Secrets (16 page)

“Uh, no.
  She’s at Charleston.  I’m transferring there in January, though.”

She stared thoughtfully.  “That’s sweet, I guess.”

I nodded, not feeling the need to prolong this conversation any further.  “Night,” I repeated, this time making it all the way to the stairs and up to my room before anyone else could stop me.

The second I closed the door, I dialed Sam.  She answered in a whisper to keep from waking Angel, I guessed.

“Took you long enough,” she teased.

“I know
.  Blame my mother.  Only have to keep this up a few more days,” I said, breathing a sigh of relief.

“
She trying to force you and your dad to get along?”  Sam asked.

It occurred to me that I hadn’t mentioned our houseguests, but if I did, I’d have to get into why they were here and it’d become a…thing.  It wasn’t important anyway, so I just replied
with a vague, “Basically.”

“Oh…well, maybe something
good’ll come of it.”  She seemed so optimistic.

“I wouldn’t count on it.”

“Enough about him, though,” she said, sounding like she was wearing a smile.  “Back to that picture you sent me.”

I laughed.  “What about it?”

“It got me kinda hot; what’re you gonna do about that?”  She teased. 

Just as I got ready to answ
er, Angel chimed in with a well-timed, “O-m-Geee!!!!  I’m not even asleep yet!!  Stop it with the dirty talk!  For the love of God!”

Sam could hardly catch her breath
from laughing.  When she calmed down, she gave Angel a half-hearted apology and then addressed me again.  “Well…I guess this conversation is over.  Call me when you wake up?”  She asked, unable to hide the twinge of excitement in her voice.

“Of course I will. 
I just called to tell you that I love you anyway.”

I could hear her smiling through the phone when she replied.  “Love you, too.”

The line went silent and I lay there staring up at the ceiling until I dozed.  I awoke the next morning to the smell of something cooking in the kitchen – a smell I hadn’t smelled in so long that it was foreign to me.  I made my way downstairs, still sporting the t-shirt and basketball shorts from the night before, and the worst case of bed-head known to man.  When I sat across from the twins, Kira was of course the first to say something smart.

“Did you remember to close the dumpster when you climbed out of it?”  She asked.

I gave a sleepy smile and accepted a glass of juice from my mother when she handed it to me.  She tried to tame my hair with her fingers, but gave up with a whispered, “Oh, my”, as she walked back into the kitchen.

“Good morning to you, too,” I replied to Kira’s comment.

“Indeed it
is
a good morning,” my father said casually from his seat at the head of the table.  I wouldn’t look his way.  He never said anything about being nice to
him
; I just had to be nice to our guests and pretend not to hate him.  “How was it sleeping in your old bed?”  He added.

Why does he have to push it? 
“Fine,” was all I said back.

I could feel all eyes on me as I bit into my slice of toast. 

“Have you gotten adjusted to college life, Anthony?”  Mr. Tanaka asked.  “I recall it taking the girls a month or two to become acclimated when they first started last year.”

I nodded. 
“I’m about as settled as I’m gonna be before I switch over to Charleston in a few weeks.”  I tasted my eggs while Mr. Tanaka and my father both stared.

“Charleston?  Your parents didn’t mention that you’d be transferring,” he added.

My mother cleared her throat and took her seat at the table.  There was the slightest hint of nervous tension on her face.

“Yeah, I’ll be heading there right after Winter Break.  Everything’s already set in stone,” I said, making eye contact with my father.

“Was the decision based on curriculum?  Or…did you receive a late scholarship offer?”  Mr. Tanaka asked.

I shrugged.  “No, I-“

“Westwood just isn’t what Anthony, nor my wife and I, hoped it would be,” my father interjected, preventing me from telling Mr. Tanaka why I’d changed my plans.  “We believe that Charleston’s program will better meet Anthony’s academic expectations.”

Unbelievable
.

Mr. Tanaka seemed satisfied with my father’s explanation and dropped the issue so that he could finish his meal.  I, on the other hand, was fuming.  At every turn, my father found new way
s to belittle my relationship and I was sick of it. 

“Reina?
  Kira?  Did you sleep well?”  My mother asked to change the subject.

“Yes, ma’am,” they replied in unison.

“Can we help you prepare Thanksgiving dinner?”  Kira offered.

My mother gave her a warm smile.  “That’d be nice.”

Reina shot Kira a quick side-eye and then looked back at her plate.

“I’ll get a taste of what it’s like having a daughter,” my mother joked.  “Anthony’s never been much help in the kitchen
.”

Kira looked at me and gave a shy smile inst
ead of sharing one of her usual cynical comments.

“Actually…I think Kira’s on to something,” my father interjected.  “Perhaps if we all pitch in in the kitchen, we can pull out the board games when all of the work is done.”

I couldn’t take any more of my father’s
‘family-man’
act and keep my breakfast down.  “Better break out the Dust-buster, too, while you’re at it, ‘cause those things have been in the closet for close to a decade,” I said as I stood from my chair, inadvertently letting our guests know that the man sitting at the head of the table today, was
not
the same man who sat there the day before.  He was really laying it on thick.  “Board games…” I muttered to myself as I prepared to retreat to my bedroom until time to head over to Sam’s.

“Where’re you going?”  He asked, trying to mask his anger.

“My room.”

“You’ll be helping with dinner, right?” 

Was this guy serious?
  “Dad,” I said through gritted teeth, “I won’t even be
eating
here, so, no…I won’t be helping with dinner.”

It was clear by my father’s expressio
n that this was news to him, although I couldn’t understand why.  I watched his expression go from shocked to furious in three seconds flat.  When I walked off, he was on my heels as soon as he excused himself from the table.  He caught up to me in the foyer just in front of the stairs.  The feel of his hand on my arm when he grabbed it prompted me to snatch from his grasp and shoot him a warning glare.

“I thought we had an understanding,” my father hissed, looking over his shoulder to make sure that no one was around to see him for his true self.

“We do, and I’m playing along
JUST
so I can have my life back.  But our understanding had nothing to do with where or with whom I spend my time.  I’m going to Sam’s.  End of story.”

“What about the girls?  How will
they
feel if you don’t show?”

I frowned.  “What are you even talking about?  One: who cares how they feel about it?  Two: no one’s upset about me leaving, but you!  I
never agreed to babysit anyone.  I’ve got plans.”

When I continued on to my bedroom, my father stood there staring at the back of my head, probably trying to think of ways that he could
stop me, but there weren’t any.  I spent the rest of the day alone in my room until it was time to shower and leave.  When I came down the steps, my father caught sight of me from where he sat talking to Mr. Tanaka and the polite smile faded from his face as I walked toward the back door to exit through the garage.

After sending Sam a quick
“I’m on my way”
text, I backed out.  When I reached for the garage remote, I was surprised to see Kira standing against the brick, attempting to hide a cigarette behind her leg. 

I rolled my window down.  “You know I’m
gonna want hush money, right?”  I said with a laugh.

She walked the few feet to my car
and bent toward my window.  “Well, sucks for you; my parents already know.  Technically, it’s
your
family I’m hiding my nicotine addiction from.”

I smiled, totally relating
to having to keep up appearances.  “Well…either way, you’re secret’s safe with me.”

I rolled the window up a few inches
and started backing up again when Kira stopped me.  “You gonna be out late?”  She asked.

I questioned her with my eyes. 
“Probably.  Why?”

She shrugged and looked out at the trees lining out property, boredom heavy in her expression. 
“Just asking.  I gotta get out of here.  I haven’t left your house in over 24-hours.”

I laughed.  “Yeah, my father can be intense.”

“Yours?  You didn’t have to get the
‘Act like you weren’t raised by wolves’
speech my father gave me and Reina this morning.”  Kira looked up at the sky thoughtfully.  “On second thought, Reina might’ve needed it, but it was degrading nonetheless.”

I smiled a little.  I didn’t want to rush her, but I had to get going.  She noticed that I’d checked the clock for a second time and realized that she was keeping me.  “Oh, crap.  Why didn’t you just tell me I was talking too much?  Go get to Samantha,” she said, gesturing toward my neck.”

I nodded.  “Try to have fun in there.”

Kira replied with
nothing more than a sarcastic grin and I backed out of the driveway to where Vick sat parked on the street.  His presence was just the little reminder that I needed to stick to this deal with my father.

I couldn’t wait
for this to all be over with……

C
hapte
r
8

Sam

“That
went much better than last year, wouldn’t you say?”  I asked, leaning into AJ’s side as we sat hugged up on the couch.  My mind drifted back to how my father ruined Thanksgiving
and
my birthday last year, thanks to his feelings about me and AJ being together.  Now, he sat right across from the two of us, reading his newspaper without even paying us any attention.  He smiled when he turned the page and caught me watching him.

“
Much
better,” AJ replied.

I peered up
at him and adjusted the high collar of his navy sweater that zipped from the chest; a small portion of the ‘a’ at the end of his tattoo was showing.  We’d eaten hours ago and were only waiting for my mother to call us into the living room for cake and to open my presents like she always does.  I made a mental note to tell her that I think this year should be the last that we make such a big deal of my birthday; I couldn’t see me still going through the rigmarole at twenty.

My mother stood in the entryway and waved us toward the dining room.  I sighed when I stood, trying to hide how ridiculous I felt about the whole production.  I mean, yeah, I wanted the gifts, but my mother insisted on the whole singing Happy Birthday, blowing out candles, and…

“Make a wish!”  She said with a smile.

I glanced up at
Angel and AJ who were both holding a laugh. 

“
Okayyy, Mom.”

I blew all nineteen of my candles out only to have them burn to life again.  With a heavy sigh, I pretended to be amused. 
“Very funny.”

Instead of making a fool of myself, I grabbed a glass of water someone left on the tab
le and removed the candles from the icing and submerged them one by one.

“Party pooper,” my mother said, kissing my forehead before cutting into my cake.  Ever since I got home, she’s been babying me even more than she did before I left. 
She did the load of laundry I brought home without having to ask; she had my father take my car to get washed, and now this. 

While she passed out slices to the ten or so family members who showed up for dinner this year, I doled out the ice cream. 

“It could be worse,” Angel said in my ear when she approached with more dessert plates.  “At least it isn’t a Hello Kitty cake this time, right?”

I smiled and decided to lighten up.  It wasn’t like I wasn’t grateful, I was just waiting for my parents, more specifically my mother, to realize that I wasn’t a kid anymore.  Still, I straightened up so she didn’t misread my frustration for something else.  All
in all, I was appreciative of the time my parents took to plan and celebrate my birthday. 

We ate and then cleared the plates from the ta
ble before settling in again for me to open gifts. 

“
You should start with the cards,” my mother suggested.

I shrugged…and then absentmindedly reached
toward the stack of colorful envelopes on the edge of the table.  It was my mother’s gasp that signaled me that I’d messed up. 

“What…is that….on your wrist?”  She asked in a clipped tone.  Angel took a step back as if to get out of the line of fire.

There was no point in trying to lie my way out of this one; she caught me.

“A tattoo,” I said quietly.

“A
what?
”  The vicious expression on my mother’s face gave me pause.

“A
tattoo
.”

My father stepped closer and took my hand, flipping it over to examine the initials on my wrist
just below my left palm.  His eyes darted to AJ.

“He didn’t have anything to do with this,” I offered up just in case my dad
decided to aim his wrath in AJ’s direction.  “I made the decision on my own, so if you’re mad, be mad at me.”

My mother sighed and shook her head to emphasize how disappointed she was
in me.  Everyone besides my parents, AJ, and me left the dining room.  My father paced, grimacing in my direction every now and again.

“The second you
get out there on your own, you start showing out!” my mother scolded.

“Mom,
it’s just a tattoo,” I reasoned.  “It’s not a big deal.” 

Judging by her
expression, that was
clearly
the wrong thing to say.  “Not a big deal,” she repeated.

My father shoved his hands in his pockets and stared at the floor.  “What were you thinking?”  He asked in as calm a tone as he could manage.

“I was thinking that I’m grown and this is
my
body.”  I didn’t mean for it to come out sounding as smart as it did either, but…

He smirked at my comment.  “Grown…”

This wasn’t going well.  When I sighed, my mother looked my way. I had to try to gain some ground before my parents completely went over the deep end over this. “Listen…I didn’t do this out of spite or to upset you guys.  I just thought – “

“No, I don’t think you
‘thought’
at all,” my mother interrupted.  “What possessed you to drive your happy-tail up to a tattoo parlor and-“

I saw AJ step forward and didn’
t have a chance to stop him before he came to my defense, sacrificing himself to take some of the heat off me.  “Actually, Mrs. Kelley…
I
drove Sam to get the tattoo.  It was my idea.  We
both
got one.”

I shot AJ an incredulous look that he ignored. 
Why would he do that?
  I’d JUST gotten my father to accept us being together!  I didn’t want Daddy thinking he was a bad influence on me or anything.  My fear was that AJ’s attempt to help had just made the situation worse.  My mother cocked her head to the side and my father wouldn’t look at AJ at all.

“I promise the two of you are
gonna give me a heart attack,” my mother said mostly to herself, clearly revisiting some of the other offenses we’d committed in the past.  “Have your parents seen yours?”  She asked AJ.

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“And what did
they
have to say?  I’m gonna guess they weren’t happy either,” she added.

“Not exactly.”

My mother shook her head at us again.  Her eyes drifted down to AJ’s wrist, subconsciously looking for what she assumed would be a matching tattoo.  When she realized that his wrists were bare, I let out a long breath.  Before the questions had a chance to start flying, I mumbled for AJ to just show her his.

My father turned toward AJ too just as he unzipped the collar of his sweater and turned down
the right side.

“These kids have
completely
lost
their minds,” my father said as he shook his head and walked toward the window.

“In AJ’s defense, he tried to talk me out of it.  I was the one who insisted,” I threw in as a last-ditch effort to save his reputation with my parents.

They were both silent while AJ and I waited for them to deliberate.  While there wasn’t much that they could do in terms of punishment, I still didn’t want them to be disappointed in me.  Since going away to school, the main point I’d been trying so desperately to prove was that I’m an adult.  Now, it felt like I’d taken two giant steps back.  They’d never believe that I was maturing after this.

“Well…what’s done is done,” my father said
with a heavy sigh.  I looked up as he gazed over at me.  Some of the anger had subsided, which I was grateful for, but I still didn’t understand.  Next, he peered over at AJ.  “Besides…it’s hard to be mad at that little thing on
Sam’s
wrist when this boy’s got her whole government name practically tattooed on his neck.”

Neither AJ nor I knew how to react when my father burst out laughing.  We looked at one another, confused.  My mother didn’t know what to make of it either.

“James, this is
not
-“

“Oh, Deb, relax.”  He took my hand again and shook his head at what I’d done.  “We were young and dumb once too.  Emphasis on the
‘
dumb’
part,” he said when he let my arm fall to my side.  Apparently my father was letting us off the hook.

My mother watched my father
in disbelief when he approached AJ to get a closer look at his neck.  “And that seemed like a good idea at the time?”  My father asked, genuinely curious as to what was going through AJ’s mind when he made the decision.

“
I’d do it again,” AJ replied respectfully.

A slow smile crossed my father’s face and then he patted AJ’s shoulder
as he led him away to talk without my mother and I being able to hear.  “I would’ve loved to have seen the look on your father’s face,” was the last part that I heard before they turned the corner, probably headed for Daddy’s study.

“Mom?”
  I reached for her hand and she turned to look my way, hurt still very present in her expression.  “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

She nodded and then turned to grab the glass I used to put out my candles.  When she made a step toward the kitchen, I touched her arm.  There was more to this than being upset that I’d permanently marred my body, she’d been having a hard time
with me going away since summer rolled around.  The thought of really having to let me go scared her to death.  Me getting this tattoo symbolized my ability to make decisions for myself, even if they were decisions that she didn’t like, and it also symbolized me not being her baby anymore.

How could I not sympathize with that?
  “I’m fine out there, Ma.  I promise.”

For a long time she looked over my face
, touching the few places where I knew some of my scars were still slightly visible.  Eventually, her stare softened and she nodded, clutching my hand. 

“I know
you are,” she finally answered.

“And I promise this is the last one,” I added with a smile.

She shot me an
‘I know it better be’
look that she meant as a warning.  I made her hug me and thanked her for the cake and presents while I had her in my arms. 

“You’re welcome,” she replied, st
ill sounding a little salty.  It’d wear off by later that night, I figured. 

“Alright, let’s finish with these presents so I can get to bed,” my father announced casually
as he entered the room with AJ at his side. 

I glanced over at AJ and shot him a relieved look that he met with a smile.
I wasn’t sure what he and my father discussed, but whatever it was seemed to have put him in a good mood.

*****