Random Acts of Senseless Violence (11 page)

I saw Katherine at lunch today and she told me great news. She says her parents said it was okay for me to stay over there. We agreed that Friday night would be good to try. She's going to doublecheck to make sure it's a done. If I do stay over I won't be writing you that night Anne, so I'll warn you now. I asked Mama and Daddy if it was okay and they said it was fine.

Mama got more manuscripts today but only a couple. She says they're short ones and it won't take her but a few hours and as she gets paid by the hour that's not so good. ‘Sweeties I'll read as slow as I can though to try and boondoggle my time' she said. She's already finished one tonight though so I don't think she can doggle much longer.

In case you wondered Anne the trip home takes as long
in the afternoon as it does in the morning. Tomorrow I'll see if Boob wants to walk after school and how far. Maybe we can go through the park before we catch the bus. She'll probably feeb out though or else it'll rain. Something will happen I'm sure of that.

Nothing else for now Anne. I'm very tired and achy but I can't get to sleep. It's so noisy over here and I don't think I'm ever going to get used to it. Last night someone outside the window on the street was screaming for ten minutes until I heard glass break and then they didn't scream anymore.

MARCH
31

Granny's back already! I had cramps yesterday but I convinced myself it wasn't time for her to return already. I was wrong though. Mama asked me why I was so grumpy yesterday and now we know. ‘Oh sweetie it must be the stress' she said. ‘I don't know what it is' I said. ‘If I was still beset with it I'm sure the same would happen to me but I'm just an old dried out husk of myself now' Mama said. ‘No you're not' I said. ‘My angel you may not think so but I must be' Mama said.

So we didn't walk back this afternoon after all. I wasn't up to it and I knew something would happen and it did. We got to the bus stop early this morning and wouldn't you know it there was no problem. The buses showed up when they were supposed to and we got to school a half hour early. It was all right just the same. I saw Katherine before we went to class. She said her dad said it would be okay if I stayed over Friday night. We're both looking forward to it. The big news at school today was that Icky Betsy had to go to the hospital. Apparently she must have heaved so much during Spring break that she tossed up something she needed. She's at Lenox Hill and we sent her a card that everyone signed. Maybe she'll be treated now but probably not.

Something happened at work today that got Daddy upset but he wouldn't say what it was. He was so quiet all through dinner, it was very bothersome because that's just not like him. Boob started playing with her food and singing silly songs and he smiled but that was all. We asked him what was the matter and he said nothing. He's more than fudging, he's lying. ‘I don't know what happened sweetie but I have the idea someone was unpleasant to him I don't know who' Mama said when I asked if he'd said anything to her.

We watched TV while we ate. We don't have cable here and the reception's bad but we can get channels 4, 7 and 13 without too many ghosts. There were riots in Brooklyn again last night and then this morning too. What's even worse because it's closer is that they think there're going to be riots in Harlem and Washington Heights too and that's right next to us up here. The Mayor says that the Army has to come in if that happens because the National Guard is too busy in Queens and Long Island and upstate too. The President says he can't bring any more soldiers back to America to take care of problems local police and the Guard should be able to handle here. They said two thousand people have been killed in Los Angeles last week. Daddy said he hoped some of them were people he knew.

As if it's not noisy enough around here there's something else we've all discovered tonight Anne. Tonight about an hour ago just as I was getting ready to start writing you we suddenly heard this recorded voice blaring. At first we couldn't tell what it was saying because it was speaking Spanish and then Creole. Then the voice started speaking English saying ‘Warning Warning Warning You Have Violated This Building's Perimeters Please Leave Immediately Or Response Will Be Called For.' Then it started in Spanish again. It's as loud as a jet at the airport and it went on for fifteen minutes before it finally stopped. Daddy thinks it's an alarm for the co-op across the street where they have
the security guards out front all night. Why they need that alarm unless it's to keep the guards awake is beyond me. Anyway this is just one more obnoxious noise to drive us all crazy.

APRIL
1

We moved back to our apartment today and I got all As in my tests last week. April Fool to you Anne! I did get As though in everything but algebra and that was a B minus. I hate algebra and all math.

When Boob and I left the building this morning we saw somebody wrote
EARTH IS HELL
on the side in big white letters. Probably that stupid alarm kept whoever wrote it awake too. It went off three more times last night going Warning Warning Warning and woke me up every time. I can hardly keep my eyes open while I'm writing you.

This afternoon when we got back from school we walked over to the co-op and saw a new sign on the wire around the building saying
ALARMED.
Daddy was right about who the culprits are. The building's not any different from the one we're in but it's fixed up more so it's not like it's River House or the Dakota or anything. The day guard was out front. He's this little skinny Indian guy. ‘Why does the alarm have to make so much noise?' I asked him. He told me and Boob to leave immediately or response would be called for. ‘What response are you talking about I was just asking' I said. He had a gun and he started patting it like it was his buddy. I was almost as tall as he was but he could tell I'm not a murderer or anything. I could tell he scared Boob though so I walked away and pushed her ahead of me. I looked back and he actually looked like he wanted to shoot! What were we going to do Anne, tease him to death? When we got across the street some of the Spanish guys standing around outside the grocery store started whistling at me and saying hey culo culo which means my vagina I think. That really pissed me but I didn't say anything.
There's no point, it won't make the toads stop croaking.

The halls in this building smell like lentils cooking all the time and I hate lentils. People pee in the entrance too and it smells like the subway. This morning it was so bad I nearly heaved and my eyes burned. ‘It's like walking into Saks and having them squirt you' Boob said but of course it's much worse than that.

Daddy was in a better mood today so I think nothing happened too serious yesterday. Mama finished those manuscripts though and now she's waiting for more and in the meantime she's back on Prozac. She left the bottle out in the bathroom this morning. We only have one bathroom here so it means one of us is always waiting for the others. Tonight Daddy was in there so long I had to go downstairs and pee in the entrance myself.

April Fool! I'd never do that.

APRIL
2

This commuting is killing me, Anne. I don't think I'll ever get enough sleep again. The buses were late and we had to run all the way from 86th down to Brearley and we just made it as the bell rang.

Mama Prozacked out tonight so Daddy unthawed dinner. When I was helping him clean up I saw that his shirt had a hole burned in it and I asked him what happened. Daddy said a customer came into the store this morning smoking a cigarette even though it's against the law. If Mister Mossbacher sees someone smoking on the street or in his store Daddy says he starts screaming until he's scared everybody to death. Mister Mossbacher was right up front dusting underneath the cash registers so Daddy told the man he'd have to put out his cigarette. The man flipped it against Daddy and then stomped out. Daddy put it out before Mister Mossbacher saw it because otherwise I think he'd have screamed at Daddy. He said the man was wearing a nice suit and looked perfectly normal but you can
never tell who's psycho and who's not.

The rioters attacked an armory in Brooklyn last night and took it over. The Mayor was on TV telling everybody who lives over there what to do to protect their homes while they're out rioting. He's got police guarding the bridges and subways to make sure they don't all come over here. I don't like where we live but I'd rather live here than Brooklyn. The President told the Mayor he wasn't going to be able to send in the Army to Brooklyn because of the situation in Washington, not to mention everywhere else.

There goes Warning Warning Warning again. That's the eighth time today since I got home. I think the guards set it off deliberately just to make it seem like they're busy.

APRIL
4

Now that I'm back Anne I have to tell you what happened last night over at Katherine's.

Everything started out like it was going to be a wonderful time. After school Katherine and I walked down 86th and first we stopped for slices of pizza. Granny's almost gone but I'm still constant starving and I had to get something. Then we went in Elk Candy and each of us bought a marzipan fish to eat later. We aimed to cruise but there were gangs of older kids roaming and they looked like they were ready to wolf and we didn't want to be surrounded so we flew.

We went back to her apartment. Katherine's parents weren't home yet so we sat in the living room and listened to tapes on the good player. At five she started getting nervy and said we better stop because they'd be home soon and she didn't want them to catch us. ‘Catch us what?' I asked. ‘Doing anything in here' Katherine said. Well as it turned out her mother didn't get home until almost six. She fixed us Lean Cuisines in the microwave. We hadn't eaten dinner because we were still full of pizza. I had chicken cacciatore and Katherine had chicken amandine. They were awful but I've had worse.

‘How are your classes Lola?' her mother asked me. ‘Fine' I said. ‘Do you like your teachers?' ‘Very much' I said which isn't
true
true but close enough. ‘Looking forward to summer?' ‘A lot' I said. ‘Going anywhere?' she asked but then she answered herself before I could. ‘Oh you wouldn't be would you' she said. Then she didn't say anything else to me the rest of the evening. It was like she'd done her duty and she could get back to the real world.

Katherine's father came home at eight. He works late every night Katherine said and I know she wishes he worked later. He looked at me when he walked in but he didn't say hello, he just went into the kitchen. Katherine and her mother got even edgier when he came in. Pretty soon we went to her room and she shut the door. ‘I'd lock it but it won't' she said. She lay down on the bed and sighed like she was going to cry. ‘What's the matter?' I asked. ‘Nothing' she said and so I dropped it knowing she wouldn't answer. Katherine turned on her stereo but kept the sound down. Her father hates any sort of noise and so her mother and Katherine get so quiet that you can hear pins drop if they're all in the same room. They're the jumpiest bunch I know.

We sat on her bed looking at Seventeen magazines. ‘Would you wear that?' she asked every three minutes. Every time I looked she'd show me some doof wearing a topless bikini or leather chaps or silver eye shadow. ‘Never in a million years would you?' I'd say. ‘Maybe' she said. ‘Well go ahead.' ‘When are you moving back over here?' ‘I don't know soon I hope' I said. ‘Is it really slummy over there?' ‘Not really you have to come visit' I said. ‘I told you they won't let me' she said. ‘Sneak over after school.' ‘You sound like Lori.' ‘I do not.' ‘You do you won't admit it. They're right you know she was a bad influence' she said. ‘She didn't influence you' I said. ‘She tried.' ‘How?' ‘Trying to get me to stay out later than I should. Shoplifting. If I was ever caught doing anything bad' Katherine started to say but she didn't finish. ‘She tried that all the time with me
but if I didn't want to I'd say no use and she'd let up' I said. ‘You're meaner than I am' Katherine said. ‘Lori's meaner than both of us put together' I said. ‘She could be sometimes but you're pretty equal' Katherine said. ‘We're not' I said and wrestled her down. All at once she got real worried but we weren't making any noise not enough to hear anyway. ‘Stop please stop' Katherine said and I did. She'd have never said that if we'd been in my room.

‘What else did she try to teach you?' I asked. ‘How to drink a beer it was so gro' Katherine said. ‘She taught me how to kiss I knew already but she wanted to show me' I said. ‘How'd she show you?' ‘She kissed me.' ‘On the mouth?' ‘Yes and she tried to use her tongue but I wouldn't let her' I said. ‘She tried to use her tongue?' Katherine asked. ‘Well Lori's got such a big mouth it has to go somewhere' I said.

‘What was it like was it okay?' Katherine asked. ‘Since there weren't tongues involved it was all right' I said. ‘Show me' she said and sat up with her face near mine. ‘Pucker up' I said and I kissed her. She sat there like she was tasting something she'd never eaten before. ‘It lasts longer if it's with a boy isn't it?' she asked. ‘Hours longer like for days because they're brushing each other's teeth with their tongues' I said. ‘
Lo!
' Katherine said looking disgusted. ‘Kiss longer so I can see what it's like' she said. ‘No tongues' I said. ‘Okay.' We kissed longer and it was nice but that was all. She smiled. ‘How was that?' I asked. ‘One more time just one' she said. ‘Kat you're bad' I said. ‘I'm not I just want to know what it's like' she said. ‘Can't you tell?' I asked. ‘Please.' ‘Oh all right.'