Authors: Carrie Stone
Tags: #Contemporary Fiction, #Contemporary Women, #Contemporary, #Romance, #Literature & Fiction, #Women's Fiction
Aidan nodded in agreement.
“Very true. So tell me Miss London, what brings a Brit like yourself to the Big smoke?”
Felicity’s smiled faded.
If only she knew the answer to his question.
Chapter Ten
Bill rolled over onto his side, allowing the duvet to slip away from his body. Glenda discreetly admired his toned physique. For a man of fifty seven, he certainly kept himself well. His muscular legs could belong to somebody half his age. Carefully fishing under the duvet to readjust her negligee, Glenda considered how lucky she was to have found someone so kind.
She hadn’t imagined a man could make her feel so good, especially as she’d given up all hope of finding love again. And yet her
e she was, behaving like a love-sick teenager for the past two weeks. Bill had lit a fire in her that she had thought had burned out long ago.
“
I was thinking we could try that new Thai restaurant later on the Roman Road?” Bill said from the edge of the bed as he rolled black socks onto his feet.
“
That would be lovely. I’ve never tried Thai food” Glenda replied getting out of the bed.
Bill stopped what he was doing to glance at her in surprise.
“
Really? Well I reckon you’ll love it. I’ll book us a table for eight o’clock.”
Glenda smiled
self-consciously at him, aware that her negligee was transparent in the light of day.
Making her way quickly into the bathroom, she was relieved to see her new tinted moisturiser had made a slight difference to her palid make
-up free complexion. At least she didn’t look her usual deathly self, first thing in the morning. It had taken reading all of Fee’s old fashion magazines and going through her daughter’s extensive beauty collection to find a few ways to enhance herself.
She was a fifty-three-year-
old woman with sagging skin, bat wings, copious cellulite and droopy boobs. What Bill saw in her was beyond her comprehension. The last time she’d had sex had been eleven years previous when her body had been tighter and she didn’t have to care so much about the jiggle of her extra rolls. Sex at fifty-three was a whole new experience - one she preferred to encounter with the lights firmly out. It didn’t help that Bill’s body still looked attractive. She didn’t want him seeing hers and being turned off.
Stepping into the shower, she thought of Felicity. Aside from a few phone calls and an email, she hadn’t had much contact with her daughter but she wasn’t worried. It seemed Fee’s new friend Aidan was helping her to settle into Sydney well enough. The photo that Fee had sent accompanying her email had almost knocked her for six. Aidan was another James. Studying the image of Fee with a beer bottle in her hand and a smile on her face had been reassurin
g. She looked happy and relaxed, but just looking at her body language towards Aidan told Glenda all she needed to know. Fee wasn’t interested. Undoubtedly it had something to do with his current unemployment. Glenda knew her daughter well and she could hardly use the excuse that he wasn’t her ‘type’ physically.
“
Glen, I’m shooting off to work. I’ll give you a call later” Bill called out from the hallway.
Turning off the shower and reaching for a fresh towel, Glenda wrapped it around her and quickly opened the bathroom door.
“Ok – bye, love. Speak to you later” she replied, patting her face dry.
Hearing the street door close, she walked into her bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed
, wondering what on earth she would wear to the Thai restaurant later in the evening. She’d already exhausted the ‘going out’ section of her wardrobe, probably because it only consisted of three dresses bought years previously and one pair of silky black trousers.
Bill had wined and dined her more times in the last fourteen days than she’d experienced in the
past decade. His generosity was astounding; no man had ever made her feel so special and worthwhile. The way he spoke to her and listened to her views and opinions made her feel not only interesting, but valued. She wanted to share her excitement and news with Felicity, but something was holding her back. Martin.
Swallowing a lump in her throat, Glenda thought of Fee’s father Martin.
The three of them had been such a tight unit and despite not having much money, Glenda had adored him. They’d met in their early teens and were married within a year. He had been her world and he was the man that had given her Fee, her greatest joy in life.
His unexpected death when Felicity was just eleven years old had been a devastating blow to all of them. The doctors had said that the impact from the oncoming lorry had been so severe that he would have died instantly. That at least had given Glenda a small comfort. Yet, both her life and Fee’s had changed forever from that day. She sometimes wondered if it affected her daughter more than she let on. Fee never mentioned his name and rarely spoke of her childhood. Glenda understood that it held too many painful memories. Martin may not have been around, but she still held him dearly in her heart.
The annual ritual of lighting a candle for him was still upheld and it was the only time that she saw Felicity with tears in her eyes and lost in memories. If only he had been around to see their daughter now. He would have been so proud.
A shrill from the telephone broke into her thoughts. She jumped up and walked across the bedroom to answer.
“Hello.”
“
Hi Glenda, it’s Zara.”
“
Hello love, how are you?” she asked, holding the receiver a little way from her ear as the children screamed loudly in the background.
“
I’m in a state actually. Steve’s had to go away on an overnight business trip and I’m alone with the kids. I wouldn’t have minded but Daisy has a bug and now both Lexi and Abbey are looking peaky also.” Zara’s voice took on a high pitched, rushed tone. She sounded close to tears.
“
Oh you poor love, you sound in a pickle. Do you want me to come over and give you a hand?”
“
Glenda you are a life saver. I didn’t know who else to turn to.” Zara sniffled and Glenda cut in quickly.
“
Now, now, no tears. I need to get ready and I’ll come straight over. Give me twenty minutes, ok?”
Putting down the phone, Glenda rushed to get ready. Without Fee, Glenda knew Zara was likely at a loss for close female company. In the twenty odd years that she’d known her daughter’s friend, she’d come to realise that although she was overly social and kind natured, she didn’t have many people she could call upon. As an only child estranged from her foster parents, it meant that Steve and the children were all she really had. It tugged at Glenda’s heartstrings whenever she heard Zara in distress. The girl had come to be like a second daughter to her.
Despite Daisy’s high
-pitched teary tantrum, Zara heard the doorbell and hurried to answer it.
Glenda stood on her doorstep with a striped shopper carrier
bag looking surprisingly fresh-faced and happy considering the hour of day.
“
Morning, love.”
Zara moved aside allowing Glenda to pass her into the hallway.
“Morning, thanks so much for coming” she replied bending down to disentangle Daisy’s grip from her legs.
Glenda looked down at Daisy’s small, red puffy face and immediately reached out her arms.
“
Come here, darling. You don’t feel well, huh?” Zara watched as Daisy’s face lit up with a sad smile and she toddled into Glenda’s embrace.
“
First time she’s smiled all morning! Lexi and Abbey are both asleep thank goodness. I gave them some medicine just to be on the safe side.”
Carrying Daisy into the kitchen, Glenda led the way.
“
I stopped at the corner shop and bought Lucozade, rice and apples. Best thing for upset tummies. I also got us some biscuits and some sweets for when the girls are better.” Glenda said unloading the shopping bag single-handed.
Zara switched on the kettle, observing Glenda discreetly. She looked different somehow, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.
“Thanks. That’s great.”
Taking a seat at the kitchen table, Glenda caught Zara’s eye and pointed silently at Daisy’s dead weight in her arms. Zara shook her head in amazement at the sight of her daughter’s sleeping body.
“How did you do that?” she whispered quietly. Being up for the last four hours had undoubtedly taken its toll on Daisy, not to mention herself. She looked longingly at her sleeping child, wishing she could do the same.
“
She’s just exhausted herself, that’s all. I’ll pop her upstairs while you make the tea” Glenda replied, standing up carefully so as not to wake her.
Busying herself with preparing breakfast and
making tea, Zara savoured the few minutes of silence in the house. A sense of foreboding surfaced as Steve flashed into her mind unexpectedly. She stopped midway through buttering the toast and swallowed back tears.
In the ten years she’d been with Steve, he’d never once had to take a business trip and certainly never an overnight one. His job as a contracted builder didn’t justify having to undertake business trips. It hadn’t helped that he’d discreetly packed cloth
es more suited to going out than working. She had noticed his blue check shirt, reserved for dinner dates and special occasions, was nowhere to be seen in his wardrobe.
“
That’s better, a bit of peace and quiet for you before they wake up again” Glenda said, walking into the kitchen and opening the venetian blind a little wider.
Quickly composing herself, Zara turned around with a forced smile on her face.
“It’s lovely to have a bit of silence and adult company, actually. I hope I didn’t drag you away from any important plans today?” Zara asked, suddenly conscious that she may have taken advantage of Glenda’s good nature.
Glenda felt her face flush slightly. As much as she was close to Zara and they shared almost everything, she didn’t feel ready to share her new relationship with Bill just yet. Especially as her own daughter didn’t even know.
“No, you know me – there’s always something I could be doing but nothing urgent that needs me at this hour.” Except perhaps Bill’s body, Glenda thought to herself.
Zara noticed Glenda’s slightly reddened cheeks but decided against pressing the matter. There was definitely something odd about her flushed appearance. She was much calmer and more relaxed than the usual Glenda that she knew.
“Are you still on your anxiety medication Glen?” Zara asked suddenly, realising that was the likely cause of her friend’s new demeanour - a change in medication.
Glenda looked at Zara dumbfounded as it dawned on her that she hadn’t remembered to take her pills in the last week. Come to think of it, she hadn’t experienced any of her usual symptoms and she’d never felt as good as she was feeling lately. She supressed an excited giggle. Love - the miracle cure for everything.
“You’re smiling at me oddly” Zara said amused as she watched Glenda’s eyes light up.
“
Am I? Well it’s probably because I’ve just realised that I haven’t taken my pills in ages. I haven’t had a single symptom or attack either.”
Placing jam and marmalade on the table, Zara brought across the rack of toast and freshly brewed tea leaves and took a seat opposite Glenda.
“So come on, tell me what’s going on. I can sense there’s something different and given that Fee isn’t around, it doesn’t add up for you to be looking so calm and happy.”
Glenda stared at Zara, eyes twinkling, debating whether to share her news. There was no fooling Za
ra. Admittedly if Bill hadn’t entered her life at the same time as Felicity had exited it, she would have been struggling to maintain her usual routine without her daughter’s presence. What the hell - if she told Zara at least she’d have someone to share her excitement with.
“
Ok, I’ll tell you - but you must promise not to say anything to Fee until I’ve had a chance to tell her myself” Glenda replied seriously.
Zara looked at her in confusion
; so there was something going on. Her intuition never failed to surprise her. Putting down her toast, she topped up her tea and listened with fascination as Glenda took a deep breath and began to share her story. At the same time, a distracting thought urged her to pay attention to her intuition and own fears about Steve.
All was quickly forgotten when Glenda got to the part about Bill. Suddenly everything about Glenda made sense. She was in love.
Zara felt her stomach tighten. Is that how Steve felt about his new woman?
“What about this one?” Felicity suggested, holding up a light pink silk tie.
Aidan l
ooked at her with mock horror. “Put that back where you found it. I’m not wearing a pink tie. It’s a chef interview, Fee, not an interview for a bank manager. I’d rather wear a noose.”
Felicity reluctantly replaced the tie and huffed slightly. She was beginning to grow tired of Sydney. Aidan had been such fun since their friendship had blossomed. He had an outgoing, daredevil personality and was so relaxed and chilled that she found herself becoming a different person around him. He’d encouraged her to try so many things that she’d have shunned before. She’d actually enjoyed the Roo burger he’d cooked her, washed down with a chilled beer straight from th
e bottle. She had laughed at the irony; a man that looked so much like her ex, encouraging her to do all the things that her ex had despised and that Maurice would have found so remotely unladylike and ghastly. It was refreshing to try out this new version of herself.
The biggest problem was that Sydney city itself hadn’t captured her heart in the way she thought it would.
Visiting Bondi with Aidan had been a fun experience – the beach was every bit as breath-taking as she’d imagined, the same as Manly. Yet it felt wrong. Something inside was telling her it was time to move on. With just over seven weeks remaining, she wanted to see more of Australia and if that meant saying goodbye to Aidan, then she’d have to make the sacrifice. She just needed to find a way to tell him.
“
Did you want to go and get that bag we saw?” Aidan asked, failing to notice Felicity’s lack of enthusiasm.
Biting her lip, Felicity considered the small, simple bag that she’d seen a few days previous
ly. Her oversized soft calfskin shopper bag wasn’t practical and despite being extortionately expensive and at the height of fashion, it would make sense to take Aidan’s advice and replace it with something more relaxed.
“
Erm, ok. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt whilst we’re here” Felicity said, stroking her shopper bag lovingly. It was hard to believe she was agreeing to replace something that most women would give anything for, with something that wasn’t even leather. Australia was having a strange effect on her.
Following Aidan out of the men’s clothing store, Felicity’s heart leapt as she spotted a travel agency on the opposite side of the road. At precisely the same moment, a red coach destined for ´Brisbane´ shot past her at speed.
“
Oh my goodness.”
Aidan stopped walking, suddenly aware that Felicity was stood transfixed and open mouthed.
“What is it?” he asked curiously, following her gaze.
Shaking her head in amazement, Felicity looked into Aidan’s eyes, ready to tell him of her travel plans
, but quickly stopped herself. The way he was staring at her was a familiar look. The small smile, twinkling eyes and longing gaze. It was the look of a man very much with loving feelings. She shifted uncomfortably. How had she failed to notice it before now?
Quickly recovering
from her astonishment, she squinted, looking into the distance at the rapidly retreating red coach.
“
I thought I saw somebody I knew, but I was mistaken, it’s not them” she lied, brushing her hair away from her face.
She felt uneasy. Even though she’d been aware that Aidan had been flirting with her since the day they’d met, she hadn’t realised it had progressed into something else on his part. She thought she’d made it crystal clear that she shared no mutual attraction or intention of taking it further than friendship. Surely he’d understood that when she’d told him all about James and his resemblance? Not to mention the fact that she wouldn’t want to be involved romantically with someone who reminded her of the negative and disturbing emotions she still had from that relationship.
Why was it so impossible for a woman and a man to just be friends? She’d heard of other women that did it, yet it had always failed to work in her case. Despite purposely not giving flirtatious signals and doing her utmost to establish ´friendship only` boundaries and comments at all times, Aidan had failed to take the hint. How could she have been so stupid.
“
You know, maybe its best I just head back to the hotel. I have a bit of a headache and you’ve got your interview to prepare for anyway.”
Aidan looked at Fee quizzically.
“You don’t want to get the bag then? I have plenty of time to prepare for the interview; all I need to do is sharpen my knives and wash my whites” he joked.
Felicity stared at him stony faced. She was no longer in the mood for his humour. She wanted to get away from him as quickly as possible and try to remedy the situation.
“I’ll get the bag another day. In fact, I think I’ll make a quick stop at the pharmacy on my way back to the hotel. I’ll leave you to carry on shopping and we’ll catch up later once I’ve had a lie down to get rid of this headache.”
Ignoring Aidan’s confused and disappointed demeanour, Felicity hugged him in her usual friendly manner.
“Ciao, mister. Good luck with the preparation. Let me know how tomorrow’s interview goes.”
“
But I thought you said we’d catch up later? I was thinking we could grab a few beers – get me some Dutch courage for tomorrow” Aidan joked hopefully.
Heart sinking, Felicity saw straight through his gesture. He truly was smitten. Oh dear
God, how had she ended up in this situation after just ten days?
Careful not to show her panic, she laughed off his comment.
“You have all the Dutch courage you need. The job is yours, be positive! As for beers – you know I’m not a beer girl. Stop trying to turn me into an Ozzie.”
Smiling at her, Aidan shrugged his shoulders in defeat.
“
Ok, hon. Speak to you tomorrow. Hope the headache eases up.”
Waving goodbye, Felicity turned righ
t into a narrow side street in the direction of the pharmacy, annoyed at herself.
Thirty-
one years old and unable to give off the correct vibes to attract the type of man she desired. First the whole gut wrenching situation with Dan that she still couldn’t think about without feeling stupid and sick. And now this.
Knowing Aidan was well out of sight, she cut through a back alley that led north in the direction of her hotel, suddenly remembering the reference to Brisbane. As much as she’
d always discredited anyone who talked of fate and destiny, firmly believing that she created her own reality, she couldn’t ignore the coincidental travel agency and coach that she’d seen.
Only that morning, she’d overhead a couple chatting about Brisbane whilst sipping her coffee in the ultra-modern hotel breakfast area, and had been intrigued to hear that it was among the woman’s list of favourite cities. Scouring the internet for highlights, she’d discovered that although it wasn’t coastal, there were certainly enough nearby excursions and attractions to contemplate.
There wasn’t much more she could do in Sydney. Waking up to breakfast in the hotel, spending the days shopping or with Aidan and the evenings frequenting restaurants and bars, wasn’t how she’d envisaged spending her sabbatical. After almost giving up on her career and everything she’d worked for to force this break, she needed to make her time count. She needed to find out exactly what she was doing in Australia. And she needed to get away from Aidan. Fast.
Reaching her hotel, she passed through the cool marble reception and headed to her room, formulating a plan. Closing the door behind her and kicking off her shoes, she sat at the desk area and switched on her laptop. She sighed as her work email account opened itself in the background and the bold Inbox figure of over three hundred unopened messages caught her attention. She had purposely been avoiding contact with Maurice through fear of her attention being sucked back into her work. The overwhelming desire to scan the messages surfaced, as it had every day for the last ten days. She ignored it, quickly closing the page window before she had a chance to succumb.
As much as
she was missing her work and the office, she knew it would defeat everything she’d achieved so far by allowing herself to concentrate on her life in London. Typing into the search engine page, she waited patiently for the results to be displayed, feeling butterflies for the first time in over a week.
Scanning the flight results for Brisbane, she found an option leaving the following evening. Ignoring the niggling feeling of guilt for planning to leave so s
uddenly without informing Aidan, she entered her credit card details into the webpage.
Holding her breath, she watched as a new page loaded confirming her flight booking. It was done. She was leaving Sydney. Walking over to the large wardrobe where her expensive clothes were carefully hung, she began taking things off hangers; her mind
was contemplating how she would break the news to Aidan.
“At least give me a chance to explain, darling” Phillip’s voice drooled down the phone. Sylvia huffed in irritation. She had a three o’clock client followed by a photoshoot for a national magazine. She didn’t have time to play Phillip’s games.
“
Explain what? How you haven’t been in contact for over two weeks? Do you seriously think I give a shit, Phillip?” she said, frustration turning into anger. Who did he think he was? Did he truly expect to call her out of the blue after their last conversation of calling time on the relationship and she be grateful for it?
“
Whoa, listen, you’re over-reacting. We both knew we needed some time out but I’m ready now, darling. I get it. I get the whole commitment thing. And I want to do it” he replied, voice softening. “With you, Sylvia. I want to do it with you.”
Holding the phone away from her ear in shock, Sylvia looked at her assistant and shook her head in amazement, before bursting into laughter.
“You really are something, Phillip. I told you that I wanted to end things. That’s E. N. D. That means over. Done with. Finished. Let it sink in to that tiny mind of yours. I don’t want you, Phillip and I certainly don’t want commitment with you.”
Sylvia noticed her assistant staring at her with wide, shocked eyes and quickly walked toward the kitchenette area for more privacy.
A stunned silence greeted her from the other end of the line. She was certain that Phillip had just received his first real rejection from a woman. She waited with interest as she heard him clear his throat.
“
So there isn’t anything I can do to win you back?” he asked in a small, hurt voice.
Sylvia looked at the handset in confusion. Was he serious?
Phillip Moore was actually grovelling and sounding genuinely sincere. She felt a gentle pull on her heart strings. She’d been harsh in order to protect herself from his egotistical and self-assured arrogance that he’d easily win her back. Had she over reacted?
“
I’m sorry, Phillip; I just feel we are too different for one another. I can’t see this relationship working in the longer term. I want a man who doesn’t need me to push him for his time and focus. Someone that makes me feel wanted. I don’t feel that with you” Sylvia said sadly.
Phillip
sighed in defeat.
“
I love you though. I didn’t realise it until now. But I think I was scared; I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I guess I didn’t know how to deal with it, so I backed off. Too little too late, I suppose.”
Listening quietly, Sylvia felt herself soften to his words. She wasn’t used to him speaking so openly and honestly. It was a glimpse into the part of him that had originally attracted her in the first instance when she’d been scheduled in as his substitute make
-up artist. Whilst making him presentable for his morning show, she’d found herself intrigued as he made notes for his show’s topic debate. He’d seemed genuinely moved by the plight of the street children in India. Asking her opinion on whether his questions were ethical, she had warmed to him as she found he’d shared lots of her views. He had even used one of her quotes for his interview.
Closing her eyes and hoping she wasn’t about to make a regrettable decision, she took a deep breath.
“Maybe its best we meet and talk in person. I can’t pretend that I love you too because a lot of my feelings I have blocked towards you and, in honesty, I’m uncertain of whether we have a future. But if that is truly the way you feel, then I’m willing to give things a try.”
A small part of Sylvia felt heavy a
s she arranged to meet him the following day at his house. She hung up the call and glanced at her watch, trying to decipher her true feelings for Phillip. It was unhealthy to constantly question his intentions and feelings towards her and even now, after his declaration, she wasn’t sure if she could trust him. What if he was just saying these things to win her over? Would he then get what he wanted and once again leave her hanging and waiting for his time and focus?
Sylvia’s assistant lo
omed awkwardly in the doorway. “Sylvia, Donatella and her team have arrived. She’s in the dressing room.”
It was time to put her personal issues aside; Sylvia replaced her mobile in her pocket and followed her assistant out of the kitchenette. Donatella was a demanding client. She would need to have a clear mind in order to do her job properly.