Give Me Something (19 page)

“
Now, that's the way to say 'hello' to your boyfriend,” Tucker teased.  He pulled out the barstool beside us and motioned for me to sit.  “So what's going on?  Why'd you have to jet up here?”

I took a hesitant seat, knowing that if I was going to start telling the truth I needed to start now.  “Why don't you order a drink first?” I held up my hand a signal the bartender.  As he was walking toward us, I downed my first drink.  “I'll have another, and can you bring him a beer?”

“You think I'm going to need a drink for this conversation?” Tucker asked with a concerned look.

“
You might,” I offered with a sympathetic smile.

He took the open bottle from the bartender and laid a twenty down.  “Thanks.”  He brought the bottle to his lips, took a drink and smiled.  “Okay, I think I'm ready.”

“Okay,” I let out in a heavy breath.  “Before I start, I need you to know that whatever you think about me, when this is all said and done, I really,
really
,” I emphasized, “care about you.”

He placed his hand on top of mine and squeezed, “You're making me really nervous.  Are you breaking up with me?”

“No!” I ardently shook my head.  “Not at all.  In fact, that is the last thing I want to do.”

“
Good.”  He pulled my hand to his mouth and lightly pressed his lips to it.  “Go on.”

“
I came to Chicago to pay off a debt for Nick.”

“
Okay. That's not so bad.  What did the dumb ass do?” He laughed.

“
Well there's a lot more to the story.”  I started from the beginning.  I told him everything.  I explained how Nick and I actually met, what exactly we did to earn a living, how I was attending college, and, more importantly, how I'd come to be his girlfriend in the first place.  I told him that I'd started this whole escapade with the goal of taking as much money from his as I could get, but then started to have real feelings for him. I wondered if I should tell him about the whole brother fiasco as well, but decided to take this one step at a time.  I had to make sure things were right between us, first.

“
You have no idea how sorry I am.  If I could take it all back, I would.  I'm not the same girl you started dating two months ago.  I swear.” I needed him to see how much he meant to me.  “I'm in love with you, Tucker.  I need you to believe me when I tell you that you make me want to be a better person.”

His expression never wavered from calm and collected as he intently listened to each of the words coming out of my mouth.  I tried to read his face, but came up with nothing.  I couldn't tell if he was pissed, sad, or anything in between.  When I'd finished my story, I took in a deep breath and looked around the crowded bar.  I watched as he lifted the bottle to his lips and finished off the contents.

“Please say something,” I pleaded.

“
Can we go up to your room?” He stood from the bar stool and started to walk toward the exit.  I sat for a moment, praying that he wasn't asking me to go upstairs to break up with me, but I knew how thoughtful he could be. He was probably just moving our conversation away from the crowd of people so he could dump my ass in private.  I couldn't blame him after spewing the truth to him and hearing all of the manipulative, deceitful things I'd done I wouldn't want to be with me either.  I didn't even want to be myself right now.  How had I become such a horrible person?   I'd let idea of becoming wealthy and well dressed take over my life, and even though I'd mentally justified taking from all of those other men, I hadn't earned it in the right way.  “Are you coming?” Tucker asked, looking over his shoulder. 

I slipped out of my seat and reluctantly followed him to the elevator.  The ride to the fourteenth floor was silent.  Tucker stood at least a foot behind me the entire ride, not saying a word.  I heard him release a heavy sigh as the elevator came to a stop and the doors opened.  When we were finally in my room alone, I couldn't take the silence anymore.

“Would you at least just say something?  Yell at me.  Tell me you hate me.  Anything.”  I stood near the edge of the bed wanting nothing more than to hide under the covers and wait for this all to be over. 

Tucker leaned against the small desk in the corner of the room. His lips pursed into a straight line as he rubbed his hand across his forehead, brushing aside the dark hair I wanted nothing more than to run my fingers through.  I knew that I would never have the chance again.

“I knew,” he said in a barely audible tone.

“
Huh?” I couldn't have heard him right.

“
I take that back.  I knew
part
of it
,” he corrected and crossed his arms over his chest.

“
Which part exactly?”

“
I knew that you were only dating me because Nick asked you to.  I knew that he was orchestrating this whole thing,” he said as he wagged his finger back and forth between us. 

“
Then why did you let it
this
thing
go on?”

“
First...” he began and walked toward me, placing his hands on my shoulders, directing me to sit down on the edge of the bed across from him.  “Remember what you said about your feelings being real?  Well, mine are real for you, too.”

I felt a huge rush of relief.

“I'm serious.” 

“
Okay,” I agreed with a little reserve, knowing that I probably wasn't going to like what was coming next.

“
I knew that Nick wanted us to start seeing each other,” he continued.  “I've had him figured out for a while.  I knew it wasn't a coincidence that he wanted to be my roommate.  When he showed up at school last year, I mentioned him to my dad.  He said that he recognized his name.  We did a little research on him and found out a lot of things that I wish I didn't know.  About Nick.  About you.  My dad hired a detective to look into Nick when he started acting like my best friend.  My dad was always careful about who to trust.  People are always trying to get something for free, especially when you have money.”

My shoulders slumped.  I was one of those people. “I still don't understand.” I stated with a confused look.  “If you had all of this information, then why did you let Nick move in with you?  Why didn't you call him on it?”

He shook his head.  “The truth is, I thought he was harmless.  I figured that it was better to have him around to keep an eye on him.”

“
So, you know he thinks he's your brother then?”

“
He's not,” he said very reassuringly.  “I know what he thinks, but my dad said he never cheated on my mom.  I'm sure that you know Nick's mom doesn't have a stellar reputation when it comes to men.”

“
Okay, so you knew about Nick.  What did you know about me?”

“
Not too much.  I knew the basics.  Your family history.  A little bit about the trouble you got into as a kid.”  So that's how he knew about my brother.  I hadn't mentioned him before.  “And, I knew that you were close with Nick.  Which is why...” he hesitated, closing his eyes.  “Which is why I agreed to date you in the first place.”

“
What do you mean?”

“
I knew that Nick was planning something.  Photographs and bank receipts kept disappearing from my room. I kept hearing from the guys that Nick was asking personal questions about me.  Then you suddenly showed up at that party.  I decided I was going beat Nick to the punch.  I couldn't let him get the upper hand on me.”

I threw my hands up.  “So what was your plan?  To use me against him?”

He dropped his head.  “I was fairly certain that you two were a couple.” 

“
We were
never
a couple,” I interjected.  We were never going to be a couple, either.  I had accepted that fact now.

Tucker's lips curled up a little – as if he was secretly happy that I'd confirmed that notion.  He continued. “I figured I'd get you to fall for me and forget about him.  I knew he was planning on taking something from me and you were the only thing he had.  I wanted to take you from him.”

“Then what?  Dump me?  Break my heart?”  I felt betrayed.  I understood Tucker's motivation.  I wasn't perfect, but the sad thing is I thought he was.  I started to question everything that had happened between us.  Was any of it real?  Had I made the wrong choice?

“
That's how it was supposed to go down, Lila.  But it didn't happen that way.  It took me about two seconds to see that you weren't like him.  I gave up on the plan pretty quickly.  As soon as I knew how sweet and funny and... You're it for me, Lila.”

“
I don't know what to say,” I admitted and covered my face with my hands briefly before crossing them across my chest.  I stood up and walked across the room.  I turned back to Tucker. “I can't believe you lied to me.”

“
That's kind of the pot calling the kettle black,” he said flatly.

“
How do I know that you still aren't trying to use me against Nick?  I just...” I shook my head, “I don't know if I can trust you.”

“
You?!  What about me?  You were the one trying to steal money from me this whole time!” He stood up.

“
That's not fair,” I argued.  “I came clean to you.  Were you ever going to tell me the truth?”

“
I was hoping I wouldn't have to,” he said walking over to me.  He placed his hands on my shoulder.  “I'm telling you the truth.  I want to be with you.  I don't care about any of that other shit.”

I wanted to believe him.  I wanted to fall into his arms and forget everything that we'd talked about tonight.  I wanted to carry on as if none of it existed, but I couldn't.  I'd trusted Nick and he'd burned me.  And, I wasn't innocent in this whole thing.  Would Tucker ever really be able to trust me either?  The lies came between me and Nick, so who's to say that they wouldn't come between me and Tucker, too?

“I don't know what to do,” I confessed, staring into his eyes.  He didn't appear to be hiding anything.  Maybe he was telling me the truth.  Just before I could let my mind go to possibility of being with him I saw the clock on the nightstand.  8:33 p.m.   “Shit!”  I pulled myself from Tucker's grasp and grabbed my bag.  “I gotta go.”

“
Wait,”  Tucker called out.  “Where are you going?”

“
I've got to take care of this thing with Nick,” I said, opening the door. 

“
Don't go,” he pleaded.  “Stay here so we can figure this thing out.”

I really wanted to.  I wanted to figure out exactly where we stood, to see if we could ever really trust each other, but I my newly acquired conscience wanted to take care of Nick so that I could move forward without him.  “I can't.” I immediately regretted leaving him on the other side of the door as it closed behind me.

Chapter 14

I spent the entire cab ride to the club wondering if Tucker would be waiting for me at the hotel when I got back.  Did I even want him to be?  That was a stupid question.  Of course I did.  Even though I knew it was going to be hard for us to trust each other, I couldn't imagine not at least trying to make it work.  Just as the cab was pulling to a stop, I grabbed my cell phone and typed out a quick message:

Please don't leave.  I'll be back soon.

I hit send, handed the cabby a twenty and told him to wait for me. “I'll be ten minutes, tops.”  He nodded that he'd wait as I shut the door and headed into the club.

The sweet smell of fine tobacco and brandy permeated the air as I walked through the door.  I was greeted by the hostess.  She was a pretty girl – dark hair, dark eyes, and latte colored skin. She greeted me warmly. “Can I help you?”

“
Yes,” I replied, looking at her name tag.  “Nadine, I'm looking for Marco Belletti.”  I watched her eyes flicker to the seating chart on the podium in front of her.  I knew what she was doing.  Everybody in this town knew who Marco Belletti was.  If he was here, she would have known.  She was planning on telling me that he wasn't there.  My guess – he was.  He probably came in and asked not to be disturbed.  Now, Little Miss Hostess was trying to play it off and was going to say, “I'm sorry.  Mr. Belletti isn't here tonight.”  Before she could, I stepped toward her and she quickly looked up.  “I know he's here.  Can you just tell him that Lila Rae is here to see him.”  She looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language.

“
I guess,” she mumbled and stepped away from the podium to head into the dimly lit club.  Little alcoves, filled with leather club chairs and mahogany tables were privately tucked away for the customers to enjoy drinks and cigars without the interference of unwanted guests.  I hoped Marco remembered me.  I'd only met him a handful of times, but I knew he was the kind of guy who never forgot a pretty face.  I just hoped mine was pretty enough.

While I waited, I pulled my cell phone out, hoping for a text from Tucker.  I slid my finger across the screen. Nothing.  I'd lost him.
I wanted to call him or at least send another text to reiterate the fact that I really wanted him to wait for me, but I saw Nadine coming back toward me through the haze of cigar smoke.