How to Handle Your Emotions (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (25 page)
When the Lord gives Gideon the directive, “Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand,”
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He is not giving Gideon a pep talk or a lesson in positive thinking. Rather, He is referring to His own strength operating inside Gideon. This becomes clear with His promise, “I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites together.”
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Nevertheless, Gideon wants proof that both the message and the messenger are truly from God—and indeed, he receives it.
Gideon presents to God an offering of meat and unleavened bread, and the moment the angel touches the offering with His staff, fire flames from the rock, the offering is incinerated, and the angel disappears—vanishes— without a trace! “When Gideon realized that it was the angel of the L
ORD
, he exclaimed, ‘Ah, Sovereign L
ORD
! I have seen the angel of the L
ORD
face to face!’” (Judges 6:22).
Now Gideon realizes his encounter is with
the
angel of the Lord— meaning he saw a manifestation of the Lord God Himself, not merely an angel. Gideon knew this could mean sudden death!
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God had told Moses, “No one may see Me and live” (meaning seeing God in His essential glory).
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“But the L
ORD
said to [Gideon], ‘Peace! Do not be afraid. You are not going to die’”
(J
UDGES
6:23).
Fortunately, the Lord’s assurance prevents Gideon from experiencing profound panic. Yet there are many things in life that can cause us to feel overwhelmed with fright or filled with terror. And we feel the sense of panic expressed in this scripture:
“Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me”
(P
SALM
55:5).
•
Panic attacks
are sudden, brief episodes of intense fear with multiple physical symptoms (such as heart palpitations and dizziness) but without any precipitating external threat.
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•
Panic attacks
are typically unexpected, “out of the blue” experiences. The first time they occur, people are usually involved in normal activities such as shopping or walking outdoors.
Suddenly a barrage of frightening sensations strikes them, lasting just a few seconds to a few minutes.
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•
Panic attacks
can recur at any time. Sufferers know that just the fear of having another attack can trigger one—and so these episodes take on a life of their own.
•
Panic attacks
can be considered fear out of control.
Question:
“Can I do anything to stop a panic attack?”
Answer:
Yes. When you first begin to experience shallow, rapid breathing, recognize these symptoms as the onset of
hyperventilation
. This state reduces the insufficient carbon dioxide in your blood, which in turn produces classic symptoms of a panic attack: lightheadedness, dizziness, tingling of the extremities, palpitations of the heart, feelings of faintness, and respiratory distress. You can consider the onset of rapid breathing to be a warning signal, and these symptoms can be stopped by using the following techniques:
•
Take slow deep, deep breaths and hold the air in your lungs for a number of seconds. Then slowly release the air.
•
Place the open end of a paper bag around your nose and mouth. Breathe normally into the bag, being sure to breathe in the same air being expelled.
•
Place a blanket or sheet totally over your head, which will increase the amount of carbon dioxide being taken into your lungs and will ward off the frightening symptoms produced by too little carbon dioxide in your blood.
When experiencing a panic attack, you may feel as though you will die! But that feeling is not based on fact. The truth is,
you will not die.
Whatever your perceived “threat,” claim this truth as you go to war against your panic attacks. The Lord says,
“Do not be fainthearted or afraid; do not be terrified or give way to panic before them. For the L
ORD
your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory’”
D. What Is a Phobia?(D
EUTERONOMY
20:3-4).
Gideon has a very real and legitimate fear that he will die, and his fear doesn’t go away entirely despite God’s assurances and call on his life. After the spectacular episode involving the offering, God instructs Gideon to tear down his father’s altar to Baal and cut down his Asherah pole—items of pagan worship—and build an altar to Him.
Gideon obeys, but only under the cover of night because “he was afraid of his family and the men of the town” (Judges 6:27). Oddly enough, God calls this man to defeat an entire army—of well over 100,000—yet this same man is afraid of his own family.
And while some people, such as Gideon, experience profound fear in response to specific circumstances, others experience paralyzing fear without the slightest provocation. Such unwarranted fear is called a
phobia.
•
Phobias
are persistent, irrational fears of an object or situation that, in reality, presents no real threat.
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•
Phobia
, the English word, comes from the Greek word
phobos,
which means “fear, flight or dread.”
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In the New Testament, the word for fear is usually
phobos,
which, in the Greek language, first had the meaning of “flight,” and then later it referred to “that which may cause flight.”
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•
Phobias
grow out of fear when…
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—the fear is clearly
excessive and irrational
(being out of proportion to the actual degree of threat)
—the fear is associated with
avoidance behaviors
(deliberately doing things differently to avoid becoming afraid)
—the fear is associated with
decreased quality of life
(curtailing enjoyment in life)
•
Phobic disorders
consist of persistent,
irrational
fears that impair a person’s ability to function normally.
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—If a phobia causes no major disturbance in a person’s lifestyle, it is not considered a disorder (such as having an excessive fear of snakes, but rarely ever seeing a snake).
—However, a phobic disorder occurs when a phobia gains such power in a person’s life that it drives that person’s thoughts,
perceptions, and actions to the point that his or her entire life is affected (such as a fear of darkness or of people).
—Those who suffer from a phobic disorder experience the most extreme form of fear.
—Not only do those with a phobic disorder live in a constant state of hyper-alertness, their fear also continuously controls their activities, limits their lives, and drastically diminishes their quality of life.
The one who suffers in this way could easily say,
“Fear and trembling seized me and made all my bones shake”
E. What Are Examples of Phobias?(J
OB
4:14).
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The type of phobia a person experiences is determined by the focus of that person’s fear. There are three primary types of phobias, all of which are painfully fear-producing for the sufferer. Typically, those with phobias avoid any thought or sight of the stimulus that triggers a panic attack.
“When I think about this, I am terrified; trembling seizes my body”
Specific Phobias (formerly known as Simple Phobias)(J
OB
21:6).
This type of phobia is marked by a persistent fear experienced in the presence of or in the anticipated encountering of the feared object or situation.
Examples of feared objects:
elevators, spiders, knives, snakes, cats, fire, insects
—
Zoophobia
is the fear of animals, characterized by a sense of danger in the presence of even nonthreatening animals.
Examples of feared situations:
flying, heights, darkness, driving over bridges or through tunnels
—
Acrophobia
is the fear of heights, characterized by feelings of extreme insecurity and of falling even when there is no danger of doing so.
—
Claustrophobia
is the fear of closed spaces, characterized by a sense of being smothered in a confined environment.
This type of phobia is a fear of public embarrassment and is characterized by a paralyzing fear of appearing stupid or being judged as shameful in a social situation.
Examples:
A persistent fear of social situations such as initiating and maintaining a conversation, eating in public, attending a party; also a persistent fear of performance situations such as stage fright and fear of public speaking.
This phobia is the fear of having a panic attack in a place where escape could be difficult or embarrassing. It comes as a result of experiencing repeated panic attacks and is the fear of having yet another panic attack. Therefore, any situation that could cause a sense of panic is avoided.
Example:
Being so afraid of having a panic attack in a public or unfamiliar place that a person becomes homebound or even room bound.
“I so feared the crowd and so dreaded the contempt of the clans that I kept silent and would not go outside”
(J
OB
31:34).
When I first met Patsy Clairmont, I saw her “spiritual sparkle.” Then as we talked in in depth, I saw her spiritual heart.
Patsy Clairmont
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What qualifies a person to speak fearlessly before audiences of tens of thousands, to author more than 20 books, to offer life-changing hope? How about a résumé that includes high school dropout, teenage runaway, prescription drug addict, and a fear-based female with multiple debilitating phobias? Not exactly what you’d consider a likely candidate! But that’s God’s specialty— healing everyday folks and helping them move from fear to faith, from panic to peace.
When Patsy ran away from home, it was all about control. She hated being out of control and wanted to be in control of her life. She partied into the night, smoked, and drank. Though just five feet tall, she wanted to go her own way in a big way. Still, she yearned for stability. So she soon became a teenage bride. But instead of being swept away to an impressive castle to live happily ever after, she found herself living in a depressing tenement infested with rats.
After Patsy’s husband left for 18 months of military duty, their first child was born. Experiencing a sense of wonder and the value of life, Patsy realized there had to be a God. She began attending church…then gave her life to God.
Although she felt a change, her everyday existence remained the same. Disillusioned, she began to blame God for her circumstances. The control she thought she had relinquished to Him resulted in out-of-control behavior.
Patsy’s emotions swung back and forth between anger and fear until one day she grabbed her son’s small chair and threw it at her husband. Although he caught it before it could hit him, Patsy was embarrassed and humiliated. She was overcome by fear, and experienced her first full-blown panic attack. She writes, “Oh, how hard that was for me to wake up in the morning already filled with fear, this ominous thing that I could not touch but that seemed to surround me on all sides. I would think, ‘I haven’t even done anything yet and already it’s hard for me to open my eyes and face yet another day.’ The dread was consuming my energy, the disorder was obvious in my home, in my mind, and in my emotions…”
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At times Patsy’s panic attacks were so severe her husband would take her to the hospital. She would need an injection to help calm her. She said, “The panic attacks were so frightening that I began to feel like I was allergic to my anger, so I tried to push down the anger. As I pushed down the unresolved anger and my unrelenting guilt, what came forth from my life was unreasonable fear.”
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When Patsy realized she was not gaining control of her life, anger seethed inside her from the past. Although she couldn’t remember the early years of her childhood, the signs of trauma—of childhood victimization—began to surface.
Patsy tried desperately to escape her reality. To numb her pain and mute overwhelming fears, she became chemically dependent on tranquilizers, smoked two packs of cigarettes a day, and consumed large amounts of caffeine. Patsy depended on other people and addictive behaviors to attain a measure of control in her life.
Patsy’s mother and husband tried to care for her, but her destructive tendencies began to choke the life out of them as well. Trying to hold onto them as her life raft, Patsy instead started pulling them under. “I seemed to be spiraling down deeper and deeper into this darkness as I would have one fear and give into that. It would call to its friends—‘Over here, you guys!’ And there would be more and more and more.”
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Patsy’s fear escalated to the point that she was afraid of heights, storms, riding in cars, hospitals, elevators, crowds of people, and being all alone. Patsy had no knowledge of diagnosable mental conditions, much less any idea of what the term
agoraphobia
meant, but that did not stop this crippling condition from dominating her life. She isolated herself from society, choosing to live in near-solitary confinement in her home while her mother and husband watched and cared for her as best they could.
Patsy’s condition worsened. Finally her doctor suggested she attend a self-help program. Out of desperation for help, she went. Patsy learned that though her situation was deeply distressing, it wasn’t dangerous. In spite of her fears, she wasn’t going to die. She was given a plan, and that plan gave her hope.
As Patsy began to achieve small successes, she discovered that people liked her. And although the swings between her high and low points were great, she began to get a handle on her symptoms.
Then a friend called with an idea and prefaced it by saying that she wanted Patsy
to consider what God wanted her to do.
Suddenly Patsy became responsible
to God
instead of to her friend. Her friend’s idea was for Patsy to go to a weekend retreat.
“For someone with agoraphobia, that was a major decision,” she admitted, “to leave the safety of home and to make sure I had enough tranquilizers to be in control of the situation, to purposefully put myself in the midst of over three thousand women. Just the thought of hours in a car to reach my destination frightened me because just to go from my home to the grocery store was a major trip and I could only go if my husband drove me.”
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However, Patsy did find the courage to attend the retreat— courage in the face of her fear. And while she was there, she heard truth that challenged her to be set free: “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:2).
Patsy knew she needed to be transformed. Romans 12:2 told her she could accomplish that by the renewing of her mind—and that with a renewed mind, she would not live the rest of her life controlled by fear, but be able to experience God’s perfect will for her.
Patsy began to apply the truths of the Bible to her everyday living. Her addictive and destructive choices were replaced with Bible study, prayer, and changed patterns of thinking. Her life became transformed as she kicked the smoking habit, overcame her dependency on tranquilizers, and gained control over her panic attacks. With a renewed mind and with renewed hope from Christ, she experienced total transformation.
Patsy was once fearful of leaving her own home. But since her transformation, she has shared her story with over three million people—providing hope for healing, humor for the heart, and
fearlessly
standing tall.