Random Acts of Senseless Violence (9 page)

‘Have you been writing something every day?' Mama asked. ‘Just about' I said. ‘Oh sweetie there's been so much bad news lately it must be a tearjerker of a book' she said. ‘No it's just what happens good and bad nothing else' I said. She pulled out an old ashtray that was in the shape of a big red foot. ‘Look at this silly thing darling Michael used it when he used to smoke look what it says' Mama said. I read what it said which was I Get A Kick Out of Rhode Island. ‘I can't remember what we were doing up there but it must have been interesting' Mama said. She got up to throw it in the glass recycle garbage in the kitchen and I followed her. All the pots and pans were down on the countertops but she hadn't boxed any of them up yet.

‘Are we really going to come back here?' I asked. ‘You mean to the apartment sweetie?' she asked. ‘Yes' I said. ‘Oh yes my darling don't worry we will I just don't know when' Mama said.

I don't know Anne. I don't think we are coming back here. I don't have any reason to say that except that I think it's true. We'll be here ten more days and then that'll be it. We move into the new apartment that will never be ours April Fool's Day. The weekend before actually but that's close enough for us fools.

MARCH
23

Back to school for us. Boob was whinola this morning before we left but as soon as we got inside she was running around like she owned the place again. Everyone who likes me was glad to see me. I asked Katherine and Whitney and Susie and everybody, but nobody had heard anything from Lori. Her parents must and Kure-A-Kid must keep her lidded pretty good. Whitney said she had tried to find out from
Tom what was going on but no go. Lori's parents hired an answering service and it's impossible to get through direct anymore. She said she left two messages but they must burn them.

None of the teachers said anything about Lori being gone. I asked Miss Wisegarver if she'd heard anything from her, Lori was always a favorite of hers. ‘Take your seat, Lola' was all she said just like I hadn't said anything and like Lori never existed. It was creepy strange. I don't know why they're acting so funny like that about Lori, it wasn't like she'd done anything that bad. Maybe Kure-A-Kid has something to do with the way they're acting. If someone goes there then they don't exist anymore.

That wasn't the strangest thing today though, Anne. What was most weird was that Boob and me were home hours before Daddy. He started working at nine because the boss Mister Mossbacher wanted him to come in early on his first day. Daddy said he found his being there so useful that now he wants Daddy to come in early every day though he still won't get off until six. Daddy'll be working Monday through Friday. He gets half an hour for lunch. Even me and Boob get an hour! Daddy says he thinks the job will be all right but he doesn't seem excited about it. We asked him what he did and he said he was on bag check all afternoon because three of the people who should have been there didn't show up and Mister Mossbacher didn't want him to handle money downstairs until there were enough people upstairs to watch out for shoplifters.

Daddy must have looked everywhere before he found this job. I took out a box of paper trash this afternoon when I got home that Mama had gotten from their bedroom. On top were copies of a hundred letters he sent out to places asking about jobs. I asked Mama if those were places that didn't answer him. ‘It's very tough times sweetie' said Mama ‘and certain to get tougher all the time.'

Boob was all kissy with Daddy when he got home and I was too but in my own way. We seemed to make him feel a
lot better. I don't mind giving him some sympathy but it spoils somebody if that's all you do, I think. Mama and Boob say I'm being very cruel but Daddy agrees with me, or at least he has in the past. He might feel different today. He's fudging when he says he likes his new job, I can tell.

MARCH
24

They killed the President today so they let us out of school early. They shot him while he was going from a building to his car. I didn't like him but he was the President so I should feel sad they said at school but I don't really. The new President is the guy everybody always makes fun of. ‘Oh my angel all any of them know how to do is play golf it's such a horror' Mama said. Mama also said that when President Kennedy was assassinated everybody was sad but nobody else seemed especially sad today either so I guess I'm not the only one.

It's hard enough to keep packing this week now that Daddy's working and Boob and me are back in class. We can only do it at night pretty much and so I just want to warn you Anne you'll probably suffer this week because I think I'm going to be too tired to write much, especially if the other nights are like this one. Not that we were moving anything heavy or anything else really bad happened, but there's just so much stuff.

Before they told us the President had been shot I saw Katherine. She was crying at lunch today. I thought someone had done something mean to her again, but they hadn't it was just me moving away. ‘But I'll still see you all the time' I said. ‘At school and you can come over anytime.' ‘You'll be so far away' she said. ‘Don't be silly I'm just across town' I said. ‘It's dangerous over there' she said. ‘Who says?' ‘My mom and dad' she said. ‘They told me I couldn't stay over with you any more after you moved.' ‘Because it's too dangerous? But it's not' I said though as I told you Anne the new neighborhood isn't nearly as nice as
ours. ‘That's what they say. You're my only real friend now that Lori's been sent up what am I going to do?' ‘Can I stay over with you sometimes?' ‘Maybe' Katherine said. ‘Well it seems only fair' I said. She said she'd ask her parents. I really don't like her father so I wish there was some way she could stay over at the new apartment but if that's the only way it works then that's it. She was feeling better when lunch was over and I was glad to cheer her up.

Boob and me asked Daddy how work went today and he said smoothly enough. Mister Mossbacher showed him everything about how the deposits were supposed to be dropped off and made out and how to work out everyone's schedule when half of the people there are absent, which is often the case it seems. Daddy was lying down on the couch half the night instead of packing because he had to help carry in a two-hundred-box shipment of plastic bags.

On the news tonight the new President said there's no reason for anyone to worry about the situation. He didn't say which situation.

MARCH
25

School was closed today in memoriam of the President and will be closed tomorrow too for his funeral. Daddy has to go to work though. Excelsior never closes except on Thanks-giving and Christmas thanks to Mister Mossbacher. I'm not sorry I don't have to go to school.

Forgive me Anne for stopping here but I'm just too tired tonight. I'll write you a little more tomorrow night I promise.

MARCH
26

They buried the President a day sooner than they usually do because they couldn't secure the Capitol enough to let him lie in state. That's when they put the casket in the rotunda and everybody comes to see him. While we
watched the funeral today Mama said she remembered with Kennedy they had a long line of limousines and a horse with empty boots and they were drumming on drums all day. This time they just drove out to the cemetery and buried him because of security. The new President gave a speech and said he doesn't plan on doing anything differently than the President because absolutely nothing is wrong. ‘They'll shoot him too next week then and not a minute too soon if that's the way he feels' Mama said.

MARCH
27

Now that the President's buried it's like it never happened. Nobody said anything and there's nothing on TV about it anymore, it's all about the emergencies again. School had to close early this afternoon today even though it was our first day back and again Anne I can't say I'm sorry at all. What happened was that smoke from Long Island blew back over the river and came in through the ventilation ducts so thick it was getting foggy in class plus it smelled bad. It looked like there was a thunderstorm over there the clouds were so dark and went up so high. We weren't doing anything in class today this morning anyway just trying to catch up on what we hadn't done.

Even though I'm sleepy let me try to catch you up on what else is down. First of all some sort of good news. Katherine told me she asked her mom and dad if I could stay overnight with her sometime at their apartment. They said they'd let her know once they thought about it. Why they'd have to think about it like it's the end of the world if I stay over I don't know but they're just like that. Katherine said it was good though because at least they didn't say no right away. Usually they do when she asks them if she can do something.

Mama acts like she's having a good time checking those manuscripts though she's about finished with the first batch she got. She says she hopes to get some more early next
week though the people she knows at the publishers weren't sure how many more they'd have for her right away. ‘Darling I'm ready to work like a slave if they'll just have me' she said. I like it when she's working because then she doesn't have to take as much medication even if lots of other things like moving are going on.

Daddy's new job is going okay too he says. Daddy also says he remembers why he was so glad he left bookstores when he did. That sounded fishy so I asked him ‘How could you ever forget if you hated it so much?' and then he admitted he was exaggerating. He says the people they hire as cashiers have to be taught how to add before they can work at the counter. Daddy's not even sure that everyone who works in the bookstore can read. ‘How did they get the job then?' I asked and Daddy just said Mister Moss-bacher likes to give people a chance. Daddy said he's sure half the people who work there can't write their names, only print them. He says he guesses this is typical these days. Can you believe it Anne?

Boob said she had a headache and Mama stuffed her with baby aspirin and sent her on to bed right after dinner. ‘Sweetie go tuck in your sister and make sure she doesn't need anything else' Mama said. ‘What do you need?' I asked Boob when I came in. She was under the covers with My L'il Fetus glued on her. ‘Don't need a thing except take this vise off my head' she said. ‘What vise?' I asked. ‘The one you put on my head when I wasn't looking' she said. ‘Shut up Boob and go to sleep I just wanted to know how you were doing' I said. ‘Doing fine good night' she said. She sounded a lot like me when she said that I thought. Anyway then after I took a shower and said goodnight to Mama and Daddy I came here to write you. I'm lying on my bed writing this Anne. It isn't too comfortable but there're all these boxes stacked on top of the desk like a barricade. If Boob was on the other side I could pour boiling oil on top of her.

So this is our last night in our house and I can at least tell
you how I really feel. I haven't told Boob or Mama or Daddy because I know they're having their own troubles about all this. Tonight at dinner Mama said ‘Oh my angel please tell me are you doing okay?' ‘No prob what's to be done about it anyway?' I said. ‘Sweetie there's so much can be done and we'll do it' Mama said. ‘All we can do right now is move so we'll do that and see what happens next' I said. Mama says I'm a pessimist but I don't think I am, I think I just don't see any need to fudge if I'm telling myself what's down.

I'm so sad Anne because I don't think we will ever come back here. According to them of course there's no reason to think that. But I just have this hunch and usually whenever I have hunches I'm usually right. I wish this time I wasn't and maybe I won't be, but like I told Mama what's to be done?

It's supposed to be a pretty day tomorrow at least, so we won't get rained on. Daddy is off this weekend, though now he's not sure how long that'll last. Mister Mossbacher told him he'd be off on weekends but Daddy thinks he's going to change his mind and if he does Daddy will have to do what he's told. Daddy hates that even worse than I do.

Night night Anne. I'll talk to you in the new place tomorrow.

MARCH
29

Here I try to be good and write you every day and look what happens. I didn't write you yesterday Anne because we didn't finish moving in until late. Moving was just so much more complicated and scary than we'd have ever guessed. I hope we go on better than we started.

To save money Daddy found an ad in the
Voice
and hired this fellow named VanMan. That's what he calls himself because he moves people in the van he drives. Anyway we were ready to go at nine o'clock yesterday morning but VanMan didn't show. Daddy called twice
from the lobby and got VanMan's machine both times. We disconnected our phone in the apartment so we could transfer the number and so the new guy moving in could get his own phone. Anyway VanMan finally showed up at eleven thirty. I could hardly keep from laughing out loud when I first saw him and Boob was giggling so hard she couldn't stop. He was this ugly old hippie Anne and he was wearing a Grateful Dead T-shirt. Our doorman wouldn't have ever let him even sleep in the gutter in front of our building because he was too bummy. Daddy said he was late and VanMan said he'd hit a bad flow.

So he helped us carry the boxes and chairs out of the lobby and then he put everything in his old van. I never would have thought it held so much but it did even though toward the end VanMan started shoving things in where they wouldn't fit and we could hear stuff breaking. Daddy said be careful and VanMan said hey dude it's just settling. We decided we should go on. He was going to have to make two runs because we had to come back for the couch and our beds. Mama and Boob took a taxi over to the new apartment but I asked if I could ride with Daddy and VanMan. My mistake.