Secrets (12 page)

“What’d I miss?”  Terrell asked.  Sam and Maisha perked up, too.

I gestured toward the couple.  “Just the usual,” was my only answer.  Sam knew right away what was going on.  Terrell and Maisha figured it out shortly thereafter when the woman leveled her hateful glare on us once again.

“Y’all get that a lot?”  Maisha asked.

Sam waved the couple off nonchalantly.  “Often enough that it doesn’t even really faze us anymore. 

             
Maisha shook her head.  “I
hate
people like that.”

             
So did I – especially the ones like my dad who have no right to look down on
anybody
.  Before I could get mad thinking about him, I pushed the thought aside. 

“It’s cool that y’all just let it die f
or lack of attention,” Terrell commented, briefly glancing back at our disapproving audience.  “I don’t know if I could let it go that easily.”

I chuckled.  “Trust me, it takes time to get to that point, but I just learned that there’s no point in addressing it; there’s no getting through to most people who think like that.  Unless they blatantly disrespect Sam, I just keep it moving.”

Terrell nodded in agreement, watching me for a moment.  “You know what, man?  I like you.  I can already tell you’re a good dude.”

I wasn’t quite ready to meet his enthusiasm just yet, but I gave a tight smile and nod so I wasn’t leaving his compliment hanging out there unanswered.  However, I was beginning to think that Sam was right this time.  As if she’d heard my telepathic admission that I may have possibly misjudged, she smiled a little and squeezed my hand again.

The waitress returned with our food and we kept up conversation while we ate.  After topping the meal off with dessert, we paid our bill and left.

“I’m stu
ffed.  I think I should’ve left that dessert alone,” Maisha said as she rubbed her stomach.

Terrell held her close and laughed a little at the pained look on her face. 
“We should go for a walk when we get back on campus to work some of this food down,” You guys wanna go?”  He asked.

             
Sam turned to me and begged with her eyes.

When I answered with a
more friendly “Sure” than she expected, she smiled big.

We
followed behind Terrell again and Sam stared at me while I drove. 

             
“Thank you,” she said quietly.

             
“For?”

             
“For going; for giving him a chance,” she replied. 

I leaned in and kissed the corner of her mouth before turning back to the road. 
Like I could ever tell her no.

             
Sam grinned, let her eyes drift to the passing scenery again, and then settled back in her seat.  She danced casually while singing along with the radio.  Warm air rushed in through her open window, whipping her hair around like she was at a photo shoot, her soft lips forming around each syllable of the lyrics.  I fought hard to ignore how badly I wanted her, honestly I did, but I couldn’t help it.  This girl…this
one
girl….had the ability to have me hard and ready at the drop of a hat.  It didn’t matter where we were or what the situation was, I’d willingly drop whatever I was doing to have her.  I thought back to all the spontaneous places we’d done it over that past year – my car, the school auditorium, and her attic…..that one didn’t work out too well, though. 

“What you thinking
about?”  She asked when she sensed the tension in the air.

I shook my head. 
“Nothing.  I’m cool.”  And I really did try to be.  I made myself focus on Terrell’s brake lights as we approached a stop.  Sam gave a curious smile at my response, flashing those dimples, making me even hotter for her than I already was. 

“You’re
really not gonna tell me?” she beckoned, casually running her hand up my thigh, inadvertently discovering why I was so distracted all of a sudden.  The corner of her mouth hitched up into a crooked semi-shy smile.  “Oh,” she said softly, trying to pretend like she wasn’t surprised.

This wasn’
t my fault, though.  I’d been deprived for so long that last night awakened a side of me that I forced into hibernation months ago.  However, now that I had a taste, I felt like I had to have it again…..and often.

Sam’s
hand lingered on my leg, bringing my attention to her stare.  When her fingers traveled higher, I released a breath, trying to concentrate on driving while she touched me through my jeans.  She turned her body toward me the rest of the way and switched to massaging me with her right hand instead of the left.  She leaned in slowly and pressed her lips to the side of my ear, causing me to grip the steering wheel tighter. Her mouth traveled to the side of my neck and I relaxed deeper into my seat.

The sound of my zipper slipping down quickened my pulse.  Sam’s mouth never left my skin as she eased her hand inside my boxers and freed
me from the constricting fabric.  I sucked in a sharp breath when the warmth of her hand encircled me and stroked my length slow and steady. 

“You’re
gonna make me crash,” I warned distractedly, finding it hard to care about anything other than her touch at the moment.

“Want me to stop?”  She teased.

I answered with a swift, “
Hell
no.”

She pulled away from my neck with a
wicked smile, lowering her head toward my lap.  “Then shut up,” she commanded coyly.

As I watched her take me into her mouth, I blew all the air out my lungs. 
“Yes, ma’am.”

Who the hell is this girl? 

At the next light, I hit the brakes way later than I meant to.  My mind was completely gone.  I couldn’t think straight for the jolts of pleasure shooting through my body at the moment.  I ran my hand down her back and tried to find the gas pedal when the light turned green again.  Eventually I caught up to Terrell’s car, but hung back a little.  Sam let her lips slip up and down my length in quick, skillful motions that had me twitching and jerking involuntarily.

D
own on the floor somewhere, her phone rang in her purse.  She paused to answer and I let out a disappointed groan.

“Hello?”  She answered.  While the other person replied, Sam eyed me like she couldn’t wait finish.

“K, that’s fine.  We’ll catch up with you guys in a few then,” she added before ending the call.

“What’s up?”  I asked, trying to figure out why she was smiling so big.

“Terrell and Maisha are running to the store first.  They’re gonna meet us back at school in half an hour.”

“That’s plenty of time,” I shot back without even having to think.  Sam braced her hand against the roof of the car when I swerved into the right lane to make the upcoming turn.
  Terrell and Maisha continued straight and we eventually lost sight of them.

“Where’re you going?”  She asked excitedly.

I shrugged.  “The first vacant parking lot I come across.”

She laughed and pushed her hair from her face when I sped up, sending a rush of wind
sweeping through the open windows.  It took two minutes to find a suitable spot behind a newly constructed supercenter that wasn’t open for business yet.  Sam had her shirt and heels off and in the backseat before the car even came to a stop.  Next, she bent awkwardly in her seat to shimmy her jeans and panties down her thighs.  I snatched my pants down to my knees and reclined my seat as far as it would go.  She climbed over the armrest and into my lap impatiently to straddle me.

With
my hands gripping her hips, she eased down on me until our bodies were fully connected.  She sighed with relief as soon as I was inside and I buried my face in her cleavage.  She held the back of my head with both hands while grinding her pelvis against mine in slow circles, forcing me in as deep as possible.  Three gentle kisses to the side of my face caused my eyes to roll back.  Every inch of me wanted every inch of her and I wasn’t ashamed to admit it.  I loved the differences I saw in her since being out on her own.  The sex was always good.  But now?  It was like knowing that she wouldn’t have to go home to her parents’ house after we finished, or pretend to be innocent, she felt free.

Without looking back or brea
king rhythm, Sam reached for the volume on the radio when the song changed, blasting Kendrick Lamar’s
‘Poetic Justice’
until the bass vibrated through my chest.  She moaned into my neck and I embraced her tighter.  Tension mounted quickly and I sought after her lips, drawing her tongue inside my mouth while she rode the beat.  I was so lost in her that I forgot all about the passing traffic only yards away – didn’t care much about the pedestrians who could easily wander over from the sidewalk.  For now, the world had a population of two – just us.

She whimpered and her face contorted with pleasure as an orgasm rocked her entire body from the inside out.  Watching her expression was my undoing,
carrying
me
over the edge as soon as she finished. 

C
hapte
r
6

AJ

All movement ceased and Sam rested her head on my shoulder after a quick kiss.  She moaned in protest when I sat up a few inches to turn the radio down, laying us back again when I was done. 

“I’m sorry for picking that fight with you – and for not believing you about Terrell, for making you feel like you had to answer to me.  I was wrong and I’m sorry for acting the way I have been lately.”  I could feel her cheek tighten against my shoulder when she smiled at the next part.  “I think I was wrong about Terrell; he seems legit.”

She sat up grinning down on me.  “Awwwww, you like him!”

I rolled my eyes playfully.  “Don’t push it.”

She rained kisses all over my forehead, eyes, and lips, making a high-pitched squeal at the same time. 

I smiled.  “Alright, alright, alright……he’s cool.”

She continued to smile as she brushed her thumb over my lips with her hands still fastened to the sides of my face.  “All is forgiven.”

“I was being such a dick
.”  Embarrassment swept over me again just thinking about how pigheaded I’d been.  “Ignoring your calls and messages like that,” I shook my head thinking about how frustrated and hurt she must’ve felt. “Won’t happen again,” I promised. 

She kissed my lips again, more passionately this time.  “Actually…..I’
m kinda glad we fought; it got you out here with me.”

I smiled up at her and got lost in another kiss.
When she rose from my lap to get her clothes back on, I did the same.  First, we laughed at having make do with the napkins in my glove-box for the time being, wiping ourselves down before driving back to her dorm.  We used the last few minutes before having to meet up with Terrell and Maisha to freshen up properly and change our clothes.  When we met them down in the courtyard wearing comfortable sweats and smiles on our faces, they may have know what was up, but just didn’t say anything. 

“We
still going for a walk?” Terrell asked.

“Why don’t we just sit by the fountain and chill,” Sam suggested.  “I’m
kinda tired.”

I smiled to myself, knowing why she suddenly didn’t have the extra energy to exert.

“Sounds good to me,” Maisha chimed in, starting toward the ledge of the fountain as soon as she finished speaking.

Sam
sat as close to me as she could and stared up at the stars.  She looked so innocent, even though I knew better.

“
This is perfect,” she said with a sigh.  “I hate that you have to leave me tomorrow, though.”  I kissed her forehead and acknowledged that I felt the same way she did. 

“How long is the drive back?”  Terrell asked.

I sighed just thinking about it.  “Seventeen hours.”

The distance that I’d driven to be here for only a couple nights seemed to shock him.  What he didn’t know was that I’d do it
every
weekend to be with Sam if I could.

“That’s
gotta be rough,” was all he said back.

“Do you have friends there from your hometown?”  Maisha asked.

I shook my head.  “Nope.”

“
Family maybe?” she inquired next.

“Nope.
  It’s just me.”

She realized that I was about as alone out there as I could be.  “Well…..soon you’ll be here with
your boo, and the four of us should all hang out again sometime, too.”

Surprisingly, I wasn’t as down on that idea as I was when the night began.  “Sounds like a plan.”

Sam yawned beside me.

“Aww, you lame,” Terrell said, waving Sam off.

She laughed and stood to head back inside.  “Whatever.  It’s almost eleven.  I’m going to bed.”

Terrell rolled his eyes at Sam playfully and then looked to me.  “What time you heading out, man?”

I shrugged.  “Probably pretty early.”

He stood, too.  “Well, in case I don’t see you again before you go,
have a safe ride home. “

I nodded.  “Thanks, man.”

Sam took my hand and we’d just taken a few steps toward her building when Terrell spoke again. “Oh!  And don’t worry about ol’ dude.  I’m keeping an eye out.”

Sam’s eyes widene
d when she looked back at Terrell exasperatedly.  I blinked a few times and then frowned, trying to figure out who he was referring to. 

I watched Sam as
she bit down on her lip, which usually meant that she was fighting the urge to say something.  “Antonio,” she admitted.  “Me, Terrell, and Dee saw him at the store right after I got back from New York.”

My whole body tensed, but I stayed silent while Terrell and Maisha watched us
.

“Oh, wow….uhhhh….my bad,” Terrell said apologetically, obviously thinking Sam had already informed me that the one person I hated as much as my father was living nearby.

“I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know how you’d react.”  Sam lowered her head and then looked away completely when she hugged her arms over her chest.

I blew all the air from
my lungs and shoved my hands in my pockets.  When I turned to Terrell and Maisha, Sam watched my expression with worry in her eyes. 

“Well….goodnight,” I said with a stiff smile and
single wave.  Terrell waved back and probably studied me and Sam’s body language the entire walk to her building.  As soon as we were back in her room, Sam started explaining again.

“AJ….I just didn’t
wanna bring it up.  It was right after the trip and we were in a good place.  Plus I know you hate all this distance between us just as much as I do.  Besides he-“

I killed her rant with a long kiss.

“I’m not mad,” was all I said before shutting off the light and climbing into her bed, holding the covers up while she slipped in beside me.  She scooted as close as she could before saying anything else.

“I don’t want you to worry about me here,” she admitted.  “I mean…
it’s one thing for my parents to think I can’t handle myself, but I really want you
specifically
to know that I can handle this.  Handle Antonio even,” she added.

I stroked her hair and kissed the back of her neck once.  “I get it.”  She’d led a pretty sheltered life before this.  Perhaps I
was
guilty of thinking that she couldn’t handle herself.  Overreacting to her friendship with Terrell was a prime example of that.  “My little girl’s growing up,” I joked.

Sam shot her elbow into my ribs just hard enough to make me flinch.  The bed shifted when she turned over so that we were face to face.  Her eyes shined even through the darkness.

“I can’t wait for you to get here,” she confessed contently.

I kissed her forehead and held her closer. 
“Makes two of us.”

She cuddled herself into my chest and eventually fell asleep there.

The silence gave me time to sort through all my thoughts.  She was right; I would’ve been concerned about Antonio being here, but she deserved more credit than I’d given her lately.  It actually helped ease my mind knowing that Terrell was already on the lookout for Antonio trying to come around, though
. 
I shook my head at the idea of the guy whose presence in my girl’s life incited a thousand mile journey a couple days ago, and now knowing that he was here was actually a comfort.  My thoughts toward Terrell were definitely changing…..just like Sam said they would.  Seeing how much he loved his girl
did
honestly end up playing a part in how I gauged his intentions with Sam.  Anyone who genuinely had her best interest at heart was a friend in my book.  Well…..maybe friend is the wrong word, but we were at least on the right path.

Next, I thought back to the point Sam made in the car, the one about how much she’d sacrificed to be with me.  Those weren’t her words, but they were the truth anyhow.  She’d lost friends, her relationship with her father was on the rocks for a while, and let’s not even talk about how having to deal with Leila impacted her life.  In all, the scales were dramatically tipped in her direction in terms of the cost of this relationship.  How stupid was it for me to call her selfish during our argument?  I’d only spoken the words in anger, but they hurt nonetheless.  I wanted to show her that I knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that she had my back – do something that would in no way match her sacrifices, but would let her know that I’m not oblivious to what she’s gone through.  I had an idea and didn’t even need to sleep on it before making the final decision.  She’d think I was crazy, but….in a way, I guess I
kinda was.

*****

When Sam awoke, I was already dressed and sitting in her desk chair.  She rubbed her eyes and squinted at me curiously after her eyes drifted toward the clock.  I should’ve been on the road hours ago.  “What’re you doing?” She asked groggily.

             
I smiled at her.  “Just get dressed.  I want you to go somewhere with me.” 

             
She continued to stare, but pushed the covers away and eased out of bed.  “Fine, just let me take my shower first.”

             
“You can do that when we get back,” I insisted, standing to my feet.  When I gripped her wrists and made her get out of bed she cocked her head to the side. 

“Well, am I al
lowed to brush my teeth at least?” she said with a playful scowl.

“Whatever you can get done in the next ten minutes is fine by me.”
A few seconds passed before she finally turned and paced to the bathroom.  I’d already found the directions that I needed, so once she was ready, we’d be on our way.   Twenty minutes had passed and I grew impatient waiting.  Just as I was about to ask what was taking so long, Sam emerged from the bathroom.  She grabbed a pair of jeans and a tank top from her drawer and dressed slowly. 

“Ready,” she yawned.   

The whole time we were in the car, she questioned me about where we were going.  After I refused a few times, she resorted to begging. 

“Just
be patient.  We’ll be there in a few minutes,” I smiled, knowing that the suspense was killing her.

She sighed and folded her arms ov
er her chest like I’d expected.  When we pulled into the parking lot she read the sign and realized what I was doing.  “
A tattoo
?  Are you crazy, AJ?”  The shrill tone of her voice made me laugh.

“A little.”
  I climbed out of the car and walked around to her side to let her out.  She took my hand reluctantly, but followed anyway.  The smell of stale cigarettes filled the air and there was a distant buzzing sound in the background when we entered.  The guy behind the counter didn’t have an inch of skin that wasn’t inked from the chin down.

“Can I help you?”  He asked.

“Yeah, I just want something simple,” I replied, “on the side of my neck.”

Sam cringed beside me, but said nothing.

“Alright,” the man answered.  “Words?  A picture?  Symbols?  What’d you have in mind?”

“Just her name, Samantha, in script
.” 

“But –
“ Sam started in protest.

“You’re not
gonna talk me out of it,” I shot back with a grin.  Knowing that my mind was far past being made up, Sam shook her head. 

The guy was writing something down and all of a sudden she blurted out, “If you’re getting one, so am I.” 

I turned in her direction to find that she was completely serious. Her nostrils flared briefly when she blew out a nervous breath, probably hoping that I’d jump in and stop her. 

“You sure about that
?”  I asked, thinking about how her parents would react. 

The man’s gaze shifted back and forth between the two of us.

Sam nodded quickly and took a deep breath.  “I’m doing it.”

“We
ll, tell him what you want then,” I said, barely able to fight back my smile.  There was no way she was really gonna go through with it, but in an attempt to not overcrowd her, I kept my mouth shut.

The guy looked up at her and waited.  “Just his initials
‘AJ’
on the inside of my wrist, about this big,” she said as she displayed about an inch of space between her forefinger and thumb.  The man smiled at her, probably thinking the same thing that I was; she’d chicken out.

“Ok, I need to see some ID and get a few signatures and then we can get started.”

I went first of course and Sam cringed the entire time.  It felt like someone was dragging a hot razor through my skin, but I didn’t flinch. Sam held her hands to her mouth as she watched her name being permanently etched into my skin just like it was already on my heart.  When I looked in the mirror at the finished product, I didn’t have any regrets. 

Sam
peered over my shoulder, staring.  Her eyes were watering a little and that was something that I hadn’t expected.  “I can’t believe you just did that,” she said, trying to keep her voice steady.  I wondered if she realized that this was one thing on a long list of many that I’d do just for her.