Authors: Sadie Grubor
March
arrived before we knew it and my stomach was obvious, so leaving the house had
become even less frequent. The only times I left were for the doctor appointments,
other than that one of the girls did most of the necessary errands. It was
during one of my doctor trips I was finally discovered. My world changed,
again.
I
was climbing out of the car to enter the medical building when I heard the
shutter of a camera and a male voice calling out. I groaned and hunched over,
hoping my coat would camouflage my expanding waistline.
"Mia,
are you pregnant?" "Is it Christopher Mason's baby?"
I
didn't respond. I hurried inside with Kat close at my side and a bodyguard as
protective as ever. At the end of the appointment, we tried to use a different
tactic, sure that more cameramen would be waiting in the alley. My guard called
for another car and escorted us through the parking garage exit.
We
stepped from the elevator and flashes and questions swarmed around me. I'd
never had so many cameras shoved in my face or so many people talking to me at
one time. It was terrifying. Instinctively, I cradled my stomach. Kat wrapped
an arm around my shoulders.
"Damn
leeches," she growled. "Get back!" she yelled at a couple of
forward photogs. My guard extended an arm and knocked the two guys back into
the crowd.
"Keep
your distance." His deep voice boomed against the cement walls of the
parking garage.
"When
is the baby due?" "How do you feel about being a single mother?"
"What was your reaction to Chris leaving you for another woman while
carrying his child?"
I
couldn't fight the tears I started to shed. Kat held me tighter.
"Don't
listen to them," she whispered into my ear. How could I not listen? They
were yelling it.
We
made it halfway to the car when the crowd had acquired more photographers and
passer-bys. Security was doing his best to get them to back off, but it was
just too much. Fear coursed through me as the crowd pressed closer.
I
squealed when my security guard lifted me up bridal style and carried me toward
the car. The group was still relentless with the questions, but they weren't
going to stand in the way of his large body forging forward. We finally got to
the car and pulled away. I cried the entire way back home.
The
next day the photogs words crept back into my head. "What was your
reaction to Chris leaving you for another woman while you are carrying his
child?" I knew it was stupid, but I was desperate and scared. I got online
and started my search.
At
first, the only image I saw was a picture taken when security carried me
through the garage, but next to the photo of me were the photos I hoped wouldn't
be there. Chris was sitting closely with a red haired woman. I choked on a sob
and clicked on the picture. It brought up and entire gallery of shots: Chris
and this woman sitting on a porch at sunset, them leaning in toward each other
like they were about to kiss, both of them laughing with their heads tossed back,
and finally came a picture of them embracing. My body began to shake with
silent sobs. I shoved my laptop from the table. The noise of it crashing to the
floor got Kat's attention. She rushed in and found me in hysterics.
It
took three hours for Serena and Kat to calm be down enough to cry myself to
sleep. While they tried to reassure me he wouldn't do that, they were sure it
was something blown out of proportion, but there was a small tone to Serena’s
voice that told me she was trying to convince herself too. Kat slept with me
for the next two nights while I suffered nightmares.
A
couple of days after my breakdown Kat, Laney, and I were sitting together on
the couch while I picked at Chinese food and wathced yet another horror movie. Laney
had her hand on my stomach waiting to feel the baby kick again when there was a
loud scuffle outside.
"You
need to wait out here." Security order loudly. I glanced to Kat and then
to Laney. We both looked toward the door when Laney got up to check it out.
"I
don't have to wait!" Another muffled voice argued back.
"Yes
you do!" The door slammed and then security stormed into the living room. "Mia,
there's someone here to see you…" he hesitated "I'm not sure if you
want to see him."
I
stood from the couch with a furrowed brow and headed toward the door.
"Mia,"
he put his hand on my shoulder "I can get rid of him." I smiled and
placed my hand on his.
"It's
okay." I took a deep breath and headed toward the door. My heart ached for
Christopher to be standing on the other side of the door. I hadn't seen or
heard from him in over a month. I knew he was getting help, but I also thought
he would be his typical rebellious self and find a way. Then the reporter's
words came back to haunt me.
"What was your reaction to Chris leaving
you for another woman while you are carrying his child?"
I wanted him
to be there just so I could spit on him and slam the door in his pretty,
cheating face.
Placing
my hand on the doorknob, I twisted and pulled. My breath caught in my throat
and the urge of a sob in my throat.
"Xander,"
I breathed out. He grabbed me into a hug.
"It's
good to see you," he chuckled. I wiped away one tear I didn't want him to
see.
With
each passing day, anger was starting to replace the heartache I held for
Christopher. I sighed quietly and put on my smile.
"How
are you?" I smiled.
"I'm
great actually," he smiled. "I’ve brought some things from Nobil."
He moved out of the doorway and a couple large men carried a boxed up cradle
and some other baby gifts.
I
smiled widely.
"Thank
you," I wiped another tear away. "And thank Una for me too."
Xander
stayed for a couple of hours chatting. It was through him that I discovered
Christopher would be out of rehab soon.
After
he left, Kat, Lane, and I went to bed. That night I fell asleep dreaming once
again of Christopher and wondering if he would show up here.
Did I want to
see him?
The
next morning, I placed a call to Una. I needed another place to stay –
somewhere secluded and secure.
*
* * * *
I
fought for two weeks against the fucking rehab Nicholas and Dr. J forced me
into, but I eventually caved a little. In rehab, I’d been introduced to Doctor
Sebastian. She was a specialist with anger management and had experience with
troubled children. Dr. J and she became my routine. One day was therapy with
Dr. J and the next was group therapy where I refused to participate. Then there
was a day of 'group activity' and I would be damned if I was going to go hiking
or whatever the fuck they did together. The end of my week was a rotation of
Dr. S and Dr. J. They also assigned me a 'mentor' for my stay.
Shay,
my mentor, had turned out to be decent. She reminded me a little of Kat
sometimes. Shay had come to rehab eight years ago, an aspiring model that had
developed a drug and alcohol problem. It took three rounds and her finally stepping
away from the pressures of fame in her prior life to get completely clean. Then
she decided to go back to school and work to help others get clean and healthy.
Four
more weeks pass by and I was finally able to sign myself out without Nicholas
giving me hell. The therapy had been intense with both Dr. J and Dr. S digging
around deeper into my past and forcing me to face my anger problems. Even
though I was free now, I still felt like shit and hated myself. I knew what I
needed.
"I'm
going to Whidbey Island," I said sitting across from Nicholas in the car.
"She's
not there," he answered quietly.
"What
do you mean?" I panicked.
"I
mean that she's not in Whidbey Island anymore," he shrugged and started to
mess with his blackberry.
I
smacked the blackberry out of his hand.
"Where
the hell is she Nicholas?" I growled.
"I
don't know," he gave me a stern look, "and you are making me
reconsider agreeing to your release from rehab."
"I'm
not allowed to get angry at all now?"
"I
don't know where she is. I just know she isn't at her house anymore." He
scowled and bent forward to pick his phone up from the car floor.
"Why
don't I believe you?" I crossed my arms over my chest.
"I
honestly don't know," he sighed heavily. "I know that she left not
too long ago, perhaps a week." his sentence drifted off there.
I
sighed and put my hand through my hair.
"Fuck!"
When
we got to my home, I threw my things on my bed and sat down. I looked around my
room. It was cold, empty, and didn't feel like home anymore. Grabbing my duffle
bag, I pulled out my cell on the way to my car.
"Christopher
where—?" Nicholas's question cut off when I shut the door behind me.
First,
I tried Mia, no answer. Serena, no answer. Laney, nothing. Then I called Jackson.
"Hey
man," he answered. "How are you, stranger?"
"Hey
Jackson, I'm okay. I'll be a lot better if you can tell me where—"
"I
can't," he said quietly.
"What
the fuck do you mean you can't?" I screamed into the phone.
"Honestly,
I don't know where she is, Christopher. No one talks about where she went. They
talk to her on the phone and when anyone visits her none of us are invited,"
he answered.
"So,
she all alone?"
How could they let her be all by herself?
"No,
Kat’s with her."
"Fuck,"
I groaned. "Who knows where to find her?"
"No
one that would tell you, I'm sorry." We quickly said goodbye and hung up.
I was desperate so I called Una. Surprisingly she answered.
"Christopher?"
"Where
is she?"
"You
know I can't—"
"Please,
Una. Please."
"I'll
tell her you want to see her Chris, but I can't guarantee she'll want that,"
she answered very businesslike.
"Fine,"
I sighed. I wouldn't get anywhere else with her, so I had to take what I could
get, for now.
I
drove around for hours trying to figure out what to do. When I was close to the
studio, I got an idea. I parked quickly and headed into the lobby. There she
was. Her face lit up as I walked toward her.
"Hey
Chrissie," Tonya beamed.
"Hey
Ton," I replied and leaned onto the front desk.
"I
haven't seen you for a while." She purred. I forced a smile. "Can I
help you with something?" She leaned forward and squeezed her arms under
her breast, pushing them up and giving me an easy access view down her shirt. I
fought not to roll my eyes.
"I
think you can," I smirked down at her.
After
thirty minutes of coaxing her, I finally got into Una's office. Once Tonya was
out of my way, I hurried through Una's things. There were a couple of files
with papers about leased properties. I jotted down the information and left
her office.
Before
leaving the studio, I used Tonya's computer to do some research. First, I searched
for Mia. Once the bright pink website was in my face, I saw her going into a
restaurant located about an hour or so from Seattle. It looked like she was
with Kat.
So she didn’t go too far.
After
a few more searches, I found the restaurant and decided I was heading in that
direction. As I closed the multiple search windows, I stopped on one of the
sites. My heart lurched when read the words underneath the photo.
'
Mia
Ryder collapses at the news of her cheating baby daddy'
My
stomach knotted. I didn't want to read, but I couldn't stop myself. Underneath
the photo of Mia cradled in a security guys arms was more information about her
departure from a medical building.
'
When
asked,
what her comments were about Christopher Mason leaving her alone and pregnant
to run around with a hot little red head, she collapsed. Her muscle man was
there to catch her and whisk her away from the crowd
.'
Then
there was a second photo. It was fuzzy and blurred from blowing up the size,
but I knew who was in the picture. It was me, sitting on the deck with Shay.
Those fucking troublemakers had completely blown the whole scene out of
proportion. I could only hope Mia hadn't seen this crap and, if she had, that
she didn't believe any of it.
Halfway
through my drive I received a text message from Una.
'I'm
sorry Christopher. She said she'll let you know about the baby when she's
ready.'
"Fuck
that." I shouted to the empty car and tossed my phone into the passenger
seat.
Finding
a hotel near the restaurant, I forced myself to sleep for the night. It was a
rough night filled with bad dreams.