If You Only Knew (And Then Came Love Book 1) (40 page)

“Put that one on first, he picked out for you.”

“From rehab?” Liza raised her eyebrow. “He’s looking at maternity wear in rehab?”

Audrey and Terra followed Ava in and shut the door.

“He picked it out before you went to rehab.” Audrey carried a bag and placed it on the couch. “I told him about the maternity shoot Jake and I did when I was pregnant. He had it all planned before everything went downhill.”

Audrey looked at Alexis and then around at her friends. She played with the bow on the box. “I hate to be ungrateful, but he gets home tomorrow, I’d really rather do it with him.”

“He wants pictures of you, Liza. You two can take pictures tomorrow, let today be about you.”

She let out a heavy breath. “All right.”

*****

Liza sat on the bed, blinking rapidly, trying to control the tears threatening to ruin her make-up. Ava did her hair. It was piled on top of her head in a loose bun, curls spilling down framing her face. She wore a black lace bra and panties with a sheer black lace gown over the top of them.

Resting her hand on her belly, she spoke to Abigail. “I know your daddy wants this, but I’m not feeling it. I just want him home, Abby. Home and with us.” She closed her eyes fighting the tears.

“Would you do the photo shoot if I was here?”

Julian’s voice echoed in her mind. Almost as if it were real. She opened her eyes and they grew wide as she saw him standing in the doorway. Her hand flew to her mouth and she met him halfway, collapsing in his arms. “I can’t believe you’re here.” Her heart soared and the sobs escaped against his chest.

Julian wrapped his arms around her. “God, I’ve missed you being in my arms. It feels like a lifetime ago.”

The camera flash shone as Alexis caught his homecoming on film.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming home?” Liza wiped at his shirt where, what she could only assume, was her smeared make up, had transferred to his shirt.

She squeezed as tight as she could, not wanting to let him go. Heat radiated from his body, she could feel the love pouring out of him. Home. It wasn’t a physical location, no it was wherever her and Julian were together.

“I wanted to surprise you. Doc told me I could go home at three today or I could wait until tomorrow and I couldn’t wait to see you.” Julian pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Liza brought her hands up to his neck and pulled his lips to hers. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.”

Alexis tapped him on the shoulder. “I’m going to leave you two, when you’re ready to finish this let me know.”

“Thanks, Alexis.” Julian smiled. He picked up the charm of the necklace. “I didn’t think you’d wear it.”

“I haven’t taken it off.” She touched his hand. “It gets tangled with Grandma’s every now and then, but it’s worth it.”

He cupped her cheeks in his hand and kissed her again. “I’ve missed you.” He rested his head against hers and touched her belly.

Abigail kicked.

Julian grinned. “She knows me.” He got down on her knees and kissed her belly. “You know little girl, you and your mother are what kept me going through all of this. There were days I wanted to give up. Say fuck it, come home and have a drink, but I pushed through.”

Liza smacked him on the arm. “Watch your language when you’re talking to Abigail.”

Laughing, Julian led her over to the bed. He helped Liza on to the bed, before he sat down beside her. “My fight isn’t over. I wish it were, but it’s going to take some time for me to get to the point I’m not craving alcohol. I’ll always be an alcoholic.”

She intertwined her fingers with his, craving his touch, and rested her head against his shoulder. “I know.”

“I’m not always going to be the nicest person during this process, but I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Liza looked up at him. “You better not be proposing.”

Julian brushed a kiss across her lips. “Wouldn’t dream of it. I’m trying to apologize without saying the words that piss you off.”

She laughed. “Then you’re forgiven.”

“Am I really?” He ran his fingers down her face. “I was a prick before I left, Liza. It had a lot to do with the alcohol, but also with my own insecurities. I’m not blaming the alcohol and I’m not blaming my disorder. I’m trying to accept my own actions. I made the accusations, I picked up the bottle, and I left you. There’s no one to blame but myself.”

“And you’ve taken one helluva step to your recovery, but we’ll fight through this together.” Liza brought his hands to her lips. “I love you.”

“I’ve been waiting twenty-eight days to hear you say that.” He smiled. “I love you, too, Liza.” He hauled her onto his lap and held her tight.

*****

December 13
th

Julian stood outside Rick and Sally’s house. He raised his hand to knock when the door opened. Sally crossed her arms over her chest. “I didn’t expect to see you until Liza went into labor.”

“I know I’m not your favorite person, but if you don’t mind, I’d like a few minutes of your time. Yours and Rick’s if he’s available.”

Sally stepped out of the way and gestured for Julian to come in.

“Thank you.”

“What are you doing here?” Rick looked up from his spot at the kitchen table.

“I hoped to speak to you two about Liza.”

Sally motioned for him to have a seat and sat down across from Rick.

Julian took the seat at the end of the table. He was about to be grilled, but this was important. “I’m in love with your daughter—”

“You’re going to ask for our permission to marry her, aren’t you?” Rick rested his chin on his hands.

Julian nodded.

“What if we say no?” Rick raised his eyebrows.

He looked down at his hands. “I guess I’ll hold off until I’ve redeemed myself a little more.”

Sally raised her eyebrow. “You’d hold off if we said no?”

“I love your daughter, Sally. I hurt her. I want to do what I can to make up for it.” Julian shoved his hand in his pocket. Looked like he’d be waiting.

Sally exchanged a glance with Rick. “I didn’t think marriage was in your plans. Everything I heard was you didn’t want a third ex-wife.”

“I don’t, but I met a wonderful woman who’s changed every belief I’ve ever had about marriage. I want her as my wife. There won’t be a third ex-wife. There will only be my last wife.”

Sally smiled at Rick.

Rick shrugged. “Are you sure you’re done with the alcohol?”

“I’ll always be an alcoholic, that will never change, but as far as where I’m at, I’m recovering.” He held up his fingers and began to check them off as he went down the list. “I’ve admitted I have a problem. I completed my rehab program. I’m seeking help from people who’ve struggled with the same problem.”

“Your next step would be triggers if I remember right.” Sally tapped the table with her finger. “What are your triggers?”

“When I don’t take my meds, fighting with your daughter, when my mind gets out of control.”

“What about going to bars or restaurants where they serve alcohol?” Rick said.

Julian shook his head. “I’ve played DD for my brothers so long going into a bar doesn’t bother me. I’m not a social drinker. I drink when I’m alone.”

Sally stood and headed into the kitchen. She returned with a glass of water and handed it to him. “And how are you going to deal with being alone then?”

“Thank you.” He took a drink. “One step at a time.”

“Good.” Sally rubbed her hand on her arm. “What’s the next step?”

“You’re going to make me go through all of them, aren’t you?”

“Yep.” Sally nodded. “You want to marry our daughter, we want to know a thing or two.”

Maybe they would say yes. He smiled and went back to the steps. “I’ve talked to my family and friends, they’re willing to help me out and I’m willing to accept their advice. They’ve been trying to get me to quit drinking for quite a while, so I believe they will help.”

“And then comes the amends.” Rick leaned forward to look at Julian. “Have you made amends with our daughter?”

Julian clasped his hands together in his lap and looked down at them. “I don’t ever think I’ll be able to make up for what I did to Liza. She’s forgiven me, but I’m still making up for it.” His gaze darted between Sally and Rick. “You two are on the list as well. I hate that I hurt you as well. And knowing you two would be okay with me marrying her would go a long way in completing this process.”

“So are you saying us saying yes would make it easier on you?” Sally tried to hold back the smile by biting her lip.

Heat crept up Julian’s cheeks. “That’s not what—”

“I’m joking. Continue.”

“I’m willing to help others through their journey and I appreciate what my family and friends have sacrificed for me. Especially, Liza.”

“Sounds like you’re well on your way to recovery.” Sally smiled. “If you want our forgiveness and our permission you have to make us a promise.”

“Anything.” Julian’s heart beat faster. Were they going to say yes?

“Promise us, you’ll talk to her. Rather than accusing or getting angry, talk to her. Your thoughts may be racing around in your head, but she’s a person, too.” Sally reached out and squeezed his hand.

“Does that mean you’re giving me permission to marry your daughter?” Julian let a grin cross his face.

Rick shook his head. “No, you have our blessing to marry our daughter, you never needed our permission.”

Julian let out a breath and pressed his eyes closed. He bit his bottom lip. He thought his heart forgot how to beat. He blinked, and then blinked back tears. Of all the people in Liza’s life, he never thought they’d agree. He sniffed, then wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt. He smiled as he looked at Liza’s parents. “Thank you.”

“Do you have the ring?” Sally clasped her hands together.

Julian pulled the diamond solitaire out of his pocket along with the matching wedding ring and handed them to Sally. “They’re my grandmother’s. The other half of the one she’s wearing now.”

Sally peaked inside to see the engraving on the wedding band. “Do you mean what is engraved here?”

“
Senza di te non sono niente?” He nodded. “Without your daughter, I am nothing.”

Sally handed him the rings and stood opening her arms to him. “Welcome to the family.”

“Thank you.” Julian hugged his future mother-in-law and did the same for his future father-in-law.

Rick then held out his hand out. “Welcome to the family.”

Julian smiled as he shook Rick’s hand. Now to find the perfect time to pop the question.

*****

December 17
th

Abigail Kathryne Ivy Vitalli

Born 12/16/2012 at 9:19 PM

8 pounds 7 ounces

20 inches long

Liza smiled as she read the sign attached to her daughter’s hospital bassinet. She’d placed Abby in the bassinet a few minutes before. Every fifteen minutes her daughter was awake and wanting to eat again. Then she’d sleep for two hours and Liza could rest. The nurses called it cluster feeding, Liza called it exhaustive.

Her eyes were closing when she saw Julian enter the room.

He stopped at the bassinet and ran his fingers over his daughters dark hair. He came around the bed and grinned at Liza. “Don’t stay awake on my behalf, princess.” Pressing a kiss against her forehead and then handed her a bouquet of purple tulips.

“I thought purple tulips were apology tulips.” Her words were slow as her eyes drifted closed. She forced them open.

“You deserve an apology after that delivery. I don’t know how you did it, but I have a newfound respect for women — especially you.” Julian took the flowers, picked up the vase he’d brought with and went about filling it up with water.

A quiet knock on the door had them both turning.

Dr. Marcus joined them. “How’s the lovely Miss Liza doing?” He peaked at the baby, before looking at Liza.

“Tired doesn’t even begin to describe it.”

“She did great, Doc. I’m impressed.” Julian walked over, put the flowers on the bedside table and rested his hand on Liza’s shoulder.

“I’m not going to stick around long. I wanted to make sure you were all doing all right and check in with, Daddy. It’s a stressful time.” Dr. Marcus glanced at Julian.

“I’m doing all right. You’re right it has been stressful.” He grasped Liza’s hand. “I won’t lie, I’ve thought about drinking, but these two beautiful girls are keeping me grounded.”

“Good.” Dr. Marcus pulled a letter out of his pocket and handed it to Liza. “This is from Dr. Muller. I think you’ll like what it says.” He reached across the bed to shake Julian’s hand, before turning and waving. “I’ll catch you all later.”

Liza opened the letter and began to read. “Ms. Thomas
,
It has come to our attention that your choice to terminate your employment at our facility was due to a hostile work environment. We believe the factors that created the environment are no longer present. As such, organization would like to extend you an offer of reinstatement. Furthermore, the position of Clinical Director has become vacant and we would be pleased to offer you that position should you choose to accept it.