Keeper of the Heart (20 page)

Martha was right, of course, but Shanelle had already figured that out for herself. And she was furious with herself for still feeling anything at all for Falon. She’d
known
she shouldn’t be alone with him again. Now she knew why.

“
I
could hold him,” Corth said suddenly, making Shanelle groan.

Martha was more vocal with a snort and a derisive “The warrior wants you gone, peabrain, not participating. And isn’t it time you—”

Shanelle had closed her eyes for only a second in dread, knowing full well that Martha was bound to get Falon angry yet. And that second was all it took for Falon to take the step that brought him closer to the table near them, and smash his fist down on the link unit, destroying it completely.

Shanelle’s eyes snapped open in horror at the sound, knowing what he’d done before she saw it. Pure instinct propelled her at Falon, and she threw her arms around his neck and held onto him tight.

“Martha, don’t—please!” Shanelle pleaded desperately, expecting Falon to disappear at any moment to Stars knew where. “You know mother has dozens of those link units, so no harm was done.”

“Yet,” Falon added ominously. “Where is her heart, woman? What must I do to destroy her?”

Once more Shanelle groaned, this time quite loudly, but she also squeezed his neck a little harder. This was a different type of fear she was in the grips of, and she honestly didn’t understand it. All she knew was that she had to make him understand before Martha lost patience with him and he was gone, never to be seen again.

“You can’t hurt Martha, Falon. She belongs to my mother. She’s also my mother’s best friend. If you hurt her, my mother would be devastated. I couldn’t forgive you for that. My father wouldn’t forgive you either, and my mother would try to kill you. All of that for what? Because she angers you? Martha angers
everyone
sooner or later. That’s just the way she is.”

“So she is another one I cannot be rid of without causing you upset?”

He didn’t sound too angry now, and when his cheek nuzzled hers, she realized why. She was pressed tightly to him and he was very appreciative of that fact. But he wasn’t holding her there. He was proving he meant what he said about not touching her. But she was touching him, and a jolt of pure sexual pleasure went through her so suddenly, she shivered with it. Damn him!
How
could he keep doing that to her when she hated everything about him? But the attraction was still there. She couldn’t deny it. She just wasn’t about to let it get to her again. Besides, joining with him again, no matter how much the idea pulled at her, would only encourage him, making this impossible situation even worse than it already was.

She unwrapped herself from his body to stare at him with what she hoped was an unrevealing expression. His own expression was telling. The man did want her. His light blue eyes fairly blazed with it, and another jolt of pure sexual hunger went through her, more powerful than the last, so powerful she could think of nothing else.

Before she could do something stupid, like give in to that silent entreaty, the audiovisual console in the corner started chiming. Shanelle turned toward it and gave it permission to speak, grateful for the distraction even though she knew full well who was calling.

And sure enough, the console lit up with a view of the Rover’s Control Room, and Martha’s voice blasted out. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t dump him in the middle of a pride of wild
fembairi.”

Shanelle wanted Falon out of her life, not dead. The mere thought of it flustered her so much, all she could answer was, “Because—because... just because.”

“Well, we can’t get more illuminating than that, can we?” Martha came back dryly.

“Couldn’t you just forget about this, Martha? Falon is going to leave now—”

“You’re damn right he is, and
right
now.”

“No!” Shanelle shouted and swung around. But Transferring was instantaneous. Falon was already gone. “Where did you send him?”

“Relax, kiddo,” Martha said, sounding much more like herself now that she’d got even. “He’s back in his own room, where I should have put him before your sleep was disturbed. I can’t have him thinking I won’t follow through on what I promise, can I?”

Shanelle glared furiously at the console, the fright she had just experienced taking refuge in anger. “You didn’t have to play I’m-tougher-than-you-are! You could have left him alone. Dammit, I was in control of the situation for once, so why did you deliberately provoke him?”

If Martha could shrug with blatant unconcern, she’d be doing it now. “Just doing my job.”

It was impossible to argue with a Mock II, so Shanelle turned to further vent her anger in a different direction. “And how come you just sat there the whole time, Corth? Didn’t I tell him to leave? Shouldn’t you have at least made an effort to assist him in going?”

“He had yet to see to your anger, Shani, which only he could do as the cause of it. And when he did, I did not hear you tell him to leave again. Nor did he touch you other than to relieve your pain. It was you who was touching him.”

“When did you start analyzing situations before you act?” she grumbled with less heat.

“Martha has explained to me that sometimes a no does not mean a no after a woman has had her socks knocked off, because there is too much uncertainty in true feelings.”

“Martha!”

“Well, he was asking so farden many questions, what was I supposed to tell him? That you hate the guy’s guts, when that warrior has you practically panting every time you see him? And besides, you don’t really want Corth tangling with him. Your Falon’s pride might not withstand it. Much better if he gets shown up by something he can’t fight against.”

Shanelle hated it when there turned out to be perfect soundness to Martha’s madness. “I’m going back to bed. I don’t even want to think about how angry that warrior is going to be the next time I see him, nor do I want to dwell any longer on how
helpful
you two have been. Maybe you should have sent Falon back to his room before I woke up, because now I just have one more thing to worry about.”

“Well, you don’t expect me to do
everything
right, do you?”

Shanelle nearly choked on that one.

Tedra had no sooner walked into her dressing room the next morning than Martha’s main housing terminal flashed on, and Martha’s voice complained, “It’s disgusting how much time you spend in that bed at your age. Don’t you ever get tired of sharing so much sex with the same man?”

“Uh-oh.” Tedra grinned as she stepped into her solaray bath for the required three-second cleaning, then out again. “Whenever you attack me, old girl, you aren’t happy about something, and it’s usually something
you’ve
done. What is it this time?”

“That was a legitimate complaint, now that I think about it, especially since I’ve been waiting half the night and then some for you to make an appearance. The extra hour you just spent with the big guy really grated on my nerves. I’m amazed I restrained myself from interrupting that little bout of fun.”

“You don’t have nerves, and the last time you interrupted Challen when he didn’t want to be interrupted, you found yourself moved in with Brock, and you hated that enough to mind your manners after that. Besides, can I help it if my barbarian loves me so much he can’t keep his hands off me?”

“You don’t have to like it so much.”

Tedra’s eyes rounded incredulously before she burst into laughter. “We really are having a circuit breakdown this morning, aren’t we? Why don’t you stop going round the block already and tell me what’s really bothering you?” And then she stopped in the middle of slipping into a fresh
chauri.
“Wait a minute. You spent the night with Shani. What have you done now, Martha?”

“What do you mean, what have
I
done?” the computer huffed indignantly. “I analyzed and acted in accordance with your wishes. But when there is more than one option to choose from, I have to wonder if one wouldn’t have been better than another— in the overall scheme of things, at any rate.”

“I don’t think I like the sound of this.
Which
option did you choose that you’re not absolutely thrilled about?”

“See for yourself.”

Tedra sat down warily before the computer’s video port to watch a reenactment of what happened in her daughter’s room last night, half recorded from Martha’s viewer, half simulated by the Rover’s monitoring system when Martha’s sight wasn’t directly on the subjects. Everything was there, from the moment the Ba-Har-ani entered the room until Shani was back in bed and pounding the hell out of her pillow before she fell back into a fitful sleep.

When the video port went blank, Tedra said with more than a little bemusement, “I’ve never seen her that angry with anyone before, nor that protective.”

“Sexual emotions aren’t easy to deal with when they’re new. You ought to know that, or has it been too long for you to remember?”

Tedra made a face. “Real cute. And I see you were right as usual, Martha. She does still want him. It was written all over her face, even if she did turn him down.”

“Yes, but she did say no. Right now she honestly believes she won’t be happy with a warrior, so for the time being, it’s a no-win situation. But I
could
have kept my mouth shut last night and given that warrior an opportunity to rid your daughter of one of her fears concerning him.”

Tedra didn’t have to ask which one. “Do you think he could have?”

“He was determined enough. Of course, how he would have acquitted himself if he had given free rein to that desire he was in the grips of is another story. He failed once, and probables says he hasn’t yet had enough time to learn how to fully control what Shani makes him feel. He’s making the effort. You saw for yourself how he restrained himself from even touching her when he was so highly charged. It was a wonder my circuits weren’t melted just being in the same vicinity.”

“That’s
not
what I need to hear, Martha,” Tedra grumbled.

“Sure it is, since it supports the fact that anyone who can get that charged with emotion is bound to have the one emotion Shani wants above all else. No one can tell me that particular Sha-Ka’ani male isn’t going to love your daughter to pieces if he gets the chance to. As far as I’m concerned, that isn’t an issue.”

Tedra was inclined to agree. She’d always maintained that all warriors had the capacity to love. You just had to figure out how to get them to admit it, since they considered it an unwarriorlike emotion. But the Ba-Har-ani weren’t like Kan-is-Tran warriors at all when it came to emotions
and
controlling them, so Martha was undoubtedly right on this point, too. Still...

“Those aren’t Shani’s only objections to a warrior, Martha. What about her unreasonable fear of a warrior’s punishment?”

“She feared Kan-is-Tran punishment.”

“And was outraged by the Ba-Har-ani equivalent, but that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t fear it. You know how silly she gets over pain.”

“Give me a break, doll. You’re talking about a child’s punishment. How painful can that be? It’s the humiliation an adult would feel in getting spanked that is the real punishment, not a temporary hot seat.”

Tedra grinned, remembering the time she’d got spanked herself, and she’d
asked
for it. But she also recalled that it hadn’t been at all painful.

“All right,” she conceded. “So maybe that isn’t a problem that even needs consideration, though I doubt Shani will see it that way.” Then she sighed. “Stars, I wish I could make up my mind about this man and stick to it.”

“You already have. So has Shani, for that matter. You’re just both disappointed that the poor guy isn’t as perfect as Challen.”

“Don’t make me laugh.” Tedra snorted. “Challen perfect? Since when?”

Martha chuckled. “Just because he still drives you up a wall occasionally with a few of his barbarian tendencies doesn’t mean you don’t think he’s the next best thing to ambrosia. You wanted him from the first moment you saw him. You just weren’t planning on keeping him then. Your daughter, on the other hand, wanted the Ba-Har-ani from the start and
was
planning on keeping him. He’s die one who blew it by not getting her hooked with their first joining. And that’s his only true fault here. Everything else can be worked out. You even said so yourself.”

“That was before I knew he was a farden slaveholder,” Tedra reminded her.

“Slaves can be sold, can’t they?”

“What if he won’t?”

“He will if Challen makes it a stipulation to acquiring his daughter.”

After a short silence Tedra suddenly grinned. “And to think I sometimes wonder why I keep you around.” Martha merely made a rude-sounding noise at that, but Tedra had a new question, one Shani probably didn’t know the answer to herself. “We’ve established she still wants him whether she’ll admit it or not, but does she love him yet?”

“What am I, a mind reader?”

“You’re an expert in deductions and probables, as you so frequently remind me and anyone else who’ll listen, which amounts to the same thing, so give—or am I going to hate the answer?”

“If you were hoping she’d be all starry-eyed already just because she’s hot for the guy, you can forget it. She might be fainthearted in certain areas, but she’s strong-willed in others, and the plain fact is she won’t
let
herself love the Ba-Har-ani as long as she thinks she’s going to avoid belonging to him. So it’s not going to happen until she does belong to him and has no reason to fight it anymore.”