Lily in Bloom (17 page)

“Shouldn't we stay here then? Won't they give up after a while?” Lily asked.

“We risk you being exposed and then being trapped here. It is better to leave while we have the advantage.” Tom put one arm around her. “Try not to be too mad at James. I think deep down he feels guilty for pushing marriage on you. He's blaming Eric outwardly but inside blaming himself.”

Lily snorted but didn’t respond. After a few moments, she asked, “What do you know about Eric and Caitlin?”

Tom hesitated but seemed to make up his mind to continue. “I know Caitlin had other lovers.”

Lily gasped. This is not at all what she had expected to hear.

Tom sighed. “It is also rumored that she and Eric quarreled the night of her death. She died in a carriage accident and some say the carriage was tampered with.”

Lily was stunned. She had always assumed that it was Eric's love of Caitlin that had held him back but could he be suffering from more than a lost love? Was he responsible? Kathryn had made it sound like he was but Lily didn't trust Kathryn to tell any truth that wasn't to her advantage. Clearly, Kathryn was on the Colonel's side.

“Do you really think Eric was responsible for her death?” Lily asked, biting her lip.

“Lily, I like Eric a great deal but don't block out important information because of your feelings. This is your life we are talking about and it's important you have all of the facts.” Tom gave her a squeeze to emphasize his point.

Lily knew that he was right but it was hard to separate her feelings from her judgment.

At just after midnight, the four of them struck out. They didn't even check out of the hotel. They left a note with payment for the innkeeper. Lily was disappointed she was still traveling in men's clothing but she let it go. Judging by the tension when she had asked, James and Eric had disagreed over that as well. When they reached the outskirts of town, she saw a wagon waiting on the side of the road. Fear bubbled inside her but James approached easily.

“Mrs. Madison, thank you for meeting us at this late hour. I trust you had no trouble getting here?” James smiled cordially.

“No, I didn't. Thank you for asking. I would ask why we are leaving at this hour but I am sure that you will not tell me,” Mrs. Madison stated matter-of-factly.

“Ann Madison, these are my brothers, Tom and Billy, and our friend Eric,” Lily almost jumped out of her skin. She was to pose as a boy all the way to Portland? It was one thing to do it for a few minutes but for several days? White hot fury swept through her as she realized why. She would not be able to so much as touch Eric, nor he her, if she were posing as a male. She could have chewed nails and spit them and the look she shot James said as much but he only smiled angelically.

Tom took over driving the wagon and Ann rode next to him. Lily looked over at the woman they were traveling with. Even in the dark it was obvious that Ann was a young woman and quite pretty. She had dark hair and eyes and her features were quite refined.

Lily wanted to ask why a lone woman would agree to travel with a group of unknown men but she couldn't find an opportunity to ask. She had her own horse, obviously a boy of her age would not ride with another man. She felt herself growing angry again and she was afraid Ann would hear her voice and know that they were lying. She supposed that James might just be trying to protect her but she was fairly certain he was just trying to keep her and Eric apart.

She felt herself growing more and more tired and Ann eventually went to lie down in the back of the wagon, though she couldn't have slept much. Lily knew Ann was perfectly safe but it must be very strange to be traveling with a group of unknown men. She knew the feeling well. She wished she could lie down, or at least snuggle against Eric. She cursed James again but continued to ride.

At about sunrise she started to fall asleep in the saddle. She woke herself up the first few times but then she felt herself slumping over. She closed her eyes for just a second and fell soundly asleep.

“Billy, Billy, wake up,” she heard Eric's voice through a fog. She was still on her horse, her head resting against his neck.

“Sorry,” she croaked, rousing herself. Eric rode over to James and she could hear the two of them whispering to each other in short bursts but she could not understand what they were saying.

James rode over to the wagon. Ann, poked her head as they came to a stop. “I am sorry, Mrs. Madison, but my youngest brother is suffering from exhaustion. Would you mind riding next to Tom while Billy lies down for a bit?”

Ann nodded her head. Lily climbed into the back and fell asleep before she even realized the wagon had resumed moving.

She woke a few hours later, hungry and still tired. They stopped and made a brief meal, although more elaborate than hardtack, and then packed up, with Ann in the back of the wagon again.

The sun was rising behind her and she realized that they were heading west instead of south. Perhaps they were trying to throw her kidnappers off their tracks? She had to admit, it seemed like a pretty good plan. Wouldn't it look better though, if she were also a woman?

“James,” Lily rode up next to her brother, “why am I dressed as a male?”

“To protect you, of course. Keep your voice down. You wouldn't want wake Mrs. Madison.” James smiled, clearly pleased with himself.

Lily gave him a withering look. “But all of my kidnappers recognized me as a male. They would be less likely to recognize me as a female.”

“Lily, no man that sees you as a woman is going to forget you. But as a male, change your hat and apparently they can sit next to you in a tavern and not know who you are.” James was enjoying himself.

“You realize you are endangering Mrs. Madison. They could mistake her for me,” Lily shot back, exasperated.

He nodded, “An unfortunate possibility, but I don't think it will happen.”

“How could you be so callous?” She fell back in her spot between James and Eric, not waiting for a response. Eric kicked his horse up slightly and leaned over to whisper in her ear.

“He's right about one thing,” he said with a grin. “No man is ever going to forget once they have seen you.”

Lily stared hard at her brother's back. This was not over.

They continued most of the day, their trail finally arcing south near sunset. They stopped and had dinner, a nice meal, and Lily was thankful they had a wagon that could carry provisions. The horses were tended and then James lay out the bedrolls. She was between her brothers, while Eric kept watch. Ann was, of course, in the wagon. Lily was exhausted after a long day and night of riding but she couldn't seem to fall asleep. She ached to be in Eric's arms. Now that she was back with him, polite rules of decorum interested her little. After what she had been through, it seemed more important that she be near him. They would be married soon and she didn't see why that precluded her from all physical contact. She just wanted to feel safe.

Lily finally fell asleep late into the night but her dreams were restless and all night she dreamed of being kidnapped, or that she was separated from Eric and she couldn't find him no matter how hard she looked. Toward dawn, she began to have a dream that she was alone in the woods. She could hear Slim's voice calling to her. She tried to run but the more she ran the closer he seemed to get. His voice was right in her ear. “I'm a comin' for ya, girlie,” he cackled.

Lily woke in a cold sweat and sat up. She felt so alone and afraid. She couldn't even talk about how she was feeling for fear of being discovered. After a night of rest, Ann would not be retiring to the wagon today. She was forced into silence.

The day seemed to drag on, even more so because she was exhausted. She craved sleep but when the time came to actually fall asleep she again had difficulty and was plagued by nightmares. By the next day, Lily could feel her shoulders slumped with exhaustion but she was too tired to do anything about it. She also noticed Tom, Eric, and James whispering and looking at her with concern but she didn't know what they were saying and couldn't bring herself to muster the strength to ask. When they broke for camp, Ann and Tom went to gather firewood.

Eric immediately wrapped his arms around her and she slumped against him. Her eyes closed of their own accord.

James started to protest but Eric gave him a sharp look and growled, “Not now, James.”

James was silent and Lily was thankful for the warmth of his embrace even for a few minutes.

Finally, James spoke. His voice was the gentlest it had been in days. “Lily, what is wrong?”

“Can't sleep,” she mumbled, “nightmares.”

“James, we can't let this continue. She looks like the walking dead.” Eric gave her a small squeeze.

“What choice do we have? We have to continue, we have to get her to safety.”  James paused. “We could say she is sick and let her sleep in the wagon.”

Eric thought for a second. “Then what would we do with Ann? Where would she sleep at night? She might also try to tend to Lily and that could get...complicated.”

James nodded and Lily thought it was nice to hear them speaking cordially.

“James, could Eric sleep next to me?” Lily asked.

“Lily,” James started to protest.

“Please James, you'll be right on the other side of me and then, if I need to, I can hold his hand in the night when Slim comes to get me.” She paused, “I mean in my dream. He comes to get me in my dream.” She was already falling asleep in the warmth of Eric's arms.

James nodded his head, concern seeming to override his desire to keep them apart.

“Sweetheart, you've got to wake up and have dinner. Then you can go to sleep.” Lily roused herself as the meal was prepared. She shoved down what she could then lay down on the bedroll. She was already falling asleep and knowing that Eric would be next to her helped her start to drift off. She heard Ann, however, ask a few questions about her.

“Is Billy all right? That boy looked tired all day. He isn't getting sick is he?”

“I hope not,” Eric replied but Lily could hear the concern in his voice.

The next morning, Lily woke feeling better and realized she was holding Eric's hand in her sleep. No wonder she had slept well. She heard someone stir and saw Ann coming back from the woods. Hopefully, the woman had not noticed that Lily was grasping Eric's hand.

She quickly placed her hat over her bandana that held back her hair. It was braided and tucked into the wrap that bound her breasts. It was extremely uncomfortable but she could do little about it other than cut her hair and that was not going to happen.

“Good morning,” Lily nodded to Ann, using her best male voice. Ann looked surprised and Lily realized that she had not spoken to Ann the entire trip.

Ann smiled and returned the greeting then began building up the fire. Everyone in the camp began to stir and shortly after, they hit the trail again. James insisted that Lily ride on the seat of the wagon with Tom and Ann for a few hours. While it was a welcome change to not have to sit in the saddle, Lily was nervous because it meant a lot of potential conversation with Ann. She didn't know how long she could fake being male.

As the group set out, Ann remained silent. It was early and most everyone was still tired. But as the morning heated up, so did the conversation.

Ann looked over at Lily. “How are you feeling this morning?”

“Better, thank you.” Lily didn't want to say too much.

Ann looked disappointed so Lily decided it would be all right to ask the other woman some questions. If she herself kept quiet, she wouldn't give too much away. “What brings you on this trip?”

Ann frowned slightly. “My husband and I were planning on settling down near Bucksport but he...” Ann hesitated then spoke again, “He passed away.”

“Oh, I am so sorry,” Lily's brow furrowed. “You poor thing!”

Ann looked at her in surprise. “Thank you. It has been very difficult.” Ann put down her head and Tom gave her the eye over Ann's bonnet. Lily realized that she had reacted far more like a woman than a man. She bit her lip. This was not going well.

By noon, everyone was hot and exhausted. The wagon bumped over several rocks and made a sickening crack. Tom pulled the wagon over next to a river and got down to take a look. James and Eric dismounted to join him.

Ann looked over at her. “I may as well make us some lunch. Who knows how long this will take to fix.”

Lily nodded then realized that she should have joined the men. It would seem awkward now and she couldn't help Ann. She considered wading in the water but knew James would not approve. She smiled to think how like her father James had become. She climbed down of the seat and sat silently on the river bank when she heard a noise coming down the trail. It started as a low rumble, and grew steadily louder. She felt her insides clench. Lily looked over at the three men checking the wagon wheel but they had stopped. They too were watching the trail. Quickly, Lily got up and crouched down next to Eric, wanting to be near him as the hooves of approaching horses echoed the pounding of her heart.

A group of about ten uniformed men stopped just in front of the wagon where Ann was partitioning out a small meal. Not knowing that they might be in danger of uniformed men, she smiled easily and asked if she could help them, as Tom stepped up next to her.

An officer stepped forward. “We are looking for some travelers, perhaps you have seen them?” He smiled, clearly inspecting Ann.

It was Tom who responded. “We’re happy to be of service. I'm Tom Mitchell, and this is my wife Ann.”

“Major Cleary. May I ask who you are traveling with?”

Lily was surprised that Ann did not even blink when Tom announced that she was his wife. This must have been part of the original plan. Lil y wondered what circumstances had caused Ann to go along with this charade.

Tom smiled at the Major. “Of course, my brother Jim is gathering some firewood. My brothers Billy and Sam are fixing the wagon wheel.”

Eric whispered, “Keep your hat low and tip it slightly, say nothing.” Lily nodded, he did not have to tell her twice.