Read The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) Online
Authors: WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
Varro's Servant
Is't not your business too?
Isn't that what you're after too?
CAPHIS
It is: and yours too, Isidore?
It is. You as well, Isisdore's man?
Isidore's Servant
It is so.
That's right.
CAPHIS
Would we were all discharged!
I wish this would all be settled!
Varro's Servant
I fear it.
I have my doubts.
CAPHIS
Here comes the lord.
Here comes the lord.
Enter TIMON, ALCIBIADES, and Lords, & c
TIMON
So soon as dinner's done, we'll forth again,
My Alcibiades. With me? what is your will?
As soon as we've had dinner, we'll go out again,
friend Alcibiades. You want me? What do you want?
CAPHIS
My lord, here is a note of certain dues.
My lord, I have here a note of some debts that are due payment.
TIMON
Dues! Whence are you?
Debts! Where are you from?
CAPHIS
Of Athens here, my lord.
From here in Athens, my lord.
TIMON
Go to my steward.
Go and see my steward.
CAPHIS
Please it your lordship, he hath put me off
To the succession of new days this month:
My master is awaked by great occasion
To call upon his own, and humbly prays you
That with your other noble parts you'll suit
In giving him his right.
If you please, your lordship, he has fobbed me off
from one day to the next this month:
my master has very important business which means
he needs his money, and he humbly requests
that you'll be as noble in this as you are in everything,
and pay him what you owe.
TIMON
Mine honest friend,
I prithee, but repair to me next morning.
My honest friend,
I'll just ask you to come back tomorrow morning.
CAPHIS
Nay, good my lord,--
No, my good lord -
TIMON
Contain thyself, good friend.
Be calm, good friend.
Varro's Servant
One Varro's servant, my good lord,--
I am Varro's servant, my good lord -
Isidore's Servant
From Isidore;
He humbly prays your speedy payment.
I am Isidore's servant;
he humbly requests that you pay him at once.
CAPHIS
If you did know, my lord, my master's wants--
If you only knew, my lord, what my master needs -
Varro's Servant
'Twas due on forfeiture, my lord, six weeks and past.
You were due to pay a forfeit, my lord, more than six weeks ago.
Isidore's Servant
Your steward puts me off, my lord;
And I am sent expressly to your lordship.
Your steward keeps fobbing me off, my lord;
and I have been sent to see your lordship in person.
TIMON
Give me breath.
I do beseech you, good my lords, keep on;
I'll wait upon you instantly.
Give me room to breathe.
I beg you, my good lords, go on;
I'll be with you in a moment.
Exeunt ALCIBIADES and Lords
To FLAVIUS
Come hither: pray you,
How goes the world, that I am thus encounter'd
With clamourous demands of date-broke bonds,
And the detention of long-since-due debts,
Against my honour?
Come here: I ask you,
what have things come to, for me to be attacked
with noisy demands for overdue bonds,
and accusations of unpaid debts,
calling my honour into question?
FLAVIUS
Please you, gentlemen,
The time is unagreeable to this business:
Your importunacy cease till after dinner,
That I may make his lordship understand
Wherefore you are not paid.
If you please, gentlemen,
this isn't a good time for this business:
postpone your demands until after dinner,
so I can help his lordship to understand
why you haven't been paid.
TIMON
Do so, my friends. See them well entertain'd.
Do that, my friends. Make sure they are well fed.
Exit
FLAVIUS
Pray, draw near.
Now, please come with me.
Exit
Enter APEMANTUS and Fool
CAPHIS
Stay, stay, here comes the fool with Apemantus:
let's ha' some sport with 'em.
Wait, wait, here comes the fool with Apemantus:
let's have some fun with them.
Varro's Servant
Hang him, he'll abuse us.
Hang him, he'll abuse us.
Isidore's Servant
A plague upon him, dog!
Curse him, the dog!
Varro's Servant
How dost, fool?
How are you, fool?
APEMANTUS
Dost dialogue with thy shadow?
Are you talking to your shadow?
Varro's Servant
I speak not to thee.
I wasn't talking to you.
APEMANTUS
No,'tis to thyself.
To the Fool
Come away.
No, you were talking to yourself.
[to the Fool]
Come away.
Isidore's Servant
There's the fool hangs on your back already.
There's the fool hanging on your back already.
APEMANTUS
No, thou stand'st single, thou'rt not on him yet.
No, you're standing alone, you're not there yet.
CAPHIS
Where's the fool now?
Where's the fool now?
APEMANTUS
He last asked the question. Poor rogues, and
usurers' men! bawds between gold and want!
He's the one who asked the last question. Poor scoundrels,
moneylenders' men! Pimps between money and need!
All Servants
What are we, Apemantus?
What are we, Apemantus?
APEMANTUS
Asses.
Asses.
All Servants
Why?
Why?
APEMANTUS
That you ask me what you are, and do not know
yourselves. Speak to 'em, fool.
Because you ask me what you are, and don't know
yourselves. Speak to them, fool.
Fool
How do you, gentlemen?
How are you, gentlemen?
All Servants
Gramercies, good fool: how does your mistress?
Well, thanks, good fool; how is your mistress?
Fool
She's e'en setting on water to scald such chickens
as you are. Would we could see you at Corinth!
She's just boiling the water to pluck chickens
like you. If only we could see you in Corinth!
APEMANTUS
Good! gramercy.
Very good! Praise God.
Enter Page
Fool
Look you, here comes my mistress' page.
Look, here comes my mistress' page.
Page
[To the Fool] Why, how now, captain! what do you
in this wise company? How dost thou, Apemantus?
Why, hello there, captain! What are you doing
amongst all these wise people? How are you, Apemantus?
APEMANTUS
Would I had a rod in my mouth, that I might answer
thee profitably.
I wish I had a cane instead of a tongue, to give
you a proper lashing.
Page
Prithee, Apemantus, read me the superscription of
these letters: I know not which is which.
Please, Apemantus, read the addresses on these
letters for me: I don't know which is which.
APEMANTUS
Canst not read?
Can't you read?
Page
No.
No.
APEMANTUS
There will little learning die then, that day thou
art hanged. This is to Lord Timon; this to
Alcibiades. Go; thou wast born a bastard, and thou't
die a bawd.
Not much learning will die then, the day
you're hanged. This one's for Lord Timon; this for
Alcibiades. Go; you were born a bastard, and you'll
die a pimp.
Page
Thou wast whelped a dog, and thou shalt famish a
dog's death. Answer not; I am gone.
You're a son of a bitch, and you'll die as
a starving dog. Don't answer me, I'm gone.
Exit
APEMANTUS
E'en so thou outrunnest grace. Fool, I will go with
you to Lord Timon's.
This is just how you run away from salvation. Fool,
I will go with you to Lord Timon's.
Fool
Will you leave me there?
Are you going to leave me there?
APEMANTUS
If Timon stay at home. You three serve three usurers?
If Timon stays at home. You three work for moneylenders?
All Servants
Ay; would they served us!
Yes, we wish they worked for us!
APEMANTUS
So would I,--as good a trick as ever hangman served thief.
I wish that too - that they'd work the trick on you the hangman
works on the thief.
Fool
Are you three usurers' men?
Are you three moneylenders' men?
All Servants
Ay, fool.
Yes, fool.
Fool
I think no usurer but has a fool to his servant: my
mistress is one, and I am her fool. When men come
to borrow of your masters, they approach sadly, and
go away merry; but they enter my mistress' house