Just Breathe Trilogy Box Set (109 page)

“Would you mind if we sit in the back of the car?” Dr. Callahan questions gently when I’m finished.

“No,” I reply rather calmly.

Joe sits in the front passenger seat while the doctor and I take the back seats with Sadie. The doctor has Joe hand me the device and then records more numbers. My leg begins to bounce and I notice the numbers for my heart rate changing again. The doctor has me repeat some of the previous tapping segments for the next few minutes.

I sit patiently for his next instruction while he writes something on his notepad.

“Your leg isn’t bouncing, Emma,” Joe mentions.

I look down and am surprised to see that it’s calm. Oddly, my palms aren’t sweaty.

“Joe, would you mind starting the car for us, please?” Dr. Callahan requests.

Joe gets out of the passenger side and walks around the front of the car.

“Emma,” the doctor calls.

“Yes?”

“Where were you in the car the night of the accident?” Dr. Callahan asks.

Irritation rises inside, not liking the fact that Joe has given him that much information. “In the back seat, laying down,” I answer with a tight jaw.

“Were you awake when it happened?” the doctor checks.

“No,” I answer with a tightening throat.

The doctor jumps right into another round of tapping sequences after he has me tell him a number between one and ten. When my number decreases from a ten to a three, he asks if I would mind if Joe started to drive the car around the track at ten miles per hour.

I nervously agree.

Back and forth the doctor asks me what I’m feeling and instructs me on what to do when I’m not holding the device. In time, the three of us are buckled and Joe is driving the car at sixty miles per hour and I feel as calm as a cool summer’s breeze.

When we arrive back to where we started by the table, Dr. Callahan has me get into the front passenger seat. We take several laps around the track while he has me continue with several other algorithms. As we stop again, Joe mentions something that catches me slightly off guard.

“What?” I snap.

The doctor goes through his process again, not commenting about what Joe had suggested. Ten minutes later, Dr. Callahan asks me the same question. “How would you feel having a driving lesson today?”

“Ummm . . . what did you have in mind?” I ask.

Joe’s face beams with excitement.

“Just you sitting where Joe is and we give you a few simple basic instructions about driving, but you don’t turn on the car or drive,” the doctor explains further.

Shrugging my shoulders, I say, “I guess.”

As if I’ve done it before, I get out of the car and move to the driver side. Joe holds the door open for me and closes it once I’m in. He then jogs around to the front passenger seat while the doctor stays where he’s been the whole time. The car is off and the doctor poses his questions again along with another round of tapping.

“Emma,” the doctor calls.

“Yes?”

He repeats one of his earlier questions about the accident, asking me a more vivid question and requests for me to expound on my description of what I remember. After several more numbers and sequences, he repeats the question. “Looks like we’re done for the day,” the doctor announces. “How do you feel, Emma?”

“Good,” I answer truthfully.

The three of us leave the car with Sadie and sit down at the table where we started. Drinks are brought out to us as Dr. Callahan begins to show me the results and explains what everything means.

I’m shocked to see the dramatic change in numbers during each step of the process as well as the fact that I don’t feel angry, sad or anxious when I think of cars, the accident or my parents. How can this be? I mean, I can understand with all of the natural health and wellness I’ve learned over the years, but I’m not freaking out and am actually excited by the idea of learning how to drive a car.

Before we part ways, the doctor leaves me with a bunch of information, several books and instructions, including his contact information if I should need to get a hold of him. He shares that any time a negative emotion comes up in my life, to any situation, to try associating which exact emotion it is and using the tapping sequence that is specific to it. Apparently, I shouldn’t ever have this kind of a reaction to thinking or being in a vehicle again, whether I think of my parents and their death.

A strong desire to visit Mr. and Mrs. Nelson, Brittany, Leslie, Martin and Celia rush over me as well as to take care of my parents home. Where is all of this coming from?

When Joe and I leave the speedway, I find myself a little tired and close my eyes while leaning on his shoulder in the back seat. Peace and contentedness fill my heart and I’m eager to know where our next adventure for the day will be — if there is one.

“Emma,” Joe’s voice calls.

“Hmmm?”

“Emma, beautiful.”

I groan a little and turn into him.

“It’s time for lunch.”

“Yum, I’m starving,” I reply, keeping my eyes closed and nuzzling his chest more. “Where are we going to eat?”

“We’re here,” Joe announces with a hint of amusement in his tone.

“What do you mean?” I inquire, lifting my head and peering around.

“You fell asleep about a minute into the drive,” Joe mentions.

“I did?” I return with surprise. My eyes catch a smudge on his shirt and realize that it’s drool. I rush to wipe it off, but he stops me.

“It’s okay,” Joe chuckles. “It’ll dry off in no time.”

My brows lift. “Seriously?! That’s a big spot,” I share, a little embarrassed.

“It’ll be fine,” Joe offers, shifting to get out of the car.

Normally I wouldn’t freak out over something as stupid as a wad of drool I left on someone’s clothing, but this isn’t the first time I’ve done it right before being seen in public, and it’s still uncomfortable with Joe. We’ve actually done it to each other several times. I still am a bit uncomfortable by it, but not Joe.

I notice that we’re just outside a city block that looks like Santa Monica. “Until that wet mark goes, we’re not going into public,” I state sternly.

With a chuckle, Joe instructs Hunter to drive around the block. The two of us use his handkerchief to dab the moisture away. We manage to get rid of most of the moisture, especially when I start blowing on it and then Joe convinces me that the mark can be hidden by his suit jacket when he puts it on.

After lunch, we make our way back to Malibu for a quiet and relaxing afternoon and evening. Joe and I take a swim in the ocean, snuggle on a blanket on the sand with Sadie, take a stroll on the beach and then have a romantic dinner under the stars on the back patio. When it gets dark enough, I make sure all lights are off in the house before returning to Joe on the lounge chair by the pool with a fresh glass of scotch for him.

“What are you doing, beautiful?” Joe inquires when I don’t sit back down.

Not responding right away, I make my way over to the edge of the pool and slide in. Then, I remove my bathing suit top, then bottoms and toss them at Joe. “I’ve never skinny dipped with a guy before . . . a non-gay guy, I should say.”

“I’ve never skinny dipped with a woman before,” Joe replies with a grin as he hurries off the lounger and slips into the water.

“Another first for us,” I comment.

“Indeed,” Joe confirms and then tosses his swimsuit to the ground near where he placed his drink at the edge of the pool.

We play a little game of cat and mouse which only lasts about twenty seconds when Joe corners me.

“You didn’t think that through,” he chuckles.

“No,” I agree.

“I can give you a head start if you’d like?” Joe offers playfully.

My hands curl around his neck and I yank him closer so our bodies touch and our mouths connect. “No,” I return. “I want you.”

“I want you,” Joe replies and then slips is tongue inside my mouth.

I curl my body around him, allowing his hands to explore in all the right places that get me riled up before I use a jiu-jitsu move to break free.

Joe laughs as he turns around in the water searching for me. “So that’s how you want to do this?” he humors.

“What?” I deny.

“You’re gonna get it?” he declares playfully.

“What?” I say, baiting him to chase me. Cupping my hands, I splash water in his direction.

Joe’s body slowly creeps forward in the water as I move backward. Two seconds later, he lunges for me and I yelp while trying to get away. Sadie jumps in, chasing us both as we hop in and out of the water — I jump out several times to prevent myself from being caught. When I surface from diving in, the darkness of the water hides Joe. I call out for him, thinking he got out of the pool. A small scream releases from my throat when I feel something grab my ankle under the water.

“Looks like you caught me,” I announce when Joe pops up from under the water.

“Looks like I did,” he replies. “My little siren.”

“Looks like I might have trapped me a sailor,” I giggle.

“That you have,” he confesses.

“Careful,” I tease. “We’re known to not be good for sailors.”

“I don’t care,” he reveals, taking my mouth with his.

“No?” I check when catching a breath.

“No,” he confirms. “But, I’d say you’re still good for me.”

“Really?”

His lips move to my neck as his hands tighten on my ass after his cock penetrates me.

“Fuck,” I grunt.

“Too bad I can’t spank you in here,” Joe states.

I groan disappointment at the realization.

“I’ll save that for tomorrow . . . or later,” Joe announces.

“Okay,” my voice shakes as I whimper from him pinching one of my nipples.

“God, baby,” Joe huffs. “I love what you do to me.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“What do I do to you?” I ask, curious to see what he says.

“You drive me crazy,” he shares. “Whether I’m with you or not, all I can think about most of the time is being inside you. I can’t get enough . . . like I’m a horny teenager.”

“Mmmm,” I hum. “I like the sound of that.”

“I love the way your pussy wraps around my cock,” he says.

Shivers scatter through my body at his words. “You’ll make me cum talking like that.”

Joe chuckles as he continues to thrust inside me. “Promise?” he checks.

“Yes,” I pant. “Don’t stop.”

“I can’t get enough of you,” Joe states. “Your touch . . . your smell . . . your taste . . . I want it. I need it all the time.”

My throat hums at his words.

“I love you, Emma,” Joe says, holding me tighter to him as if it’ll blur the lines of our physical states and turn us into a single body.

The orgasm begins to surface in my veins and my nails dig into his back.

“That’s it, beautiful,” Joe coaxes. “Cum for me.”

“Yes,” I moan.

“Promise?”

“Yes,” I agree with another pant.

With just a few more pumps of his cock, my orgasm rolls into me like a wave hitting a rocky cliff. My mouth presses against his shoulder, sinking my teeth into his skin to curb the level of sound echoing out of me.

“Joe,” I whimper as my climax reaches its peak.

“Emma,” Joe groan.

We stay connected in the water for several minutes after we’ve finished.

“We should get to bed,” Joe suggests.

“Why?”

“We have to get up early,” he mentions.

“For what?”

“A surprise,” he reveals.

“You know I don’t like surprises . . . and, Valentine’s Day is over,” I remind. “It was yesterday, and today you had a second surprise.”

“You’ll like this one,” Joe encourages. “No more car stuff . . . not for at least a few days.”

“Joseph,” I reply.

He laughs as he carries me over to the steps to get out of the pool. “Come on,” he says.

I’m groaning the instant I realize that I’m being woken up by an alarm. Dazed, I’m disoriented as to where I am. My body launches itself to an upright position.

Sadie moves slowly to greet me, seeming still tired too.

“Good morning, beautiful,” Joe says, kissing my shoulder.

I fall back to the bed and cover my head with the blankets. “It’s still dark out,” I complain.

“I know,” Joe chuckles, trying to peel back the blankets. “Come on. We need to rinse off and get dressed.”

“For what?” I whine.

“For where we’re going,” he says.

“And, where is that?”

“You’ll have to get up to find out,” Joe coaxes.

“What if I don’t want to get up?” I poke.

“Then, I’ll be forced to take extreme measures,” Joe announces.

“Extreme measures?” I ask, looking at him.

“Yes,” Joe laughs.

“What kind of extreme measures?” I prod.

Joe’s fingers tickle my naked ass cheek and then suddenly smack it. “If I recall . . . someone has a few good spanks due for last night.”

“That will just make me horny, not get me out of bed,” I share.

“You sure?” he checks, hitting me again.

“Yes,” I moan, enjoying the tingling feeling that spreads.

Joe shifts his hand, caressing my skin in a very sensual way until he suddenly tickles me.

I scream, shifting as fast as I can to gain a vantage point. “That will just piss me off.”

Joe laughs.

Seeing an opportunity, I send my hand flying and clip the side of Joe’s right butt cheek.

“Watch it, beautiful,” Joe challenges.

“Why? Does it turn you on?” I goad. My hand launches again, but he blocks me.

We wrestle until I’m able to get him good with a smack that sounds loud like it hurts. I can’t help but laugh as we go back and forth several times clipping each other’s rear.

“That’s it,” Joe announces with a grin, throwing me over his shoulder.

“Put me down,” I whine playfully.

“Nope,” Joe denies. “I warned you.”

“What? Are you going to punish me?” I check.

“Yes,” he confirms.

“With what?” I ask as he breaches the doorway to the bathroom.

Joe doesn’t answer. Instead, he pops open the shower door and puts me down, turning the shower head on before I gain my footing.

“Ahhhh!” I yell when the cold water makes contact with my skin. My body springs to get away, but Joe blocks me. “It’s fucking cold!”

Joe laughs, holding me in place with one arm extended as he tries to stay out of the stream.

“You think that’s funny?” I ask.

Joe smiles and laughs more.

“Really?” I check a second before I start splashing him with the cold water.

“Hey,” he shouts while struggling to keep me under and himself at bay.

Joe suddenly reaches with his free arm to change the temperature and then steps into the shower. He presses himself against me to where I’m wedged between him and the wall. “God, you’re so fucking beautiful.” His mouth seizes mine.

“You’re not mad?” I check, giggling at our playfulness.

“God, no,” he confirms. “I love it when you play along like that.”

“Really?”

“Yes,” he confirms, tasting my neck.

“I thought . . .” I gasp as he hoists me up against the wall by my ass, “. . . that we didn’t have much time.”

“I planned to have my way with you before we leave,” he shares.

“Really?” I moan when he slips inside me.

“Yes,” he validates, thrusting deeper.

Our bodies tangle into one until my first orgasm arrives. Before I finish convulsing from the stimulation, Joe lowers me, guiding my body to turn.

A new wave of shivers spread through me, knowing what he’s about to do. “Yes,” I moan in anticipation. “Please, yes.”

“You sure?” Joe checks, teasing my opening with the tip of his penis.

“Yes,” I gulp. “God, yes.”

He glides in easily, reaching into the depths on the very first stroke. “Fuuuuuck,” Joe groans when he’s all the way in. “God, you feel so fucking good.”

“Mmmmmm,” I hum.

Joe’s thrusts become a little less restrained which I happily enjoy. Wanting full penetration and access, I bend more at the waist, resting my hands on the built-in seat for stability. My body becomes more aroused at the increase of roughness, needing more of it. As if reading my mind, Joe’s fingers tighten on my hips as he pumps into me a little harder.

My moans escalate quickly, like a sea storm brewing over the water. “Yes. Fuck, yes.”

Joe’s fingers grip my shoulder, yanking me back into him.

“God,” I cry in ecstasy. “You’re going to make me cum so hard.” My fingers curl into the edges of the tile.

Joe responds only with a slight quickening of his thrusts, pushing a little deeper and harder.

“Yes,” I moan. “Fuck, yes. God, make me cum.” My voice catches in my throat, halting all noises from escaping as the orgasm floods my body. When I’m finally able to let out a breath, my voice cracks, “Fuuuuuuuck.”

Joe stays inside me, pressing my body against the wall as he positions my leg up on the seat while I’m still riding the high of climax. “Stay there, beautiful,” he encourages. His thrusts remain deep and firm, but the emotion behind them has changed. “Stay there . . . right on the edge.”

“Fuuuuuuuck,” I whimper on a large breath in.

“Don’t go yet,” he requests.

My nails dig into the tile. “Fuuuck,” I moan, feeling the orgasm charging toward me again.

Joe’s one arm steadies us as it wraps around my waist. The other caresses up my leg until his fingers find my nub. “Cum, beautiful,” he instructs. “Cum for me. Squeeze down on me and make me cum with you.”

“Fuuuuck, yes,” I groan, so close to release.

“That’s it,” he coaxes.

“Joooooe,” I whine.

“That’s it, baby,” he says. “Say my name as you cum.”

I suck in a large gulp of air. “Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck . . . Jooooooooe.”

“Yes,” Joe grunts. “Yes, Emma. God. I fucking love you.”

My body shakes well after my last orgasm and Joe sweetly holds me tight.

“You good?” he checks after a few more minutes.

“Mmm hmm,” I confirm, still unable to utter a word.

Joe guides me to face him and we keep our bodies sandwiched together. Our hands delicately caress the other’s skin as our lips tangle on occasion.

After our shower, I dress in a dazed stupor, tired from the previous day and this morning’s activities. Thankfully by the time we make it to the kitchen, Anna is already in the house, has fed and taken Sadie out for a run on the beach and is almost done with our breakfast.

“Enjoy,” Anna says, handing Joe a basket before we leave.

It’s still dark when we enter the car, and once again, Joe is blindfolding me. I caution the attempt, sharing the possibility of me falling asleep. Unfortunately, Joe doesn’t mind and welcomes the idea of me resting.

My head jerks up at the sound and feeling of a car door being opened.

“We’re here,” Joe reveals.

“I’m awake,” I announce. “Can I take this thing off?”

“Sure,” Joe says with a smile in his voice.

A nervous grin pops onto my face when I see where we are and what we’re about to do.

“Nervous?” Joe checks.

“A little,” I admit, pulling him to me more as we walk.

“We can do some of the tapping,” Joe mentions.

“No, I’m good,” I offer. “I think I’m more excited than anything.”

“Good,” Joe replies, kissing my temple.

Hunter hands off our bag to Joe when we approach the large, wicker basket that is going to be our elevator to the sky to watch the sunrise. Our hot air balloon instructor is very nice and goes over some details with us before we take off.

Once we’re in the air, I’m surprised as to how quiet and calm the air is — it’s like you could hear everything and nothing all at the same time. Joe stands behind me with the blanket wrapped around us as we gaze at the horizon, watching the colors change as the morning light rises with the sun.

“I love you,” Joe says, kissing me on the back of my head.

There’s a part of me that wishes that I could express myself with words to him.

“Thank you,” I say.

“For what?” Joe checks.

“All of it,” I reply.

“You’re welcome, beautiful,” Joe returns. “You deserve it.”

I pull him closer to my body.

We both drift off pretty quickly in the car on the ride back to the beach house. Once we’ve returned, Joe and I rinse off and change into our bathing suits as we wait for our friends to arrive for some fun in the sun and hang out by the heated pool. It feels like only a matter of seconds from when I close my eyes for a nap that everyone has arrived.

Jimmy and Allen are with us since they’ve come back to visit California, wanting to escape the gloomy, winter weather of the east. Jared, Nathan, Jimmy, Allen and Joe are in the heated pool as I sit at the shallow end with my feet dangling in the water. Sadie bounces back and forth, diving into the water on occasion to play with the guys. Henry is more relaxed and free, goofing around with Maggie in a way I’ve never seen him — he’s always been happy, but today he seems a little freer to be himself. He plays with her like their teenagers in love, joking, teasing, kissing and cuddling. Suddenly, he scoops her up as she playfully screams for help, carrying her to the edge of the pool.

“Henry, don’t you even think about it,” she scolds.

Acting as if he didn’t hear her, Henry leaps into the middle of the pool, submerging both of them.

“You’re in big trouble, mister,” she announces when she surfaces. Maggie giggles, chasing him around in the water.

“Hey, beautiful,” Joe greets, swimming closer to me.

“Hey,” I return, matching the childlike grin on his face. “If you want to get laid tonight, you better not try to do the same thing as Henry . . . or use those three words around our friends.”

“What?” Joe asks, feigning confusion from my threat. He stands, revealing his gloriously tanned, hot body as the water trickles south, back into the pool.

I find myself ogling his body as he walks closer, my legs part, allowing Joe to get closer despite my reservations about being forced into the pool like Maggie. My friends’ playfulness becomes drowned by the hormones coursing through me in response to Joe’s close proximity.

Joe places his hands on either side of my thighs on the concrete, leaning forward for a kiss. “Hey,” he repeats in a cute tone, keeping his lips lingering on my skin.

“Hey,” I breathe out.

My arms curl over Joe’s shoulders, wanting more of him and not caring that my friends could be watching my openness with him.

“You coming in?” Joe asks, keeping his lips against mine.

“Soon,” I answer, pulling him closer.

“Get a room,” Nathan cackles.

“Leave them alone,” Maggie chides. “I think it’s cute. They finally get to be themselves around us.”

“No offense, but it’s a little sickening to see how in
love
Joe is,” Jimmy teases. “Heterosexuals are so weird. You guys maul each other in public like it’s nothing.”

My arms release Joe and my mouth parts nervously from him at Jimmy’s use of the
L
word so casually to describe Joe and me — especially since they don’t know that Joe’s told me that he loves me.

Joe’s fingers curl into the side of my hips, not letting me peel away, scooting me closer to the edge of the pool. His face buries into my neck and I can’t help but giggle at how it tickles. “Ignore them,” he suggests.

“Maybe you should stop complaining and focus on mauling Allen instead,” Jared comments.

“You’re among friends,” Nathan announces. “Maul away.”

Joe shifts me closer. “Come in,” he asks, picking me up before I have the chance to answer.

I don’t fight, just stare at him as we hover above the water.

“Ready?” he inquires.

I nod.

Our bodies descend into the water, warming me from the cool chill that permeated the air.

Ten minutes later, Maggie’s on Henry’s shoulders and Nathan’s on Jared’s while they have a chicken fight. Not much longer, Jimmy is on top of Allen and Joe hoists me up on his. The eight of us play fight for I’m not sure how long — Joe and I win several of the battles.

In the evening, when everyone has gone off to their designated rooms at the beach house since they’re staying the night, Joe and I snuggle on a lounge chair with Sadie on the back patio facing the ocean and night sky as we did the night prior. The air is cool enough for us to cover ourselves with a blanket. Peace and beauty surround us as the only sights we see are the stars above and the gentle hum of the wind.

“Em,” Joe says sweetly.

“Yeah?”

“I just wanted to say how proud of you I am,” he says.

“For what?”

“I’m proud of you and that you were so open to all the plans I made,” he reminds. “I’m really glad you were willing to work with Dr. Callahan.”

“Me too,” I answer, looking up at him.

“I’m serious, beautiful,” Joe adds. “I know it’s not easy to face your fears, especially with your past and that’s why I love you even more.”

“Joe,” I whine a little, still not used to him saying those three little words that mean so much.

“Regardless of if you ever learn to drive, I think that you’ve really opened yourself up to healing . . . moving forward, in a good way, you know?” he says.

“Yeah,” I agree softly.

“I think you’re parents would be proud of you for what you did . . . in fact, I’d bet on it,” he adds.

“Yeah?” I check with a smile, starting to feel a little pride in myself.

“Yes,” he confirms. “Maggie, Jared and Nathan were not just proud but happy for you. Didn’t you see how their faces lit up when we told them?”

“Yeah,” I confirm, remembering how they practically squished me to death. “Thank you.”

“For what, beautiful?”

“For Valentine’s Day. For yesterday. For today. For being you,” I say.

Joe’s boyish grin returns.

“What?” I check, not understanding his expression.

“Nothing,” he chuckles.