Falling Stars (19 page)

The
low blow wasn't completely fair, but I didn't ask for any of this. This…situation
wasn't my doing. I could see the craziness of the whole thing, but I couldn't
just walk away.
Could I? Fact was, if I was being honest, I couldn't just
walk away and it scared me.

*
* * * *

Hearing
her come out of the bathroom, I did the first thing I could think of. Closing
my eyes, I pretended like I was sleeping.
Childish? Yes, but still
effective.
When I heard her shut the door I sat up, running my hands threw
my hair. Could I be anymore juvenile? I was usually gone by this time, but I
hadn't woken up. I slept.

Actually,
I slept in. I don't know how long I sat in her bed getting the nerve to walk
out of the room.

What
do I say? I should apologize for showing up at their door so late.
That
would be the right thing to do, right?
Slowly, I threw my sweatshirt back
on, slid on my shoes, and finally got the nerve to open the door.

"Well
–" I had walked into the middle of a conversation. They all looked at me.
I froze, my apology long forgotten. All eyes were on me, except Mia. She was
sticking with our routine.

I
wish the others would. It would make this much easier.

Another
door opened and Kat walked out. She was still half-asleep. When she stopped and
looked at me then turned to look at the girls on the couch.

"Um…good
morning," Laney broke the silence and gave me a small wave with a smile.
Serena looked at her like she was crazy. Kat continued her path toward the
food.

"Help
yourself." Laney extended her hand toward the breakfast cart.

I
shook my head and practically ran for the door. I needed to get out.

Entering
my room, Nicholas and Jackson sat in the living room drinking coffee. By the
look on both of their faces, I'd interrupted another conversation this morning.
A conversation I'm sure was also about me.

"Good
morning Christopher." Nicholas spoke over his coffee cup.

I
nodded and went to my room. Quiet footsteps followed behind me. I turned
around.

"Son,
Jackson was telling me about last night." He paused searching my face. "Do
you want to talk? Is there something we can do to –?"

"I'm
fine." I growled and turned back around to my bed.

"You
call this fine?" I looked to see him pointing toward the bottle and pills
scattered across the floor.

"It
was a bad night and I tried those." I waved my hand toward the pills. "They
didn't help, as usual I might add." Roughly, I sat down on the bed.

"You
need to talk to someone Christopher. You need to tell them everything. You need
to get help." Nicholas sat next to me. "You made this deal. In order
to stay on the tour, remember?"

"I
know, I know." I sighed heavily. "What do you have in mind?"

"I
have a few grief and post traumatic counselors I think you should talk to. See
if you are comfortable with them, then we'll go from there. Okay?" He
placed a comforting pat on my back.

"Fine,"
I growled and went to shower.

Chapter
Eleven

Barely
surviving the questions following Christopher's departure, I finally got my
reprieve when we left for the studio. Una scheduled a couple more hours for us
and I couldn't wait. The day was warmer and sun filled. When were arrived to
the studio, Al was seated at his mixing table.

"Good
morning Ladies!"

"Good
Morning," We responded in unison.

"You
ready for us?" Sitting next to him, I bumped his shoulder with my own.

"Sure
am. Get your pretty asses in there and let's make some beautiful music
together," he smiled large.

Una
arrived an hour after we'd started with Xander in toe. She was on her phone the
moment she walked in until the moment we walked out of the booth.

Her
eyes landed on us and she motioned for us to sit around her while she finished
her call. We sat down and she hung up. Turning to us with excitement glinting
in her eyes, she smiled wide.

"Okay,
we'll be leaving Seattle in two days for Dallas. We rescheduled the Chicago
concert for a later date, but it will be made up."

The
excitement of getting back on tour was shortly lived when a thought occurred to
me.

"Um,
Una?"

"Yes?"
She looked up from her blackberry.

"The
song is finished, correct?"

She
nodded.

"So
I can go back on our bus right?"

She
nodded again.

"Okay,
thanks."

I'll
admit it, I felt relieved, but if I were being truly honest about my feelings
then I'd also have to admit to the disappointment. Xander, rushing us from the
studio and to the car waiting to take us back to the hotel, interrupted myself
admission. Once in our room, everyone showered and changed for dinner.

"I
say that since this is the last night we can go out, without a concert the next
day, we get our party on!" Laney gyrated her hips, and then giggled.
Laughing, I shook my head.

"I
second that motion." Kat entered the room in all her badass glory and
mimicked Laney's gyration moves.

Serena
smiled with a nod. I just shrugged. "Okay."

We
left to meet Una downstairs. On our way down, we ran into Nicholas and
The
Forgotten
in the lobby. My skin tingled with nervousness, the idea of going
to dinner with them made my stomach flip.

"Good
evening ladies."

We
greeted Nicholas with smiles. As usual, Christopher was standing in the back of
the group. No matter how strong the allure to look at him tugged at my eyes, I
avoided looking at him.

Una
arrived, looking casual gorgeous. "Are we ready to go?"

"You
know what, Una?" Laney grabbed her by the arm.

"What
Laney?" She answered with a nervous smile.

"I
think you should come out with us tonight and unwind." Laney smiled
brightly and batted her eyes at Una, who was already shaking her head. I ran
up, grabbing her by the other arm.

"You
know I think Lane is right." Tilting my head in her direction, I smiled.

"Sorry
girls, but I need my sleep." Una continued shaking her head. "We have
a lot to –"

"Well
we may just have to kidnap you then." Kat interrupted.

Turning
my head to Kat, she winked. Looking back to Una, I had to laugh at the scared
look on her face.

The
Forgotten
did end up at dinner with us. I sat between Jackson and
Una. Christopher seemed to sit as far from me as possible. His behavior was annoying
me.

Spending
most of dinner talking to Jackson, we learned we had a lot in common. Our music
taste was similar, enjoyed many of the same movies, and he had a great sense of
humor. During the conversation I, felt connected and bonded to Jackson, as if I'd
known him for years. He felt like a long lost brother.

After
dinner, Nicholas excused himself back to the hotel and Una tried to do the
same. Laney and Kat got to her before she could slip away. Each of them
grabbing an arm, they pulled her to the car.

"I
am not going out." Una protested and tried to pull away.

I
shoved her into the car and then climbed in behind her.

"It
looks to me like you are," Serena laughed and climbed into the car behind
me.

Turning
back to the door, I watched Elliott climb inside the car. He pulled Serena onto
his lap, much to her faked irritation. My laugh cut short when Jackson climbed
in and pulled me up into his lap. Laney sat on Una's lap and wrapped an arm
around her giggling. Jimmy leaned in the door.

"Kat?"
His brow rose.

She
lifted up and Jimmy slid under her. I was just about to comment on the filled
car when Elliott yelled.

"Come
on fucker get in!" My eyes snapped to the door, there was only one person
left and he hesitated before leaning in.

"There
is nowhere to sit, idiot. I'm just going to head back to the hotel." He
stood back up.

"Christ,
Christopher, just get in the fucking car, we'll make room." Jackson
reached out and pulled his arm.

"Let
go asshole." Christopher yelled back, yanking his arm away.

"Well
come-the-fuck on then." Jackson shot back.

Christopher
started to climb in with his trademark eye roll. Before I looked to confirm, I
could feel the weight of his eyes on me. Sure enough, there was the scowl of
hatred across his face. I turned my eyes away and shifted in my seat, Jackson's
lap.

"Jesus
Mia, your ass is boney," he readjusted my sitting position. The car fell
into laughter, except for Christopher.

Looking
like a clown car when we pulled up to the club, one by one we climbed out. It
was Kat and my turn to grab Una before she could run. Pulling her into the
club, it was just like entering any other club. A ton of sweating bodies packed
together and moving against each other. The music was loud, and lights flashed
around the room.

Finally
situated at a private table, we pulled Una out to the dance floor. Making sure
to circle her, we kept her from making a break for the door. Eventually, she
loosened up and started having fun. There were a lot of people and everyone was
rubbing against someone.

Elliott
and Jimmy appeared and started dancing with us. Elliott was all over Serena,
Jimmy was on Kat, and I was goofing around with Laney and Una. Jackson appeared
and started dancing with Una, which made her to blush. When Una excused herself
to get a drink, Laney and I surrounded Jackson.

Overall,
it was a great night, which ended with everyone leaving around two in the
morning for the hotel. Everyone was a little tipsy and Elliott decided to race
Jackson. He had Serena riding piggyback on him and Jackson pulled me onto his.
Elliott won and wasn't shy about rubbing it in. There were a couple of
Rocky
poses and
Loser
calls.

When
the elevator doors slid open, we separated to our own rooms. My first stop was
the shower, in desperate need to wash the sweat and the club's smell from my
skin.

Walking
back into my room, I heard a knock at my door. Already knowing who it was, I
opened the door and hesitantly motioned him to enter. He walked over and sat on
the bed before I climbed under my blanket and settled in.

All
night he'd scowled at me and treated me as if I had the plague. Now he shows up
and just expects me to be welcoming.
Of course, what did I just do? I
welcomed him in.

Guilt
began to eat at my anger, but I mean it would be different if we were friends.
You know if it was Laney or Kat I would never care, but quite honestly, we didn't
get along, didn't speak, and we never acknowledge each other, yet he just
expects me to let him climb in bed with me each night. I fell asleep wondering
what he was going to do when we got back on tour.

There
was nothing new about the following morning. Christopher was gone and I had my
bed to myself. With one large exhale, I rolled out of bed.

We
spent the early afternoon at the studio and the rest of the day getting ready
to leave. Tomorrow we would fly to Dallas where the tour bus would be waiting
after the concert. I wasn't looking forward to the flight, but getting back on
stage was worth flying.

Landing
in Dallas, we went straight to the hotel. Our arrival was expected and a crowd
had formed out front. Once we made it by the reporters and fans, we got to our
rooms. To keep the cameras and fans at arm's length, we planned to eat in the
hotel restaurant.

When
dinner was over, Laney, Kat, Xander, Serena and I congregated into the bar. We
had a portion of the bar to ourselves and confiscated a pool table. The guys
showed up after we'd been playing for a few hours. Everyone hung out drinking
beers and playing pool.

I
wasn't exactly an expert pool player and neither was Laney. Jackson showed
Laney and me some pool tricks to improve our game. Elliott was sulking because
Serena was ridiculously good and kicking his ass. Jimmy and Kat spent most of
their time sitting at a table with Christopher, watching.

Slowly
everyone drifted off for the night. Some people went alone, others went
together. I ended up sitting at the bar discussing music and books with
Jackson. It was one in the morning, when I went upstairs. Jackson walked with
me.

We
continued debating the best songs of all time on the elevator and the walk down
the hallway to our rooms.

"How
can you even validate
I Want You to Want Me
as a classic?" Jackson
exacerbated at my admission.

"Oh
my god, how can you not give credit to a song that could even get you laid if
you sang it to a girl?" I giggled loudly.