Lost (5 page)

  A half hour later, Steven showered quickly and left my apartment for his own.  He loved my nice apartment and hated his crappy one a few blocks away in a different part of town.  So before he left, we talked about him moving into this part of town when his lease was up in 2 months.  I even promised to keep an eye out for a vacancy in my building, though the chances were pretty slim. 
  The people who lived in my cool walk-up were lifers.  The only reason my unit even became available was because the older woman who lived there for 18 years met an older man and they moved in together.  Otherwise, most people in our cool 8 unit building had been there for years because everyone knew what a gem the building was.

CHAPTER 6

   Saturday night I worked my shift at the restaurant, and returned home by 2:45 after staying to have drinks with Denise and a few of my friends after work.  I stayed late and we broke every rule; from drinking after hours, to pouring from the bottles unmeasured.  Drinking together, Denise wanted to know all about my new job, and she was a doll about me leaving her for only one shift a weekend.
  In my tipsy state, I told Denise and the girls about my new job, then I spilled about the Peter thing.  I told them what he had done, and why I thought he was a freak, but just like Steven they didn't agree with me. 
  Arguments were made about why I should chill the hell out, and why I should just screw Peter for his efforts.  Denise whined about her fiancé Martin never buying her flowers again after their engagement and Cori whined about never once receiving flowers from her own boyfriend, ever, which I found sad.
  Basically, I was told to meet Peter with Steven secretly watching, enjoy the attention, see what he was really like and maybe even get laid for the first time in months after leaving Joseph.  When they were through lecturing me on what I should wear for my date, we had one final shot as I laughed at my horny friends, and I finally took a taxi home.
  Crashing by 3:15am, I was absolutely exhausted from my weekend.  I rarely got drunk, because I found drunk women to be fairly obnoxious, and I rarely drank to excess, but I had twice in one weekend.  So I had pretty much met my partying quota for the coming 6 months.
  Finally, when I crawled into bed still drunk I couldn’t help but think of Peter.  Slowly, through all the conversations with the girls and with Steven earlier, I allowed myself to open up to the possibility of Peter.  I stopped the decision of
never going to happen,
instead deciding on a
we’ll see what happens
mentality.  I figured the worst that could happen was I didn’t like him at lunch and I left with a friendly acceptance that he wasn’t for me.

                                              *****

   When I was ready just before I left, I called Steven to cancel his secret chaperoning since I felt fairly safe at the pub in the daytime.  Plus, I didn’t think I could keep a straight face if I knew my brother was watching us.  And I
really
didn’t think Steven would behave during the lunch, which would probably make me laugh throughout like I was insane.

  So walking to Murphy's at 11:45 alone, I was freezing cold but excited.  I found myself almost anxious to get the lunch over with so I could put it behind me once and for all.  I wanted to know one way or the other how it was going to go, because I had thought about it to death. 

  Opening the pub doors, my slightly hung over brain was quickly assaulted with sound as I tried to adjust to the sudden darkness inside which replaced the snow covered brightness from outside.  Taking in the room, I spotted Peter immediately when he stood up from a corner booth to greet me with a warm smile.
   “Sophie... You look beautiful,” he said immediately as I approached.
  “Thank you,” I smiled as I removed my black leather coat and red mittens and scarf. 

  Hanging everything on the hook to the side of the booth, I knew Peter got an awesome ass shot which I was okay with because I had dressed casually, but to impress.  I wore my knee high black leather boots, skin tight dark jeans and a loose, low neck red sweater.  I knew I looked good, without looking like I was trying too hard to look good.
  Taking him in when I sat down, neither of us spoke immediately which was awkward, but not overly so.  It was like we each knew we were checking the other out casually, but blatantly. 

  Looking at Peter, I realized he was better looking than I had originally thought.  He was a little plain looking, but taking him in as he looked back at me silently, I found myself strangely attracted to his plain features.  He had lovely blue eyes, brown hair, full lips and pale skin.  He looked very average, but he hand an aura around him that seemed anything but.
  Wearing a black pageboy cap, and a green bomber type jacket, Peter didn't look like he was trying too hard to impress me either, which strangely relaxed me further.
  “Thank you for all the roses this week, but you really shouldn't have.  It was a little much, though I appreciated it,” I said to break the silence between us.
  “It was my pleasure.  I just wish I could’ve seen your face when you received them, especially on Friday when they were late,” he grinned. “Did you think I had forgotten to send them, or that I had given up already?”
  Smiling, I nodded. “Yes, I figured you’d given up the chase quickly, and yes I was thrilled when they finally arrived at 4:00.  How did you get my home address to send the flowers yesterday?” I asked figuring it was best to get the creepy question out of the way before continuing.

  “I saw you leaving Drinks Friday night with someone, so I made sure you were safe when I saw you and him stumbling down the street together.  I didn't know which apartment was yours though until I walked in after you and saw S. Morley on the 2nd unit nameplate.  I guessed you were S. Morley but that's why I wrote Sophie on the envelope, in case I was wrong so one of your neighbors would pass along the flowers to you.”
  “How do you know I wasn't walking to my boyfriend’s place?” I asked testing him.
  “I didn't.  But you didn't call me again all week to tell me to stop because you had a boyfriend, so I assumed it was safe,” he said smiling.
  “How did you see me at Drinks?  We're you following me?” I asked a little aggressively with my elbows on the table trying to read his face.
  “Nope.  I was across the street at O'Sheys with my sister who was having a smoke outside when I spotted you.  It was a complete coincidence, I promise.  Plus, I'm not really a stalker,” he said leaning back against the booth casually while motioning for the waitress.
  Looking at Peter casually moving on from my questions made me realize I believed him.  His answers made sense because O'Sheys
was
right across the street, and it was always packed on Friday nights, but I still needed more.
  “Okay, so why am I here?”
  When Peter paused for a moment and looked at me kind of sadly after my question, I was truly uncomfortable with the way I felt.  I didn’t like the sad look aimed at me and I certainly didn’t like the feeling of being inspected by Peter. 

  “So we can talk, eat lunch, and maybe get to know each other better.” Again he was answering so casually he put me at ease
and
he made me feel a little bitchy.
  “Why me?”
  “Why not you?” He countered, and I was stumped.
  I wanted to say a variety of answers that sounded a little pathetic, which I wasn’t.  I wanted to remind him he thought I was a poser at the health food store, and I wanted to say because we had met twice, and he was acting weird with all the flowers and the notebook.  I didn't know what I wanted to say, but his straightforwardness was causing me to lose my edge around him.
 

  “I don't know why not.  You just seem a little forward or something.”
  Exhaling, Peter almost took my hand but stopped just short to awkwardly hold a napkin on the table instead.

  “Well, I knew I had unintentionally offended you the first time we spoke.  And if you hadn't been leaving Sunshine and Life I would’ve had time to stop back in to show you I wasn't an asshole until I could ask you out to lunch.  But since you were leaving I thought I'd send you flowers instead, which obviously worked because you're here,” Peter answered without sounding arrogant at all.
  Seconds later, the waitress arrived and I ordered a coffee before Peter ordered a BLT.  After pushing me to have something to eat, he finally stopped when I insisted on just coffee, adding I wasn’t hungry which was another lie.  I was starving after my night drinking, but I didn’t want to commit to a set amount of time with Peter.  I felt like I needed the easy escape of just coffee between us.
  Smiling, as he waited for the waitress to leave, Peter totally surprised me by asking, “How was work?”
  “Awesome,” I replied honestly.  “I have a lot to learn, but I think I'm going to love it.  And it's exactly what I want and what I went to school for, so I feel good about it,” I answered quickly.
  “And the people?”
  “They were great, why?”
  “Just curious.  I want to know about you,” he answered calmly again.
  “Well, I'm fairly private, so why don't you tell me about you,” I countered as my coffee was placed in front of me.
  “Okay...” He grinned at my deflection.  “I’m 31.  I have 2 parents still together, and I have 2 sisters, both older and married with families of their own.  I work for a steel company sending out reusable metals to smaller companies to utilize and recycle.  And I'm single.  I've never been married, though I came close once.  Well, close in that we were engaged, not close in terms of an actual wedding date. I draw in my spare time and I have a huge herb garden in my backyard which I use to make my own herbal soaps, detergents, hand lotions and hand cleansers, but I turn my backyard into a closed greenhouse all winter.  I own my own home which I struggled to pay for each month when I bought it at 23, but I don't struggle with the mortgage any longer.  And I drive a pink car,” and when I suddenly smiled he continued.  “Yes, pink.  I got it for a bargain from my sister, and couldn’t refuse it even though the color is a bit much.  I tend to walk everywhere however, so I rarely drive it.”

  Then after a moment of pause, Peter finished with, “And I'm fairly relaxed overall.  Good?” He asked smiling while leaning back against the booth waiting for me to digest his information.
  Staring at Peter in silence, I was starting to really like him the longer he spoke. 
  “Why did your engagement end?  Who ended it?” I practically whispered.
  “
That's
what you question?” He smirked. “Okay.  Patricia and I were together for a few years, 20 to 23, and we were engaged by 22.  We were just so awesome together that we didn't realize we were no longer a young couple in love.  Somehow we had become best friends who finished each other's sentences but there was no spark between us.  We held hands out of habit
not
because we wanted to hold each other.  So Patricia brought up our fading relationship first before I had the balls to do it, and I agreed with her totally.  After our talk we tried harder, almost forcing intimacy that wasn't really there.  We tried with sex, and little gestures, and overall communication, but 6 months later sitting at the dinner table of her parents’ house we started talking about it again and realized nothing had changed or felt better.  We were a cliché.  We loved each other but weren't in love anymore,” he smiled sadly.
  “So that night, right at the kitchen table, we figured out how we could break up without freaking anyone out.  And we were okay, though admittedly I cried once and she cried a few times, but overall we were okay with breaking up.  When we told our families, her parents understood, and my parents were sad but understood.  After that night we just ended everything until the phone calls slowly stopped and we stopped seeing each other over time completely.  But we really were fine somehow.”

  Nodding my head silently, I waited so he would continue past my silence, desperately wanting to hear the rest of his story.
  “A few months later Patricia saw me with another woman and she was jealous, so she called me and we had a good long talk.  But it turned out she was more insecure than jealous.  She was still single and hated that I might have moved on quicker than she did, which made her think she must have lacked something I had needed, hence her insecurity.  So we talked, I reaffirmed how amazing she was and we moved on again.  And that's what we did for 3 years.  We called each other every few months, checked in, made sure everything was okay, then we hung up for another few months.  And 2 years ago Patricia called me and told me she was getting married and I was invited to her wedding which I went to with a date and we were good again,” he smiled.