Random Acts of Senseless Violence (6 page)

‘How do you know?' I asked. ‘Because I know' Whitney said. “You weren't ever in one' Icky Betsy said. ‘No but I've read about people who were and heard stories.' ‘Why do they sharpen the buckles?' I asked. ‘Because when you wake up in the night and have to go to the bathroom you not only cut yourself when you try to sit up then you're pinned down' she said. ‘How do you go to the bathroom?' Icky Betsy asked. ‘You don't they electrify the bed springs and when you pee you get electrocuted.' ‘You don't know that' I said. ‘I do' she said. ‘Then everybody would die' Tanya said. ‘It's not a strong electrocution just enough to hurt' Whitney says. I still don't think she knows what she's talking about.

Daddy came home from Los Angeles this afternoon. Me and Mama and Boob were so glad to see him. He brought necklaces he bought for us, pretty gold strands. They're not real gold I don't think. We put them on right away and of course five minutes later Boob's fell off and she lost it. We found it though. At dinner he talked about his trip but mainly about how everyone was handling the riots. I asked if his producers ever came out from under their desks and he said they did. They think the air force should bomb the neighborhoods, Daddy said. He didn't think that was a good idea. On TV they said that's what they were thinking about doing though so I bet they do. We asked if they bought his movie and he didn't say they did. He said it was under consideration but that almost always means no. He didn't act like he was sad or anything but he was fudging. Daddy was real jetlagged and he went to bed early tonight.

Then a really bad thing happened Anne. I tried calling
Lori's house. Her mother picked up the phone and when I told her it was me she said I wasn't allowed to talk to Lori anymore. ‘Why not?' I said but she hung up on me. ‘That's so incredibly rude my darling let me take care of this' Mama said when I told her. An hour later she called Lori's house. When Mama got off the phone she told me what was going on.

‘She said she was sorry for hanging up on you sweetie but it's what she's been told to do' Mama said. ‘Who told her?' I asked. ‘The toughlove goons angel they say when a child enters their programs they have to stop talking to all their friends because it's impossible to tell which one led them astray' she said. ‘I never did' I said. ‘Oh sweetie I know but that's what they tell them to do.' ‘She can't even talk to Katherine?' ‘No angel no you're all heathens in their eyes.' ‘That's not fair.' ‘No angel' Mama said. ‘Can she talk to us when she gets out?' ‘I don't know sweetie I gather they give you such a brainwashing in those places you don't even know who you are anymore.' ‘Lori may not ever talk to me again because she did something her parents didn't like?' I asked. Mama nodded. ‘That's not right' I said. ‘No sweetie' said Mama.

I tried to call Katherine again but naturally nobody answered the phone. I didn't even leave a message this time. After Boob went beddybye Mama told me Daddy said it doesn't look like anything's going to sell anytime soon. We'll have to figure out something else to get by. ‘What kind of something else?' I asked but Mama didn't say.

MARCH
13

Friday the 13 th has always been my lucky day Anne and this was no exception. This morning I took my Music test and zipped right through it. Now it's finally Spring break! Hooray!

Then I hadn't been home five minutes when Lori called!
Her father was at work and her mother went to the bank. Her brother Tom let her call me because he thought it was bone that she wasn't allowed to talk to anyone. ‘Are you all right?' I asked her. ‘No' ‘When are you leaving?' ‘Tomorrow morning I'm scared' ‘How long are you there?' ‘Six weeks' ‘Can you talk to me when you get back?' ‘I better' she said. Then her mother came home and she hung up before her mother could tell that she was on the phone with anyone. I wish I could have said goodbye but we didn't have time.

Mama said the name of the place they're sending her to is the Kure-A-Kid Rehab 12 Step Center in Upper Mont-clair, New Jersey. ‘Will they shave her head?' I asked Mama. ‘Probably something terrible like that sweetie they're nothing but concentration camps with video games from everything I've read.' ‘You and Daddy wouldn't ever send me to one would you?' ‘Oh my darling never never in a million years no matter how awful you were' she said. I'm sort of curious as to what one of those camps is like but I wouldn't want to have to go to one.

Boob was sitting there fiddling with her My Li'l Fetus. It lost one of its arms somehow. She kept getting up and looking in the refrigerator. ‘What are you doing Boob?' I asked. ‘I'm looking for Lori on milk cartons' she said. ‘She came home already they're not putting her on milk cartons' I said. ‘Maybe the one they've got's an impostor' Boob said. ‘You're crazy Boob' ‘How are they brainwashing her?' Boob asked. ‘They're changing her sweetie' Mama said. ‘How?' ‘I don't know' Mama said. ‘Are they washing her brain with soap or detergent?' ‘Shut up Boob' I said. ‘They're sticking her head in the washing machine' Boob said and laughed. ‘Lori's in the spin dryer.' ‘It's not funny Boob' I said. ‘My darlings you're both such funsters' Mama said. Then she made us go in the living room so she could finish dinner.

Boob hopped up in Daddy's lap when he came out of his study and sat down. That was always fun. I've gotten much
too big for that now, I'm almost as tall as he is. He hugged us. Things could be better, he told us, but the weekend's here at least and we should really enjoy ourselves. Boob squealed like a piggy and I was glad too but Daddy seems so sad. He's not telling us what's really going on. I don't know if I want to know. But he's right the weekend's here and Spring break too.

MARCH
14

Today should have been a great day Anne but it wasn't. This morning I was the first one up as usual. The phone rang and I answered it on the first ring. I thought Lori might have gotten away long enough to call me again but it wasn't Lori.

It was a man from Guaranteed Credit Associates. He had a voice that sounded like he had a mouth full of rocks. The first thing he said was when were we paying? ‘You want to speak to my parents' I said. No I want to speak to you he said. Why aren't you in temple? ‘We don't practice' I said. ‘Let me get my father.' Do you like where you're living? he asked. ‘Of course I do' I said. If your parents don't pay their bills we can put you in a foster home he said. ‘You cannot' I said. We can he said we'll put you in a foster home and you won't see your parents or brothers or sisters ever again. ‘I don't have a brother' I said. You know what happens to little girls in foster homes? he asked. I hung up. The phone rang again and I knew it was him again but I answered because I didn't want him to wake Mama and Daddy up. They're raped he said little girls are raped in foster homes your parents better pay their bills. Daddy picked up the phone in their room and I heard him say Who is this? and then I hung up. I heard him yelling and then I heard him slam the phone down so hard I thought he broke it. Mama came out of their room right after that. I was sitting on the couch.

‘Oh sweetie what did he say to you?' Mama asked.
‘Nothing' I said and I should have told her what he said but I didn't. ‘Look at me sweetie what did that awful man say to you?' ‘Pay the bills' I said. ‘He didn't say anything else was he threatening?' I shook my head. I don't know why I didn't tell her what he said about being raped in a foster home. The way he said it made me feel real bad and I bet that's what he used to do to girls in the foster homes he was in. Mama hugged me and said she was so so sorry. ‘Why don't you declare bankruptcy?' I asked. ‘Oh my darling if we did that again we'd lose everything this time we couldn't' Mama said. ‘Then they'll keep calling' I said. ‘Michael took the phone off the hook sweetie they won't call again this morning let us answer the phone from now on' Mama said. ‘Okay' I said.

She went back to their bedroom and shut the door behind her. I heard them yelling but I didn't want to listen. I turned on the radio and listened to music for a while. Boob woke up and came out and started doing silly dances. ‘I'm hiphopping' she kept saying. ‘Bad enough.' ‘That's not rap it's classical music' I said. ‘Get down I'm Rap Queen Cheryl Cherifah' Boob said and she kept dancing until she finally collapsed on the floor. She's recovered completely.

Then Mama came back out and fixed breakfast. We had toasted English muffins with strawberry jam and glasses of milk. After breakfast we got dressed. ‘We'll have a wonderful time today my geese we'll ignore the cares of this cruel world.' Then Daddy came out and it looked like he and Mama had made up because they were hugging each other like always. Daddy put his hand on my shoulder and said he was sorry. ‘It's all right' I said. It wasn't though. What the credit guy said really bothered me but there wasn't anything Daddy could do about it. Nobody is going to put us in a foster home. I wouldn't go even if they forced me.

Before we went out Mama put the phone back on the hook. It started ringing as we were going out the door.
Daddy answered it in case it was anybody he was waiting to hear from but it wasn't. It was the credit guy again and Daddy hung up.

We went for a walk through the park. It really was a beautiful day today. We went to the Met and saw the exhibit of Moorish art that's going on there. Boob was well behaved but then she always is when we go to museums. I looked around at the other people visiting the museum and wondered if they were having as bad a time as we were. Most of them looked like they were but you can never tell.

We went upstairs to the roof garden. Everybody there was over by the part of the balcony that's closest to Fifth Avenue. Down the side streets and over the buildings we saw big clouds of black smoke coming up from Brooklyn and Queens. The sky was dark like it gets before a bad storm. Nobody could see anything but everybody was looking. We saw flames that looked like fireflies they were so far away from us. ‘What is it?' Boob asked. The civil disturbances a man said. They're animals someone else said they oughta blast them. ‘Is that thunder?' Boob asked. Guns, Daddy said. Cannons and mortar someone said. The Army will have to come in if the Guard can't handle it another man said. They can't a woman said. ‘A civil disturbance is a riot, isn't it?' I asked. Depends, Daddy said. When they said there wouldn't be any riots here I knew they didn't know what they were talking about. ‘What are they rioting about?' Boob asked. Everything, Daddy said. Our eyes started stinging so we went back inside.

We had lunch at the coffee shop at Madison and 82nd. I've never heard us be so quiet before. It was the oddest thing Anne, we were quiet like we were still in the museum. I didn't feel like talking myself. I guess no one did, not even Boob. Then we walked down Madison as far as 59th looking at all the stores going out of business. I couldn't remember what half of them used to be and I was almost afraid I had Alzheimer's since I couldn't remember. Mama wished she could still go to Bloomingdale's. You couldn't hear the guns
and cannon from where we were on the street because of the traffic. The smoke blew over Manhattan. It got dark like it was going to rain big black drops so we decided to go home.

We rode the bus back. It was crowded. We stood by the back door where we could get on and off fast. I'm
GLAD GLAD GLAD
we did because at 72nd a crazy man got on. There're crazy men all over but this one was really scary Anne. When he first got on he looked like anybody except the bottoms of his pants legs were torn and muddy and he had a big runny pimple on one cheek that was disgusting. He was five feet away from us. Boob was singing more silly songs to herself and Daddy told her not to attract attention. All of a sudden the crazy man started hitting a little old lady, she was sitting in one of the single seats. She was screaming and he knocked her glasses off and her mouth was bleeding. She hadn't said a word to him, he just picked her out. Mama and Daddy put their arms around us and pushed back against the people standing behind us. The people on the bus grabbed the crazy man and he started hitting them too. The bus driver pulled the bus over and stopped. We buzzed getting off then once we were safe we stopped to watch what happened. A cop car was already there. The cops got on the bus and a few minutes later dragged the crazy man out. They hit him with their clubs. Then Anne this man on the street wearing a suit saw what was going on and he ran over and kicked the crazy man in the head as hard as he could. Boob started crying. People on the street applauded like it was a movie. The cops pushed the man in the suit away and picked up the crazy man and threw him in the back of their car. It was all over then so we left. We walked home and it was such a weird day, we all went to our rooms and shut the doors like we'd been bad. I lay down on my bed and just wanted to go to sleep and I did take a nap. The phone rang a few times and Daddy got it every time but I don't know if it was the credit guy or not.

We watched the news later and naturally there was
nothing about the crazy man on the bus who almost killed everybody. They wouldn't let news helicopters fly over Brooklyn and Queens so none of the reporters could say what was going on. The Mayor said everything was under control. ABC news showed the President at his vacation house. Some people on TV said he hasn't been President long enough to know what he's doing but I think he's on Xanax.

If Lori hadn't been sent to Kure-A-Kid I'm sure we'd have spent the day together having loads of fun. I wish we hadn't had that argument. I wish I'd talked to her more. Now I think I'll never get to talk to her again but maybe I will. It's hard to tell, you hear so many stories about what they do to people and what happens when you're not the same person anymore.