Girl of Mine (27 page)

“You didn’t expect the consequences of your actions.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“You were giving me to him. You were handing me to him on a silver platter. How could you do that?” It felt good to scream the words, to let out her sorrow, and she was suddenly thankful for the downpour which allowed her to express her feelings wildly without feeling out of control.

Luke wiped the water from his face, his expression raw. “It was your choice, Jill. I didn’t make you say yes to Troy. You did that all on your own. Do you have any idea how that made me feel?” Jill had never heard Luke raise his voice at her. The storm forced him to shout out his feelings, as if he were livid, when she knew he wasn’t.

Instead she felt surprised at his angst.

“Am I supposed to feel sorry for
you
now?” Jill shrieked, moving closer and craning her neck until they were practically nose to nose. Wasn’t she the one who was supposed to be mad?

The wind blew, the rain pounded around them, yet they were oblivious, caught up in their own storm. Luke ignored the water drizzling down his face as he said, “I’m not asking you to feel anything you don’t want to feel. The power to choose your fate has always been in your hands.”

“Yeah right, after a little guidance and manipulation from you and Troy.” Jill pushed her wet hair out of her eyes.

“No one forced you to do anything.” Speaking as loudly as they were, Luke’s words seemed harsh and callous, yet his eyes were soft and tender. His sincerity took her aback.

“I was lost without you. You had to know how vulnerable I would be, that it would influence my decision.”

“I was wrong to leave you without an explanation. I know that now.”

“Yes, you were.”

“Did you kiss him?” he shouted, his features twisting slightly, revealing his anguish. Jealousy was rearing its ugly head.

“What did you expect? We became engaged!”

“That doesn’t answer my question. Did you kiss him? I have to know.”

Jill realized he
really
hadn’t expected anything to develop between her and Troy. “No! We never kissed. It wasn’t like that.”

“Then why did you say yes, Jill? Why?” he repeated. It was driving him crazy, this compulsion to know the answer.

Jill wasn’t so sure he deserved to know. “None of your business.”

“It is my business. Everything about you is my business. I need to know. Tell me why!”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It does. I love you, Jill. I can’t live without you. Now tell me why you said yes.”

“You said it yourself already, I have a soft heart. Too soft for my own good.”

“You do. But it wouldn’t make you do something you don’t want to do. I know you better than that.”

True. “Don’t you get it?” Jill yelled.

“No, I don’t.”

“You’re so blind.”

“I am. I can’t see anything but you.”

“You are a fool.”

“I admit it. I am. A fool for you.”

Finally the words he wanted to hear slipped past her lips. “Troy is a part of you and you are a part of Troy. You’ve been best friends all of your lives. Don’t you understand? Troy was the closest to you I’d ever be again in my life. It was my way of holding onto you. I knew you’d come home to him. I knew you’d be at his side before he passed. And I’d be with you again. I’d see you again and I’d hear your voice again. It was all I had left. I did it for you! For you, Luke. I did it for you!” Jill collapsed to her knees, sobbing so hard she thought she’d pass out. Their conversation of the last several hours had left her utterly depleted, emotionally and physically.

Luke fell to his knees in front of her and pulled her close. With his lips close to her ear, she heard him say, “I never thought of that. It didn’t even cross my mind. I thought you fell in love with him. A rebound relationship, but I thought I’d lost you.”

“No, no, no.” Jill clutched at his back, pulling him closer. With the way she’d illogically tried to avoid him when he’d returned, it was no wonder he’d thought such a thing.

Both half crying and half laughing, he kissed her lips, her nose, her cheeks, her forehead, and then back to her lips. The rain poured from the sky, drowning them, saturating them, and engulfing them.

“I love you, Jill, I love you.”

“I love you, Luke.”

“Can you forgive me for being so stupid?”

Yes, she could. He’d already redeemed himself in her eyes.

He came home just for her.

What more could she ask for? “I already have.”

“Marry me. Marry me right now. Tonight. I can’t leave without making you mine. We’ll get through the next year somehow.”

“Yes. Yes, yes, yes.”

Luke’s lips found hers, wet and cold. Their mouths opened to each other’s as they sought each other’s warmth. They kissed and they gasped for breath as the water poured down their faces and they ignored it, reveled in it, celebrated it. Anger and sadness at his actions washed away. He loved her and, in the end, that was all that mattered. She was willing to forgive.

His reasons for explaining his story from the very beginning all made sense now. If he hadn’t told her his and Troy’s story from the beginning, his decision would have been inexplicable.

“Let’s get you inside,” Luke hollered. He picked her up and carried her back to the ranch house. Once inside he set her down, but didn’t let her go. He pulled her close and pushed his lips to hers. They kissed until Jill’s shivering began to interfere. Luke grabbed a throw blanket from the couch and wrapped it around her, holding her against his chest until her chattering teeth subsided.

“Marry me tonight?” he whispered, perhaps unsure if he’d heard her correctly earlier.

“Yes.”

“We’ll catch the red eye to Vegas. We’ll only have one day together. But I’ll make it up to you, I swear I will.”

“One glorious day.” Jill buried her lips in his neck, absorbing his warmth.

“Am I being utterly selfish to ask this of you?”

“No, it’s what I want too.”

“What if . . .”

“Don’t say it. You’ll come home. I know you will.” Jill’s teeth chattered again.

“Go change into warm clothes. I’ll make some hot chocolate and start a fire. You need to warm up.”

“Okay.”

Jill changed quickly, throwing on sweats. Her mind whirled with the events of the day. It was an awful lot to swallow in one afternoon. Was she forgiving Luke too easily?

Perhaps.

But the sincerity of the situation was written on his face and she couldn’t disregard his genuine apology. He knew he’d made a mistake and he’d gone to great lengths to redeem himself. He’d never intended to “give” her to Troy. The circumstances had escalated and wandered out of his control. Withholding forgiveness would only torture him. He’d suffered enough with the torment of his decision. And she wanted him as much as he wanted her.

It was enough.

By the time she emerged, Luke already had the hot chocolate ready and a roaring fire in the fireplace. He’d turned on every battery operated candle his mother had so fortuitously left for them. The rain still persisted outside, making the ranch house cozy and warm. Her hair still dripped huge droplets of water. Luke grabbed a towel and worked it through her hair, as well as his own. They settled themselves in front of the fireplace, face to face, grinning at each other as the hot chocolate warmed them from the inside. Jill suddenly felt deliriously happy. It would appear Luke felt the same.

Luke set his mug down. “I have a confession to make.”

“Honestly, I don’t think I can handle anymore confessions, Luke. Keep this one to yourself.”

He chuckled lightly. “Can’t. From here on out, there will be no more secrets between us.”

“Okay, I’m good with that. Let’s hear it.”

“There are other things that influenced my decision.”

Her stomach tightened. “Okay.”

“Don’t look so worried. It’s not what you think.”

Jill finished her hot chocolate. Luke had had three days before he’d left for war. Now that she was thinking clearly, she could see that his decision had been made under duress. She wondered if he recognized that fact. “Go on.”

“I worried that a year or more apart would be too difficult for us.”

“I’m not gonna lie, it
will
be difficult. I hate that we have to be separated. But it doesn’t change anything. I love you and I want to be your wife.”

His features visibly relaxed. “Did I mention I’m in love with you?”

“Yes. But I never tire of hearing it, so say it all you want.”

He leaned forward and in between light kisses, he whispered, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

“Anything else I need to know?” Jill asked.

“Yes, actually.”

“Now what?”

“I convinced myself you’d be disappointed to not have your perfect wedding. I couldn’t do that to you. I felt so selfish forcing a quickie wedding on you, especially after all the work you’d done. I began to think it would be best to wait until I was home. I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

“Oh Luke, I don’t care about the dumb wedding. All I care about is you. In the end, that’s all that matters.”

Luke held her face, cupping her cheeks. “That’s all I needed to hear.”

Although it was only about four in the afternoon, the sky had turned dark and gloomy. After a particularly loud crack of lightning, the lights went out as they lost electricity.

They didn’t worry about it. They didn’t even go to check the breaker box. Instead, he pressed his lips to hers as they collapsed before the fire, surrounded by candles. To Jill it felt like the epitome of romance; the quintessential romantic moment.

“Perfect timing,” Luke mumbled. Shadows cast themselves about the ranch house, dancing in the firelight.

“It’s our wedding day, Luke. It really is our wedding day.”

Jill felt him smile against her lips. “Today had to be the day. It just had to be. It’s two hours earlier in Vegas. We’ll make it just in time.”

Suddenly a loud pounding noise reverberated through the house. It took a minute to realize it was someone knocking on the door—not knocking, hammering insistently.

“Is that the door?” Jill asked.

“Yeah. Maybe someone is stranded in this mess.”

“I wish we could ignore it,” she said, stealing one more kiss.

“Mmmmm, me too.” Luke arose reluctantly. “No worries. By tomorrow, you’ll be sick of me.” He winked.

“Not a chance.” Jill giggled. She was ready to lose herself in Luke, to give herself to him wholly. It was going to be a honeymoon to remember.

Then the knock on the door changed into a whimsical tune. Luke froze. Over and over the knock echoed through the house. He turned and looked at her, his eyes wide.

“Shave and a Haircut,” he whispered.

Jill felt certain she saw Luke pale in the dim light. There could be no doubt as to who was at the door.

“It’s Troy?” Jill breathed. The singsong knock vibrated through the house like a harbinger of death.

“Yeah.”

“What should we do?” She shivered, chills wandering up and down her spine. Between the storm and lack of electricity, Troy’s arrival felt . . . ominous.

“We have to face him sometime.”

Everything was so perfect between her and Luke right now. Jill didn’t want to ruin the moment. But she couldn’t run off and marry Luke without speaking with Troy first.

It was the right thing to do.

Jill nodded at him, encouraging him to answer the door. It was the day of reckoning. They both needed to face Troy.

Luke threw open the door and a dark figure hovered in the doorway.

“Is she here?” a gruff voice demanded.

It was Troy. They both knew it would be. She recognized his voice immediately. He did not sound happy or friendly or pleased. But then, neither one of them expected him to be thrilled with the turn of events.

“Come on in, Troy,” Luke said politely. “Get out of the rain.”

“I heard you were in town,” Troy hurled as he stepped inside, his hair dripping and plastered to the top of his head. He wore a black raincoat that made him loom in the dim light as if he was much bigger than he actually was. He suddenly seemed a formidable figure, dark and menacing. Jill could feel his anger as if it were a separate entity that had entered the room. His eyes sought her out in the dark confines of the ranch house. Slowly, Jill rose to her feet. Since becoming engaged to Troy a week ago, she’d only seen him twice. Once for a quick lunch before she had to go to work and once when she dropped off a pot of soup at his home when he wasn’t feeling well. Other than that, they really hadn’t communicated much. It was hardly an engagement to be proud of.

“I knew you’d be here,” he spat heatedly. “It didn’t take me long to figure it out.”

Actually she was surprised he’d noticed she was gone at all.

His eyes took in the setting. The roaring fire, the candles, the mugs of cocoa, the comfy clothes, the throw blanket, the wet hair. It bespoke intimacy. And they’d been doing exactly what he suspected they’d been doing. Well, obviously not as much as he suspected.

“What are you doing here, Jill?” His tone could only be described as accusing.

A little wave of guilt washed over her. Technically, she was engaged to Troy and she’d just agreed to marry Luke. Not exactly her finest moment. She owed him an explanation, even though she’d been very honest with him from the get-go.

“What the hell is this?” he said irately.

“Be careful, Troy,” Luke warned, taking a step toward her, standing between them as if he worried he might need to protect her.

Jill felt a slight chill of fear wander up and down her spine. Troy was steaming mad.

“This is between Jill and me, Luke. She is
my
fiancée. Move out of the way,” he hissed through clenched teeth.

“I think this is between me and you,” Luke corrected.

Troy ignored Luke. “Jill,” he said. “C’mon, I’ll take you home.”

Jill took a few steps forward, placing her hand in Luke’s. Troy’s eyes followed the action and he went very still. No one said a word for several tension-filled moments.

Jill thought he was about to verbally attack her. But he didn’t. He turned his wrath on Luke.