Our Totally, Ridiculous, Made-Up Christmas Relationship (8 page)

Grabbing the phone, I place it against my ear. “Hello?”

A woman’s warm velvet voice sweetly responds. “Oh! Hello, Richard! I’m Jules’s mother, Tina. I just wanted to say hi before meeting in a few hours. I’m sorry you both are running behind. I told Julie Anne to leave earlier, but you know how hardheaded she can be.”

I smirk, because I have a good idea about how stubborn Jules can be. I wonder where she picked up those traits? “Yeah, well, it’s my fault. I had to work a little later than planned. But we should be there sooner than later.”

“Perfect. So, we’ll make for a late dinner. Which is fine. I’ll see you both soon. All right? Oh! And Richard?” Without waiting for my acknowledgment, she immediately continues, “Jules has a history of picking guys who end up liking her for certain reasons. You sound different, though. I just hope you’re okay with who we are and don’t find it to be too much of a…shock. We’re down to earth like all the rest.”

Before I can respond to her weird comment, Tina hangs up and I hand the phone back to Jules. “What did she mean by ‘our family’s down to earth like the rest’? Who says that?” I see her body physically tighten up. Her blue eyes turn away from me and face the window, where she proceeds to give me the cold shoulder. It’s something she doesn’t want to talk about, and now I want to know even more, but I don’t push the matter. If she wanted me to know, she would have told me, right? Besides, all of her family’s secrets aren’t my business; I am only her boyfriend for the next few days anyway.

After a while, her hand finds mine again, and for the rest of the ride we’re quiet, just holding on to each other, traveling through the snow. As we round the corner to this gigantic cabin, I get a bit confused. “This isn’t a cabin, Jules! It’s a mansion made out of wood!” I feel Jules’s fingers tighten around mine from the idea of entering. She doesn’t respond to my comment because she seems too nervous to operate. “Hey, you’re fine.”

“I’m fine…” she mutters, holding on even tighter. “I’m fine.”

Her eyes start to tear up, and I see the crying girl from earlier creeping in. “Oh come on, Sunshine. Don’t give away your power to people who don’t deserve it. You may not be able to control the weather—or the family you’re born into—but you can control who you allow to hurt you, who you allow to affect you.”

“How do you change a lifetime or being the black sheep of the family who is always crying?”

“Well, for starters you find a moment when you would usually cry and you choose not to. You change direction and hold your head up high. And you say, ‘Fuck you, motherfuckers! I’m Jules Stone and I’m motherfucking awesome!’”

She laughs out loud, and I swear to God she snorts. She snorts, and I realize I’ve never seen something so damn adorable in my whole life. Sexdorable, even. Jules Stone is pretty damn sexdorable.

“Come on,” I challenge, nudging my hand against her knee. “Say it.”

“Kayden, no.” She keeps laughing, and I keep falling.

“Please?” I whisper, taking my hand and rubbing the back of her neck. Every time I touch her, it feels as if we have been touching for years. I don’t know how, and I don’t know why, but when I touch this girl, I feel at home.

“My name is Jules Stone and I’m motherfucking awesome!”

Pulling up toward the home, I see two Audi and one Mercedes in the driveway, and the first thing I think is,
Why the hell is Jules driving that broken-down Honda?
Before we have time to even put the car in park, the front door is opening and people are gathering on the porch.

“I’m fine, I’m fine…I’m…” she mutters, her words fading off, so I finish for her.

“Fine.” I smile and she smiles back. “We’re fine.”

She wiggles her nose once and goes to open her door but pauses. “Oh! A heads-up, I think we’re in love.” She freezes, cursing under her breath, and slaps her hand against her face. “I mean,
you
as in
Richard
. Richard and I are in love.”

“Right. I love you.” The words roll off my tongue and it scares me how much it doesn’t scare me. “Don’t open your door. Let me do it for you, ya know, since we are so deeply in love and stuff.”

She sits back in her seat and nods once. I jump out of the car and play the role of an awesome boyfriend by pulling open her door and helping her out of the car.

When she stands inches below me, I go in for the extra one-two punch and kiss her forehead. Wrapping her against my body I whisper one more time as we begin walking toward the awaiting party, “We’re fine.”

The way she snuggles into me makes me think that she actually believes me—which, in turn, secretly makes my night complete. The closer we get to the front of the cabin, the slower I begin to walk until my jaw drops to the ground and I stand frozen in place. Twisting my body toward Jules, I yank her to the side.

“Holy shit! Is that Lisa Stone?! And Danny Everson?! And holy shit—that’s Matt and Tina Stone! Holy fuck, you’re Jules Stone!” The realization sets in as I come to terms with the fact that Jules’ family is
THE
Stone family—one of Hollywood’s most celebrated families for their crazy amount of work on the big screen. And Danny Everson is known for his Oscars and insane films.

I shoot the words to Jules and watch her stumble back, saddened that she couldn’t keep the fact hidden. Then I watch her lips turn down. She’s disappointed by my realization. “Yes…
Richard
.” She scolds me with her tone, and I realize how fast I almost blew my cover.

“Right. I’m sorry. But geez…You didn’t think that was something you could have mentioned in the past five hours?!”

“It slipped my mind.” She moves toward her house, leaving me a bit stunned. It slipped her mind? I’m supposing to act through this weekend with Oscar-winning performers?

Yeah freakin’ right.

“Finally! Did you give him the wrong address or something, Julie Anne?” were the first words from her mother as she pulls her into a hug.

“No, it just so happens there’s a snow storm, Mom. No big deal.” Jules turns toward me and holds her hand out in my direction, which I take, because screw it, I’m a professional.

“Mom, Dad”—her eyes roll as she mumbles, not looking toward Danny or Lisa—”everyone else, this is Richard.”

I extend my hand and shake hands with Oscar winners. Jesus. My life just went to a pretty good place. “Nice to meet you all,” I say, and mean, more than any words I have ever spoken.

Jules’s dad,
the
Matt Stone, pats me on the back and pulls me toward the house. “You hungry, Rich? I can call you Rich, yes?”

“Sir, you can call me anything you want.” I smirk as I follow him inside. He could call me asswipe and I would be flattered. I listen to Jules talking to her mom—or well, getting scolded by her mom for not greeting her sister and Danny.

“Do you have to be so childish, Julie Anne?” Tina hisses, moving everyone into the living room.

“Sorry. Hi Lisa. Danny.” I watch Jules roll her eyes and can’t help but laugh at her stubbornness.

“Hey Jules,” Danny smiles and goes in for an awkward hug, and for some reason, the amount of time he holds on to her annoys me. “You lose weight?”

“Gained ten pounds,” Jules says, but I doubt it’s true. I couldn’t imagine her ten pounds lighter than she is now; she has perfect curves to her.

“Oh…it looks good on you.”

Awkward silence. I’m still looking at Jules’s curves, and I’m getting pissed because so is Danny. “Should we grab our luggage now?” I ask, changing the subject from the weird vibe happening. It’s nice to see another dysfunctional family. It brings me a bit of comfort.

“No, don’t worry about it. Danny and I will grab it after dinner for you. You’re our guest!” Matt pats me on the back again, and I can’t help but feel star-struck every time this guy talks my way.

“Where’s Grandma?” Jules asks her mother.

“Oh, she couldn’t make it. She said that she and the new
boyfriend
are skiing in the Alps for the holiday.” The way Tina says the word
boyfriend
has a sting to it. I’m not sure if anyone else picks up on it, but the sound of Tina’s disapproval of her mother’s new guy is pretty damn clear.

“What?! Grandma’s the whole reason I said I would come!” Jules is pouting again, so I walk over and wrap my arms around her from behind and kiss her cheek, feeling her relax into me.

Out of nowhere a little girl streaks through the cabin completely naked. She couldn’t have been any older than three or four. I help Jules remove her jacket as she chuckles at her young niece running around in her birthday suit. “Don’t mind Olivia. She’s always naked.” The sweet tone in her voice takes on an edge when she adds, “just like her mother.” Another passive aggressive comment from one of the Stone family members. I make a mental note to brace myself against these snide comments and not-so-subtle pot-shots that this family takes at one another with such malicious ease.

Lisa tries to brush off Jules’ rude comment even as the blush of embarrassment reddens her face. I can’t even lie—Lisa is also beautiful. She’s pretty skinny, but not stick-thin. Her long brown hair moves perfectly with her, and her deep blue eyes match her mother’s. She and Jules are about the same height, but if I didn’t know they were related, I would never have considered it to be true. They are opposites in almost every way. Jules has these adorable blue doe eyes, and Lisa possesses the intense, cat-shaped, sexed-up eyes that always appear in her movies.

There’s an uncomfortable silence filling the room, so I try my best to defuse it. “She’s beautiful,” I say, gesturing—but not looking—at the naked girl running around the space.

Danny laughs. “You don’t have to be nice. She looks like an alien.”

Stunned by his rude comment, I hardly know what to say. “I beg your pardon?”

“An alien,” Tina reinforces about her granddaughter. “It’s not an insult. Aliens are really the big thing in Hollywood right now. That’s what’s hot in the industry.”

“If we get her started before she’s four, she’ll be golden.” Danny chimes in.

“I think horror movies are going to be her money maker, you know, with the creepy kid look and stuff,” Lisa adds.

The three of them laugh and that’s when I see it, that’s when I notice everything that makes Jules her awkward, crying self. She came from a house of nut job Hollywood weirdos. They just called that sweet, innocent, beautiful little girl a creepy looking alien. What. The. Fuck?!

Matt, Jules’s father, is the only one who doesn’t join in on the bullying. He reaches for the naked girl and lifts her into his arms. “Don’t listen to them, Olivia. You’re a perfect princess. Now, let’s go get you into some pajamas and ready for dinner.” The little girl smiles to her grandfather and wraps her arms around his neck.

Leaning in toward Jules, I whisper against her ear, “Are they always like this?”

“You haven’t even experienced the true blue Stone family dinner yet.”

“Here, let me put your coats in your bedroom,” Danny offers, reaching for Jules’ jacket, and I toss mine off to him before watching him disappear down the hallway.

“Let me make you a drink?” I ask Jules, nodding my head toward the bar in the other room.

She turns and stares into my eyes. A smile creeps on her lips and the overwhelmed look she’s worn since we pulled into the driveway is slowly fading. “Make it a strong one.”

“Always.” Releasing her, I move toward the bar and start preparing her some fruity girl drink, because I’m almost positive that’s something she would love. Then I pull out another glass to get me some whiskey, hoping for a somewhat easy dinner and then bed. Out of nowhere, Jules’s sister Lisa appears and takes a seat at the bar, leaning forward.

I’m not a dumbass, so I know the leaning is to give me a clear shot down at her fake tits, but I only look into her eyes. “Can I get ya something?”

“I’ll just take this,” she says as she grabs Jules’s drink and starts to suck it down. “So…you’re Julie’s boyfriend, eh? I’m Lisa, the wicked sister.”

“Richard.” I extend my hand toward her, giving her my fake name, and she accepts, “Nice to meet you. I actually saw your latest film,
The Forbidden Gatekeepers
, a few weeks ago. Amazing work.”

“Well thank you. We filmed that a few years back, and it was nice to finally get it to the big screen.” She runs her fingers through her hair and leans back on her seat. “I have another fantasy film coming out in a few months. You should convince Jules to bring you to the premiere in Hollywood. I would ask her, but…”

She doesn’t finish her thought because it’s pretty much a useless comment. She knows Jules wouldn’t want to go, and I can completely understand. If there’s anything I understand, it’s sibling issues. “I’ll ask her.”

“No. Never mind. Stupid for me to even bring it up.” She edges around in her chair, making herself more comfortable, and changes the direction of the conversation. “So how did Jules and you meet?”

I shift my eyes back to Jules, realizing we never talked about how we met. Well, time to make up some bullshit. “A bar.” Easy enough—people meet at bars all the time. Lisa crumples up her nose and I can’t help but notice. “What’s wrong?”

“Jules hates bars. I think her boyfriend before you broke up with her in a bar. It’s just funny that you two met at one.”