Reasons I Fell for the Funny Fat Friend (11 page)

BOOK: Reasons I Fell for the Funny Fat Friend
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Just like that, we’re holdin’ hands. And damn it if I ever let her go.

 

 

 

 

Reason
13:
I’d beat the crap out of my own flesh and blood for you

 

“Hey ma!” My voice is muffled by all the clothes in my hamper, but Mom hears me.

“What is it?”

I look through the basket again before I yell back up the stairs. “You seen my blue shirt?”

“You have a lot of blue shirts, hun.”

Ugh. “You know the long sleeved one with the writing on the arm?”

She doesn’t yell back, but I hear her footsteps move to the laundry room and the dryer door swing open.

“It’s up here!”

“Will you toss it down?”

I wait to hear the soft thud on the floor outside my room before going out there. Yeah, Mom’s not catchin’ me half naked.

Normally
I wouldn’t care about what
kind of shirt I’m wearin’, but tonight… yeah, first date with the girl I like and her first date period. Better do my best to look like I care while lookin’ like I don’t care.

It’s harder than it sounds.

The doorbell rings just as I’m tuggin’ my belt on. If that girl came here instead of lettin’ me pick her up, I’m gonna—

“Quynn!”

Ah hell.

“Hi Terri.” Quynn’s voice hits me in the stomach. I’m goin’ to
crap
myself. What is she doin’ here?

“Come in, come in.”

Their footsteps go right to the living room and then the couch creaks as they sit. I take out my cell. Damn it, I’m already runnin’ late. Maybe I can crawl out my window.

“Is Brody here?”

In the words of Hayley… how freakin’ pooptastic! How did I space Quynn was planning on seein’ me tonight? Oh that’s right, I’ve been Hayley obsessed. And now I’m stuck. Gotta bail on Quynn…
yeah,
she said she was comin’ over to see Mom, and even though it sounds cocky as hell, I know she’s here to see me too.

Cell’s still in my hand, and I fumble around the keyboard as I try to type Hayles a quick text.

Sry I’m late. I’m comin’ I promise. Don’t u dare start walkin’ over here. I’ll text u when I’m close.

Yeah, the last thing I need is for Hayles to show up and see me, Mom, and Quynn talkin’ like it’s some sort of messed up book
club or somethin’. The image
makes my palms sweat.

It’s so lame.

“Hey, Quynn’s here. Come talk with us.”

Yeah, lame isn’t a strong enough word.

“I can’t.”
Damn
it
, I just snapped at my mom. Now she’ll know—

“What’s wrong?”

I sigh. “Nothin’. I’m running late.”

“Where are you going?”

“Out.”

Tucking my wallet into my back pocket, I try to walk past her, but she blocks me, crossing her arms over her waist in that ‘Don’t talk to me that way’ mother stance.

“Brody, you tell me what’s going on right now, or you’re not going anywhere.”

Ugh. I don’t talk girls with Mom. She’s biased. She doesn’t say it out loud, but I know she wants Quynn and me to…

Yeah, I don’t talk girls with Mom.

But I’m honest with my parents.

“I’ve got a date.”

Her arms drop. “Oh.”

Yeah, that’s all she says.

“Can you tell Quynn I’m sorry
,
and I’ll see her in school?”

Her lips purse together for a second before she says, “You can tell her yourself. You have to walk past her anyway.”

She turns to head upstairs, but pauses, hand resting on the handrail. “Is it Hayley?”

I sigh again. Mom’s more observant than I thought. And I have been spendin’ a lot of time with Hayles lately. “It’s her birthday.”

“Oh, okay.” Her voice turns upbeat and her smile goes back on her face. I wish that didn’t bug me
,
but it does. What if it wasn’t Hayles’ birthday? Why does she care so much about who I decide to date?

Guess I should rephrase. Why does she care so much that I want to date Hayley? I have a guess, but I don’t want to even think it, ‘cause it’ll make me sound like a big dick.

“Tell her I say Happy Birthday.”

“I will.” I reach over and grab my set of car keys off my dresser. “You okay if I…?”

“Yup, just be careful. And put some gas in it when you’re done.”

Yeah, I’ll have to do that anyway since I’m sure Mom left it on fumes.

I nod
,
and we both head upstairs, my heart going faster with each step. I
don’t want to see Quynn’s face
or smell her citrusy and girly scent. It’ll just confuse the crap out of me, and I don’t want all that before I’m with Hayles.

Tonight has to be perfect for her, and I won’t think about another girl on our first date together. Hayles deserves more than that.

Ugh
, am I the right person to do this for her?

“Hey, Brody!”

“Oof!” For a tiny girl, she sure has a lot of force behind her hugs.

Wait… another hug. She’s gettin’ a lot more touchy feely with me. Is it all ‘cause of those two days I actually used those pointers Hayles gave me?

She pulls back, her face burning red as she tucks the loose strands of hair behind her ear. “Sorry, it feels like I haven’t seen you in forever.”

I chuckle. It comes out kind of shaky and dorky. “I saw you yesterday.”

“Yeah, but we didn’t talk. You were… busy.”

Awkward. Especially with Mom standing right here.

“Yeah, sorry. Been… preoccupied.”

Understatement. I’ve been obsessed. Followin’ Hayley around tryin’ to figure out what she likes so I can make this date good for her.

Quynn nods, grabs my hand and pulls me to the couch. I’m a douche, because I whip my hand from hers so hard, I can see it hurt her feelings.

“Sorry, I-I can’t stay and talk. Got a…” Why is the word not coming out?
Say it, Brody.
D-A-T-E.
It’s not hard.

“Got plans tonight.”

Yup, you’re a douche.

“Oh that’s right. Friday night is game night.” She taps her forehead with the heel of her hand. “Totally forgot.”

I should correct her. Mom walked out of the room
,
and I hear the blender going for whatever frilly drinks she’s makin’ for the two of them.

I shouldn’t lie.

But I do.

“Yup, so I gotta run.” I stand, wiping my sweaty palms on my jeans. “See ya, later?”

She gives me a big smile and nods. “Have fun.”

And I bolt out the door before I make more of an ass of myself.

I hate this. This isn’t how t
onight was supposed to start
. I’ve got a date with the most freakin’ awesome girl
,
and then Quynn shows up, messin’ with my head. Why is it so hard to tell her I’m with someone else?

Well, I’m not really with Hayley… but I want to be.

I kick the potted plant that has long ago died, knocking all the dirt and dead leaves on the lawn.

“What’s up your ass?”

It’s as if God knew I needed a punchin’ bag. Either that
,
or He thinks He’s real funny. Gabe takes a puff of his… nope that ain’t a cigarette, as he leans against Mom’s car.

“What
are you doin’ here?”

He shrugs and takes another drag, coughing before he talks. “Waitin’ for Mark to get home.”

Oh, so he’s waitin’ to get the
snot
beat out of him. Not that Dad would do that, but Dad’s the only person who hasn’t said one word to Gabe since the whole cheatin’ on his girl, movin’ out, and quittin’ his job thing.

And smokin’ pot isn’t going to help anything. He’s such an idiot.

“Well, move. I gotta go.”

He doesn’t.

“You’re leavin’?” He pauses to puff. “Thought you’d stay to get some action with my ex.”

My teeth snap shut
,
and I’m holding in all the crazy
stuff
goin’ on in my chest. “It’s not like that,” I growl. “I’m not like you and Dad, who’ll just bang anybody with more money than who they’re with.”

I know I hit a sore spot, but I don’t give a damn. Bringing up biological Daddy might knock some sense into my brother’s empty head.

But he just throws me a smirk.

“You know, you think I’m the bad guy, but if you just get your head out of your ass for a second, you’d get it. Why I did what I did.”

Whose head is in whose ass?

“Move.”

He shrugs again and steps away from the car. We don’t say a word as I get in and start the engine. Good. I don’t want any conversation with my douchebag brother to ruin this night with Hayles.

I’m ready to pull out, but Gabe sticks his face in the window. The weed smell is going to make me blow chunks all over his stupid grin.

“Have fun with the wide load.”

Hell no.

I’m not even thinking. Don’t care that I’m not thinking. The door swings open with so much force it knocks Gabe flat on his
butt
. Don’t know how I ge
t there, but I’m on top of him, punching his damn nose into his damn skull.

There’s a sick satisfaction to beating the shit out of my brother. Knowing I can is good, but everythin’ bothering me gets unleashed on him. Blow after blow, they sabotage my head and explode onto Gabe’s dumbass face. The stupid obsession I have over Quynn, the way I feel about Hayles and no one understanding why, including Hayley herself, what he did to our family, and just how stupid he is and how stupid I am for actin’ just like him. Dragging around two girls because I can’t make up my mind.

It’s then as I put another knuckle in his mouth that I catch a glimpse of the tatt I’ve got on my wrist. The one I got right after Gabe ran out. And even though I was supposed to help put Quynn back together, I
wanted
to put her back together, I was the one who fell apart. And she picked me up, dusted me off, and I…

Fell for another girl.

My arm stops mid-punch, and I stare into Gabe’s face which is now so bloody and swollen, I can barely tell he’s still smirking underneath it all.

“Brody?” Mom’s voice feels like a thousand jagged knives in my back. “G-Gabe?”

I know I shouldn’t look, but I do. My eyes flick to her and Quynn, standing on th
e porch, both with the same expression
on their faces.

I gotta get out of here.

Shaking, I shove off my brother and dive in the car. The tires squeal as I full throttle it down the road.

 

 

 

 

Reason 14
:
I
need
crave you

 

I’m late. Really late. First date for Hayles
,
and I’m beyond any excuse. But I have to sort out my head before I see her. Because I know once I’m with her, there will be little thought process.

I’m pulled over about a block away from her house, half expectin’ her to come skipping—no, she’d be stomping by this point—down the sidewalk and findin’ me here.

Is it wrong for me to like Hayley? To want her and not Quynn. Am I just as bad as Gabe and the dad I don’t normally claim? I stare at my tattoo again and trace the symbol, but that only reminds me of when Hayles did that in class a few days ago.

I wonder what she’d think about this. Say I was fallin’ for a different girl other than Hayles. Would she slap me and tell me to stay focused on Quynn
,
or would she tell me to go after the new girl?

Oh
dude
. I’m so dumb. Makin’ a big deal over this. I have no claim on Quynn. I
never
did. And she has no claim on me. I’m feelin’ guilty over something I haven’t done, but why? I’m figurin’ out what I want
before
makin’ a mess like my brother did.

And I want Hayley.

How could I want anyone else? She’s amazing, that girl.
Damn
sexy, funny, and just knows how to make me feel… all that crap you’re supposed to feel when you’re with the girl you just have to be around.

I need her.

No, I
crave
her.

And right now, I’m bein’ a real
jackhole
‘cause I’m over an hour late for her first date, not only with me, but ever.

Okay, Brody. Erase all that crap about Quynn, about Gabe, and just be with Hayles tonight. It’s
her
night.

It’s like I’m on auto
pilot
,
and I’m at her house without knowing how I got there. She’s sitting on her porch steps, picking the leaves off the bush next to her. Her hair is down. I’ve never seen it that way before. It’s so long, coming just under her boobs, which are definitely amazing in the shirt she’s wearing. Low cut, but not so low that I can see anything more than just a little cleavage.
Damn
sexy.

Then I remember. Shit. I was supposed to text her before I picked her up. This is not goin’ my way.

I jog up the walk, and she doesn’t look at me. Still pickin’ at that bush.

“Are you mad?”

That’s the dumbest question in the history of questions. I’m really makin’ this a memorable date for her.

Her eyes flick to my face, and what looked like anger flashes to confusion. Forehead puckers in that cute way of hers
,
and her mouth pops open. “I
was
a little peeved.” She stands. “But now I’m more worried about that look on your face. Are you okay?”

No. Quynn’s at my house
,
and I just beat my brother’s face in. And I spent who knows how long in the car tryin’ to calm down. But right now I’m with Hayles, and I don’t want to think about all that
crap
.

“I’m fine.”

I scratch my nose, what I always do when I lie my
face
off… which is why I don’t lie to my parents ‘cause they know this.

“Gracious little fairies, Brody!” She grabs my hand. “You’re bleeding!”

Yeah, bloody and swollen knuckles. My hands are shakin’ too. Don’t know how I missed it. It’s pouring rivers down the back of my wrist.

“Would you look at that.”
Smooth, Brody. On top of bein’ a jackass, you’re now an idiot.

She tugs me inside, not lettin’ go of my arm and nearly sprinting to her kitchen sink. Can’t even process that I’m in her house. Only thing going through my brain is her
touchin’ my skin, running water over my knuckles and washing my arm. The blood doesn’t bug her or nothin’. Her face isn’t calm, worried as hell, but I like that.

She’s worried about me.

I know I’m testing my boundaries, and I have no right to be this close to her after showin’ up late with bloody knuckles, but I trap her between me and the sink, leaning over her head. She still has that mint chocolately scent, but it’s mixed with some sort of fruity lotion or something. Things are movin’ down south just off her smell.

Yeah. Hayles is definitely the girl I want. I can’t even remember why I was so confused before.

I almost whip her around and kiss her, but she lets go of my hand and ducks under my arm, going for the freezer.

“I don’t need that,” I say as she pulls out the ice pack. “I’ll be fine.”

“You sure?” She tosses it between her hands, face going a little pink.

I shut off the water. “Yeah. It feels better already.” ‘Cause it does.

She grabs a towel from the counter. “Heads up.” She tosses it over her shoulder as she puts the ice pack back in the freezer.

I wonder if she even realizes I’m in her house. The one place she doesn’t let anyone near. It’s not a craphole, which is what I expected since she treats it like the plague. It’s clean, and there’s a
butt
load of expensive stuff. Stainless steel appliances and place settings at the table even though it doesn’t look like anyone’s going to be eating soon. There’s framed flowers and other crap like that hangin’ on the walls. Looks like I’ve walked into one of those showcase houses.

But she’s giving me one of those ‘are you really okay?’ smiles, so pretty sure my hand is all she’s concerned about right now.

Again… I like that.

I’m losin’ control over my body. Don’t know how I end up where I do—inches away from her—but she doesn’t shy away. She grabs my hand from under the towel and pokes the skin around the cuts.

“You going to tell me what happened? Or will I have to guess?”

I smile. “You like guessin’ games.”

She shakes her head and tries not to smile back, but fails. “All right. I’ll try to guess on our way to… wherever it is we’re going.” She pauses. “I mean, if we’re still going out.”

“He… heck yeah. It’s your birthday.” Crap. That should’ve been the first thing I said to her. “Uh… Happy Birthday.”
It’s a little late now, Brody.

Her smile fills her face. “Thanks.” Then she tugs me outside like the place is going to blow.

“Okay, be honest,” she says just as we get to the car. “Is what I’m wearing date appropriate? I tried to go comfortable like you said, but still… girls dress up for stuff like this, right?”

She’s givin’ me permission to check her out, which I’ve been doin’ since she walked me to the gas station in the rain, but now I don’t have to be discreet or anythin’. Sweet.

And yeah, she looks sexy as hell. Now that I’m closer
,
I
can see how soft her hair looks
draped over her rack
,
and she’s got on one of those big belt girls wear around their stomachs and it hugs her curved body makin’ her look thinner than she is.

“Brody?”

“Yeah, sorry.” I open the car door and try to get the calm cool guy to come out, instead of this nervous pervert who keeps lookin’ at her cleavage. “You look hot, Hayles. And it’s definitely appropriate for what we’re going to be doin’.”

Something in my stomach goes
wa-bam!
She’s going to love what I got planned for her tonight.

She plops in the seat and puts her feet on the dash. I’m smilin’ like a fool, but everything… I mean all of that
stuff
I was dealin’ with before I headed over here, it’s just… gone.

“Okay, home fry,” she says as I get in the car, “where are we going?” Her voice is calm and all gangster-like, but by the look of her face and the sexy spark in her green eyes, she’s excited.

And I get excited off her gettin’ excited.

“Surprise.”

“No, no, no.” Her lip juts out. “Please tell me.”

It’s hard not to give into that look, but at the same time, I like the effect I’m havin’ on her.

“Nope.”

Instead of beggin’ and whinin’ like mo
st girls would
, her mouth turns up into the hugest of evil grins
,
and she turns t
he station on the radio, lands
on Katy Perry, then cranks it up to burst your eardrums level.

She’s good.

But I’m not cavin’.

And I shock the
crap
out of her by bursting out in song with her. By the end of the song we’re both laughin’ our
fac
es off
,
and that’s the first time in the history of ever I’ve liked listening to pop.

“Okay,” she says as she
turns the music down and wipes
her eyes, “well played, Mr. Grant. Well played.”

I laugh and try to be smooth about grabbin’ her hand. Pretend to go for the radio, but she sees right through it and yanks her hand away like I’m about to taze her.

Damn
it.

“Uh…” She looks out the window. “Are we going downtown?”

“That okay?”

Her smile swallows her face when she looks back at me. “Oh, heck yes!”

She’s too cute. Can’t believe I’m on a date with her. And I don’t care she’s not wanting to, I offer my hand, stickin’ it out in an obvious, ‘hold my hand or I may die’
kind of way. She looks at it, looks at me, then giggles and tucks her fingers between mine.

No suave Faberge—or whatever that butter commercial guy’s name is—but hey, it works.

We talk, and she tries to get me to tell her about my hand, but I won’t. I don’t want to ruin this night by talkin’ about Gabe. And I also don’t have the brain power either since I’m focusing on tryin’ not to sweat a waterfall into her palm. Trip takes about twenty minutes—doesn’t seem that long—then I’m pullin’ in the parking lot.

“Mother of a pearl necklace.”

Just the reaction I wanted. I grin, let go of her hand—I’ll get it back in a second—and get out of the car to open the door for her.

“This okay?”

“Are you for real?” she asks as she steps out.

“Only if you still want to.”

She eyes the sign out front, the bright neon flashing INFINITY TATTOO. When she turns to me, she leaps into my arms so fast I lose balance and crash into the hood of the car.

“Whoops! Sorry.” Her face goes bright red as she climbs off me, but I pull her back, keeping her hand strapped to my swollen one.

“I take that as a ‘yes’?”

She nods, draggin’ me inside.

“I know
exactly
what I want to get!”

Darn girl
can’t stand still. She’s bouncin’ around with a huge smile, and even though she just said she knows what she wants, she’s lookin’ at all the options.

And I can’t keep my hands off her. But she’s lettin’ me, so I lean over her like I did in her kitchen, breathing in her scent as she flips through the laminated pages.

There’s a flush in the back
and
a few seconds later, London comes walkin’ out from the crapper, drying his hands off on some paper towels before chuckin’ them in the garbage.

“Hey, Brody,” he says as he makes his way behind the counter and we clasp hands and bump shoulders. I accidentally smack Hayles in the back of the head with my chin and she ducks out from underneath me. I was pushing my limits anyway.

“How’s it goin’?”

“Same shit.”

I take a glance at Hayles’ face, but I must’ve missed the cringe
,
or she’s too distracted to notice London’s cursing.

“So, you here to get some more ink?”

“Actually—”

“I’m getting one!” Hayley’s still bouncing as she looks at London, big smile on her face. “It’s my first one! Yay!”

London barks out laughin’
,
and I want to sock him if he’s makin’ fun of her, but he leans forward, lookin’ at the book she’s got and says, “Do you have anything in mind?”

She flips through more pages, and her lips turn into an incredibly sexy pout. “I can’t find it.”

London waves his hand in the air, leaning closer to her.

Wait a second. Is he hittin’ on her?

“I really want something that’ll represent like, passion or love or something. Nothing too girly and frilly and stuff, but something that’s like, sexy.”

“Hmm…” He moves from the counter
,
and I take a step closer to Ha
yles. I know it’s possessive
, but I don’t care. She’s my date.

“How about the lotus?” He grabs a couple pieces of art work from the back counter and sets them in front of her. “It’s a flower, which is girly, I know, but… if you want, I can make it smoky. You see this one here?”

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