If I'd Only Known (Milan Women Series Book 1) (11 page)

“And
you’re just too nosey for your own good,” Perri retorted.

“Um,
because I can see you’re really upset and trying your best not to cry, Perri,
I’ll let it go for now,” Tyler conceded. “But I do intend to get to the bottom
of this before any of us leaves this house,” she said loud enough for Hunter to
hear.

“I
couldn’t agree more,” Hunter said. “I’m with you on this, Tyler. Finally, there
is someone else in here with a little common sense.”

Perri
glared toward the kitchen. “Are you calling me stupid, Hunter?”

“Perri—”

“Where
is my niece?” Tyler cut in as she rubbed her hands together and smiled ready to
play.

“She
should be with her father right about now,” Hunter informed Tyler, “but Miss
stubborn pants over yonder refuses to let him see her.”

Perri
snorted. “Hunter, now you just flat out lying; nobody refused to let anybody
see anybody.” Looking at their little sister, she complained, “Do you see what
I mean? She just doesn’t know when to quit.”

Instead
of taking sides Tyler asked, “What does she mean?”

Smacking
her lips, Perri said, “I guess you going to find out soon enough, so you might
as well get the real story,” she said loud enough for Hunter to hear.

“Ha,
ha, ha,” Hunter scoffed. “Depends on whose eyes you’re looking through,” she
remarked to no one in particular.

Ignoring
her, Perri turned her attention to Tyler. “I ran into Barrington.”

Tyler’s
light gray eyes got big as two quarters. “Ooh.” She covered her mouth, falling
into the chair behind her the way she did when a dirty secret was being
revealed on
As The World Turns
. “No you didn’t.”

Amused
and amazed at her sister’s animated dramatics Perri laughed and nodded. “It’s
true, little sister. Barrington knows about Imani.”

“Wow,”
Tyler said to no one in particular.

“You
can say that again.”

Dazed,
Tyler remarked, “Now I know what all the fuss was about.” She locked eyes with
her sister and asked, “How did he react?”

“Humph,”
Perri scoffed. “He was hurt. Wanted to know why I kept him in the dark.”

“And
you said?”

“What
could I say? Other than I didn’t want to mess up his career.”

Hunter
came back into the living room holding a glass of iced tea. “Which was a
bold-face lie,” she announced, plopping down on the sofa, tucking her legs
under her. “This was about your selfishness and need to control every situation
in which there is a potential for you to get hurt,” she accused.

“Hunter,
I’m talking to Tyler now.” Perri glared at her. “And you are working my last
nerve with severity, girl.”

“Good!
Maybe now you won’t have the nerve to continue trying to keep that man from
seeing his own child,” Hunter retorted.

“So
um,” Tyler intervened, “what are you going to do, Perri?”

Wordlessly
Perri shrugged.

“You
know what she needs to do, right?”

“Hunter,
please, okay,” Tyler shot her older sister a warning look.

“What,
Tyler? The man has s right to see his child,” Hunter insisted.

“No
one’s arguing that point. All I’m saying is Perri has a right to decide when
and where that happens, considering she’s the only parent Imani knows.” Tyler
shook her head. “It’s going to take time for all of them to adjust. You can’t
just expect Perri to send her daughter off—”

“She’s
his daughter, too,” Hunter was quick to remind her.

“Yes
she is, Hunter. That’s not going to change just because Barrington has to wait
a little while longer.” Tyler shrugged unsure herself. “Give the situation time
for everyone to adjust to it. For myself, I know I’d worry about Imani, not
knowing his people and how they are, so I can only imagine how Perri must be
feeling. She is her mother and the one who has been with Imani the longest.”

“That’s
not Barrington’s fault,” Hunter said in his defense. “Perri created this
situation with her outright dishonesty.”

“And
you feel the need to throw this in her face because what?” Tyler wanted to
know. “Should she be condemned the rest of her life because she made a onetime
past
mistake? If anybody else treated her like you’re doing and said the things
you’re saying to her you’d be all up in their face ready to take them out.”

“I’m
not anybody else, Tyler. Hunter shook her head strongly disagreeing. “As
Perri’s sister I’m not afraid to tell her the truth.”

Tyler
sighed long and hard. “She made a mistake, Hunter. Cut her some slack.”

“A
mistake is accidently picking up the wrong cat food, Tyler. Per her usual,
Perri made a judgmental call without giving thought to anyone else’s feelings.”

“Hunter,
that’s not fair. You know Perri has one of the kindest hearts you’re ever going
to meet,” Tyler said defensively.

“Yes,
Tyler,” Hunter agreed. “When she’s not being self-righteous Perris does have a
heart of gold. Still the fact is she should have told Barrington she pregnant
and then, on his own accord, allowed him to choose what side he was going to
come down on.” Seeing the hurt and tears in both her sister’s eyes, she
softened her tone. “Look, Perri, you know I love you and I will always be down
for you. But right is right and wrong is wrong. And you were dead wrong not to
tell Barrington about Imani.”

“Hunter,
please,” Tyler said exasperated.

Perri
shook her head. “No, Tyler, it’s okay. Hunter is right. I should have told
Barrington. I know I was wrong not to.” Hunter reached for her hand giving it a
light squeeze. Perri smiled weakly. “But . . . .” she started then stopped.

Taking
her other hand, Tyler inquired softly, “But what, baby?”

“I’m
scared,” Perri confessed as tears rolled down her face.

“Scared
of what, honey?” Hunter wanted to know.

“Losing
my daughter to the father she never knew.” She sniffed. “Because of me I could
lose the leading role in my child’s life,” Perri said around a sob.

Both
Hunter and Tyler had tears in their eyes.

“You’re
not going to lose Imani’s love,” Tyler assured her.

“Yeah,
like we’d ever let that happen. You know the Milan sisters are a force to
reckon with,” Hunter added.

In
spite of her gloom mood, Perri laughed. “Thanks for being here for me, you
guys.”

“Where
else would we be?” Hunter asked.

“Yeah,”
Tyler said, “what are best sisters for?”

They
all shared a laugh engaging in a group hug.

“I
guess I better get going.”

“No,”
Tyler protested. “It’s too soon. I just got here.”

“I
know, sweetie; but I left Imani with Madear, so I really need to get over there
and pick her up. Speaking of which, can you guys please do me a favor?”

“Anything,”
Tyler said, “you know that.”

“Within
reason,” Hunter interjected.

Not
trying to go there with Hunter again, Perri simple said, “Can you please let me
tell Madear about this in my own time? No sense in getting her all stirred up
about this until I have concrete answers to give her.”

“I
agree. My lips are sealed,” Tyler promised.

They
looked at Hunter knowing she would not go along so easily. She believed in
getting everything out in the open.

“Personally,
I don’t agree. However, I will respect your decision, Perri. Just don’t wait
too long to bring Madear up to date on the situation. As much as she likes to
visit with Imani, there is bound to be a conflict
when
Barrington may
request to see her, too.”

“I
won’t. Thank you both.” Perri stood and glanced at her watch. “Besides,
Barrington is supposed to call to set up a time to visit with Imani this
afternoon.”

“Oh,”
Tyler said, biting her lower lip. “Is that good or bad?” she wondered.

Hunter
spoke up. “It’s a good thing. Right, Perri?”

Perri
laughed. “You just don’t give up, girl.”

“And
you know this.” Hunter and Tyler laughed.

Perris
shook her head at her beautiful sisters. “You are not well, Hunter. To answer
your question, Tyler, yeah, it is a good thing.” She paused thoughtfully. “I
won’t keep Barrington from seeing Imani.” She grinned. “Does that please you,
big sis?”

“More
than you know, Perri. It’s for the best. You’ll see,” Hunter promised.

“And
you, Perri?” Tyler wanted to know. “How do you fit into the equation?”

“In
the past,” she told them. “I’m not going back there with Barrington again. I
cannot handle that kind of pain and heartbreak a second time.”

“I
feel you,” Tyler said.

Taking
a deep cleansing breath, Perri hugged and kissed her sisters. “I love you guys.
Talk to y’all later.”

“Count
on it. And I love you, too,” Hunter said returning her hug and kiss.

“I
love you, Perri, and I’m always on your side. Remember that. I’ll call you
later,” Tyler said and walked her to the door.

“Talk
to you then, sweetie.” Perri disappeared out the door.

Barrington
flipped through the photo album looking at pictures of him and Perri at a time
in their lives when both were happy just to be in the presence of the other.

What
the hell happened?

The
moment he watched Perri wheel Imani away at the mall, he’d replayed their
history together, trying to make sense of the times they once shared. No matter
how his mind spent the situation it only led to confusion when he recalled
their last night together, when apparently, their daughter had been conceived.
He had noticed that she kept insinuating that he’d just up and left her, making
it sound like all he did was use her body for his own personal pleasure. That
was so far from the truth he couldn’t even begin to wrap his mind around how
she could have believed it in the first place. The first time he met Perri he
had known she was different from other females even before he ever talked to
her. She was innocent and sexy all rolled up into one.

The
woman made him feel things he’d never before felt and that had him wanting to
honestly get to know her, all about her likes, dislikes; what made her mad,
what made her smile. He remembered wanting to know it all and at the time he
hadn’t even kissed her yet. His daddy had always told him and his brother one
day a woman would come along and they would want to court her the old fashioned
way. Of course neither he nor Crush had been trying to hear that nonsense back
then. Barrington had never courted any woman in his life, didn’t want to. Until
he met Perri and from the first look at her, before he was ready to admit it,
he knew he was going to court her the old fashioned way, just like his daddy
had predicted he would someday.

They
became fast friends, and over the course of the first year, they became
strictly best friends. Confiding in one another came natural and they knew
things about each other they would take to the grave. They got on each other’s
nerves at times and sometimes he wanted to choke the daylights out of her
because she had such a smart mouth. But they got each other and they always had
each other’s back. He knew with her he could always be himself. Then one day,
together, they made a mutual decision that they needed more from each other.
While that should have probably scared him, he embraced the idea with open arms,
heart, and mind.

For
the next year and a half, Barrington did just that and he began to court Perri.
Not one time did he pressure her for more and though he was highly sexually
attracted to her, he refused to press her for more than the heavy petting they
did. He was sure Perri thought that he was sleeping around while on the road,
but it wasn’t true. Sure, he went out with a few women here and there, but he
did not sleep with them, not that he hadn’t been tempted to cave in to his
carnal urges. That’s when he would force his mind to think about Perri and what
she meant to him and if he really thought losing her was worth free tail from
just about any female he continued to meet and greet. It wasn’t worth it to him
to risk losing his sweet Perri over. Perri was the real deal and Barrington’s
fate had been sealed the moment he met her. After that he stopped going out
with other women, period and became married to his job instead. He and Perri
had been dating exclusively ever since then. It wasn’t easy maintaining a long
distance relationship, but he was determined to do it, flying Perri out to some
of their concerts and spending all his time with her when he was back home,
sometimes with her staying overnight in his guest bedroom or him staying
overnight in her guest bedroom. But for some reason Barrington never could
understand, Perri had never cared too much for his housekeeper and not wanting
to fight about it, he mostly stayed over at her place when he wasn’t on the
road. They both put forth the extra effort to make it work. Everything was
golden between them up until that first and last night they spent together when
he had to leave town on the spur of the moment. That was the day Perri gave him
her virginity. It was also the last time he saw her before today at the mall.

Why
the hell didn’t he just wake Perri up before he left town that night?

Every
fiber in his being wished he could turn back the hands of time. On the other
hand, his mind played devil’s advocate, why the hell didn’t she accept my phone
calls? Wondering that just pissed him off. It just didn’t make any sense to
him. Barrington ran his finger over a photo of Perri pouting because he had to
go out of town on the spur of the moment. He had to laugh remembering how he
had to win her two stuffed animals and buy her three funnel cakes at Carrowinds
before she would let him off the hook for promising to spend the entire weekend
with her without any interruptions. She didn’t know it, but he would have done
anything not to have been the one responsible for that sad look in her eyes.

Was
that why she just cut all ties with him? Had it really been about his music
career?

He
suddenly resented his chosen career field. The regret only lasted a minute or
two before he reminded himself that Perri was his biggest supporter and best
friend, so her pulling away from him really couldn’t have had anything to do
with his musical career.

“Sir,
will you need me anymore this evening?” Nia Eusebio, his housekeeper asked in
her Puerto Rican accent.

Barrington
laid the photo album to the side and stood. “No, Nia, you may go on home now.
He forced a courtesy smile for the sake of the attractive Latino woman, whom he
knew, as always was going out of her way to show concern for his well-being.
“Thank you for asking, though.”

Nia
smiled at her boss affectionately.

If
Barrington noticed her personal attraction to him he didn’t let on.

“I
assure you it is my pleasure, sir.”

Barrington
laughed out loud, glad for the humorous distraction from the current chaos his
life had become. It suddenly occurred to him that he hadn’t yet paid Nia and
apologized to her. “Please forgive my oversight,” he said, embarrassed as he
reached into his wallet and pulled out three crisp one hundred dollar bills. In
light of the news he’d received earlier, he’d totally forgotten that he still
needed to cut his housekeeper a payroll check. “I hope cash is all right this
time. I forgot to—”

“Cash
is fine, sir,” Nia interjected, not wanting him to stress out on her account.
The truth is, she longed to be the woman to stroke his stress away as she
secretly wished that he were her payment for the evening. Feeling heat infuse
her cheeks and needing to temporarily avert her heated gaze she glanced over to
the photo album on the sofa, revealing pictures of
that
woman.
So her
boss was still hung up on Perri?
A root of bitterness quickly sprang up in
her heart. What was the stronghold she held over him, anyway?

“Nia,
are you all right?” Barrington called out to her a second time, still holding
the bills out to her, not missing the fact that she’d been focused on what he
was doing before she came into the living room.

“Yes,
sir,” Nia said, embarrassed that she hadn’t heard him the first time. “Sir,
please forgive me for my lack of focus.”

“It’s
all right, Nia,” Barrington assured her. “However, it is getting late and I
don’t want you out wandering around at night by yourself, so I’ll have
Charlucchi drive you home if that’s okay with you.”

Nia
smiled her appreciation, touched by his thoughtfulness.
He does care about me.
“That would be lovely, Sir. Thank you.” She accepted the money, briefly touching
his outstretched hand.

“As
always, Nia, I want to thank you for a job well done.” Barrington couldn’t help
feeling sorry for her, knowing that she didn’t have any family in the States to
speak of. He knew she was only a few years older than he was which would make
her about twenty-eight; he thought it an utter shame that someone hadn’t
snagged her up yet. It certainly wasn’t because of looks, because she was
beautiful in an exotic way. And her accent alone would drive most men wild
beyond taming.

“Nia,
do you have a boyfriend?” He knew he was prying, but he couldn’t help but think
what a cute couple she and his cousin Kane would make.

Nia
lit up like a Christmas tree, “No, sir, not at all.
This was it! He was
going to ask her out!
“Why do you ask?” she couldn’t wait to go out with
him.

“I
know this is none of my business, Nia, so tell me to butt out anytime. But I
have a cousin I’d like to introduce you to. I mean, if you’d be interested in
meeting him, that is.”

Nia
fought to keep an unreadable look in her eyes along with a fake smile plastered
on her lips. “That’s very kind of you, sir.”

“But?”
he asked, hearing the reservation in her tone.

Nia
simply shook her head in response.

Barrington
nodded and smiled. “But you’d rather find your own man.”

“You
can say something like that,” she said.  She was uncomfortable with him playing
matchmaker.

“I
understand, Nia. But you know what? Maybe he’s already looking for you.”

Nia
couldn’t help smiling at him affectionately.”I hope so, sir. I hope so.”

An
idea occurred to Barrington. “Nia, it’s been awhile since you had a vacation,
hasn’t it?”

“I
suppose so, but I’m okay with that.”
He just couldn’t send her away.

“Point
is you shouldn’t have to be okay with it.” Barrington pulled out several
hundred more dollars from his wallet. “I want you to take the next two weeks
off and go on a long overdue vacation, Nia. Go somewhere warm and fun. Perhaps
even a trip back home,” he suggested, handing her the additional bills.

“Sir,
that really is not necessary. I’m fine with my life the way it is. Really I
am.”

Barrington
shook his head firmly, his mind made up. “I insist, Nia.”

“Yes,
sir,” Nia simply said, accepting the money as she swallowed her pride and
disappointment. “Thank you, sir.”

“You’re
very welcome, Nia.” Barrington was glad he could do something good for someone
since he couldn’t seem to make heads or tails where Perri, the true love of his
life was concerned.