Shattered (Shattered #1) (8 page)

My mouth dropped open at his admission. I knew UNC wanted him, I knew
others did too. Back then as a sophomore, I had no idea what he was giving up.
I took him for granite. He was right. “I’m sorry,” I begged. “You’re right. I
didn’t deserve you.”

We stood there nose to nose glaring at one another for what felt like
hours. All the pent up frustrations we had with one another boiling just below
the surface. I knew that if I let them out, I would never be able to take back
the anguish I’d cause. Nick’s eyes darted from my eyes to my lips and back to
my eyes. I saw the desire behind them. He still felt something for me somewhere
in there. He was fighting to keep it buried, but being here…back at this
place…it was bringing it to the surface.

“Can we try again?” I whispered almost pleadingly. “Start over? See what
happens?” I was rambling and I knew it, but I wanted so desperately to see
where this would go.

“I don’t know if I can,” Nick dropped his chin down on his chest. “How
do I know that you won’t up and leave again?”

“You don’t, but I think we owe it to ourselves to see where this could
go. We were great back then and we were only kids, I bet it would be amazing
now.”

Nick nodded his head and sighed, “Fine…we’ll see what happens.” He took
a few steps back and opened the door to his truck. After climbing in, he sat
there, and shook his head as if he couldn’t believe what had just happened.

I turned and walked back over to my car just as Nick was backing up, and
turning to head down the road. A small smile crept over my lips. What had just
happened here? Were we dating again? We really hadn’t discussed what this would
mean. Feeling lighter and completely emotionally worn down, I headed home. My
brain and heart had suffered enough today. I needed to go to bed. I’d talk to
Nick at work tomorrow and find out what this really meant. Right now…I just
wanted to bottle this feeling I had up. I knew that we’d have a rocky road
ahead of us. This one conversation was not going to fix all our problems.

ooooooooo

Nick

What just happened? I pulled into Dave’s without even realizing that I
was driving there. Had I just agreed to try again with Leah? What the hell
possessed me to do that? I climbed out of my truck and stalked into the bar. My
brother was in his usual spot along with a few of our friends. Their table was
littered with beer bottles, and a loud raucous of laughter was coming from
their direction.

“Nick,” Cam called over the group. “What the hell are you doing here?”

I shook my head at his obvious inebriation, and headed over to the
table. Cam had a habit of blowing off steam by drinking himself into a stupor.
Normally I wouldn’t care, I’d be right there with him, but lately it was like
he was trying to erase a memory or something. I knew I had no room to talk when
it came to that. I can’t tell you how many nights I sat here with a bottle of
Jack drowning the memories of Leah.

Once I sat down beside him, he slung his arm around me and leaned into
my face breathing his beer breath on me. “Hey, Buuuuddy,” he snickered. “You
have a good day?”

“Cam…why the fuck are you so drunk?” I groaned as I pushed him back a
little.

“It’s Sarah,” he shook his head. “She’s pregnant,” he downed another
shot before picking up the bottle on the table and pouring another. “She says
it’s mine,” he lifted the glass and tossed it back. “Fucking bitch lied to me,”
he slammed it back down, “Said we were protected.”

“I think that’s enough,” I placed my hand on the bottle and moved it out
of his reach. “I can’t believe you jackasses let him get this way,” I glared at
the two douche bags sitting at the table across from my brother.

“Hey man,” douche bag number one said, “he was like that when we got
here.”

Cam crossed his arms on the table and dropped his head as he mumbled,
“How am I going to raise a kid? I don’t know anything about babies.”

“You’ll learn,” I nudged him. “Come on…I’ll take you home,” I stood from
the table, tossed some bills down, and helped Cam out to my truck. This day
just kept getting better and better. How the hell did I go from being the
town’s rebel to the responsible adult?

ooooooooo

When we pulled up to my house, Cam was leaning against the door sound
asleep. “Hey,” I poked him in the side, “I’m not carrying you asshole. Wake
up!”

Cam lifted his head and then flipped me off before pushing his door
open, and attempting to stand. “Seriously dude, what am I going to do? I don’t
want a kid, and she waited too long to do anything about it. I got no choice in
it now.”

“You shoulda wrapped it…that’s what you shoulda done,” I chuckled lightly.
It wasn’t funny, but I couldn’t help it. It seemed like the women in mine and
my brother’s lives had a habit of making decisions without our input.

“She said she was on the pill,” he grumbled again.

“Yeah well…that doesn’t always work,” I helped him up my front steps and
into the house. “You should always wrap it just in case.”

“Now you tell me,” he glanced over his shoulder at me. “Some big brother
you are.”

“I’m gonna let that slide,” I glared at him “because I know you know
better, and you’re drunk. Don’t ever accuse me of not looking out for you
again, or I’ll beat your scrawny ass.” As we made our way into the living room,
I released his arm and let him fall to the couch, “get some sleep. We’ll talk
in the morning.”

“Yeah, ok,” he flopped over and passed out before I had even left the
room.

With everything that had happened today I doubted I get any sleep.
Between Leah and my brother’s latest confession about his impending fatherhood,
I could tell my life was getting ready to be much more interesting. Who knew
that shit like this could happen in a small town like Pittsford? I knew that
the gossip mill would be churning by the end of the week about what was going
on with Cam and Sara, I only hoped that he could keep it together for his kid’s
sake.

Chapter 8

Nick

When I made my way out to the living room, I found my brother hanging
half off the couch with a blanket barely covering him. He’d passed out drunk
last night after he’d managed to spill his guts about the woman he’d been
calling his girlfriend. Sara and he had a weird relationship to put it lightly.
They’d been on again off again for a while. I secretly wondered if this baby he
was talking about was even his.

Shaking my head, I made my way into the kitchen and began to brew some
coffee. As I leaned against the counter, I began replaying the previous night
over in my head. Where did Leah and I stand? We hadn’t seen or talked to each
other in over five years, and now it seemed like we had agreed to date again.
The thought of being with her like we used to be set my stomach rolling. “Get
it together,” I mumbled to myself. I felt like a teenager again. I don’t
remember the last time a woman sent my head spinning the way Leah did
yesterday. Work was definitely going to be interesting today.

“Get up asshole!” I yelled in the direction of the couch. “I gotta go to
work.”

Cam groaned as he tossed his arm over his face covering his eyes, “Go
away!”

“No! Get up!” I yanked the blanket off him and kicked his foot.

“I’ll lock up…just leave me alone,” he mumbled as he rolled over.

“No way are you staying in my house alone. You need to talk to Sara and
fix this shit,” I smacked his head causing him to spring up in a sitting
position.

He turned and faced me with a scowl on his face, “What was that for?”

I rolled my eyes and chuckled, “Go home.”

Cam grumbled some more before he stood and made his way into my kitchen
to get some coffee. After filling two travel mugs and grabbing a muffin off of
my counter, I made my way out to my truck. I have no idea why, but I began
heading toward Avery’s house. As much as I was still feeling my way around on
this, I knew I needed to see her. If I was serious about giving whatever it was
we were doing a chance, I knew I needed to make an effort.

ooooooooo

Leah

After stepping out of the shower, I glanced in the mirror while I fought
the tangles in my hair. I couldn’t believe the night’s sleep I had gotten. It
was the first time in I don’t know how long that I actually slept all night.
I’d been in the habit of getting up in the middle of the night for a while. No
one knew, but dreams of my accident haunted me. I still had nights where I’d
wake up in cold sweat imagining them pulling me from my car. Sometimes the
dreams were so bad that I would go for a run at night. Pure exhaustion seemed
to be the only way I could get back to sleep.

Last night, I managed to pass out, and not have the dream of that day
replay in my mind. Instead, dreams of Nick and our last year together plagued
me. Despite what I voiced to others, that was a great year.

I shook my head as I watched the woman in the mirror stare back at me.
She looked happy. Pink cheeks and bright eyes stared as a tiny smile tried to
emerge. I knew today would be different. I wasn’t sure how, but I knew
something had changed.

After dressing in a pair of cotton shorts and a t-shirt, I made my way
into the kitchen. Avery was sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper
and sipping a cup of coffee.

“Morning,” I smiled at her.

“Morning,” she grumbled back.

Avery was not a morning person. When she ended up taking on the early
shift at her mom’s flower shop, I was shocked. We’d always been night owls, and
would stay up as late as our bodies would allow.

“What’s got you so chipper today?” she glanced over at me scrutinizing
my appearance.

I shrugged, “What do you mean?”

“You haven’t been like this in a long time Leah. I know you. We used to
talk on the phone every day.”

“Maybe I have something to be happy about now,” I grinned.

“You met up with him, didn’t you? He showed up last night,” she smirked
and then stood to move in front of me.

I only nodded, afraid that if I voice my happiness aloud, it might not
be real.

“Finally,” she rolled her eyes. “You two have been miserable for years.
It’s about time you worked your shit out.”

“We’ll see,” I lifted one shoulder. “I don’t know how serious this is
yet. He didn’t seem too excited last night. He didn’t even try to kiss me.”

“He’s just afraid. You wrecked him the last time. I’m sure he wants this
just as bad as you do. He’s just afraid of letting go again, and you bolting
the first chance you get.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” I sighed. “Why doesn’t anyone believe me?”

“You have to prove that,” she shook her head. “All any of us ever heard
about from you was how you wanted to get away. Now you’re here, and we’re all
waiting for you to bolt again.”

“I know,” I hung my head. “I just want things to get back to the way
they once were. I’m willing to do just about anything to get them that way.”

Before the conversation could morph into a fight, I finished my coffee
and began to head into the living room. Avery and I had been friends for so
long that we fought like sisters. I could always tell when she was getting
ready to go off on me. Now was one of those times. I knew I’d hurt her just as
much as everyone else when I’d left. Being here was hard. I had so many fences
to fix.

“I gotta get out of here,” I called over my shoulder. “I want to talk to
Nick before school starts, and I need to set up a practice schedule.”

“Alright,” she shouted after me. “Hey…you wanna get everyone together at
Dave’s on Friday? We’ll get the old gang back…have a few drinks…party like we
used to?” she grinned at me as I turned around.

“Sounds great,” I smiled. “Maybe I can actually let loose now that I’m
not training for anything. “

Every time we’d hung out with our friends, I’d always been getting ready
for something. Whether it was a meet or just training in general, I never could
relax. It’s sad for me to admit that I’d never had a beer until after the
accident. Nick had always claimed that he understood, but I could see the look
in his eyes when we were out with our friends and they would be cutting loose,
and I was sipping my water.

“I’ll talk to Nick today, and see what he says. Maybe he can convince
Cam to come too.”

“Sure, but I don’t know about Cam, Logan says something is going on with
him,” Avery got a wistful look on her face.

“I thought you guys were just sleeping together, I didn’t know that
involved conversations like this,” I teased.

“Go to work,” Avery ordered, “before I kick your ass.”

ooooooooo

 
I pulled open the front door, and
began walking toward where my car was parked. As I fumbled with my keys, a low
chuckle rang out.

“You still waiting til the last minute to leave the house I see.”

My head snapped up as I stood there frozen in my spot on the front
steps, “What are you doing here?”