Marie Sexton - Between Sinners And Saints (30 page)
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Authors: Marie Sexton
“Yes,” Levi said. The more they talked about it, the clearer it became in his own mind, and the clearer it became, the more he realized it was true. “Dad, you’ve spent all this time worrying about me, but this isn’t about me at all. It’s about Jaime. I want Jaime to be happy, and what makes him happy isn’t just me. It’s
us.
It’s our family. He needs us all.
He’s
who’s truly important here.”
His father smiled at him. “You’re saying God knew Jaime needed a family and somehow your sin is the cost we all have to pay in order to do God’s work?”
It all made sense in his head and in his heart, even if it sounded ridiculous when his father said it. “Yes. I think the good our family can do for him is more important than the sin I might commit in the process. It’s certainly more important than the sin you might commit by accepting him.”
His father nodded, looking at the floor again as he pondered what had been said. He wasn’t arguing. He wasn’t being defensive, and Levi suddenly realized how close they were to resolving the issue once and for all.
“Dad, I don’t expect you to change your mind about church doctrine. That’s too much to ask. But I hope you can accept that I’m happy. And, more importantly, I think Jaime’s happy.” He glanced over at Jaime, who smiled at him in confirmation. “I can’t apologize for being happy, Dad. I won’t. All I’m asking is for you to be happy for us, too. At the very least, be happy for Jaime, because his happiness is more important to me anyway.”
His father leaned back in his chair, eyeing Levi appraisingly. Levi knew the look. He’d seen it many times. It meant just maybe his father was changing his mind. He seemed to ponder it for a very long time, and Levi tried not to fidget while he waited.
Finally, Abraham sat forward on his chair, scooting to the edge so he could reach over to Levi. He put his hand on his shoulder. “Your mom’s right about one thing,” he said. “Whatever you were doing before is in the past. And I believe you when you say what you have with Jaime isn’t only about sex.”
“Does that make a difference?”
“I don’t know if it does to God, but I think maybe it does to me. The act itself is a sin, but I see what your mom means when she says your heart is whole again, Levi. You’re putting Jaime’s needs ahead of your own, and the only way a man can do that is out of love.” His dad smiled. “Maybe that’s not such a sin after all.”
Relief flooded through him. He closed the distance between them, moving to his knees in front of his dad’s chair and hugging him tight. “Thank you!”
His dad hugged him back. “I love you, Levi. We all do. We always have.”
“I know,” Levi said, almost laughing. “But having you accept me means a lot more.”
“I can’t believe it,” Levi said to Jaime for at least the hundredth time as they climbed into bed that night. “I really can’t believe it.”
“Did you mean what you said?” Jaime asked as Levi pulled him across the bed and into his arms. “Do you think God put us together?”
“There’s not a doubt in my mind,” Levi said.
Jaime smiled, relaxing against him, melting under his touch. Levi kissed him, letting his fingers explore soft, pale flesh. Jaime seemed to open up underneath him, inviting him in, kissing him hungrily, grinding against him as Levi’s hands wandered. He loved the way Jaime sighed and whimpered. He loved the way he could still be shy, even as he was being aggressive.
He wasn’t surprised when Jaime reached for the massage oil. Jaime’s hand slid down Levi’s shaft, covering him with oil.
“Don’t say no,” he said, looking up into Levi’s eyes.
Although the thought of truly making love to Jaime was intoxicating, it still worried him a great deal. It felt like such a gamble, and it was a chance he wasn’t sure he wanted to take. “I’m scared, Jaime.”
“Of me?”
“Of losing you.”
Jaime smiled at him, shaking his head. “I’ve learned over the last few months that being scared isn’t a good reason to avoid something.”
But Levi wasn’t sure it was so simple. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I know,” Jaime said. He wrapped his arms around Levi and kissed him, and as he did, he rolled them over so he was on top, straddling Levi’s hips. His kiss was insistent and sure.
“You hang on,” he said to Levi. “I think it’s time I learned to drive.”
Marie Sexton lives in Colorado. She’s a fan of just about anything that involves muscular young men piling on top of each other. In particular, she loves the Denver Broncos and enjoys going to the games with her husband. Her imaginary friends often tag along. Marie has one daughter, two cats, and one dog, all of whom seem bent on destroying what remains of her sanity. She loves them anyway.
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