Authors: Nancy Frederick
Kevin returned his gaze toward the pitch
,
but it was too late
,
and the ball smashed into his crotch
,
causing him to collapse.
“
Ball one!
”
said the umpire.
“
Glad she
’
s not soft on me
,”
intoned the catcher.
From where he lay on the ground groaning and scowling
,
Kevin caught a glimpse of Barb laughing on the pitcher
’
s mound. That bitch!
Butch seethed as she started the car. Turning toward Wimp righteously
,
she snapped her crop at him.
“
You totally missed him. You were supposed to hit him.
”
Wimp
,
his heart still racing
,
spoke up with uncharacteristic assertiveness.
“
Who do you think I am
,
Ryan Nolan
?
I
’
m not um-um-um—Kevin Costner.
”
Butch remained livid.
“
Yeah
,
well—neither is he. And you know what
?
Neither are you.
”
Butch pulled the car out and sped away
,
barely listening to Wimp
,
who was suggesting that being nutcracked with a softball was punishment enough.
- FOUR –
“
How
’
s Kevin doing today
?”
asked Bill
,
wincing a little.
“
Still icing the crown jewels. Wouldn
’
t he be okay by
now
?”
asked Laura.
“
It can vary. Look it
’
s right down here.
”
They were heading toward Angie
’
s deli
,
and as they walked past Zero Tolerance
,
Bill said
,
“
She
’
s a patient.
”
Spotting a couple smoking
,
Laura removed a flyer from her bag
,
handed it to them and said sincerely but with a touch too much emotion
,
“
You
’
re cremating yourselves alive!
”
Holding Angie
’
s card
,
Bill opened the door to It
’
s Delish
,
and looked around at the small deli
,
which had only a few customers seated here and there. A counter girl gazed at them with an unremarkable degree of disinterest. After mentioning his reason for being there
,
she shouted
,
“
Hey
,
Angie.
”
It took only a moment for Angie to emerge from the kitchen in her chef
’
s whites. Recognizing Bill
,
she registered a look of concern. Why was he here
?
Had something happened to Dr. Flicker
?
“
Oh
,”
she said
,
“
Hello.
”
Bill smiled at her in a friendly way and said
“
I didn
’
t realize this was a deli. We could have had lunch here.
”
“
We
’
re planning a party
,”
said Laura.
“
Oh
,
I see
,”
said Angie
,
relieved.
“
A party. Somehow I thought you were here because….
Well
,
never mind
,
come—have a seat.
”
Bill and Laura sat down and waited only briefly as Angie disappeared and reappeared
,
bringing a large tray holding many small plates
,
each containing only a couple nibbles on them. Angie took a seat at the table with them so she could discuss the offerings and make suggestions. With great effort to maintain a polite demeanor
,
Bill and Laura began tasting the food and their faces revealed only surprise
,
concealed dislike
,
and ultimately puzzlement about what they actually were eating.
Angie remained oblivious and said
,
“
Yes
,
that
’
s right—buffalo pâté.
”
Laura couldn
’
t quite believe what she was asking
,
“
Isn
’
t this caramel inside this meatball
?”
Angie smiled excitedly.
“
Yes! Do you like it
?
I haven
’
t tasted most of these items—the diet you know—but I
’
m going for real cutting edge cuisine. Oblivious to what was transpiring behind her
,
Angie didn
’
t notice as Butch and Wimp at a neighboring table gazed at each other with disgust. Butch began coughing and almost turned green. Suspiciously
,
Wimp lifted his plate and sniffed it before almost gagging. Together they rose
,
as she tossed a bill onto the table and they hightailed it out of the deli.
“
You know
,”
mused Bill softly
,
“
Something a bit more simple might be best. Chinese chicken salad.
”
“
Poached salmon
,”
added Laura.
Enthused
,
Angie replied
,
“
I just created a saffron-curry sauce with chopped octopus and deep fried cilantro.
”
“
Maybe on the side
,”
said Laura politely.
Chrissy was having a horrifically frustrating conversation with someone she was certain was a brain dead liar.
“
Yes
,
I
do
want to talk to the manager
,”
she said with extreme irritation
,
“
It
’
s just impossible for me to take you seriously. There
’
s no way you didn
’
t notice. You
’
re not disabled
,
are you
?”
Nonplussed
,
the little idiot said
,
“
I
’
ll get Joan.
”
“
Hurry
,
will you
,”
said Chrissy
,
seething. She untied a jaunty bandana knotted around her neck and mopped her brow with it. Almost gasping for air
,
she wondered would she faint. Clutching one of the exercise machines
,
she lowered herself down onto it
,
then in an act of extreme desperation pressed the bandana over her face
,
covering mouth and nose. She took several breaths
,
growing even more agitated. It didn
’
t help. It didn
’
t help. Air
,
she thought
,
oh clean air.
Joan arrived and leaned over her with an aura of deep concern. She smiled and patted Chrissy on the shoulder.
“
Are you all right
?”
she asked.
With what appeared to be SARS level terror
,
Chrissy removed the bandana from her face and attempted to breathe but immediately began choking and gasping. In between gasps for unpolluted air
,
she managed to squeeze out a few words
,
“
This place reeks!
”