Fashionably Dead Down Under (19 page)

“Good evening,” Satan shouted joyously from
the doorway. He’d chosen his entrance well. The backlighting from
the hallway bathed him in a golden glow, creating the illusion of
an entire body halo. I grinned at his audacity. He was a first
class beautiful bastard and I liked him. “Theodore, please share
the rules with our guests.”

One of the Demons stepped to the middle of
the room. Satan waltzed in and trapped Amanda in a passionate
embrace. Watching the Devil seduce a woman was like watching live
porn. Holy Hell, I bit down on my lip to keep from shouting, “Get a
room.” The Sins did some massive eye rolling and Cole turned away
in embarrassment or disgust—I couldn’t tell which.

Theodore cleared his throat and Satan ended
his little performance. “There shall be one winner. There will be
ten rounds. The player with the most wins shall be the champion. If
the winner is not Satan,” Theodore paused dramatically, “the winner
will decide the parameters in the deal with the Devil. If Satan
wins, he shall make a deal with each and every one of you.”
Theodore stepped back to his spot.

“What the hell kind of rules are those?”
Dante demanded petulantly. “I call bullshit.”

“Then leave,” Satan said and everyone froze.
“But, Dante
my friend
, if you leave you shall never be
allowed back.”

Dante cleared his throat several times and
shifted back and forth. His gaze narrowed and his face turned an
unbecoming shade of red. “I can abide by the rules,” he muttered
and took a seat at the table.

“You’re a fucking opportunist asshole, but
I’m in,” Hemingway bellowed with a shit eating grin on his
face.

“Carl,” Satan instructed. “Please bring
Ernest a fresh martini. Use the chilled glasses and the cold
onions. And make it dry.”

“Good man,” Hemingway grunted as he took his
seat. “Good man.”

“Now, neighbor, while I do find your rules a
bit slanted in your favor, I’ve been looking forward to this for
months. I’m in,” Mister Rogers said sweetly. “And Carl, if it’s not
too much trouble, I’d love a glass of milk and some cookies.”

“Thath no trouble at all, thir,” Carl said,
bowing to Mister Rogers.

“Thank you.”

Ethan said nothing. He walked to the table
and took his seat. Damn, he was hot. Unfortunately all my cousins
and the skank-ass Amanda thought so too. Lust couldn’t keep her
eyes off of him and it made me feel a little crazy.

“
Green doesn’t become you
,” Ethan
said.

“
Everything becomes me
,” I snapped.
His chuckle bounced around inside my head and I almost slapped him
until he sent a visual of what he planned to do to me later this
evening. “
Okay, fine. I won’t kill her, but I want to
.”

His wink made me smile. He was mine. I had
nothing to worry about.

“Let the games begin,” my uncle said.

The atmosphere shifted quickly to intense in
complete juxtaposition to Journey’s greatest hits that spilled out
of the hidden speakers. I watched the players, but I also watched
the peanut gallery. Cole kept his eyes firmly on Amanda as she
stared moon eyed at my uncle. He clearly didn’t trust her and I was
curious what he knew. Dante kept glancing up at the Sins. From
where I stood, it was unclear who he was making eye contact with.
It was either Sloth or Greed. Greed. It was definitely Greed.
Interesting. Was she helping him cheat? Would those girls work
against their father?

Carl, Janet and Myrtle quietly made sure
drinks were full and no one went without as many weenies as they
wanted. Janet placed a large plate of pigs in a blanket next to
Satan and he savored them the same way some enjoy fine caviar.
Bizarre. Hemingway threw back his martinis and Carl kept them
coming at the Devil’s discreet nods. I was certain the drinks got
stronger and stronger.

Dante sipped wine and Mister Rogers drank his
milk and ate his cookies. Ethan was the only one who ingested
nothing. He was of a Vampyre age that he could enjoy a blood-laced
beverage, but that was not on the menu. The first two hands went to
Ethan and the second two to Satan.

“Why have we lowered ourselves to play with
Vampyres?” Dante groused, slamming his hand down. “Are we slumming
it now?”

“Touché, Dante,” Satan said in an overly
polite manner. “Perhaps next time we can play on level eight or
seven or six . . . Ahhh, but wait, they don’t exist.”

Dante’s fists clenched and his jaw worked
overtime. “Pardon my rudeness,” he ground out. “It was thoughtless
of me.”

Ethan simply nodded and then ignored him.
Mister Rogers shook his head sadly and Hemingway burst into
laughter.

“My God, man, relax. It’s a game. We’re
playing with the Devil–why not throw a Vampyre in for good
measure?” Hemingway said and signaled to Carl for another round.
“Who cares if you lose? I’ve been making deals with the goddamn
Devil my whole life . . . what’s one more?”

“Well said.” Satan grinned at the famous
writer and glanced over and winked at me.

It was the first time he had acknowledged my
presence this evening and I’d be a liar if I said it didn’t thrill
me. My uncle was a magical evil man. He was temptation and all the
sins of his daughters rolled into one. The safety I felt in his
company was a lie. I needed to remember that everything down here
was a game and the stakes were high.

Ironically Mister Rogers won the next two
hands, and that’s when that slut Lust made her move.

“Daddy,” she purred. “I have a bit of a
headache. Would you excuse me for a bit? I promise to be back.”

“Of course,” Satan said absently as he
examined his cards.

Lust stood slowly and stretched. Every eye in
the room except her father’s was on her. She ran her hands down her
body, spending a little extra time on her boobies. The guards were
almost salivating and poor Mister Rogers looked like he might pass
out. Ethan watched her in the same detached way I did and it was
clear she didn’t like that one bit. As she sauntered past the table
she ran her hands over Ethan’s shoulders and tangled them into his
hair. Leaning forward, she kissed his neck. He roughly shoved her
away as her sisters laughed. She hissed her displeasure and left
the room in a huff.

Satan glanced up from his cards, having
missed the exchange. He looked curiously at Cole, who gave him the
‘everything’s okay’ look and he went back to his cards. Cole might
think everything was okay, but I did not. It was time for the bitch
to pay.

“I’ll be right back,” I muttered and quickly
made my way to the door. Wrath smiled viciously. Shit, she wanted
me to go kick her sister’s ass. Well, I hate to disappoint so I
gave her a curt nod and left.

“
Astrid
,” Ethan said tersely. “
Do
not do anything stupid
.”

“
Don’t worry, honey. I got it
covered
.”

Son of a bitch, where did she go? I scanned
the long hallway in frustration. Feeling helpless and human was not
working for me—time to tap into my power free-for-all and let the
chips land wherever they wanted. Lust was not getting away this
time.

Finding my anger wasn’t difficult. It was
right on the surface, but I needed to dig deeper. I was asking my
power to help me find something, not to destroy it. Although when I
found her, all bets were off. The chant that I’d heard Grandpa say
was caught in the far recesses of my mind. The angrier I got the
further away it floated.

“Shit, why aren’t there ever any fucking
directions?” I groaned. The book Grandpa had given me had no guide
on how to use my power. I was in Hell . . . fury should work.
Shouldn’t it? Wait. Balance . . . the balance between good and
evil. Is that what I needed to find? Probably, but how was I
supposed to do that? Forget it. I had to go with what I knew. My
Vampyre skills were no longer dormant. However, I was worried that
I’d need my Demon magic to truly deal with Lust. Shitshitshit. I
closed my eyes, took a deep breath, let my mind wander outside of
myself and slip into hers.

Got it. WTF? Lust was a riot of fury and
emotion, but I knew exactly where she was. Unable to decipher any
kind of linear thought from the commotion going on inside her, I
turned to the right and moved with Vampyre speed in the direction
she’d gone. What exactly I had planned when I found her . . . I had
no clue, but she was going to lay off my mate. Period.

I almost laughed as I realized I avoided the
talking walls. What I wouldn’t give for the walls to speak right
now. That would mean Grandpa was near, but that was impossible. He
was in Nirvana doing the nasty with Gigi. The visuals were too
disturbing so I shoved that sucker to the back of my mind and
hummed along with Journey’s
Any Way You Want It
.

As I drew closer my body trembled with
excitement. The black glittering gloves appeared and I was drunk
with power and fury. Wait. What the fuck was I doing? Was I really
going to go a have a bitch fight over a man with my cousin? I
froze. Ethan was mine. Lust was no threat to me. None—but the rage
inside me demanded blood. Shaking my head, I tried to clear it. I
had never been this person before. Vengeance and hate were
alarmingly appealing to me. Is this what Hell did to people? Part
of me cared, but a larger part of me didn’t. Was I even in control
of myself?

I stopped and leaned against the wall,
letting my body slide to the floor. All I wanted to do was go home.
Mortified by my desires, I sucked in several deep breaths and
calmed down. I’d go back to the poker room and avoid Lust at all
costs. She was not my nemesis. She was not a threat. She was an
annoyance that didn’t deserve my ire or the luxury of thought. If I
could find it in myself to feel sorry for her, I’d really win, but
I wasn’t quite that magnanimous at the moment. I’d get there in a
year or two...or ten.

“I knew you’d follow me,” Lust hissed,
standing over me with crazy written all over her.

“Oh my God,” I shouted. “I changed my mind
and you’re about to fuck that up.” I stood and took a step away.
Bad move. She was on me like a bad toupee.

“He was mine first. He’ll be mine again. You
don’t hold a candle to me,” she ground out through clenched teeth.
“You’re in my way and I want you gone.”

So much for taking the high road . . . “You
are delusional.” I laughed at her and she tensed in like a bomb
about to explode. “You’ve been used so many times you probably give
out frequent rider miles.”

“Did you just use a ‘yo mama’ joke on me?”
she yelled. Her face burned red and her fingertips sparked.

“Yep. Yep, I did.” I grinned. “And I have
more where that came from. Ethan is not yours. Never has been and
never will be. Look, I get that you’re horny, but you need to find
someone who will appreciate your widely spread talents.”

“My
talents
made him come till he
begged for mercy and I’ll have him begging again as soon as I get
rid of you. You’re just a stupid weak half-breed and I always get
what I want.”

Pushing the image of Lust and Ethan naked
together aside was difficult, but since she was coming at me like a
freight train, I had no choice. I tapped the angel wing tattoo on
my chest, a gift from my Baby Demons, and prepared myself to either
kick some ass or get mine handed to me.

Her anger made her sloppy. I stood completely
still and let her advance. Right before she landed a mean right
hook, I dropped low and took her out with my leg. The thud of her
body hitting the wall and then the ground was music to my ears.
Rolling over, I brought my elbow down on her face and took complete
pleasure in the sound of bone crunching.

“Bitch,” she screeched and raised her arms to
the sky. A strong stream of sparks flew from her hands, but as she
stood she was unsteady on her feet. Blood poured from her nose and
lip. “You’re going to pay for that.”

“You really don’t want another piece of me,”
I panted and rolled my eyes. I stayed low in case she tried again.
What I wouldn’t give for a sword or a throwing star.

“No, I don’t want any part of you, but I know
some people who might.” She flung her arms in a circular motion and
a shimmering door appeared. It was translucent and golden flames
licked up the sides. There was no heat and I wasn’t sure if it was
real or a mirage . . . Lust vanished and I had a bad feeling I was
fucked. I backed myself against the wall and began to inch away.
Why did I follow her out? Ethan was so damned right about green not
being my color. It was an outstanding lesson, but would I live to
tell? I didn’t for one second believe she was gone. With my back
plastered against the wall I had slightly better odds of seeing
where she might attack from next. Of course from behind was the
last thing I expected, but I was in Hell—a place where all your
night-fucking-mares can come true.

She flew out of the wall and shoved me
through the door with such force my head snapped back and I saw
stars.

“Say hello to your mommy for me,” she hissed
as flames engulfed me. “It was good knowing you. I promise to take
very, very good care of Ethan.”

Fucking. Awesome. The crazy slut was sending
me to the Basement and I had a feeling no one would be happy to see
me there. I killed their leader, my disgusting daddy, and I was
certain that as happy as Satan was about that, the nut jobs in the
Basement would not agree.

***

I thought the waiting area of Hell was
creepy, but it had nothing on the Basement. The ride through the
portal had been violent, smelly and hot. While the flames didn’t
disfigure me, they practically destroyed my Prada halter. My boobs
were being held up by threads.
Great
. Gonna flash my goodies
at some evil Demons. Never thought I put those words together in a
sentence. Ever.