Still Surviving (35 page)

I backed her against car, and she gasped. My fingers braced the flesh of her hips, the wet fabric pushed up to her waist. I lifted her and sat her on the metal surface of the hood. My body between her legs.

“Seth?” She pulled her bottom lip through her teeth as my fingers ran up her cold thighs, her cheeks flushed as I pulled her panties off with a swift tug. “Just like we started then?” She smiled up at me like I was about to give her the world.

I planned to give her more. My wife deserved nothing less.

I leaned in and tasted her lips, her hands loosening my buckle. “Just like we started, Angel.”

THE END

If you are in emotional distress, struggling to cope, and/or are affected by any of the issues covered in this novel, please contact:

https://www.rainn.org

National Sexual Assault Helpline

1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

The Samaritans USA 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

The Samaritans UK 08457 90 90 90

NOW AND FOREVER STILL

A PROLOGUE

Colby

T
HE FOOD WAS TAKING
nine damn years to get to the table, and the loud din of voices started to grate on my nerves. Don’t get me wrong; it was a sideshow watching fucking Seth Montgomery smile more than a goddamn pageant queen. His chick was cool though; Tiffany seemed to be the right fit for him, so who was I to judge.
He got married.
When Todd said we were all meeting up at Rooster’s to celebrate Seth and Tiffany’s marriage, I had to admit, I thought he was messing with me.

Cammie’s hand snaked around my upper thigh, demanding my full attention. The feel of her lips against my ear as she spoke, even after all these years, still got me hard. “Next August, baby, this better be you and me.” She pulled away and gave me a sugary smile.
Fuck.
I was in trouble.

“I promise, sweets.” I leaned in, and her scent was everywhere. Peaches. That smell, no matter if we were fighting or fucking, it made me crazy. My nose trailed along her exposed neckline, and my uneven breath made her smile — this time it was for real. She was wearing my favorite little black dress; it was sleeveless and her full tits were jacking me up. She did this to torture me. “You’ll be my wife… next year… I promise.” My thumb brushed along her jawline, my fingers at the back of her neck, her hair up in a high ponytail, the strawberry blonde waves cascaded down to just between her shoulders. I was such a piece of shit for not claiming this girl sooner.

“So next August?” Sawyer’s deep voice was skeptical; his smile was lopsided and filled with mirth. He knew me too well. Working with him was the best thing I’d ever chosen to do, but this motherfucker was always giving me a hard time.

“Yeah, brother, next August. Be my best man?” I laughed and took a swig of my beer.

“I’d be honored.” Sawyer smirked as Todd rolled his eyes.

“Nice… you guys are dicks.” Todd laughed and shook his head. His girl looked really good tonight. Todd and Lily were finally starting to get some rest. Lyric was sleeping through the night according to Lily, so my brother wasn’t such a shit to be around.

“Well, if it’s okay, Cammie, I’d love to help plan it. When is the exact date?” Elizabeth was always the planner. She was like the matriarch. Her “been there done that attitude” was my favorite thing about her.

“We haven’t decided a date yet, just… August.” Cammie poked at her salad with her fork, and I felt like a complete asshole.

You see, the thing was, I loved this girl. She was perfect; she didn’t take my shit and served up a good dish of her own sass as well. We completed each other. As cheesy as it sounded, this chick was made for me. But… in reality, I was fucking terrified. I watched her go through so many guys before we got together; I’d seen all the shit Todd and Seth had gone through. When Sawyer got hurt, Elizabeth almost shattered. It scared the fuck out of me to depend on another person like that. I’d always just been on my own. Cammie was my first real girl, and I was scared shitless that I could lose her, and being married to her… having her legally be my other half, was something I was looking forward to and dreading at the same time. Because then… it was done, that anticipation was gone, and she lived for that high, that feeling… if it was gone, what would keep her with me?

“What about the thirteenth?” Tiffany’s smile had matched Seth’s all night, and I noticed they only let go of one another’s hand if absolutely necessary. “Thirteen worked for us.”

Seth whispered something in her ear, and her cheeks turned pink. Her long, black lashes fanned down, and Seth’s smile… I knew that smile. That kid was odd, and I could only imagine what he just said to her. His eyes met mine. “August thirteenth could work. It’s about time you set a date, bro.”

I swallowed down the irritation that was Seth Montgomery telling
me
about relationship shit. “What do you think, sweets? August thirteenth?”

Cammie’s blue eyes searched my face, her lips spread slowly into a breathtaking smile. She had my number the day I pinned her to the floor and kissed her. “Really?” Her voice was small. How had I made her wait this long? I didn’t deserve her.

“Really, baby.” Her long delicate fingers rested against her shaking lips, the diamond that sat on her ring finger was a reminder to do the right thing, to make this woman mine already for Christ’s sake. I spoke in a whisper so only she could hear. “I’m sorry I’ve been such a shit.”

She nodded, her eyes filling with tears. “You have been.” Her laugh was watered down, but her smile was everything — it was big, so full of hope — my goddamn heart started to sprint.

I glanced around the table and noticed everyone was lost with their own conversations. Elizabeth and Lily were talking kids. Todd and Sawyer were laughing about something, and Seth and Tiff were privately speaking in murmurs. Foreheads close, eyes on each other, hands… still linked. It was then I realized what a fucking idiot I was. My friends, my family, they were all moving on, doing their own thing, and I was just treading water. “Fuck it, sweets. Let’s get married next month. Let’s do what you wanted to do in the first place.”

“Vegas?” Cammie’s blue eyes were wide, her full, pink bottom lip between her teeth.

I nodded, and she squealed. She actually squealed, and I narrowed my eyes as the table went quiet.

“Did I hear Vegas?” Todd asked giving me a smug smirk.

“Hell yes.” Cammie’s tone was victorious.

“Thank God.” Todd laughed. His remark pissed me off.

“Like you have room to talk. When the fuck are you going to make an honest woman outta of Lily?” I raised my eyebrow, and Todd’s jaw tightened.

“Okay, settle down, Dixon.” Sawyer’s tone begged me to shut the fuck up.

Elizabeth laughed. “Which one, sweetheart?”

“Both of them.” He shook his head with a smartass grin before taking a long pull of his beer.

Lily gave me a scowl. “We’re just fine, thank you very much.” Lily threw her fork at me, and it made a loud clang as it hit the floor. Shit, that girl had terrible aim.

I chuckled. “Holy shit, bro, teach your girl how to throw.”

Todd’s frown twitched as he fought his smile. “That was pretty bad, baby.”

Lily swatted at his chest, and Cammie laughed.

“I love you, sweets.” My hands framed her face, and I brought my lips to hers. The vanilla flavor of her lips mixed with her peach scent made me think of summer days and peach cobbler. Fuck, this girl got me going.

She smiled, her lips still touching mine. “I love you, too…” She pulled away enough to give me a wicked smirk and then leaned forward, speaking quietly in my ear. “…will you show me how a ‘real Dixon man’ does it?” Her hot breath on my neck, her hand at my waist, her thumb dipping dangerously low below my belt. I hissed.

“Don’t temp me, Cammie. You lose this game every time.” My hand skated up her thigh pushing the fabric of her dress higher as my finger slipped under the hem of her panties. I had to bite my cheek to suppress my groan. “Fuck, sweets.” She was wet, and I suddenly couldn’t give a shit if our food ever got here. Hell, I was ready to leave.

“Not today. Today I won.” She nipped my earlobe quickly and pulled away. Cammie took my hand from between her legs and licked my finger — my eyes widened. The rest of the group was oblivious as they argued over which casino would be best. “Hungry, baby?” she asked sweetly as if she hadn’t just done the hottest damn thing.

My nostrils flared. This brazen female — this hot as fuck chick — in one month was going to finally be my wife… what on earth had I been waiting for?

Coming Soon a Forever Still Series Novella

Now and Forever Still

by A.M. JOHNSON

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

A
MANDA
M
ARIE
J
OHNSON
was born and raised in Valrico, Florida. She’s now surrounded by mountains with her husband and three children in Ogden, Utah. She attended Weber State University and graduated with her A.S.N. She is a full-time registered nurse. Reading and writing have always been something she is passionate about. She loves to write about the human experience, love and happily ever afters.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Dear Reader,

This has been an amazing journey. I can’t even begin to explain how grateful I am for each and every one of you! When I started this series, I never thought I’d end up with anyone reading it. Each one of these characters is a small piece of me. Thank you for loving them and giving them life through the talent of media and design.

Thank you to my dear family, you endure so much in my absence. Mr. Johnson… thank you for keeping our fire going. Even on our darkest days, you’re always there.

My friends, I swear I’ll take the hoodie and Harry Potter PJ bottoms off and get dressed now… maybe. But really, thank you so much, especially Elizabeth and Lindsay. Even after all these years, your continued love is felt all these miles away.

My beta readers and best book bitches ever: Beth (I want my vamps); “Gio”vanna, Anna, Lisa, Michelle, Jo, MG, Narine, Lacey, Jellie, Analia (AJ’s Crew Whaaaaat); Teri Renee (Selene’s BFF); Heather and Yvette (Head Cheerleaders); Lucy T.(my own personal hobbit); Lucy C.(Stephen’s Angel); Laurie B.(find me a house two doors down); Maria, Sarah, Sasha, Christy D., Brittany S. (Chase your dreams, write those books); Cynthia, Martha, and last but not least, Cornelia (My life coaches). Mary Ruth, you have a spectacular talent. Thank you for loving my characters and making them more real. You ladies, without our daily chats, encouragements, and friendship I’d be lost. Your talent never ceases to amaze me. Your REAL love for books and authors is why we write. My heart is your heart — love you to the moon and back, with every moment, every second, and every breath, I trust you.

Amy and Kathleen, my dynamic duo! Your edits and comments make me laugh, cry, and build my skill. Thank you. Your friendship means the world.

Nathan and Rachel Van Dyken, thank you for continuing to bet on me!

Tracey-Lee, thank you for holding my hand in the cave and always being there for me. Thank you so much for all you do, and no matter what you say… signed books, swag, and treats for life =)

Kay and Kim, you are my Aussie family and I can’t wait to hug you for reals!

Tiffany Ly, I never can thank you enough. I hope you like your namesake.

A. Mari, I dedicate this book to you… you’re always there for me no matter what, no matter how down, sick, tired, or overworked you are, I know you will answer my call. You help me feel better about the voices in my head and make sure I listen to them full stop. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you do. I’m blessed to have you in my life.

Thank you to Stephen James for inspiring Seth… Best. Muse. Ever.

To all my indie author girls and bloggers!!! Thank you for all the reposts, help, and love!!

I hope I haven’t forgotten anyone, but as always, you know if you’re in my life, I’m grateful for you.

PLAYLIST

“Tear You Apart”
by She Wants Revenge

“Stand by Me”
by Ki: Theory

“Numba 1”
by Kardinal Offishall

“If You Were Here”
by The Cary Brothers

“Maps”
by Yeah Yeah Yeahs

“Passenger”
by Deftones

“Angel”
by Massive Attack

“Head Like A Hole”
by NIN

“The Funeral”
by Band of Horses

“How Come You Don’t Want Me”
by Tegan and Sara

“
All Mixed Up”
by Red House Painters

“White Blank Page”
by Mumford and Sons

“Arsonist’s Lullabye”
by Hozier

“3 Libras”
by A Perfect Circle

“Wicked Game”
by James Vincent McMorrow

“I Need My Girl”
by The National

“Litost”
by X Ambassadors

“Fade Into You”
by Mazzy Star

“Sweet Jane”
by Cowboy Junkies

“Poison”
by Rita Ora

“
The Hollow”
by A Perfect Circle

“Crucify”
by Tori Amos

“Precious Things”
by Tori Amos

“Slow and Steady”
By Of Monsters and Men

“My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark”
by Fall Out Boy

“Last Song”
by Clogs

“99 Problems”
by Hugo