Forgiveness (35 page)

I forgive myself for judging my brother/sister as

I forgive myself for judging my brother/sister when

– I F
ORGIVE
M
YSELF FOR
B
ELIEVING
–

EXAMPLE

I forgive myself for believing all the gossip my uncle has told me about my brother.

I forgive myself for believing

about my brother/sister.

I forgive myself for believing

about my brother/sister.

I forgive myself for believing

about my brother/sister.

I forgive myself for believing

about my brother/sister.

– T
APPING
S
EQUENCE
–

Review Basic
Tapping Sequence
Guidelines.

1. Review each of the day’s 12 Forgiveness Statements out loud. This will help you identify the specific aspects of the issue that you want to tap on.
   
2. Rate the intensity level of any unforgiveness you hold about today’s topic on a scale of 1 to 10. Write the number down.
   
3. Neutralize all subconscious resistance. Repeat a Reversal Statement 3 times while tapping continuously on the Karate Chop point.
   
4. Focus on the issue you’ll be tapping on. Repeat a Set-Up Statement 3 times while tapping continuously on the Karate Chop point.
   
5. Tap 7 times on each of the 10 meridian points while repeating out loud the key details from the 12 Forgiveness Statements. This process can be modeled on the bonus Tapping Scripts.
   
6. Recheck the intensity level of any unforgiveness you hold about today’s topic. Write the number down. If the level is at 8 or higher, repeat the entire sequence. If the level is less than 8, tap on a Modified Set-Up Statement, then perform the 10-point Tapping Sequence on your 12 Forgiveness Statements until you are at a 0 level of intensity.
   

– R
EFLECTIONS
–

To forgive does not mean to condone.

—A
LLAN
L
OKOS
,
P
ATIENCE
: T
HE
A
RT OF
P
EACEFUL
L
IVING

– DAY 16 –

I F
ORGIVE
M
Y
S
ON
/D
AUGHTER

I am entrusted with the gifts of God.

The gifts of God are mine, entrusted to my care. God’s trust in me is limitless. I am entrusted with giving happiness and love, doing God’s will on earth. Only by sharing God’s love for me, by loving all whom I will, I realize I have received the love of God.

—P
RAYER FOR
A C
OURSE IN
M
IRACLES
W
ORKBOOK
L
ESSON
335

– Forgiveness Story by Iyanla Vanzant –

S
he was my baby girl, the last of three. Like every other mother, I thought she was the most adorable baby in the world. She was also a good baby. She slept through most of the night and was never a fussy eater. Her brother and sister helped her to crawl around and stand up early. She started walking the same day her first two teeth showed up. The toddler years were easy. Her adolescence was basically uneventful. Then we hit the teenage years, and all hell broke loose.

No matter what I said, it turned into an argument. She was the first of the three to be openly defiant. I think her siblings were as shocked as I was about the things she said and did. Following in my footsteps, she got pregnant at age 16.

Although she finished high school, my baby girl decided not to go to college. She left home and lived with her boyfriend. I usually heard from her when she had a problem. This meant that there were weeks, sometimes months, when we didn’t speak. In her mind, I was wrong … about everything. In my mind, she was a disappointment. By the time she was 30 I realized that one of us needed to get off our position and mend the fences or we would miss a lot more of each other’s life.

It’s always the mother who has to give in. I promise you, I did my best. She was having none of it. I was living in another state when I realized … I miss my baby girl.

Like so many parents, I had hopes and dreams and wishes for all of my children. I wanted so much for them and expected so much from them. I also had lots of opinions that I thought they needed to follow. My way was the best way. After all, I am the momma!

As hard as it is to admit, I judged my children as good/bad, right/wrong, respectful/disrespectful based on how well they walked the lines I had drawn. I tried so hard to keep them from failing that I failed to give them what they needed to succeed. These were truths I had to face and deal with. I had to examine my opinions, judgments, and criticisms of my children; forgive myself; and ask them for forgiveness. More important, I had to see the best in them, no matter what they chose for themselves.

I
TRIED SO HARD TO KEEP THEM FROM FAILING THAT
I
FAILED TO GIVE THEM WHAT THEY NEEDED TO SUCCEED
.

The eldest two were more than amenable. They actually believed I had done the best I could. The baby girl, the one who was most like me, had a much harder time. She was suspicious and still very angry. She still didn’t want my input. She was her own woman, with her own way of being and her own life to live. Deeper into forgiveness I went. More judgments did I find. In the end, I realized that the more I forgave myself, the closer we became; and the closer we became, the more judgments I had to forgive. What’s a mother to do?

D
AILY
F
ORGIVENESS
P
ROCESS
R
EMINDERS

For a more detailed explanation of the
Daily Forgiveness Process Guidelines
,

1. Find a quiet place where you will not be disturbed for at least 30 to 60 minutes.
   
2. Still your mind for at least 5 minutes or listen to the
   Stillness Meditation.
   
3. Read the Forgiveness Prayer once silently and once aloud.
   
4. Scan the
   Emotional Triggers
   List.
   
5. Write out the 12 Forgiveness Statements for each day’s topic on thinking, judging, and believing in your Forgiveness Journal (Days 1–18). Write your Forgiveness Letters (Days 19–21).
   
6. Perform your Pro EFT™ Forgiveness Tapping Sequences.
   
7. Process thoughts and feelings consciously through your Forgiveness Journal Reflections.
   
8. Listen to the
   Gratitude Meditation
   on the Forgiveness CD.
   
9. Complete the day’s practice in quiet reflection or with meditative music.
   
10. Be sure to do something good for yourself today!
    

I F
ORGIVE
M
YSELF FOR
J
UDGING
M
Y
S
ON
/D
AUGHTER

T
oday’s forgiveness practice is for parents who have judgments and disappointments related to their children, even if they are adults. Parents often have dreams for their children that are not the same as the dreams the children have for themselves. When children strike out on their own in their lives, doing things differently than the parents would do them or advise them to do, it can cause a breakdown in the relationship.

P
ARENTS OFTEN HAVE DREAMS FOR THEIR CHILDREN THAT ARE NOT THE SAME AS THE DREAMS THE CHILDREN HAVE FOR THEMSELVES
.

Parents forget that their children, especially adult children, are under no obligation to walk their path. Today’s practice offers parents the opportunity to free themselves and their children from customs, traditions, rules, and regulations that may have them bound to dysfunction. Work on each of your children for one complete practice. Don’t be afraid to be absolutely honest!

A P
RAYER OF
F
ORGIVENESS

Blessed and Divine Father God, Holy and Merciful Mother God:

Thank You for trusting me with the tasks and duties of being a parent. Thank You for the blessing that my son/daughter is in my life. Thank You for establishing and sustaining a bond of love between us that cannot be broken, that is life-sustaining, that is whole and holy. Today, I ask that You will bless my son’s/daughter’s mind to be free from all doubts in himself/herself and in You. Bless my son/daughter with a kind heart. I ask that You write Your will upon his/her heart and call it into his/her mind according to our perfect timing. I ask that You give my son/daughter courage and wisdom. Give him/her strength. Give him/her the desire to do what is good and right at all times, in all situations, and under all circumstances. Thank You, God, for loving my child even more than I do. Thank You for protecting my child, our child, from all hurt, harm, and danger.

Into Your hands I commit him/her.

I rest in Thee.

I let it be!

And so it is!