Authors: Cathy Kelly
‘Evie,’ she said gently, ‘you’re going to hate me for saying
this but I’m your friend and I have to.’ She paused to take
her lunch off the tray. ‘I know you feel desperately threatened and hurt because of how quickly they got engaged and everything but, believe me, if you don’t go to
the wedding you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. Don’t
you understand?’ She rushed on before Evie could say a
word. ‘Think about what you’re doing by not going. You’re
telling your father you don’t care and that you disapprove
of him in the most public way possible, and you’re making
Rosie choose between you. She can’t possibly go if you
don’t. She’s too loyal to you to do that but she loves her
grandfather. Can’t you see?’
Hazel eyes huge with tears, Evie stared at her oldest
friend. She looked as if she’d been stabbed with her soup
spoon. Her lower Up quivered pitifully, making Olivia feel
like she’d just clubbed a baby seal. Despite the hard
exterior Evie displayed so defiantly, she was as soft as butter on the inside and was incredibly easy to hurt. She’d been
hurt so many times before that Olivia hated herself for
adding to that. She grabbed her friend’s hand in remorse.
‘I’m sorry, Evie,’ she said desperately. “I didn’t mean to
hurt you but I had to say it.’
Her friend bit her lip in misery and for a moment, Olivia
was afraid she was going to break down and sob. But
instead Evie took a deep breath, hiccuped and whispered:
‘You’re right.’
Olivia sighed with sheer relief. ‘I’m so glad, Evie. I know
it’ll be difficult but it’s the right thing.’
Evie picked up her napkin and wiped her eyes with it.
‘You’re right about making Rosie choose between me and
Dad, and you’re right about how awful it would be if I
publicly turned against him. I keep thinking about it,
worrying about what I should do and hating myself for
being childish about this.’ She gave a wry little laugh. “I
can’t believe it’s really practical, common-sense me behaving
like a prima donna …’
‘You’re not a prima donna,’ interrupted Olivia. ‘You’re
normally very level-headed but this has knocked you for
six.’
‘Well,’ Evie said ruefully, ‘the last time I lost my head, I
was about seven and somebody broke the leg off my Tiny
Tears doll! I’m a bit old for having tantrums now, it’s just
that I lose control when I think of that woman taking
advantage of Dad …’
The smile faded and Evie’s eyes were as hard as agates as
she looked at Olivia. ‘You’re wrong about Vida. She hates
me and I hate her back. I don’t trust her and if she hurts
Dad, I’ll kill her. I will.’
Olivia had never seen such a grim expression on her
friend’s face, one that frightened her. But she didn’t want
to start another pious homily.
‘Don’t be so angry, it’ll eat you up inside, Evie,’ was all
she said. ‘Come on, let’s have our lunch. I can’t send you
back to the office looking that angry and red-faced - the
rest of the staff will think I slapped you!’
Evie laughed, a high-pitched little sound, and the tension
was broken. ‘The rest of the staff wouldn’t dream of
thinking any such thing,’ she said, managing a weak grin.
They think nobody would dare slap me. They certainly
wouldn’t.’
‘You don’t mean to tell me they’re all taken in by your
tough-as-old-boots routine?’ Olivia asked with her mouth
full of tuna sandwich. ‘Don’t they know what a complete
old softie you are?’
Evie shuddered. ‘I couldn’t bear it if they did. The only
way to run an office is with an iron hand in an iron glove,’
she said loftily.
‘Can you give me hints on how to use that technique
with a crowd of delinquent school kids?’ Olivia asked.
‘Another term of 3A will drive me nuts.’
‘They can’t be that bad, surely?’ Evie said, not noticing
how dismal Olivia looked. ‘You’ve got to show them who’s
boss.’
‘Easier said than done.’ Olivia stared into her soup and felt
her heart sink at the thought that in four days’ time she’d be
facing 3A, all hyperactive after Christmas and ready to make
her life hell. Or more hellish than it felt already.
‘I never had this problem with the fifth and sixth years,’
she said. ‘But when the other home economics teacher left
last year, the replacement wanted to teach the older girls
and, being only part-time, I ended up with the horrible
third years. There are a couple of little terrors in that class.’
She put down her spoon. Her appetite, which hadn’t been
good for days, had totally vanished. ‘None of the other
teachers can bear the troublemakers but I’m the only one
who can’t control them.’
‘They’re probably all jealous as sin of you,’ Evie
declared. An expert at giving orders, she couldn’t understand
why her friend was having so much trouble with
unruly pupils.
Evie had always imagined that one look at the ethereal
Olivia would stun any class into silence. She was so lovely
looking, with her flowing blonde hair, model’s bone structure
and long, slim body. If Evie had only looked like that,
she was convinced her life would have been different. Like
a romantic novel, full of real-life heroes waiting to whisk
her off to glorious destinations with sun, yachts, magnificent
castles and family jewels. And no overdraft, lonely
nights watching TV, months of existing on the cheapest
cuts of meat because they were so broke - and definitely
no envelope-stuffing at nights to pay for Rosie’s school trip
to Stratford-upon-Avon.
But Olivia never capitalised on her beauty or even
seemed to be aware of it. At school, she’d worn the
drabbest clothes and had never hung around with the
more advanced girls in St Agatha’s who’d been dating since
the age of fifteen. Instead, she’d stayed best friends with
Evie and together they’d steered clear of boys until they
were seventeen. Evie, plump, talkative and a tad bossy to
cover her insecurity, hadn’t exactly been inundated with
offers from the local boys, so this hadn’t been too much of
a hardship. But the desperately unsure and anxious Olivia
could have had her pick of the male populace, if only she’d
wanted to.
But then, Evie thought darkly, how could any girl be
normal when her teenage years happened to coincide with
the worst years of her parents’ alcoholism? Having your
drunken mother screech abuse at you every second day for
no apparent reason wouldn’t exactly instill you with
confidence, no matter bow stunning you looked.
‘Are you really dreading going back to teaching?’ she
asked Olivia.
Her friend nodded glumly.
‘Stephen’s thrilled lo be back at work. I think he’s bored
hanging around the house with me.’ She didn’t say that she
was sure he was bored by her company. It was as obvious
as the nose on his face. Her husband was bored rigid by
her, preferred talking to total strangers at parties than
spending time with her, and his face became ten times
more animated when he was discussing work than it ever
was when she was talking to him. Suddenly, Olivia didn’t
feel as if she could reveal all this to Evie. She felt too raw
to discuss it. Too much of a failure.
“Course he’s not bored,’ Evie interrupted. ‘He’s probably
got the post-Christmas blues like the rest of us.’
Olivia shook her head morosely, thinking that Stephen
had post and pre Christmas blues. ‘No, it’s not that.
Yesterday I suggested we spend our last day going for a drive out to Howth and having lunch in one of those lovely little pubs, but he said he wanted to catch up on
work and spent the day with his nose stuck in his briefcase,’
she said. ‘If there hadn’t been a decent film on the
TV, I’d have gone round the bend. It was Sommersby. I love
Richard Gere.’
Evie sighed in sympathy and waved at the lounge boy,
trying to get his attention so they could get coffee. He
ignored her.
‘You try.’ she said.
Olivia raised her perfect profile, flicked back a strand of
fair hair and looked hopefully in the direction of the bar. A
barman and the lounge boy arrived at their table like a
shot, both looking eagerly at the elegant blonde dressed in
sleek pewter wool.
‘Two coffees, please?’ she said, with a polite smile that
didn’t reach her silver-grey eyes.
‘How do you do that?’ asked Evie, shaking her head. ‘No,
don’t bother answering. Anyway, you should have insisted
that Stephen go for a drive with you. Heaven knows he
spends enough time working, it wouldn’t kill him to go
back to work unprepared like a normal person.’
‘I know. But his job is so important …’ Olivia said
automatically.
‘You and Sasha are important too,’ Evie pointed out,
putting too much sugar in her coffee to give herself energy
for the afternoon ahead.
She failed to notice Olivia grow even more morose as
she thought of her darling Sasha. Olivia’s eyes welled up at
the thought of the beautiful little girl with those huge
trusting eyes so sad as she watched her mother steeped in
misery.
She wasn’t even a good mother anymore. She’d cried
that morning making Sasha’s breakfast, big fat tears raining
down on the toast and honey as soon as Stephen had
slammed the front door without kissing her goodbye.
That was no way to behave in front of a four year old.
She felt so ashamed. Here she was telling her best friend
how to sort out her life, how she should go to her father’s
wedding, while she, Olivia, couldn’t sort out anything. She
felt useless; boring, stupid and quite, quite useless.
Her head bent so Evie couldn’t see her brimming eyes,
Olivia took several sips of scalding coffee. She had to get
out of the pub before she broke down completely and
disgraced herself.
‘Gosh, look at the time,’ she said with a gasp. ‘I said I’d
pick Sasha up by two-fifteen and I’ll never be back in time.
I’d better go.’ Feeling dreadful to be racing out on Evie
under false pretences, Olivia got up abruptly, grabbed her
coat and kissed her friend quickly on the cheek without
looking her in the eye.
‘I’ll drive you back to your car,’ Evie offered.
‘No, it’s only across the road,’ Olivia said anxiously. ‘I’ll
walk. Finish your coffee.’ And she rushed off!
What she really wanted to do was sit down and sob her
heart out to Evie but this wasn’t the time or the place.
Evie was caught up in her own problems and Olivia
couldn’t burden her with any more. Olivia had to sort this
out on her own.
Back at her desk with a sheaf of messages in front of her,
Evie thought about Olivia’s rapid departure and felt guilty
for rattling on about Vida and her father. Olivia was right,
she thought: she had been obsessing about the wedding.
Endlessly, she realised, shamefaced. And poor Olivia had
put up with her for ages and obviously wanted to talk
about something but Evie had been so tied up with her
own problems, she hadn’t noticed.
Feeling ashamed, she picked up the phone and dialled
Olivia’s home number. The answering machine clicked on,
with Stephen’s deep, self-important voice announcing that
the MacKenzies were not at home and to leave a message
after the beep. ‘After the beep,’ he emphasised, as if he was
talking to some spectacularly dumb caller who’d never
heard an answering machine before. God, that man loved
the sound of his own voice. He’d make anyone feel stupid
with his patronising manner, Evie thought crossly. He did it
to Olivia all the time. And he was so self-important, you’d
think he was chairman the way he went on and on about
his job and how vital he was to the company.
Imagine not wanting to spend the last day of Christmas
with his family and refusing point blank to go for a drive
in Howth so he could pore over his papers. He really was
very selfish. Because he travelled so much, he and Olivia
spent very little time together. Yet Stephen never seemed
to understand that playing happy families was terribly
important to Olivia, mainly because she’d never had one
before. Doing normal family things like going for drives or
having a cosy day at home stretched out in front of the
TV with a tin of biscuits and some tea, instead of a quart
of gin and an argument, was Olivia’s idea of sheer bliss.
The only time she’d ever done normal family stuff as a
child had been with Evie’s family, which was why they
were so close. Stephen just couldn’t understand that. And
he was so obsessed with his bloody career he didn’t
appear to care.
‘Livvy,’ Evie said to the answering machine, using the pet
name she’d called her friend by when they were younger,
‘sorry I was blathering on and on about Vida at lunch. It
must have been a real pain in the neck and I’m sorry. Give
me a buzz later, will you? We should have a proper chat and
not a word about my family, I promise. ‘Bye.’