Promise Me Darkness (4 page)

~~~~

We finally arrived at our apartment late that night. The place wasn’t that impressive. It contained one living room, a tiny kitchen, two bedrooms, and a single bathroom. We filled it with cheap furniture from Ikea and some hand–me–downs.

“I’m heading to bed. My parents had me up at the ass crack of dawn this morning and I need my beauty sleep,” Eva announced as she headed for the bathroom. "Nightie night, ya’ll."

“So which room is yours?” Ryder asked as he picked up my suitcase, making those biceps flex again.

“You don’t have to do that, Ryder.”

“I’m trying to be a gentleman,” he said with a smirk.

“You a gentleman? When did that happen?” I teased, leading him to my bedroom.

“Only for you,” his deep voice rumbled behind me.

I turned on the light, my nerves going haywire with him in my room. My tiny bedroom suddenly felt minuscule with him in it.

He sat down on the edge of my bed and stretched his long legs out on either side of me, trapping me in front of him. Bouncing up and down, he smiled at me with mischief.

“Nice bed.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “That seductive tone doesn’t work on me, Ryder.”

A deep chuckle vibrated from his chest. Lying back, he folded his hands under his head. “Works on most girls. Why not you, Maddie?”

“I’m not most girls.”

“That is the truth.” He closed his eyes then patted the bed. “Sit down,” he said, so quietly that I almost didn’t hear him.

I sat beside him and studied his face while his eyes were closed. His unshaven jaw made him look rugged and unapproachable. The bruises and cuts from the fight added to his bad boy persona. Remembering he was only here because he was joining the military, I felt fear at the thought of losing him.

“Don’t enlist, Ryder.”

He sighed heavily. Without opening his eyes, he laid his work–roughened hand on the bare skin below my shorts.

“Let’s go to sleep, Maddie.”

The warm touch on my bare thigh had me leaping off of the bed.

“I’m going to change. Don’t fall asleep in my bed, Ryder,” I warned, grabbing pajamas and racing out of the room.

In the bathroom, I leaned against the counter, feeling breathless.
Why was I so jumpy?
If there was one man that I could trust in my bed, it was Ryder. He had lounged on my bed plenty of times growing up so why was this any different?

Feeling a little bit naughty, I let myself wonder what it would be like to be desired by him. To lie in bed with him as more than friends. To be one of those girls he took home for a night.

I stopped brushing my teeth to study myself in the mirror. A blush had chased away the light color of my skin. Straight hair framed my oval face. Full pink lips and finely arched eyebrows couldn’t compensate for my too–large dark brown eyes. I sighed with resignation.
I could never compete with the beautiful women Ryder chose. They were models while I was the girl–next–door.

Chastising myself for such silly thoughts, I changed quickly into pajamas.
We were friends, nothing else.
If I was feeling awkward around him, it had to be because I hadn’t seen him in weeks.
Yeah, that sounded about right.

Returning to my room, I found him sitting on the edge of the bed, looking sexy and oh, so tempting.

“The couch is all yours,” I said.

He looked over my university t–shirt and cheeky boyshorts. I tugged the shirt’s hem down lower, suddenly feeling self–conscious. Under his scrutiny, I wondered if maybe I should have picked something less revealing.

“I’m going.” He didn’t move. The corner of his mouth turned up in a smirk. “Sure I can’t share this bed with you? Just two friends having a sleep over?”

Did he just ask to sleep with me?
The fast beat of my heart was impossible to ignore.

“Go to bed, Ryder,” I said, really needing him out of my room before I did something unpredictable.

“Goodnight, Maddie,” his deep voice rasped before standing up and leaving.

I laid down after he left and listened to him moving around the apartment.
When had Ryder become such a flirt with me?
We’ve always teased each other but this was different. Underneath the flirting lurked something real. Something dangerous.

And I wasn’t sure I could resist it.

The ear–splitting music blasted us as soon as we opened the door to the club. The place was packed. The DJ had the crowd on its feet, filling the dance floor with moving, grinding bodies. The bartenders kept everyone in drinks. From longnecks to the hard stuff, the alcohol was flowing.

I followed Eva as she pushed her way through the club. I almost stepped on her heels more times than I could count. Ryder stayed close behind me, bumping into me every few seconds.

At the bar, Eva and I waited as Ryder ordered a drink. I couldn’t help but watch him. Tonight he wore a crisp white dress shirt tucked into jeans that fit him just right. His hair looked like he had ran his fingers through it as an afterthought, giving him a sexy, just–out–of–bed look.

“You look hot, Maddie,” Eva whispered in my ear, grabbing my attention. She had talked me into wearing my new five–inch, knee high boots over skinny jeans along with an off–the–shoulder black shirt. Not my usual attire but I was feeling pretty sexy.

“You look great too,” I said. If Eva was wearing a paper sack, she would still look beautiful.

"Maddie!" Ryder called out, motioning me over. I maneuvered my way to him as he waited by the bar. When I was a foot from him, someone bumped into me. I lost my footing but he grabbed my elbow quickly to keep me steady. Either I was a klutz or invisible. People just didn’t seem to see me.

After making sure I was okay, he asked if I wanted something to drink. I said no and tried to ignore his warm hand on my elbow. When the bartender handed him his beer, he dropped his hand away to pay. I felt silly.
How pathetic was I that a simple touch could excite me so much? Must be the virgin in me.

As we moved away from the bar, he took a long drink of ice–cold beer, somehow managing to make drinking look sexy. I tried not to stare. Instead, I focused on following Eva through the crowd. Stopping near the dance floor, we stood close together as people pressed around us. I was practically squashed against Ryder’s chest. His arm rubbed against me every time he raised his arm to take another long drink of beer. It was then I decided that a crowded club wasn’t a bad thing.

I tried to focus on the music and the scene around me. Flashing blue, red, and yellow lights illuminated the dance floor, moving in perfect rhythm to the music. The DJ was up on stage, keeping an eye on the sound system controls and moving to the bass also.

Eva grabbed my arm and started to pull me out onto the dance floor. I glanced back and found Ryder watching me. His eyes never left mine as he took another long drink of beer. Slowly, his gaze moved down to my boots, caressing me from across the room. When his eyes traveled just as slowly back up my body to met my eyes again, I sucked in a breath. Pure unadulterated desire flared back at me. In that moment, he wasn’t a friend. He was a man wanting what he saw. Me.

Suddenly, I couldn’t see him anymore. The crowd was closing in around Eva and I, blocking my view of him. Eva tugged on my arm and pulled me further onto the dance floor, further from him.

As we started dancing, I wondered if maybe I had been wrong. Maybe I was reading more into it. Ryder and I had never crossed that line from friends to…well…more but what would happen if we did?

I craned my neck, hoping to find Ryder. I caught a brief glimpse of him before Eva stepped in front of me, giving me an inquisitive look.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing.” She shot me another curious look. “I’m just wondering if something’s going on between you and Ryder.”

“Don’t know what you mean,” I said, dancing.

A man moved between us, separating Eva and I. He started doing some sort of pelvic thrusting thing as he stared at me blatantly.

Eva ignored him and danced back over to me. “I’m just picking up on something between the two of you,” she said.

Were my feelings that obvious?
I wouldn’t admit out loud that I had always found Ryder amazingly handsome. Each time I saw him, my wayward feelings seemed to intensify, no matter how much I fought it. But I needed to set the record straight.

“There’s nothing between us, Eva. Ryder sleeps with anything that has boobs so I’m not going there.” It was the truth. He did sleep with any woman and despite what I felt, I wasn’t going to be one of his groupies.

“Whatever you say, Maddie. I’m just making an observation. He looks at you like he wants in your pants.”

I opened my mouth to argue when the guy wedged himself between Eva and I again.
Unbelievable!
I looked up into his sweaty face as he gyrated his hips toward me.

Looking to Eva for help, I realized that the crowd had swallowed her up and I could no longer see her. I attempted to dance around the guy but he intentionally blocked my way, stubbornly refusing to move. Taking a step closer, he reached out and touched my arm.

I moved back to escape his roving hands and bumped into another man behind me. This guy was much more aggressive. He put his hands on my waist and pulled me back against him. A hard body rubbed against mine as strong fingers squeezed my waist.

This was outrageous!
I swung around, ready to give this guy a piece of my mind, when my heart stopped.

Ryder’s striking blue eyes met my stunned stare.

"Come here," he rasped low.

I held my breath when he grasped my hips and pulled me closer. Giving the guy behind me a deadly look, Ryder tightened his hold on me and started moving to the music. The man took the hint and faded into the crowd, forgotten.

“Shit, I forgot what a good dancer you are!” Ryder whispered in my ear. Warmth raced along my neck as his breath brushed against my ear.

Something happened then. A rebellious streak ran through me. The good girl in me disappeared. Ignoring my pounding heart, I started dancing within the circle of his arms.

He wrapped an arm around my waist, drawing me closer. His hips started moving against mine. We were touching everywhere, moving intimately to the deep bass of the music.

His movements mimicked sex. Words that were normally foreign to me were now rattling around in my head — desire, need, passion.

I could do this. I could play too.
I moved down his body, my hips swaying to the music. As I traveled back up, our eyes locked. Eva’s words came back to haunt me. ‘He wants in your pants.’ But she was wrong. He didn’t see me that way. We were just having fun. Purely innocent.

I was rethinking that when one of his hands spanned my bottom to bring me closer. Leaning down, he whispered in my ear, “That was fucking hot!”

I swallowed hard as his fingers remained on my butt, burning me through my jeans. He started moving slowly, his crotch intimately nudging against me.

We were playing with fire.

The song was almost over when Eva appeared beside us. Ryder released me and moved away, leaving me disappointed when I should have been relieved. Evading Eva’s stare, I continued to dance. This time alone.

When the song ended, Ryder placed a hand back on my waist.

“Want a drink?”

“Water, please.”

His hand lingered longer than was necessary before leaving for the bar. I watched him walk away. I swear the crowd parted to let him through.

“What the hell was that all about?” Eva asked.

I shrugged and avoided her eyes. “We were dancing, that’s all.”

“Bullshit! I’ve never seen you dance like that with anyone.”

She was right.

“Maddie, be careful. He might be your friend but he’s also a womanizer. If you’re looking for a bad boy fix then he’s your guy but don’t get in over your head. It would be like playing with fire. You’ll get burned.”

“I’m not going to do anything crazy,” I said and meant it. Some teasing and close dancing didn’t mean Ryder and I were going to fall in bed together.

The latest song from Muse started blaring and people flocked to the dance floor like an angry mob. Eva grabbed my hand and led me away, pushing and shoving to get through the crowd.

Ryder met us halfway.

“Sorry it took so long,” he said, handing both of us plastic cups of cold water.

“Thanks,” Eva and I said in unison.

Leaning closer to me, Ryder voice rose over the music. “So there’s this blonde by the bar…I’m going to go talk to her.”

Heat left my body in a whoosh. Reality hit me like a cold bucket of water. I watched as he turned and disappeared into the crowd, to his newest conquest.

“Like I said, he’s a player,” Eva said, taking my hand and pulling me back toward the dance floor. “Forget him. Let’s dance.”

I forced a smile on my face and tried to force Ryder from my mind. An impossible feat.

~~~~

I only saw Ryder once after he went in pursuit of the woman. I had caught a glimpse of him draped around a gorgeous platinum blonde but that had been hours ago.

At closing time, we found him in a dark corner of the club. The blonde was all over him. Her hands roamed his body boldly as she pressed up against him. I wanted to roll my eyes. I wanted to tell her to back off. What I didn’t want was to see his hand on the blonde’s thigh.

“Douchebag,” Eva muttered, walking next to me.

Not bothering to argue with her, I stopped in front of them. "We’re ready to go, Ryder," I said over the music.

He looked away from the girl and a smile spread across his face.
Oh, no, I knew that grin!
Ryder was drunk.

“Maddie, baby!” he said, weaving unsteadily on his feet as he pushed away from the blonde and threw an arm around me.

He was so wasted.

“I can’t live without this woman,” he drunkenly told the blonde. She didn’t look too pleased as her heavily mascaraed eyes ran over me hatefully.

Ryder hugged me to his chest, making me bury my nose into his shirt. His hands ran down my back slowly as he nuzzled my hair.