Edward Van Halen: A Definitive Biography (31 page)

CHAPTER 33 

Staying Conscious

In March 1999, the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) created a new record sales award: diamond status. This recognition goes to albums that sell ten million copies or more. Upon creation of the diamond award,
Van
Halen
and
1984
were both honored. It is certainly one of Edward’s biggest achievements—twenty million-plus copies sold of just two albums alone. The only test that matters—the test of time—has proven that those are truly
the
two albums. This made Van Halen one of only six rock bands that have had at least two different album releases sell more than ten million copies domestically. That put Edward and the band in good company with The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Eagles, and Pink Floyd (Def Leppard is somehow also on that list). There is a clear distinction that the two albums on that list are the Dave/Edward albums.

The idea for 1999 was to focus on a follow-up to
Van
Halen
III
. But little actually took place, and there was certainly nothing outside of 5150 to show for it. In July, the band reconvened to begin work on a new record. Renowned producer Danny Kortchmar was officially named producer of the next album in August.

Edward’s continued postponement of his hip surgery finally got to Valerie. “He continued to put it off until he reached the point where he could no longer manage the pain by drinking or doing whatever else he did,” she said. “I offered little help with his discomfort and less sympathy… . My capacity for compassion was degenerative too.”

For reasons known only to Gary Cherone himself, he used his place in Van Halen as a soapbox to counter Pearl Jam’s Eddie Vedder and his pro-choice position on abortion. Gary penned a somewhat infamous poetic rant on his quasi-scientific pro-life/anti-choice stance on the issue. The poem/article was literally titled “An Open Letter to Eddie Vedder” and was published in June of 1999. Obviously an issue that divides people into one of two camps, Gary argued that a human being is a human being at the point of conception. Needless to say, some might argue against that notion, and some might even argue that that’s not even the point. In fact, some might argue whether the third lead singer of Van Halen—who was coming fresh off the entire disaster that was 1998—should be opening his mouth about such a divisive issue in the media. There’s also the angle of him being an unwitting representative of Van Halen—a then 25-year-old band—taking on the last man standing of the grunge movement, Eddie Vedder. Again, only Gary knows why he chose to pick such a fight.

In October 1999, Edward once again opened up to Vic Garbarini of
Guitar
World
in an extensive interview during which Ed was extremely frank on nearly every possible issue. He minimized and deflected any outside diagnoses that he was suffering from depression in any way. “I can be perfectly happy and write and play,” he said. “Put it this way: I don’t like being bummed. I don’t have to be depressed to play the blues. And if anyone begs to differ, well that’s their way.”

He faced the relative failure of
Van
Halen
III
head on. “I’m not hurt or angry that the record didn’t do as well as we thought it would,” he said. “I’m still very proud of it, just like every other record.” He acknowledged that it was indeed different, and theorized that the range of emotions on the album may have simply been too much for some people. “It was over the top,” said Edward. “This might sound arrogant, and I really hope people won’t take it that way, but I had to play what I felt moved by and enjoyed. I can’t contrive that. It’s funny about guitar playing, because that’s the stuff I can’t remember doing at all. That came from my real self, which my ego can’t take credit for.”

Eddie defended Gary against the idea that his vocals on the album sounded stiff. “Yeah, he might have been a bit nervous,” said Edward. He continued:

If you feel there was any stiffness, then you really should blame me. Because he sang just about everything the way I asked him to. The fact that I was writing all the music and it wasn’t his own, and he had to learn it so quickly, probably made a difference, sure. Now we know each other a lot better. Gary’s working with me and writing some of the music himself, rather than just handing in lyrics. We’re all a lot looser, and the new record will reflect that. But I’m very proud of that record. When we moved on with Sammy, I never looked back. And I’m not looking back now, because there ain’t no “back” to go to.

Ed complained that the CD pressing plant that cranked out
Van
Halen
III
was the reason why the CD had poor fidelity. Upon hearing test pressings, Edward apparently leapt into action and went straight to the facility. “They have nothing at these pressing plants that measures sonic quality,” he said. “They have nothing to analyze the full frequency range on the disk; they can only tell if there’s a scratch error or if the disc skips. So when I went down to the pressing plant, I raised a stink. Well, you’re talking about fighting Time-Warner, and I came away feeling like I’d stuck my nose where it doesn’t belong.”

Garbarini pushed Eddie into a corner and asked him which one single song he would put in a time capsule. After initially resisting, Ed finally answered with “Jump.” Noting what a departure it was for Van Halen at the time, he said, “We had the challenge of using the synth and keyboards for the first time and integrating that with the guitar and melody line. It was also our biggest hit. And ‘pop’ comes from the word popular, which means a lot of people liked it. Now, 99 percent of the reason that I make music is to hopefully try and touch people with it. And that one touched the most people. So far.”

At the end of October, Roger Waters of Pink Floyd released a song titled “Lost Boys Calling” for the soundtrack of the film
The
Legend
of
1900
. The song was a collaboration between Waters, legendary film composer Ennio Morricone, and Edward. The tune is a typical Floyd-esque quiet, English piano ballad. Ed’s middle solo so incredibly understated, beautiful, tasteful, and spot on; it’s almost a direct nod to Clapton. Ed also has a brief outro solo in which he beautifully incorporates his own trademark octave feedback notes with tremolo manipulation.

Van Halen Mach III Falls Apart

The band had indeed worked on a few songs over the course of the year, but eventually, the follow-up project was simply abandoned. Without too much surprise, Gary reportedly decided to leave Van Halen of his own accord on November 5, 1999. “Van Halen is one of the greatest rock & roll bands of all time,” said Gary. He went on to lament that it was a simple matter of fact that hardcore Van Halen fans would never accept him or anyone else in the band other than David Lee Roth, or, for a different audience, Sammy Hagar. Alex said, “He was just the wrong choice, it’s that simple… . The chemistry was just wrong.” Pushing the idea that the departure was amicable, Edward referred to Gary as a brother, and proclaimed that they would continue to have a personal and musical relationship. That never did pan out. At the time of Gary’s departure, an official Van Halen press release admitted work on the album they had been recording was only half-finished.

A few years later, Gary opened up a bit more about the split. “I always knew that, every time I stepped on stage, I didn’t have to do anything [wrong] for people to hate me,” he said. “Most of the fans were good, but some of the fans got in my head.” Cherone said flat-out that he was in a no-win situation, period, but that he did not regret taking the job or the experience he took away. “I wouldn’t trade it for the world,” he said. “I wouldn’t trade the experience. I made good friends, and I definitely grew as a singer. Eddie made me a better singer in the studio.” Over a decade removed from the situation, Gary said, “My managers asked me to write my Van Halen story (my three years in the band), but I told them that that stuff is going to be taken to the grave.” Typically, when something really great happens, or you have an awesome experience, you want to talk about it. For the most part, you don’t take great experiences and memories “to the grave.” Ray Danniels simultaneously departed and returned to devoting himself full-time to Rush.

Hip Surgery

It was over. There was only medical work to be done. Edward finally proceeded with his hip replacement surgery just two weeks after Gary’s departure. The procedure took place on November 16, 1999 at Saint John’s Health Center in Santa Monica and was performed by Dr. John R. Moreland, a bit of a hip replacement surgeon to the stars (his other clients included Liza Minnelli and Elizabeth Taylor). Ed desired to stay conscious during the entire procedure. Rather than general anesthetic, Eddie requested an epidural. Edward actually documented the entire ordeal on an audio recorder. Dr. Moreland said, “Maybe he’ll use it on an album.”

Ed came out of the surgery in severe pain. “He complained that the morphine they gave him made him high but didn’t relieve the pain,” said Valerie. However, things settled rather quickly for Ed and he was walking on his own only three days after the operation. When they went home from the hospital, Ed hilariously brought a little souvenir with him—his hip bone wrapped in a plastic bag. “He put it in the freezer,” said Val. “He wrapped the bag with tape, and in large bold letters he wrote: MY HIP BONE—DO NOT COOK!”

With a titanium hip in place, Eddie would eventually recover well. On December 1, Edward told
USA
Today
, “I literally just saw my x-ray. It’s perfect. This is really heaven-sent.” The future would find him doing his trademark bent-leg jumps yet again. If things had only gotten better from there.

For Christmas, Ed gave Valerie a beautiful, understated ruby ring set. Valerie was overjoyed that it matched her taste exactly, but likened it to just another wad of jewelry to throw on the pile. She said it didn’t matter because they weren’t happy. “Part of me wanted to keep kissing Ed,” Val said, “and part of me wanted to wring his neck and scream, ‘Don’t you get it?’”

Just three day before Ed underwent the surgery, my collective VH buddies and I caught David Lee Roth at Stubb’s in Austin. [Note: This show would later become semi-famous in 2011 when a hilarious video called “Find the Mystery Rocker” featured pictures from the show went viral in an attempt to track down the person that lost their disposable camera at the show. The guy that lost his camera was found in relatively short order.] We got there early so we could be as close as possible. We had no idea what we were in for. The man came out swinging and had the capacity crowd at his command like no time had passed. Beautifully, other than “Yankee Rose,” the set was nothing but classic Van Halen songs. From my perspective, Dave had something to prove. He came off the 1996 debacle looking a bit like a played chump. There was talk that he didn’t have the voice anymore to be in the game. I can tell you that from where I stood, Mr. Roth was on fire. He belted out the outro of “Little Dreamer” like a consummate professional. I considered myself a pretty decent singer at the time, but after hearing that break at the end of that song, I remember distinctly thinking, “Damn, now
that
dude can really sing, man. Anyone that says he can’t hasn’t seen this.”

After catching Dave’s show, I called my brother’s widow Susan. She was a bit taken aback by my call because, for one thing, we didn’t talk that often beginning shortly after the plane crash, and also because my voice sounded so much like my brother’s to her, it kind of freaked her out. I went on and on about the show and how Dave did such an excellent job carrying the classic Van Halen torch and that there was absolutely no reason he couldn’t handle the job on a much larger scale. After a bit of awkward silence, I just blurted out, “I don’t know… this would be a phone call I would usually make to Brandon, so I just wasn’t sure what to do, so I just called you.” It was bittersweet, to say the least.

CHAPTER 34 

The Diagnosis

Kicking off the millennium, Ed did an exclusive interview with
Guitar.com
in January 2000. About Dave and Sammy, he said, “I don’t understand either one of these guys. They quit and have nothing good to say about me, yet they want to be in the band. I’m not a psychologist, but I wouldn’t want to work with people I don’t like. They don’t like me, but they want to work with me.” He expressed regret at coining his oft-repeated L.S.D./lead singer’s disease catch-phrase. “I hate that term,” he said. “I regret it. I said it once years ago… . It actually wasn’t even my term; I think it was a friend of mine who pegged it that. It’s just, I guess, the nature of a lot of lead singers to think that they are it and the planet revolves around them.” With reference to
Van
Halen
III
, he said, “It basically stiffed.”

That same month, Eddie went to the dentist for a check-up and a cleaning. According to Valerie, the shape of Ed’s teeth caused him to bite his tongue repeatedly over the years when he ate. She said it was often hard to watch. However, the dentist found the scar tissue on his tongue to be unusual and sent Edward to a specialist.

“We went to the specialist at UCLA Medical Center, who cut out a section of Ed’s tongue and had it biopsied,” Valerie said. “Cancer.” To confirm, a second piece of Ed’s tongue was also taken off and the test results proved the same—squamous-cell carcinoma of the tongue. The doctor called Edward and Valerie into the room to break the news to them at the same time. The doctor insisted that Ed must give up smoking immediately and permanently. From Valerie’s
Losing
It
:

“I don’t want either of you to misunderstand me,” he said. “I want to make this very clear. Ed, you are never to smoke again. Never. I don’t know if I can be any more clear. You are never to smoke again. If you do, this will return.” . . . “Don’t you ever smoke again,” I said, shaking my fist at him. “Because if that doesn’t kill you, like the doctor says it will, I will kill you.”

Within a few months, Eddie resumed smoking. Valerie was completely floored. “I couldn’t believe it when I saw him puffing away,” she said. “Was he insane? He’d heard the doctor’s warning: the cancer would return. Even if he didn’t care about his own life, what about me and Wolfie—most of all Wolfie?” Valerie confessed to crossing the line during an argument when she said, “Why don’t you have another cigarette and get some more of your tongue cut off? Keep it up. Soon you won’t be able to talk.” That was effectively it for Val. Her patience had officially run completely out. She flatly said, “Ed and I were terrible examples of what a husband and wife should be… . Wolfie deserved better.”

To celebrate her 40
^th
birthday on April 23 that year, Valerie insisted on having a girls-only weekend to get a break from Eddie. Before she left, he took her out to their favorite restaurant. Finding fault with everything he did, she was irritated that Ed had set up the dinner so that they could dine in private before the restaurant opened to ensure they would not be interrupted. In Valerie’s mind, she just thought that was rude to the staff to make them all work to suit their schedule. She said that Ed was sweet, pleasant, and calm the entire evening. “Why are you being so nice?” she thought. “I need to figure out how to leave you.”

In May of 2000, Eddie began undergoing weekly “preventative” treatments at M.D. Anderson Hospital in Houston. Although they tried to keep it private, the media began reporting that Eddie had cancer in May. His trips to Houston were too noticeable. Press releases followed to the contrary, but fans were on high alert, for sure.

Alternative Treatments

Like so many other things, cancer was something Edward was determined to take on in his own way. In early summer, Ed and Val flew to New York to meet with a different kind of specialist working in alternative cancer treatments. From Valerie’s autobiography:

I don’t know how he found this so-called expert, whether it was through a recommendation of from the
Internet
. But the doctor definitely seemed like a quack. He arrived at our hotel room smoking a cigarette and carrying a bottle of wine. “That’s the doctor that’s going to help you?” I said after watching the two of them smoke and drink through the initial meeting. However, Ed was of the belief that his cancer had been caused not by cigarettes and alcohol but from a reaction between the metal in his artificial hip and a metal guitar pick he bit on during rehearsals and performances. There were fans online that elaborated on his theory, citing as possible causes electromagnetic waves, radiation attracted by the pick, and even the nickel-plating in his guitar strings that rubbed off his fingertips and into his mouth. There were also people who wouldn’t have blinked twice if Ed claimed he could turn water into wine.

In 2006, during an infamous Howard Stern radio interview (to be covered later in depth), Ed implied that the method he used to treat his cancer with Dr. Steve McClain in New York was actually illegal in the United States, but he did not clarify the statement. He noted that a significant piece of his tongue was removed—at the time, about one-third in total. He said the healthy pieces of his tongue were used to grow his cells outside of his body, and the testing was done externally rather than internally. His tongue samples were experimented on. The resulting “secret” method was then performed on Edward.

Dave’s Private Return

At this exact same time in 2000—from the dentist appointment, to UCLA, to Houston, to New York—Edward had been keeping another secret from the public. He had been working in the studio with Dave on and off for all those months.
MTV
News
reported the rumor in March. That spring, the entire original Van Halen lineup convened at 5150 two times for jam sessions of their classic material. Dave later said, “It sounded amazing.” Things went so well that they continued to work together and moved on to laying down new material. “I played him a few new tunes, we bullshitted a bit, had some laughs, and everything seemed cool,” said Eddie. “He was even kind enough to turn me on to his uncle, Jack Roth, a cancer surgeon and research specialist at, coincidentally, M.D. Anderson, in Houston, where I had been going once a week for treatment.” It would turn out that the timing of Dave’s recommendation of his uncle was likely not until after April of 2001 based on a later statement made by Dave.

By July 2000, the original VH had three songs tracked and ready to go. That same month, Michael Anthony was interviewed in the short-lived publication
Yamaha
All
Access
. He was asked who the new singer was going to be and said, “We’re saving the announcement for the right time… . It’s going to be huge. It’s a name people will know.” Still in the media spotlight, in August, Edward and Valerie were spotted taking Wolfgang out to the Britney Spears concert at the Forum and again in November at the ’N Sync concert at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Vegas.

Things for the band came to a halt around September when, for reasons easily deduced, a team of lawyers got involved to carve down into the nitty-gritty. “Everything looked pretty positive about gettin’ together,” he said. “But before you know it, attorneys are involved. These cats had me so beat down and confused, it made the cancer seem like a tiny zit on my ass. Everything seemed to fall apart after these guys got involved. I mean, we used to do it on a handshake.”

There was no official “fuck you!” this time. It simply fizzled out. The rumor mill was in full burn and churn mode for months. When a picture of Dave from about 1980 appeared on the cover of
Spin
in August, a lot of us thought it was a done deal. To pour it on, Warner Brothers reissued remastered versions of only the first six albums, boosting the sonic quality for modern sound systems. The silence throughout 2000 was deafening, even though it had actually seen the reformation of the original lineup of the band in the studio cranking out several brand new tracks—tracks that have never seen the light of day. Sammy made a lot of news running his mouth with speculative comments that Dave was back but got kicked out again and other gossip. But Ed rode out the remainder of the year being extremely quiet.

A Generous Man

In December 2000, Edward was taking golf lessons from his instructor Ron Del Barrio when Ed confronted him with an offer of outrageous generosity. As per Ron:

[Edward] “I know you’re unhappy being Mr. Golf Teacher to the Stars. I mean, people are using you, ripping you off right and left. What’s your passion? What’s your gift? What do you really think you should be doing?”

“Playing golf, working on my own game, competing,” I say.

“So why not just do it?” asks Eddie.

I tell him how much money I need each year—$1 followed by too many zeroes—to quit teaching and try to earn a Tour card.

Says Eddie, “No, you don’t understand. I know you can play. I’ve seen you hit some golf shots. I’ll give you 10 years of backing if you need it. Right now money for me is just a tool to help the people I love. I fucking love you. So let’s go!”

Eddie looks me in the eye, and I look back at him. We start crying right there and sob away like two big babies. A few weeks later I sign a contract with Eddie’s management company. I stop working with most of my teaching clients and spend most of my time working on my own game. I sign up for the satellite tournaments on the Pepsi and Buy.com tours. In my first five starts, I get five top-five finishes.

In early 2001, a follow-up exam gave Edward cause for alarm—yet another cancer scare. “Enough with the alternative clinic crap; go to the best doctors in L.A.,” said Valerie. According to Ron in May, with regard to Ed fighting cancer, he said, “[Edward] says he’s winning, that his chemo treatments appear to be working.” This is important to note as Edward later said during the infamous 2006 Stern interview that “I beat it without chemo or radiation.”

Ed attended the January 2001 NAMM convention only by video and his message was simply that the new Peavey Wolfgang guitar wasn’t ready yet and that he wanted to continue testing it until it was “bullet proof.” Michael Anthony was there in person, though, and intimated that a new album and tour might be in the works toward the end of the year. That spring, a rumor erupted that Van Halen had secretly begun booking stadiums for the fall.

Things were still not going well with Valerie and Eddie. Feeling neglected and underappreciated, Val had been carrying on an online relationship with an Atlanta businessman named Mark, whom she met through her brother David. In March, Valerie threw an Oscar watching party at their home, and Mark was in attendance. She went out of her way to dote on Mark to intentionally make Edward jealous, and it worked. Ed pulled Valerie aside and peppered her with questions about this guy, and her answers apparently placated Eddie for the time being.

For spring break, Ed, Val, and Wolfie rented a Winnebago and went on a long road trip to Arizona and back. They checked out the Grand Canyon and the Arizona meteor crater and camped out at KOA campgrounds like any other family. According to Valerie, it was one of their most ideal moments as a three-piece family.

Cancer Revealed

Dave put out a message on his website that March that said, “There’s a lot of really good rumors and some of ’em are even true about me goin’ on out there, and I would like to tell you now, that if you wanna hear the truth, the whole truth and nothing but my version of the truth, you’re only gonna hear it from me.” The mill was in a complete frenzy when Dave finally issued a public statement on April 19:

About a year ago, myself and the great Van Halen band played together once or twice and it sounded amazing. In the following several months, Edward and I — Edward Van Halen and me, David Lee Roth — created some of the most amazing, phenomenal… the hands fell off the clock, ladies and gentleman, and we wrote three astonishing tunes. That was last July, and since then I haven’t been up to the studio, we haven’t really been in touch, and we haven’t made any music. But I am holding forth; I am in the shape of my life, and I got the high note — I’m ready to go.

Only a week later, the official Van Halen website—which had not been serving the purpose of keeping the fans informed—released a personal message from Edward on April 26:

I’m sorry for having waited so long to address this issue personally. But, cancer can be a very unique and private matter to deal with. So, I think it’s about time to tell you where I’m at. I was examined by three oncologists and three head & neck surgeons at Cedars-Sinai just before spring break and I was told that I’m healthier than ever and beating cancer. Although it’s hard to say when, there’s a good chance I will be cancer free in the near future. I just want to thank all of you for your concern and support.