaving Bean alone with Hayden and ‘company’. Like Bean doesn’t already know what’s up?”

Losing his patience at her words, he tosses her my hospital bag and with the force of his throw, it sends her two steps back. “Shut up, squirt. Let’s get Raegan inside.”

Smiling, her words are animated. “Yes, please. I need girl time.”

Ace bends down, insinuating the obvious, but also making Sarah cringe. Pointing to his chest, he torments his little sister with truth. “No, not girl time.
Ace
needs
Raegan
time, and he’s gonna get it without your pouty and trashy mouth interrupting it.”

“Oh, my God! I can’t un-hear that!” she exclaims with a raised voice.

“If you don’t get your fuckin’ ass in the house, you’re gonna hear it in a lot more detail, so beat your feet and get moving.”

Looking around Ace’s body, she finds me and looks up and down my body with care. “Glad you’re home, Raegan. Girl time is tomorrow, then. That’s if Aceface can handle it.” Then she turns around and walks up the stairs to the apartment, leaving Ace and me alone spinning in her wake of teenage terror.

When he turns around and finds me smiling, I can tell he’s holding back what he wants to say. Instead of lashing out further regarding Sarah, he puts his forehead on my shoulder, grabs me around the waist and tells me, “We should take Deck and your dad and move to fuckin’ Alaska. They are all nuts here.”

Rubbing the back of his shoulder with one hand as the other makes its way through his hair, I offer my reply with sincerity. “This is home, Ace. It wouldn’t be home without the nuts.”

“Guess not, but Jesus, I needed a minute. I miss you.” Taking my hand as he shuts the truck door, pulling me with him while he climbs the steps, we enter our house of crazy together.

* * *

Sitting around the small apartment, I watch the decoration of people floating in and out with celebration. I feel guilty accepting their generous homecoming. I left them all without thinking about how my absence would affect them.

I met Maddux, Toby’s son, only briefly. He’s three, so when he’s in a hurry for something, all invested and participating bodies move. He asked Toby to take him outside. Sarah, Toby, and Marlee are out walking him now.

Hayden is standing between the barstools as he leans his back on the counter, holding each new flavor on each arm. They’re quietly contemplating how they’ll spend their evening together. He smiles wide at me when he catches me staring at their scene with distaste. Poor Sarah, this must have hurt to watch, which was what made her abandon the apartment entirely, seeking solace on the stairs outside earlier this afternoon.

Travis sits beside me on the couch, drink in hand. “I’m glad you’re here. I wasn’t sure, even if Ace went to you, that you’d come back.”

“I’m sorry I left without telling you. I was afraid you’d know what I was doing.”

His eyebrows lift with my admission. “Running, you mean?”

“Yeah.”

“I know something about that.”

“I kinda thought you did. I was afraid you’d stop me.”

Picking at the label on the bottle of his beer, he quietly finishes his thought as though offering me a confession. “I would have. Ace was impossible the week you were gone. He loves you, Raegan. He was out of his mind and lashed out at all of us.”

“I’m sorry and I know he loves me.”

“Do you?”

“Yeah, I think I do.”

Looking around the room, he spots Ace walking our way after settling Bean’s attitude from the kitchen. “He’s an idiot for not telling you sooner.”

“Maybe, but… well, you know.”

Not caring who hears the comment, he offers reassurance that I admit I still need. “Sadey pales in comparison to you. I’ve never met the woman, but I don’t have to. She just does.”

“Thank you.”

Giving me a side-arm hug on the couch, he smiles into my ear, watching Ace’s face turn hard with dismay at his action. “Glad you’re home.”

Standing in front of us, hands on his hips, Ace looks down from me to Travis. “Can I get my girl back now, Romeo?”

“Fuck off, asshole. We were just catching up.”