Sex, Marriage and Family in World Religions (40 page)

Hence this verse functions as a limitation over patriarchal men who would like to interfere in women’s lives unjustifiably, solely because of their gender or because they support them financially.

Unfortunately, many male jurists simply missed the significance of the Qur’anic choice of the word
qiwamah.
Their interpretations tended to reflect a patriarchal worldview of authoritarian leadership roles within the family. In fact, the word
qawwam
in the Arabic language has different connotations. For example, the “
qawwam
over the mosque” is the one who serves it, and the “
qawwam
over the plants
(al-zar’)
” is the one who tends them. In neither context is there a sense of superiority or domination, but rather one of service.

The limitations on
qiwamah
were interpreted as justifications for gender superiority by adopting a specific linguistic reading of the word
bima
in the Qur’anic verse. This word is a connective. It conditions the first part of the verse on the second two parts. Traditionalists interpreted it to mean
because
.

But the word
bima
has a richer and more complex meaning than, for example, the words
lima
or
li’anna,
which are better translated as because but significantly were not used in this verse.
Bima
is better understood to mean “to the extent” or “in circumstances where.” These differences in linguistic interpretations may appear slight, but in the context of the verse can make significant difference.

To illustrate this point we have provided two alternative translations of the verse. The traditional one (alternative A), combined with the patriarchal claim that men are always in a more favorable position vis-à-vis women because of their physical strength and superior intellect, provide the basis for the claim of gender superiority. Furthermore, by restricting the woman to the home, patriarchal society made women financially (and otherwise) dependent on men.

This approach ensured that both limitations specified in the verse were always satisfied. Alternative B offers a different approach more consistent with the overall Qur’anic view of gender relations.

Another verse in the Qur’an states in part that “men have a degree over women.” Taken out of context and combined with the other verse, it was used to develop an overarching interpretation of male supremacy in society and the family. This interpretation, however, encouraged oppressive males to move
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away from the Islamic ideal of marital relationships and affected the develop-ment of healthy gender relations in society.

Document 3–41

q u r ’ a n 4 : 3 4

a l t e r n a t i v e t r a n s l a t i o n s o f q u r ’ a n i c v e r s e 4 : 3 4

( a l - n i s a ’ , t h e w o m e n ) :

Alternative A. “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because God has given the one more (strength) than the other and because they support them from their means.”

[Translation by Yusuf Ali]

Alternative B. “Men are
qawwamun
(caretakers) over women,
bima
(to the extent, in circumstances where) God has given some of them more than others, and
bima
they support them from their means.”

[Translation by Azizah Al-Hibri]

Document 3–42

q u r ’ a n , 2 : 2 2 8 – 2 3 2

And women shall have rights similar to the rights against them, according to what is equitable; but men have a degree (of advantage) over them.18

[Al-Baqarah, The Cow]

Document 3–43

q u r ’ a n 2 : 1 8 7

They are your garments
(libas)
and you are their garments.

[Al-Baqarah, The Cow]

Document 3–44

q u r ’ a n 9 : 7 1

The believers, men and women, are
walis
(protectors), one of another.

[at-Tawbah, Repentance]

Document 3–45

h a d i t h

The Prophet said, “Every one of you is a shepherd and every one of you is responsible for his flock. A ruler is in charge of his subjects and is responsible 180

a z i z a h a l - h i b r i a n d r a j a ’ m . e l h a b t i for them; a man is in charge of his household and responsible for those in his charge; a wife is in charge of her husband’s household and she is responsible for those in her charge. . . . ”

[Hadith narrated by ‘Abdullah Ibn ‘Umar, in al-Bukhari,
Sahih al-Bukhari,
vol. 7, bk. 62,
Kitab al-Nikah
(marriage), 116 and Muslim,
Sahih Muslim,
bk. 20, Kitab al-Imarah, hadith no. 4496 (9th century ce)]

Document 3–46

m u h a m m a d i b n a h m a d a l - a n s a r i a l - q u r t u b i “And you are their garments” the term garment
(libas)
refers to all kind of clothes. The fusion of each one of the spouses with the other was analogized to a garment because they blend with each other when they hug and their bodies come close, fuse, and stay together like a garment. . . . ”

[Muhammad Ibn Ahmad al-Ansari Al-Qurtubi,
al-Jami’ li Ahkam al-Qur’an
(The Compendium of Legal Rulings of the Qur’an), 4 vols.

(Beirut: Dar Ihya’ al-Turath al-‘Arabi, 1985), 2:316 (12th century ce)]

Document 3–47

a b u h a m i d a l - g h a z a l i

[A] husband is a shepherd in his family and is accountable about his flock. The Prophet said, “It is a blameworthy sin for a man to fail to provide for his co-dependents.”

It is also reported that a person who deserts his family is like a fugitive slave.

Neither his prayer nor his fasting will be accepted till he returns to them.

Similarly, a person who fails to fulfill their rights, even if he were present, would be considered a deserter, for God says, “Shield yourselves and your family from hellfire.” God ordered us to protect them from hellfire like we would protect ourselves. One may not be able to fulfill even his own needs, and once married that burden doubles as somebody else’s needs become his responsibility. . . .

That’s why some people decide not to marry altogether . . . That’s the excuse Ibrahim Ibn Adham [d. C. 777] gave for his celibate life. He said, “I cannot mislead a woman, and I have no desire in them.” He meant that he cannot fulfill her rights, needs, and desires. Also, Bishr [d. 841] said, “What prevents me from marriage is God’s saying “and women have rights similar to those against them in a just manner.”

[Abu Hamid Al-Ghazali, ‘Ihya’ ‘Ulum al-Din (The Revival of Sciences of Religion), 4 vols. (Egypt: Mustafa al-Babi al Halabi, 1939), 2:43–46 (11th century ce)]

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Document 3–48

a b u j a ’ f a r m u h a m m a d i b n j a r i r a l - t a b a r i “Men are
qawwamun
over women” means that men are in charge of their women in chastising them, stopping them from doing what they want to do in those matters where the women have obligations towards God and [the husbands]. . . .

It means [men are] princes over women. She has to obey him in matters that God ordered her to obey him, such as being kind to his family, and pre-serving his wealth. His preference over her is in his maintenance and generosity. . . . It is said the man is
qa’im
[another form for
qawwam
] [meaning]

he orders her to obey him, and if she refuses, he may beat her lightly. . .

[Al-Tabari, Jami’ al-Bayan fi Tafsir al-Qur’an, 5:37 (9th century ce)]

Document 3–49

m u h a m m a d f a k h r a l - d i n a l - r a z i You should know that this verse [“Men are
qawwamun
over women”] follows the previous one that reads “And in nowise covet those things in which God hath bestowed His gifts more freely on some of you than on others.” We have mentioned that the reason for the revelation of this verse is the fact that some women insinuated that men have a preferential treatment in matters of inheritance. In this verse God reminded them that the rationale of this preferential treatment was due to the fact that men have the duty to financially maintain women. Despite the fact that both of them enjoy each other, men have the duty to provide
mahr
and full maintenance. So that the preference or addition on one side is compensated by additional responsibilities on the other side, which comes to say that there is no preference at all.

[Muhammad Fakhr al-Din al-Razi (1149–1209),
Tafsir al-Fakhr al-Razi
(al-Razi’s Commentary on the Qur’an) [the real title is
Mafatih al-Ghayb
(The Keys to the Unknown], 32 vols. (Beirut: Dar al-Fikr, 1985), 10:90 (12th century ce)]

Document 3–50

m u h a m m a d r a s h i d r i d a

[“Men are
qawwamun
over women” ] means that it is customary that they [men]

take charge of their women, by protecting them, taking care of them, guarding them, or providing for them. . . . The meaning of
qiyam
[noun from
qawwamun
]

here is in reference to leadership where the governed can act upon his or her will and choice, rather than being oppressed, deprived of will, and unable to do anything but what he or she is told to do.”

[Rida,
Tafsir al-Manar,
5:67 (19th century ce)]

182

a z i z a h a l - h i b r i a n d r a j a ’ m . e l h a b t i
Document 3–51

m u h a m m a d ‘ a k l a h

Joint leadership between the man and the woman is not acceptable because it leads to corruption and chaos; . . . it is also unsuitable to place
qiwamah
in the hands of the wife for the following reasons:

The woman does not possess a reserve of nerves or a psychological reserve that would make her capable of carrying the burdens of leadership. . . .

Giving
qiwamah
to the woman is unfair to the man, to his maintenance efforts, and his shouldering of heavy family responsibilities. It means that the man would become subject to the woman’s will.

This causes his personality to dissolve, and his dignity within the family to disappear.

But the man is capable of shouldering this responsibility [of
qiwamah
] . . .

because of his emotional balance and ability to fight and bear the consequences of the fight. This is especially true because woman’s housework and huge responsibilities within the home require all her time and exhaust all her energies.

[Muhammad ‘Aklah,
Nitham al-Usrah fi al-Islam
(Amman: Maktabat al-Risala al-Haditha, 1983), pp. 18–19]

Document 3–52

s h e i k h m u h a m m a d m u t a w a l l i s h a ’ r a w i The duty of
qiwamah
is not an absolute
fadl
19 (preference) given to the man, it is rather a responsibility or assignment. Therefore “men are
qawwamun
over women” means that men are responsible for taking care of women, providing for them, and serving them. . . . And assuming every other duty that is required by this responsibility. The meaning of “some over the others” is not that God has given a preference to men over women as some people believe. . . . For if God meant this, He would have said, “God has preferred men over women.”

. . . However, He—the Almighty—said, “God has preferred some over some others.” He used the word “some” twice in a vague and general way, which means that
qiwamah
requires a
fadl
of effort, action, and work from the man’s side. . . . And this is equated from the other side by qualities that the woman has and the man cannot have. She, therefore, has a preference over him, for he cannot bear children and cannot menstruate. This is the reason why God says in another verse, “And do not covet each other in what God has preferred some of you over some others.” This injunction is addressed to everybody and again the word “some” is used so that it shows that some has a preference in one matter and does not have it in other matters. . . . There is, therefore, no
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point in establishing a comparison between two persons who have different tasks and responsibilities.”

[Sheikh Muhammad Mutawalli Sha’rawi (1911–1998) (former minister of Islamic Affairs and Affairs of al-Azhar Institute, Cairo, Egypt), interview with
Al-Anba’

(Kuwaiti newspaper), 4 November 1988, p. 6]

Document 3–53

a b u b a k r m u h a m m a d i b n a b d i l l a h i b n a l - ‘ a r a b i a l m a l i k i This verse, “And men have a degree over them (women),” is a clear-cut statement that the man is preferred over her and that he is over her with regard to conjugal rights. However, the term
degree
here is a general term and its meaning is not detailed. It was taken from other evidential texts other than this verse. So in this verse God made women aware that men are superior to them but the details were left to his messenger to explain.

Scholars, however, disagreed as to the true meaning of this verse. They expressed a multitude of views. . . .

No intelligent person could ignore the superiority of men to women. Suffice it to say that the woman was created from man, and in that he is her origin.

Nonetheless, the verse did not come to reveal an absolute state of superiority that could be detailed by enumerating the virtues of men over women.

Therefore, it was essential to look at it [the degree] in the context of marital rights, and we found that they could be categorized into seven sections: The first: the duty of obedience by women, and this is a general right.

The second: the right for men to be served by their wives, and this is a specific right further discussed in matters related to branches of Islamic law
(Furu’)
.

The third: the right to oversee her financial dealings, so that she deals not but with his consent.

The fourth: that she puts her obedience to him before that of God in matters related to auxiliary worship,20 so that she cannot fast without his permission nor can she perform the pilgrimage to Makkah but with him.

The fifth: paying the
mahr.

The sixth: maintaining her continuously.

The seventh: The permissibility of chastising her, which is stated in God’s saying, “Men are the maintainers of women.”