Mila (Heartbreaker #3) (6 page)

See you tomorrow!

As I laid in bed later, I thought about Mila and wondered why she’s adamant we can only be friends because she hasn’t been acting like we’re only friends. The way she kissed me was certainly not the kiss of friends.

I can’t make her see something if she doesn’t want to. I’ll just be there for her as a friend. Should things move into a more romantic direction with her, then that’d be awesome.

Now, as I make my way to her house, I hope she won’t send mixed signals my way. When I pull into her driveway, I leave the car running and make it up to the door as she’s stepping out. Even in jeans and a t-shirt, she still looks fantastic.

After saying hi, the first thing she does when she reaches me is gingerly touch the purple bruise on the corner of my eye. “That looks like it hurts.”

“Nah, I’m used to it. It’s kind of a common thing in martial arts. I’m okay, I promise.” I open her door for her and then we make our way to my parents’ house.

As soon as we pull in the driveway, my mom is standing on the front stoop. “Just to warn you, my mom is a big goof and my dad is a little boisterous. They mean well. They can just be a lot to take. Just let me know if they’re overwhelming you.”

Mila just gives me a smile and climbs out of my car. “
Ciao,
Mrs. Burns.”

I watch her go right to my mom and kiss both of her cheeks. I reach them as my mom wraps her arm around Mila’s waist and leads her into the house.

“Hi, Mom. Yeah, I’m great! Thanks for asking,” I mock from behind her. She just turns her head and gives me a wink. Wonderful, she’s going to try to play matchmaker. Oh well, it’s on her when it fails.

“
Dio Mio,
Brian,” Mila whispers.

My mom has the painting I bought at Mila’s show hanging in the living room above the fireplace. It was such a beautiful piece, and I wanted Mom to have something that Mila painted. Yes, I paid a mint for it, but it’s an anniversary/birthday present for my mom, who loves art.

Mila turns to face me, and I can’t read the look on her face. “I can’t believe you bought this piece.”

“I love it. I think it’s a truly beautiful piece.”

“Do I hear my boy?” my dad says as he enters the room. Mila sure isn’t shy and goes right to him. After she introduces herself, my dad pulls her into a bear hug. “Please call me Jack. Brian says you wanted to see my work.”

They disappear down the hall until I hear the door to his workshop open and close.

My mom laces her arm through mine. “She’s lovely, honey. I can see why you like her.” She says the last part in a whisper.

“She just wants to be friends, Mom.”

I give her a smile and head out to my dad’s workshop. I step through the door and find my dad showing Mila a bench that he’s working on. She reaches out and runs her hand over the polished wood.

“Jack, this is beautiful work. I can’t believe you do this all by hand.”

My dad’s chest puffs up, and I swear I can see his head swell. He takes a lot of pride in his work and always has.

“Hey, guys. Isn’t his work great?” I say to Mila.

“
Fantastico!
I really would love to have you make something for me.”

My dad tells her to think about what she wants and to let me know and he’ll make it. Of course he would. I can tell he really likes her. I hope neither he nor Mom get any ideas. I don’t want Mila to feel like she’s being pressured into being with me, should she ever decide to.

After eating lunch with my parents, we take our leave. “I really like your parents. They seem like really good people.”

“They are. I’ve been luckier than most kids who get placed in foster care. They were strict, but fair while I was growing up. It’s definitely because of them that I’ve accomplished all I have. I was picked on a lot growing up. I was a scrawny kid and they liked to call me orphan boy. That’s why my dad put me in martial arts. It gave me self-esteem and put a little bulk on me.” I take a deep breath and take a chance asking her something I don’t even know if she’ll want to do. “Would you like to come watch me sometime, see what it is that I can do?”

She doesn’t even hesitate. “
Si
, I’d love to. Maybe you could teach me some karate moves?”

“Sure, I could teach you stuff for sure.”

“Great. I still can’t believe you bought that painting. That was my favorite piece. It was therapeutic to paint it. I had just moved here. I was dealing with some stuff, especially after my father’s death and all of the drama with that. Nico, Gaia, and I have a half-brother and sister and the half-sister keeps emailing me, wanting to talk and get to know us. I’m not sure if I’m ready for it. I find myself painting while I think about everything, and it seems to translate beautifully to the canvas.”

Jill had mentioned the situation with Nico’s dad and his death to me when she got back from Italy. “I’m sorry about your father, even with all of the drama. I was telling the truth when I said the painting was beautiful. There was just something about it that caught my attention.”

I pull into her driveway and put the car in park. I open her door and help her out. “You’re such a gentleman.”

When she smiles at me like she is right now, wide and bright, I want to grab her and kiss the fuck out of her.

Hell, now I’m thinking about fucking her right now. This is the wrong time, so I will my erection to go down. We’re quiet as we walk toward her front door. When we reach it, I grab her hand. She makes me nervous and unsure of myself, but I’ve always had trouble around women I’m attracted to. I turn her toward me.

“Thanks for being so great to my parents. They’re a little crazy and overwhelming.”

She shocks me when she reaches up and cups my cheek. “Brian, they’re amazing people. It’s very clear they love you very much, although it does make me miss
mia madre.”
She reaches up and kisses both of my cheeks. “I’ll talk to you this week.”

“Okay, have a good week.”

I get in my car. First thing I need to do when I get home is jerk off. Mila’s got me all twisted up and horny. I’ve tasted her and I want more. Next I need to work out and work myself into exhaustion so I can stop thinking about her.

Chapter Six

Mila

It’s been two weeks since I went with Brian to his parents’ house. I think it’s safe to say he’s becoming my best friend. We’ve spent just about every day together, or at least every day talking on the phone. I’ve noticed that he hates to text and would rather talk, which I love.

Two weeks ago, I was struck with inspiration for a new sculpture. I worked on it for over twelve straight hours and finally I stopped when Brian showed up for a lunch date I’d forgotten about. He could tell I was a mess, so he made me get in the tub to soak while he made me tea. Once I was out, he rubbed the knots and stiffness out of my shoulders.

I had to fight to control of myself because every time he kneaded my stiff, sore shoulders, I moaned like I was coming. I was getting myself worked up and could feel his fingers spasm against my skin. After that, he left me so I could get dressed. While I did that, Brian ordered us lunch. We spent the rest of the evening talking. We watched a movie and did what he called “vegging out.” It was glorious, and my mind felt so much clearer after he left.

I met him for lunch almost every day. Every time I showed up at his office to meet him, Jill gave me a look. I told her that we were just friends who enjoyed spending time together. I wasn’t going to tell her that our lunch dates ended with kisses that curled my toes and caused an ache to bloom in my belly.

This past weekend, Brian came over for pizza and a movie. When he got to my house, he was dressed in a t-shirt, jeans, and tennis shoes. I wanted to rip his clothes off his body, and he was wearing those damn glasses of his that I love so much. When he came over, he handed me a bottle of wine and kissed my lips softly.

“How was your day?” he asked as he followed me into the kitchen. I pulled down two wine glasses while I let him open the bottle of Nero d’avola
.

“It was productive. I finished that sculpture this morning. I’ll show it to you after we eat.”

Just then, the pizza arrived. We set it up in my little kitchen nook. He shared that his mom always made them eat at the table. I told him that my family was the same way. My momma always said it gave us lots of time to talk about our day, about the stuff going on in our lives.

He hasn’t told me, but I don’t think he’s had very good relationship luck, which I find surprising because he’s the most amazing man I’ve ever met. He’s sweet, passionate, funny, and the best kisser. He treats me with care and respect, and I know that’s because he was raised right. I keep having to push away the overwhelming sadness that washes over me whenever I have to remind myself that we can never be more than friends.

If I hurt him, which I’d more than likely do, I’d never forgive myself. The guys before him were sweet, but there was no passion, so it was easy to walk all over them. Brian, I had a feeling, wouldn’t let me.

After we finished eating, we cleaned up together, which was another thing I liked. He didn’t even ask. He just jumped right in and helped. I kept looking for his flaws, but I’ve been unable to find any. No guy is this perfect, except he is. He’s definitely making me want things I’m pretty sure I would screw up.

We watched a newly released comedy, and by the time it was half over, we were locked in a heavy make-out session. Brian was on top of me, resting between my legs. His hard cock was nestled against my pussy, which was throbbing in time with my heartbeat. His tongue was in my mouth, brushing against mine.

“Brian, I need to come,” I moaned.

“Okay, baby.”

He slid his hand down my stomach and inside my shorts. The moment he came in contact with my clit, I cried out. He used his fingers to work me over until I was so wet I could feel it running down my pussy. First one finger, then another entered me. I arched against him. I felt his fingers tap against my sweet spot and soon, I was coming so hard that my eyes felt like they were rolling back in my head.

He gentled his movements and kisses until I finally regained some brain power. I tried to undo his pants, but he pulled away. “I’m going to go.”

“W-Why? You didn’t get to finish.” He bent down and kissed my lips one more time.

“Well, not necessarily. I need to clean up in your bathroom real quick.” It took me a minute to get what he meant and then I smiled.

“
Si,
I understand. I want to show you my sculpture real quick when you’re done.”

He agreed, and I watched him disappear down the hall. I gulped down the last of my wine while waiting for him to return, and when he did, I led him into my home studio.

I hoped it wasn’t going to freak him out that he was kind of my inspiration for the piece. I pulled the sheet off of it and stood there, waiting to hear his thoughts. The sculpture is of a man and a woman with a little boy facing them and holding each of their hands. You can’t make out their faces, but you can feel their joy.

I was nervous because he’d gone silent and just stared at it. He finally started moving around the sculpture, running his hand over it reverently.

“Do you like it? You inspired it.”

I started chewing on my thumbnail as I waited for him to respond.

Brian came right to me. Before I knew what was happening, I was up against the wall with my legs around his waist. It became a gnashing of lips and teeth. He ground against me, causing me to moan against his lips. I speared his hair, gripping the blond strands. The kiss went on for a long time before he pulled away, resting his forehead against mine.

“I take it you liked it,” I whispered.

The breath from his laugh tickled my lips. “I love it. I don’t even know what to say, but I want to buy it. If it’s for sale, that is. I’d like for my parents to have it. Of course, please don’t feel obligated to sell it. I don’t know how the whole art thing works.”

The funniest part about that conversation was that it took place with me still pressed up against the wall and my legs around his waist. It made my heart happy that he wanted it.

“How about this. I’d love a hope chest for my bedroom, so how about we talk to your dad and maybe we can do a trade.”

“Sure, I’ll talk to him. Are you okay with that? You spent a lot of time working on this.”

It was sweet that he had been worried about cheating me. I’d have given it to him for free after seeing his reaction. Shortly after that, he left, but I could still feel him on my lips.
Dio
, I could still smell him and feel him against my body.

Now, I’m sitting in my new OB/GYN’s office, waiting for my physical. I never thought I’d have to have one again, but apparently I do since I still have my ovaries and cervix. About five years ago, I had terrible fibroids in my uterus and had to get them removed. There were complications and they couldn’t stop the bleeding, so they had to do an emergency hysterectomy. Waking up to find out that I would never have children devastated me. All my life, all I wanted was to paint and have babies.

My sister Gaia is the only one who knows. My mom happened to be on a cruise when I got the myomectomy, and I just didn’t want to admit that she was right and I should’ve looked into my options. She wanted me to try other treatments first. When I met with my doctor, the myomectomy was what I thought was my best option.

What do they say? You should always listen to your parents.

“Mila?” I get up and follow the nurse into the back, where we go through all of my vitals. “Go ahead and change into the gown and place the paper drape over your lap. Dr. Michaels will be in soon.”

I get undressed and put the god-awful, scratchy gown on and sit on the table with the drape over my lap. I, luckily, don’t have to wait long before Dr. Michaels comes in.

“Hello, Ms. Bianchi. I’m Dr. Michaels.” The older woman reaches out and shakes my hand. She then goes over my health history and surgical history. “A hysterectomy during a myomectomy is very rare, but unfortunately it can happen. Did you speak to a counselor after your procedure? When you’re given that information, especially as young as you were, it can be hard. Luckily, you still have your ovaries and there is always the possibility of surrogacy if someday you’d like biological children.”

“
Si
, I did talk to someone. I had a hard time when they told me what they had to do. I’ve always imagined I’d have lots of babies, and knowing that I’ll never carry my own hasn’t been easy, especially since my brother and his wife have one little girl and another on the way.”

It feels good to talk about it with someone. I’ve hid it from Nico and Jill and haven’t talked to Brian yet.

“I imagine it’s not easy, but the best thing to do is to be honest with people. You shouldn’t carry this alone. You shouldn’t be afraid to tell them. Just tell them it’s a shitty thing that happened.” I’m taken aback by her bluntness, but I can tell I’m going to love her.

The exam went well. After it was over, she told me that if, down the road, I decide on surrogacy, she’ll help me step by step. I just don’t have the heart to tell her that it may never happen since I’m never going to be in a relationship where that could be a possibility.

***

I pull into my brother’s driveway and grab the bag of cookies out of the passenger seat. They’re having a cookout tonight, and as far as I know, Brian’s coming after he finishes teaching a class. I told him I’d wait for him, but he said he didn’t know how long he’d be and that I should just go now and he’ll meet up with me later.

I knock and then open the door, calling out that I’m here. My big brother comes around the corner and smiles when he sees me. “Hi, baby sis.”

“
Ciao
, big brother. How are you?”

He wraps his arm around me in a huge bear hug. I close my eyes and take in the comfort that my brother has always given me. I know I need to follow my doctor’s advice and tell the rest of my family about my hysterectomy, but not today.

“I’m good, but what’s going on with you?” He pulls back enough to look me in the eye. “Jill says you’ve been spending lots of time with Brian lately. Are you two dating?”

“Dating? No, we’re not dating. We’re just friends. Good friends, actually. I don’t really do the relationship thing.” I kiss his cheek and walk away before he can ask what I mean by that. I find Jill in the kitchen, cutting up carrots and potatoes. My niece is sitting in her high chair, pounding on the tray.

“Mimi!” my adorable little niece shouts. I pull her out of her high chair and hug her tightly to my chest. I kiss her little chubby cheeks and enjoy the sound of her little giggles. I carry her as I go to my sister-in-law and kiss both of her cheeks.

“Jill, you look
bellissima
.” She really does. She’s always been slim, but now that she’s three quarters of the way pregnant, she’s all belly and boobs.

“Thank you. I feel like a whale.” She smiles at me and runs her finger down her little girl’s cheek. “How are things going?”

“Things are good.”
Good job, Mila
, I think to myself.
Keep it vague
. I’m not sure if she’s fishing for details about Brian or not. I know she knows we’ve been hanging out lately, but that we’re
just friends
.

Nicola reaches for Jill, so I hand her over. When I reach the living room I find Nico sitting on the sofa, watching a ballgame.

“Hey you,” I say as I sit down next to him.

He turns so he’s facing me. “What’s going on, baby sister?”

“Can we go out to dinner one night next week? There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.”

My stomach turns when I think about having to talk to him. It’s not like he’s going to be mad, but I guess a part of me doesn’t want to admit that I regret having the surgery done and then hiding it from everyone. How does one admit that they feel like less of a woman? Is it rational to feel this way? No way, but it’s just the way it is.

“
Si, mia sorella.
We can meet whenever you want. Is this about Brian?” he asks.

“No, it’s not. It’s just…”

Gabe calls out to Nico with his booming voice when he walks in the front door with his family, so I don’t get to finish.

We stand up to greet him, Jasmine, and little Gabe. They are one of the most beautiful couples I have ever seen. Gabe is tall, dark, and handsome and Jasmine is his gorgeous ex-model, Amazonian wife.

Jill and Nicola come out, and hugs and kisses are exchanged. They don’t notice as I slowly back away from them. Brian’s not here, and I am starting to feel like the third wheel.

In the kitchen, I pour myself a glass of wine and step out onto the deck. I lean against the railing and look out at the horizon. I can’t help but feel lonely. No, that’s not why I want Brian here, but I do want him here. Every day we’re together, I want to be more than friends. The internal battle I’ve been constantly fighting is killing me.

“Mila?” Brian’s voice startles me out of my thoughts.