Her Sudden Groom (19 page)

She grinned at him. “You sly devil, you.”

He did a partial bow. “See anything up there yet?”

“
Not really,” she said. “I think it needs to get a little darker first.”

“
You’re likely right. Shall we go outside and watch the sky from the ground?” He reached up to help her down the ladder. Alex blew out the candles, grabbed two blankets he’d left out there earlier, then followed her out the door.

“
Where’s your mother,” Caroline asked as soon as they were out of the gazebo.

He stopped walking and took her hand in his, then gently twisted her around to face him. “She’s not coming. It’s just the two of us tonight.”

“
Perhaps I should go home,” she said, trying to tug her hand from his.

“
No. Caro, nothing is going to happen except us stargazing together.”

“
I know,” she admitted. “I know I can trust you. But if someone should see, it will cause scandal, and I cannot repay Marcus that way. Nor can I do that to Olivia. As awful as she is, I cannot embarrass her that way.”

“
What of you, Caro?” he asked, squeezing her hand. “Who is to think of you and what you want?”

She shook her head. “That doesn’t matter. Marcus has suffered greatly since his accident. I cannot risk bringing a scandal to him. Nor Olivia’s wrath.”

“
That won’t be a problem,” he assured her. “There will be no scandal. Everyone from the lowest scullery maid to the baron himself is tucked up nice and warm in their bed. Nobody knows you’re here, and nobody is going to know. Now, stop worrying and get ready to enjoy the lunar eclipse.”

“
All right,” she said with a swallow.

He led her to a clear patch of the lawn with just enough slope for them to be able to look at the moon without having to crane their necks.

“
Here, help me spread this,” he said, handing her one side of the folded blanket.

When they’d finished, Caroline went over to the folded blanket he’d set off to the side and picked it up. “Is this one for me?”

“
No.” He took the blanket from her loose grasp and tossed it to the ground. “It’s for us. We’ll use it to cover up with when we get cold tonight. Now, lie down with me.”

Chapter 11

Caroline stared down at Alex as he stretched out like a cat on the blanket. He patted the spot beside him. His smile couldn’t be described as anything but wolfish. He may have said nothing was going to happen between them tonight, but she was not so sure. Something about Alex Banks sent a shiver down her spine and made her want to act in a most inappropriate manner.

She had no idea what spurred these reactions in her. She’d like to blame it on all her years of being overprotected. But that was false and she knew it. She could try to blame it on the fact she had compassion for Alex since Olivia was planning to cuckold him. That wasn’t true, either. No, her responses to him were her own sheer wantonness. And sitting down next to him right now just might push her over the edge. Too bad he was too much of a gentleman to ever act dishonorably, she thought cheekily, then chastised herself for such a wicked, wicked thought.

“
I’m waiting, Caro,” he said, extending a hand up to her.

Against her better judgment, she put her hand in his open palm and let him pull her to the ground next to him. “Wait no more,” she said with a smile.

“
Are you cold?” He chafed her chilled hand between his two larger ones.

“
A little,” she admitted with a swallow.

He let go of her hand and grabbed the extra blanket. He shook it out and draped it over the front of her before going up on his knees and using them to walk behind her. He sat back down and placed one leg on either side of her, pulling her body back to rest flush against his.

She wiggled her shoulders a bit to get more settled against him, slightly surprised at the firmness of his chest. She didn’t think an academic would have any muscles. Hmm, she was discovering there was more to Arid Alex at every turn.

“
Do you like constellations?” His voice was smooth as butter.

“
Of course. What kind of astronomer would I be if I didn’t?”

He chuckled and brought one hand up to play with the loose curls on the right side of her head. “What’s your favorite?”

“
The Big Dipper,” she said automatically.

“
Good choice. Easy to find. And not easy to confuse.” Alex twisted her hair around his finger.

“
My mother loved the Little Dipper best,” she said for no other reason than just to talk. “As a little girl who wanted to be just like her mother, I would always tell her my favorite was the Big Dipper. Ironic how things never change.” She sighed. “The only difference is, back then I said it to be like my mother, and now, it truly is my favorite.” Looking at the Big and Little Dippers had always made her feel closer to her mother in a way nothing else did. She started. She usually felt a pain—sometimes sharp, sometimes faint—in her chest when she thought of her mother. But for some reason, the pain wasn’t there just now.

“
Do you miss her a great deal?” Alex asked somberly, his fingers frozen.

She closed her eyes. His question was about to be his own reality. He was about to lose someone he was close to and her answer meant a lot to him. She couldn’t lie. “Yes, I do. But, it was a long time ago now, and I’ve found others to love and care for in her stead. It’s not the same, of course. But it’s better to love others than to sit miserable without loving or being loved in return.”

“
You love Marcus and Miss Green, don’t you?”

And you.
She bit her tongue to keep that from slipping out. But not saying it aloud didn’t make it untrue. Somewhere in the last few days, she’d begun to fall in love with the one gentleman she could never have. She’d never dreamt of marriage and children as a child; she’d not been allowed. Her aunt had informed her frequently she would not get to marry. But now that she was almost of an age to marry without consent if she so wished, she suddenly wished to and couldn’t. She swallowed a lump of raw emotion that had formed in her throat. “And Olivia,” she croaked.

“
You cannot be serious.”

“
I am. She’s my cousin, after all. To quote Marcus, ‘I may not like her most—nay, all—the time, but I do love her.’”

Chuckling, Alex squeezed her a little tighter. “Loyal to a fault, aren’t you?”

“
When you have only a handful of people to love and accept love from, you can’t be too particular,” she jested with a smile.

“
I guess not. One day, you’ll have more people to love and accept love from, Caro. I promise it.”

She nodded, not sure what to say. “What’s yours?” she asked, her voice cracking.

“
Pardon?”

“
Your favorite constellation.”

“
Lynx.”

“
Lynx?”

“
It’s a smaller, dimmer constellation. It’s said you have to have catlike vision to see it. It’s between Ursa Major and Auriga.”

“
I know what it is and where it is, I’m just surprised
you
do,” she teased.

He rested his chin on the crown of her head and wrapped his arms around her. “You teasing minx. I just got that. It took me a second, but I got that.”

She laughed. “I’m glad. I wasn’t sure if you’d get my jest or if you’d shrug and tell me you can see it just fine with your telescope.”

“
I almost did,” he admitted with a chuckle. “If it weren’t for your shaking shoulders and the change in your tone, I wouldn’t have realized you were jesting.”

“
Sorry, Alex.” She covered his hands with hers. “I know you’re a serious sort. I’ll try not to tease you in the future.”

“
It’s all right,” he assured her. “You can tease me if you wish. I rather like it. ”

She nodded, trying to force herself to think about their conversation and not wonder how it would feel if Alex moved his big hands a few inches higher. “I’m glad you like it,” she said with calm she didn’t feel.

“
Is something wrong?”

Yes, I can’t stop thinking about how you’re too much of a gentleman, and I’ll never know what it’s like to have a man’s hands on me.
“No. Why?”

“
You keep shifting around. I just wondered.”

“
Oh, sorry. I was just trying to get more comfortable.”

His hands loosened their hold on her, but she held them hands in place. “Do what you need to do to get comfortable,” he murmured in her ear.

She made a show of kicking her feet out in front of her and twisting her body around. When she finished, his hands rested just beneath her breasts.

“
Better now?” he asked.

Nodding, she whispered, “Much.”

“
Good. I’m glad you found a position that makes us both more comfortable.” He moved both his thumbs up to caress the bottoms her breasts.

“
Alex,” she squeaked, surprised by his boldness.

“
Hmm?” His thumbs made a second sweep of her breasts and came to settle on the outer sides of them, gently pushing into her swollen flesh.

Her fingers pressed into his and she bit her lip so as not to sigh as his thumbs and forefingers kneaded her breasts.

His probing fingers made her breasts swell to the point of straining against her bodice while her nipples hardened and jutted out like twin points beneath the fabric. “Do you like this, Caro?”

She didn’t answer. She couldn’t answer. She did enjoy it. Immensely. And that was the problem. She was enjoying her cousin’s intended. Suddenly, Caroline felt like she was fifteen again and Olivia had just dumped a giant pot full of ice chips, snow, and cold water on her head while she read a book by the fire. Or in other words, cold reality was washing over her. “Alex, please stop.” She grabbed his hands to pull them off.

His fingers immediately left her breasts. “I’m sorry,” he said raggedly. He cleared his throat. “Excuse my behavior. I thought... Never mind what I thought, I was wrong. It won’t happen again.”

“
It’s all right, Alex. You didn’t misinterpret anything.” Shame washed over her. “I did.”

He scoffed. “I doubt that. As Marcus so nicely reminded me last week, I am very obtuse. I know that. I always have. I have difficulty reading people’s faces and knowing what their tone or actions really mean.” He snorted. “Isn’t it ironic? I can list off nearly every scientific fact or mathematical formula discovered, but I struggle to know what people are really saying if they don’t just say it.”

She squeezed his hands affectionately. “I promise this wasn’t your fault. It was mine.” She felt like the lightskirt Olivia had always claimed she would grow up to be if not for Uncle Joseph. “Wait. You realized I was jesting earlier.”

“
I know,” he said with a sigh, then interlaced his fingers with hers. “As I said before, you were shaking with laughter, and your tone changed. It’s difficult to explain. I don’t always make sense of everything right away, which is why it took me a minute to put it together. But when I remembered that you’d made a comment yesterday that my mother laughed at, your tone was similar to the one you’d just used and your shoulders shook. That’s why I knew to think about your words. After a few seconds, I realized you were just having fun.” He dropped a kiss on the top of her head. “It really doesn’t matter. The more time we’re together, the better I’ll get about it. Just give me time.”

“
It’s all right, Alex,” she murmured, leaning her head back against his chest. “We all struggle with something.”

“
What do you struggle with?” His voice as soft as velvet.