Hell Inc. (8 page)

I was
desperate to move onto the next area in search of Queen Bee but the
sphinx had caught my attention, and I decided to stick around for a
bit. It wasn't often that supernatural creatures were anything but a
pain in my ass. I checked over my shoulder though, trying to see if
Levie had found his way in yet. I didn't see him, but the museum was
huge; he could've been anywhere. I hoped he didn't find me for
awhile. After my weird behavior, I didn't feel like seeing him.

The group
of old people taking the audio tour walked away from the exhibit,
leaving the sphinx and I alone in the room. “When the Pharaoh
gives his son a chariot and invites him to see the world, what should
the people fear most?” Another riddle. I wondered if it ever
spoke in anything but.

After
awhile, the sphinx finally stood up and wandered down the row of
papyrus towards the room with the pottery. I followed it over to one
particularly large pot with a 'DO NOT TOUCH – FRAGILE' sign
posted on the base of the glass case it was in. There were red
velvet ropes all around it and special lighting inside to make the
designs on the rim stand out. The sphinx sat down again and cocked
its head back and forth. “Winter comes and winter goes, but
where is it that the sun always shines and spring is everlasting?”

“I'm
not sure,” I joked. “But tell me where it is so I can
avoid it. I like the rain.” Apparently, the sphinx was not
used to people talking back, and I startled it so much that it flung
its body away from me and right into the stand holding the pot. Now,
I'm sure that the stand the pot was in was very securely attached to
the ground. So much so that no human being falling into it could
knock it over. However, a sphinx is not a human being, it is a
sphinx, and as such, it has the body of a lion. It may have been a
small lion but a small lion is not so very small and as its body hit,
the screws wrenched out of the ground, setting the stand to toppling
over.

“Oh
shit,” was all I managed to get out before the glass and the
pot broke in a horrendous shattering crash on the marble floor. The
sphinx scurried backwards, staring at me and then at the pot with a
horrified expression of dismay.

“What
on this earth can take the shifting sands of time and build a pyramid
that reaches the sky?” it all but shouted at me.

All at
once, I heard a chorus of footsteps coming towards the room.

I whirled
around to find a group of museum staff staring at me and then at the
mess on the floor with sheer panic obvious in every one of their
eyes. Standing in the front, his eyes glimmering like the Caribbean
Sea, was Queen Bee. He opened his mouth to speak to me (for the
first time ever) when one of the older men that was standing behind
him started shouting.

“You
idiot!” he screamed at the top of his lungs. “Do you
have any idea how important that pot was to the collection?” Of
course I didn't, but I could guess. It was probably hundreds of
thousands of dollars important, if not more. What was I going to do?
Say that it was the sphinx that did it? Like they'd believe me.

I turned
my attention back to Queen Bee. In my many fantasies, I had never
once thought this was how our first meeting would go. But maybe this
was a blessing in disguise. He had a nice face, soft and friendly
looking underneath the shocked and angry expression he was now
wearing. However, his irritation seemed to be directed more at the
shouting man than at me. I decided that I'd have the best chance
convincing him that it wasn't my fault.

“Look,”
I said. “I was just standing here, and it fell over. Really,
there must have been a small earthquake or something, check your
security cameras if you don't believe me.” Queen Bee cocked
his head to the side and studied me for a moment before speaking, the
anger draining from his face.

“It
was bolted to the floor rather securely,” he said sadly, and I
felt my blood pressure rising. How was I ever going to get out of
this? “There's really no way she could have knocked it over,
even if she tried.” My pulse slowed, just a bit, and I almost
breathed a sigh of relief but decided to hold it in, just in case
they got the wrong idea. I wrung my hands together nervously in
front of me as one of the security officers stepped forward.

“I
can go check the cameras, Terrence.” Terrence. His name was
Terrence. And he was in charge. Lucky me. Terrence nodded, and the
security guard took off at a jog while I just stood there, unsure of
what to do. The older man, the one who'd shouted, stepped forward
and pointed an accusing finger at me.

“You're
going to get it,” he said, menacingly. “You're not
getting out of this. We are going to sue you, put you in jail.”
He was so angry that spittle was flying out of his mouth as he
spoke. It was rather disgusting. The sphinx, perhaps sorry for
causing so much trouble, trotted up to me and sat by my side.

“What
does a fool who doesn't see the worth of others see in himself?”

“You
said it,” I whispered back, and the sphinx nodded as if I had
said something important. Terrence looked at me strangely and then
flicked an angry glance at the man. Another man and a woman dressed
similarly in khaki suits stepped forward and grasped the man by the
shoulders.

“I
don't care if there is nothing to prove it on the cameras,” he
snapped. “I'm going to see you pay for this.” The
hatred in his eyes was so intense that it made me take a step
backwards. Who was he to hate me so much, having never even met me?

“That's
enough,” Terrence said calmly, and the man pursed his lips and
nodded, his head hanging as if he were a child scolded by his father.
It was a strange sight considering their ages: Terrence was at least
three decades younger than him.

“Ask
the cobra who leaves his hole in the heat of the day, what does life
have in store for you?” riddled the sphinx. I ignored it that
time and tried to thank Terrence. I was cut off before I could utter
a single word.

“No,”
the woman in the khaki suit said rudely. “You can wait for
your lawyer to get here. I don't even want to hear you speak.”

“Cynthia,”
Terrence said firmly, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Please,
calm down. I'm sure this was all one, big accident.” Cynthia
straightened her jacket and gave Terrence a come-and-get-me sort of
look then glared at me like I was trying to steal her mate. I just
wished she would hiss.

“You're
going to wish you never set foot in here today. Trust me.” The
look that I was receiving from the collective group was less than
friendly. The only person there who looked like he didn't want to
eat me was Terrence. And the sphinx, of course.

Where was
Levie when I needed him? Maybe he could've helped me out. If we'd
been together, he could've vouched for me. I sighed.

“Have
I seen you here before?” Terrence asked, head cocked slightly
to one side. “You seem kind of familiar.” I choked up,
suddenly afraid that he had realized I'd been stalking him. I
mumbled under my breath and tried to come up with something to say.
Thankfully, I was saved the embarrassment as the security guard that
went to check the cameras came back, face red and puffy from running.
Terrence looked at him hopefully, as if he held all of the solutions
that he needed. The man shook his head.

“There
was a lag in the tape. One minute the pot was up, and the next, it
was already broken.” I felt my breath catch in my throat.
Now
what?
Terrence rubbed his chin thoughtfully. Cynthia gave me a
glare worthy of a crocodile, and I just stood there, feeling
underdressed in the room full of suits.

“How
does one who does not understand his fellows begin to recognize the
world for what it is?” the sphinx asked. I buried my face in
my hands.

“I
don't know,” I sighed, not caring that they had no idea who I
was talking to. “I just wish that these people could
understand what I have to go through everyday.” Bang. That was
it. The air shifted around me and I knew I'd done it again.

People in
the museum began to scream. I looked up and saw them pointing at the
sphinx.

“What
the hell is that?” one woman screeched, grabbing her
toddler and yanking him against her chest. Cynthia grabbed onto
Terrence's arm for dear life, and the pair of them exchanged a
horrified glance. The sphinx and I did the same. Uh-oh. I looked
up at the group.

“You
can see it now, too?” I asked. Everyone looked at me like I
was crazy. Terrence stared at me and the sphinx with the intense
fascination that only a scholar can give. I liked him even more for
that. Too bad I was never going to see him again. Or the museum. I
would miss it. “Sorry,” I said, suddenly noticing Levie
staring at me with an angry expression from the doorway of the
exhibit. “But I've got to go.”

I took off
running, darting around the shocked security guards and heading for
the exit. No one even tried to stop me, so intent were they on the
sphinx. I gave Levie a look that I hoped he would catch and bolted
past him, brushing against one half-outstretched, leathery wing on my
way outside. I didn't stop until I was a couple of blocks away. I
would have kept going but let's face it, I was a bit out of shape.
Only adrenaline had allowed me to get so far.

“Fucking
Little Debbie,” I growled, blaming the Queen of Snacks for my
laziness. I checked my watch. It was a quarter past two, almost
time for lunch with my apparently reformed mother. I leaned down and
rested my hands on my knees. I didn't even want to go anymore. I
felt physically ill. Two wishes gone. Two. I had quit my job not
to mention
sold my soul,
and now I had only one freaking wish.
“What the hell did I just do?” I asked myself aloud. I
stood up and waited until my head stopped spinning before I began
walking in the direction of the restaurant. I needed alcohol, and I
needed it now.

As I
walked, I tried to clear my mind and figure out exactly what had been
going on in there. I didn't have long to myself because before I
knew it, Levie was beside me.

“Great,”
I said. “Just great. You want to kill me now or after you go
to the rack or the pits or whatever?” I shook my head and
walked faster. This time Levie kept pace with me.

“That
will not happen,” he said confidently as we both stepped over
the tail of a naga who happened to be asking directions from a
vampire. Bizarre as that was, I didn't have the emotional capacity
to appreciate it.

“Why
not?” I tripped over a crack in the sidewalk, and Levie caught
my elbow, hauling me up and pulling me along without breaking stride.

“Because
you broke no rules,” he said. I tried to stop walking and
stare at him, but he dragged me along.

“No?”
I asked suspiciously.

“That
was a perfectly legitimate wish. Although I would have preferred it
if you had consulted me first about your phrasing. I see no harm
done.” All of a sudden he was Mr. Nice, Reassuring Demon Guy?
Bullshit. I didn't believe it for a second.

“You
were glaring at me,” I said, yanking my arm from his grip.
“From the doorway to the exhibit. I saw you.” Levie's
expression changed to something I couldn't quite read and then
reverted back to its default arrogance.

“That's
none of your concern; just rest assured that all is well.” I
snorted but kept walking. “I can no longer leave you alone for
long, though. I admit, I am afraid you will condemn us both with
your idiocy.” Suddenly, or so it seemed, the restaurant was
right in front of us. I stopped outside the door and turned to
Levie.

“What
kind of idiot makes the same mistake twice?” I sounded whiny.
Yuck. But I felt like I was on the verge of having a full blown
panic attack. Levie's face softened a bit, and he placed a hand on
my shoulder.

“You
are merely impulsive and have trouble controlling the words that
continuously stream from your mouth.” I gawked at him and
flung his hand off.

“Was
that supposed to make me feel better?” I practically shrieked.
Levie frowned and I waved him away. “You know what, forget it.
Just forget it. But I'm canceling AT&T and getting that damn
cell phone coverage.” I yanked open the door to the little
cafe and waited for the hostess to seat us at one of the round
tables. Levie came in and stood silently beside me while I focused
my gaze on the orange terra-cotta tiles on the floor.

“What
are you going to do, sit with me and my reformed, ex-drug addict
mother?” I snapped at him. Levie, apparently nonplussed,
looked around and selected a table, seating himself comfortably in
one of the wooden chairs. “It says 'Please wait to be
seated,'” I griped at him, just to make myself feel better.

“I
will eat my own meal here and leave with you when you are finished,”
he said, unwrapping a cloth napkin from around some silverware and
tucking it in his lap. I stood there for a second and then walked
over to another table and sat down with my back to him.
You're
being an asshole again,
I told myself and tried to get my
breathing under control. I counted to ten
then got up and walked back over to Levie's table and sat down again.
He smiled at me (possibly for the first time ever) as the waitress
approached us with a pair of menus.

Before she
even had a chance to speak, I blurted out, “I know it's early,
but can I get a Slippery Nipple, please?” The woman didn't even
look at me; she was staring at Levie and blushing.
He
was
staring at
me
and blushing. I was kind of confused. “Um,”
I interjected, trying not to drum my nails on the tabletop. “Can
I get that
soon
?” I wasn't trying to be rude, but I
really, really needed that drink. The waitress blinked her eyes
several times like she was coming out of a coma and nodded.
He
isn't that hot
, I wanted to shout at her. Levie then ordered a
glass of water, a glass of
clean
water with three ice cubes.
I wanted to shake him.