Marriage On Demand (24 page)

Kyle looked up as they entered. "Any news?" she asked.

He shook his head. "Do you really think
Elizabeth
is going to be okay? What if something happens to her? Jeez, Travis can't lose her now. He's the only one of us to find somebody worth keeping."

"Kyle, you're overreacting," Rebecca said. "Women have babies all the time.
Elizabeth
is young and healthy, and she's already had one child. There's no reason to be afraid."

The door opened and a strange man stumbled in. His pale features were drawn. He looked as if he hadn't slept or shaved in three days.

When he saw the other people in the room, he smiled weakly. "My wife and I just had a boy, almost eight pounds." He sank onto one of the chairs and shuddered. "Oh, God, I don't know how we got through it. The pain kept coming. I don't know how she stood it. I told her to scream, but she wouldn't. I tried to help. I tried to remind her about her breathing." He dropped his head into his hands. "It was horrible. I just wanted to run. It's not like in the movies, ya know? How can I ever face her again?"

Rebecca watched the rest of the color drain from Kyle's face. Even
Austin
looked a little shaken. She walked over to the man. "How's your wife now?"

"Fine." He looked up at her. His eyes were bloodshot. "Her folks are with her, and everyone is happy. Like it never happened. Not me. I'll carry this to my grave." He lurched to his feet. "I'd better go check on her." He glanced around at the three of them and smiled vaguely. "Good luck." The door swung shut behind him.

Kyle dropped onto the nearest chair.

"
Elizabeth
is going to die."

"No, she's not," Rebecca said briskly. "Men. You're less than useless. Try to keep a positive outlook, Kyle. If something was wrong, we'd have been told."

"If there was time," he said morosely.

She crossed to
Austin
and smiled up at him. "I give up."

Austin
didn't look much better than Kyle. "Aren't you worried?"

"A little," she said. "But childbirth is a normal part of a woman's life.
Elizabeth
will be fine."

Before he could answer, she wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned against him. She forced herself to relax as she waited to be pushed away.
Austin
stood immobile for so long she thought he might not even be aware of what she was doing. Then he brought his arms up and encircled her body, holding her close. She breathed a sigh of contentment Looks like her idea had been dead-on. He needed the touching he'd been deprived of so many years before. He needed to know he was loved, not just desired.

"I didn't mean about
Elizabeth
," he said, resting his chin on her head. "Are you scared for yourself? When it's your time?"

"I try not to think about it," she admitted. "Sometimes it's frightening to think about going through labor. I don't deal all that well with pain. Then I think about having a baby, and I know it will be worth it in the end. Birth is a natural part of the cycle of nature. I want children, and this is how I'm going to get them."

"I wouldn't want anything to happen to you."

Her heart fluttered. That statement was the closest
Austin
had ever come to admitting he cared.

"I feel responsible for the pregnancy," he continued. "Bad enough that your life has been turned around without anything else making it worse."

Okay, so that wasn't exactly the romantic declaration she'd been hoping for, but it was enough.

The door behind them opened. They both turned and saw Travis come in. He was still dressed in green scrubs. The color had returned to his face, and he was grinning like a fool.

Rebecca smiled at him. "Well?"

His gaze swept the room. "Where are my other brothers? Or couldn't they get away?"

"Right behind you,"
came
the gruff response. "Nice of you to wait until we got here."

Jordan and Craig entered the waiting room. Craig, a cop in
Sacramento
, was still in uniform. Jordan, the black sheep and only fire fighter in four generations of policemen, was wearing jeans and a T-shirt.

Travis turned and held out his arms. The two tall men moved into his embrace. Kyle crossed the room to be included. The four Haynes brothers clung to each other, communicating silently what they could not put into words.

Rebecca felt a lump forming in her throat. When she had her child, her sisters would come up to be with her, as would her parents. The warmth and support of her family would allow her to get through whatever she had to.

She turned to
Austin
, ready to share the moment. He stood stiffly, his hands balled into fists at his sides. The stark pain was back in his eyes. His expression of longing tore at her. In that instant, when she saw down into the empty, hungry part of his soul, she realized he'd spent his entire life on the outside looking in. Although he'd made friends with Travis and his brothers, not once had he been pulled inside the circle of closeness.

Slowly, cautiously, so as not to startle him, she placed her hand on his back. He relaxed slightly, but didn't acknowledge her presence. Still, it was enough that she could be with him and that she knew the truth about him. Tonight she would take the next step in her campaign.

She looked up and saw Travis standing beside her. He'd walked over and held out his hand. When
Austin
took it, Travis shook once, then f0lded him into his embrace.

Rebecca had to swallow back tears. "You never told us, Travis," she said, sniffing. "What did you have?"

He released
Austin
and grinned at Rebecca. Bending down, he kissed her on both cheeks. "A girl."

"What?" Craig stared at his brother. "Did you say a girl?"

Kyle raised his eyebrows and placed his hands on his hips. "That's not possible. There hasn't been a girl born into this family in four generations."

"There is now," Travis said, grinning like a proud papa. "She's as beautiful as her mother."

Craig shook his head. "A girl. I have three boys. Dad had four boys. He's one of six boys. So how did you get a girl?"

Travis puffed out his chest. "Just lucky, I guess."

"I think it's because you were in love," Rebecca said.

Craig stared at her as if she'd grown another head. Kyle laughed out loud. Only
Jordan
didn't smile. "I think she's right," he said.

While all the Haynes brothers looked very similar with their dark, curly hair and handsome features,
Jordan
was the loner. As Rebecca met his gaze, she realized he'd always been the one most like
Austin
. Although Travis was her husband's closest friend,
Jordan
shared his inclination to stand outside the circle and look in. He was the quiet one, the rebel the other brothers never ceased teasing about becoming a fire fighter, instead of a cop.

The other brothers gathered around Travis and started slapping him on the back. She looked up at
Austin
. "Maybe we should go look at the baby."

He nodded and placed his hand on the small of her back. Before they could leave,
Jordan
stopped them. "I never got to congratulate you," he said, looking at
Austin
. "You got lucky. Don't let her get away."

"I won't,"
Austin
answered.

Rebecca wanted to believe his comment meant something, but she was sure he was just being polite. Then
Jordan
turned to her. "I hope you're happy," he said, his tone sincere. Then he touched her face with his fingers and bent to kiss her. The brush of his lips was quick and warm, and overwhelmingly sad. In that split second of connection, she felt his emptiness. Startled, she tried to read his expression. Like
Austin
,
Jordan
Haynes had learned to hide what he was thinking.

"Maybe you should find someone of your own," she said, drawing her eyebrows together.

"Unlikely," he replied, and walked back to his brothers.

She stared after him. What was
Jordan
's story? He was the best-looking of the brothers and all of them were easy on the eye. If the stories were true, he'd always been the quiet one. What had happened to make him withdraw?

As they approached the nursery, she shook off thoughts of
Jordan
. As much as she liked all the Haynes brothers, right now her husband required her full attention.

They stopped in front of the glass wall separating the nursery from the hallway. "They're so small," she said. A black haired infant directly in front of them waved a fist in the air and made sucking motions.

"Oh, my." Her breath caught in her throat.

Back in the waiting room, with Kyle and Austin so nervous, she'd been able to handle the thought of having a baby. She wasn't showing, she didn't feel sick, and she'd only missed one period. Although she knew in her head she was pregnant, she didn't really feel any different. Even the conversation about going through labor hadn't affected her.

But now, staring at these tiny infants, she felt the heavy responsibility settle on her shoulders. This wasn't an intellectual discussion about some event far off in the future. This was real. She was actually going to have a baby.

A nurse walked into the nursery. "Which one would you like to see?" she asked.

"Baby Haynes," Rebecca said. "She was just born."

"Let me see if she's cleaned up." The nurse disappeared into a back room. Seconds later she returned, a tiny child nestled in her arms. She moved to the glass partition and brushed the pink-and-ivory blanket away from the baby's face.

The little girl, so small and red-faced, opened her big eyes and blinked fuzzily. Her mouth was the shape of a tiny rosebud. Even with her blotchy skin and wisps of light brown hair, she was beautiful.

"Oh,
Austin
, isn't she wonderful?"

When he didn't answer, Rebecca glanced at him. He was staring at the infant as if she was the most precious thing he'd ever seen. Rebecca felt her eyes start to burn. She blinked to hold back the tears. Then
Austin
reached for her hand. His fingers slipped between hers and he squeezed.

Together they watched the newborn snuggle deeper into the blankets and fall asleep. Rebecca didn't bother to brush away the tears, not even when
Austin
put his 'arm around her and pulled her close. When his free hand touched her still-flat belly, she smiled with contentment. They were going to have a child. Pray God they found their way together and were able to give their baby the warm, loving home every child deserved.

* * *

Austin
picked up the television remote control and started hunting through the channels. From his place on the sofa he could see Rebecca cooking in the kitchen. After they'd left the hospital, they'd talked about going back to the carnival, but Rebecca had admitted to being tired. He certainly didn't need to spend any more time in the crowds, avoiding gossip and old lovers. So they'd come home.

The news show couldn't hold his interest. He glanced up and watched his wife move from the stove to the counter and back. His wife. He'd never planned to say those words.

He'd never thought he would get involved, get married or have a child. It had happened so quickly. He hadn't lied that morning when he'd told Rebecca that while he might regret getting her pregnant, he didn't regret the child.

But it scared the hell out of him. He grimaced, remembering the man who had come into the waiting area and talked about the torture his wife had gone through to have their child. He could still see the horror in his eyes and hear the fear in his voice.

Austin
hit the remote again and switched from the news to a baseball game. As much as he wanted a child, he would give his life to keep anything from happening to Rebecca. He couldn't bear knowing he'd hurt her by their living arrangements; he would never survive if he knew the pregnancy would do her harm.

They were going to have a child. He leaned back on the sofa and tried to absorb the words. They'd had little meaning until he'd seen Travis's daughter. She'd been so tiny.

How did anyone take care of something that small? How was he supposed to know what a baby needed or wanted?

"It'll be about ten more minutes until dinner," Rebecca called.

"Fine. Do you want me to set the table?"

She looked up and smiled. "Already done."

She'd taken her shoes off when they'd come upstairs. Her hair was pulled back in a loose braid, with a few wisps floating around her face. Her dark eyes flared with life and contentment. From the first moment he'd seen her, he'd thought she was beautiful inside and out. Time had convinced him his initial assessment was correct. Rebecca was one of those rare souls who truly believed there was good in world. She didn't use sarcasm in her speech. She thought the best of everyone until proved otherwise, sometimes even after seeing proof that person had no good side.