Hidden Destiny (Redwood Pack) (8 page)

“When I get angry or feel any real emotion, I can’t control it sometimes. It’s not that I want to go out and kill someone, I’m not that off-kilter, but it’s that I need to so…something. Something that is all wolf and not man. Something like letting myself go and not care about human rules and feelings. My wolf needs an outlet, and ripping someone’s head off isn’t the best course of action.”

“I wouldn’t think so,” she whispered.

He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “No, honey. I needed to leave and run out the adrenaline in my system.”

“So you ran it off, rather than hurting me?” She swallowed, her throat dry.

He set his jaw. “No. I would
never
hurt you, Lexi. And there’s another way I can let out the…extra energy.” He grinned then, and she swallowed hard.

She blushed, knowing
exactly
what he meant.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh. So I had to leave, but I shouldn’t have left. Pretty fucked up.”

“Fucked up doesn’t begin to cover this situation, North. What are we going to do?” Being frank had always helped her keep the craziness at bay. It had to help here.

“My wolf feels you, Lexi. You know I do too. Fate fucked up before, but it isn’t fucking up now. You’re my mate.”

Her heart shuddered at those words, and a tear slid down her cheek. She shook her head.

“No, North. You know that can’t happen.”

He cupped her face and forced his gaze to hers. She melted into the jade green of his eyes, needing the pull of him, the feel of him. “Yes. It can, and it will. I’ll kill him, Lexi. He deserves to die for countless crimes, but I’d kill him just to have you. I’m selfish. I want you in my life. I know we have so much to learn about each other, but I’m not going to wait to have you by my side. We’ll learn each other and find a way to have our own mating…even without the bond for now.”

“North…” What he was saying? God, it would kill him….would kill them both.

North closed his eyes then opened them slowly, an odd pain running through them that made her want to reach out and soothe, protect. He licked his lips and took a breath. “My wolf? He wants more. He…”

“He's darker than you let others know,” she finished for him.

She watched him swallow hard, his eyes glowing gold. “He won’t hurt you. In fact, he’s never hurt another person that didn’t deserve it…but he’s stronger than the others in some ways. He’s not Alpha, but I can shift faster than my father if I try and I can fight better than most. Whatever happens from here on, we’ll figure it out. I want you with or without the bond. Do you want me?”

She nodded before she even thought it through fully.

He crushed his mouth to hers, and she was lost.

His tongue tangled with hers, the sweet taste dancing on her tongue. He slid his hands down her sides, cupped her ass, and pulled her closer. His rock-hard erection pressed against her belly, and she gasped into his mouth.

Holy crap, this was really happening.

He backed her against the wall, his mouth never leaving hers. She could feel the wolf within him reaching out to her, and she shuddered. It was odd, considering she couldn’t even feel her own wolf, but that rough, darker energy that came from his wolf, beneath the man she cared for enveloped her like a quick lick of temptation. Yes, this man would be her mate—bond or no bond.

Her back against the wall, she arched against him, her nipples two hard points against his chest. He pulled back, letting his hands run down her sides, along her breasts, and down to her hips.

If she could have heard her wolf, she had a feeling it would be growling, nudging along her skin, wanting to touch, to taste, to
know
her mate like Lexi was doing.

“I’m going to taste you, all of you, then I’m going to fuck you hard against the wall, my Lexi.”

She swallowed hard then nodded. That sounded like a great plan to her.

“Then I’m going to bring you to bed and make love to you there,” he growled, his eyes glowing gold with need despite the sweetness of his words.

She nodded, needing, wanting.

He kissed her then, his tongue tracing her lips. She opened for him, wanting it harder, knowing he needed it harder too. He kept at the leisurely pace though, as if he didn’t have a care in the world, as if he was going slowly for her rather than fast and hard like they both needed. Maybe he couldn’t tell that she wanted it hard, wanted it hot and fast.

She would just have to make sure he got the picture.

She pressed herself against him, trying to make him go faster, but he moved quickly then, trapping her arms above her head. The action made her breasts press against his chest, and she moaned.

Yes, just like that.

“North, I need you, now.”

“I’m going slow, my Lexi. You need to be cherished. Loved.”

She blinked back the moisture in her eyes. “I’m not fragile, North. I know…” She swallowed hard. “I know why you’re doing this, but he doesn’t matter. He isn’t here. You are. I am. Please don’t let him come between us. It’s you and me, North. Take me like you want to. You know I want it, too.” She arched against him. “Please.”

She knew she was begging, but she didn’t care. She wanted this man, her North, and she knew he wanted her too. Holding himself back wasn’t helping anyone. It was only putting a barrier between them they hadn’t known existed.

“Please,” she whispered.

North swallowed hard, and her gaze followed the long line of his neck before moving to his eyes. They grew darker, and he nodded.

“Done,” he growled.

He kept one hand on her wrists, keeping her pinned, then ripped—
ripped
—her shirt off. She was wearing only a tank to begin with, so it fell easily, but still…

Dear. Lord.

She shivered, aching for this man, this wolf.

She hadn’t been wearing a bra, so her breasts fell heavy, wanting. North licked his lips, and she panted, her chest heaving. He lowered his head and latched onto a nipple, sucking it between his lips and lapping it with his tongue. The sensation shot straight to her pussy, and she rubbed her legs together, needing release.

North growled, the sensation gliding over her skin, causing her inner walls to clench.

“No moving,” he grunted and used his free hand to grip her hip, keeping her in place. He kissed around her breast then the valley between them before moving to her other nipple where he licked, sucked, and laved her. She felt her panties getting damp just from his attention to her breasts, and she squirmed.

“I love your tits, Lex. I’m going to fuck them and your mouth at the same time soon. Oh yes, my cock sliding between these pretty things? A-fucking-mazing.” He moved his hand from her hip and cupped her breast. “You’re beautiful, Lexi. I’m not just saying that. And, yeah, I know beautiful is such a contrived word nowadays, but I don’t care. I love the way you look, the way you move, the way you breathe. Got me?”

She nodded, wanting him inside her.

Now.

“Soon I’m going to put you in something that makes these plump tits of yours even sexier, maybe a corset. Then, I will bend you over while you’re wearing it and fuck you hard. What do you say about that?”

She nodded.

Okay, he was really good with the dirty talk.

Really. Freaking. Good.

Since his hand wasn’t on her hip anymore, she moved so she could press against his cock. He growled and spun her around so her chest was flat along the wall, his cock on her ass.

“What did I say about moving, my Lexi?”

She swallowed hard, needing him like this, hard, demanding. Lexi craved his control, knowing when he took over, she’d feel safe, protected, and cared for. She wanted, no—
needed
—to surrender to him.

“I’m sorry?”

North chuckled, the rough sound washing over her. His hand smacked against her ass, and she let out a squeal.

“You’re not sorry, but it’s okay. I know you want me inside you, and I will be. Soon.” He spanked her again then rubbed the sting. She was wearing jeans, so it didn’t hurt as much as it would have if she’d been completely naked.

Maybe next time…

He spun her around again and let go of her hands to kneel before her. He looked up at her, his eyes filled with need and a grin on his face. She reached down and tangled her fingers in his hair, unable to help herself. He smiled big then undid her jeans. She sucked in a breath as he stripped her pants and panties off slowly, the anticipation heady.

“Spread your legs,” he ordered, and she did so quickly.

He let his hands run along her thighs, and then he was there, his thumb on her clit, his face between her legs. He licked, nibbled, and sucked along her lower lips and clit, her inner walls slick, ready for him.

“North,” she panted. “Please!”

He growled against her clit, the low rumbling shooting straight through her. She came hard, her inner walls tightening on the tip of his tongue. He licked and sucked her as she came down from her high. Finally he stood, and she watched him undress for her in a hungry haze. She wanted more, but she wasn’t sure she could voice it. Her body was too full and yet empty without him.

She licked her lips as her gaze raked over the long, lean lines of his body. He wasn’t as bulky as most of his brothers, but he was muscled and damn sexy. He had a scattering of blond chest hair and that little happy trail below his belly button that went right to his cock.

Oh, sweetness.

He was long, not too thick, and curved slightly so he bobbed against his belly as he bent over her. His hands slid up her sides then one went around her neck, softly but still in control. Her eyes widened, and then she relaxed, knowing what was coming.

“Ready, my Lexi?”

“Always.”

He moved quickly, cupping her ass with his large hands, and she immediately wrapped her legs around his waist. Slowly, oh so slowly, he entered her, their eyes never leaving each other.

He pulled out then let out a breath, slamming back into her. He gripped her tighter and pumped into her, their breath coming in pants. She arched her back, taking him deeper. One hand moved from her ass to flick her clit, and she came again, but this time around his cock. She screamed his name then kissed him before leaning back against the wall as he continued to fuck her.

She swallowed hard, knowing that no matter how precious this was, no matter how hard he gave it, there wouldn’t be a bond. The tears she’d tried to hold back fell down her cheeks, and North leaned over to kiss them away. As he moved back, the tears on his own cheeks just about broke her.

Gods, they wanted their bond.

The deserved it.

But it wasn’t for them.

At least not yet.

He flexed his hips again, this time shouting her name as he came within her. She sucked in a breath, loving the way he felt. Without leaving her, he pulled her closer then walked them to the bedroom.

Before she could blink, she was flat on the bed, and he was over her, still pumping into her, still hard because he was a wolf and could last longer than a human. He cupped her face, and she slid her hands down his back, bringing him closer.

This time when they came, it was together, beautiful yet bittersweet.

Yes, she had her North, and he had his Lexi, but they weren’t mates.

Not fully.

He kissed her hard and then softened it. She melted against him, needing him closer than she’d ever thought possible.

It didn’t matter, she told herself. It didn’t matter there was no bond. As long as she had North, she could make it.

She had to.

North was pretty sure the best way to wake up was wrapped around a woman, and that woman being Lexi just made it all that much better. The warm body currently snuggled into him made his wolf howl, and the man wanted to beg to bury himself even deeper.

“She’s ours. No matter the cost. She’s ours.”

North silently agreed with his wolf, even though the dull ache of not completing the bond stayed with him. He had a feeling that ache would always stay with him.

At least until he killed Corbin.

His hand fisted in the sheet, and a soft growl escaped him. No, he shouldn’t be thinking about that. Not now. Not when the woman he wanted to be with—the woman he
was
with—was so close, so his.

Her light lashes lay against her pale skin, beautiful, restful. Her blonde hair looked mussed—something he knew he was responsible for and liked. He brushed a strand away, careful not to move too fast and wake her up.

He liked her here, sleeping in his arms as if they didn’t have a care in the world. Oh, he knew the overwhelming issues of their war and Pack would come soon, but right now, in this bed, all he wanted to do was pull her close, taste her skin, and then sink his already hard cock into her heat.

His dick twitched at the thought, and a small laugh escaped the woman in his arms.

“You’re faking it,” North whispered then nuzzled her neck, biting down slightly. Again, he ignored the pain that it wasn’t a mate mark, that there might not be a chance for a mate mark ever. He had to take the happiness as it came and ignore the ache for now. “You’ve been awake, haven’t you?”

Lexi turned in his arms and smiled. “I couldn’t help it. You’re so warm, and I love the way your hands move over me.”

He grinned then captured her lips. “They could have roamed over you even more if you hadn’t been feigning sleep, baby.”

His hand brushed over the curve of her belly, stopping over her mound. She arched into him, and he smiled.

“I’m going to like waking up with you in my arms. I might just have to wake you up in the future by filling you up and rocking you awake.”

Her brows rose, and she smiled. “That’d be one hell of a way to wake up, but I’m a light sleeper. Being a mom sort of took care of that for me.”

North froze, a thought slamming into him that should have come to him before.

Wolves could only have children with their mates.

Shit.

If he didn’t kill Corbin—and he
would,
damn it—he’d never watch Lexi grow round with his child. He’d never hold their baby in his arms and watch it grow up. He’d already missed Parker’s first words, first steps, first change…first everything.