The Heaven I Found In Hell (30 page)

"Why? Is there anything wrong…?"

"Yes," I answered. "I haven't paid for the bag yet."

Wapack! Why the hell did I say that?

"Oh, okay," he said, trying to hide the hurt look on his face. "I can pay for it."

And then suddenly…an evil thought came to my head…

"Okay. It's eight hundred dollars," I said secretly smirking.

He took the bag, headed over to the cashier, as I followed suit. I saw him take out his wallet, before he revealed a few hundred-dollar bills. I didn't know what kind of alien thing came to me, and suddenly smacked me in the head that I decided to want to give him a hard time. This was how I was like before…but I knew I had changed, because of the guy paying for my bag.

"Here you go," he said handing me my new purchase.

I smiled, looked at him intently, before I closed the space between us and hugged him. The embrace was quick, but during our few seconds of closeness, I felt his chest tense up, and that made me happy. I would have never expected Nathan to get all nervous because of a girl, and my kind for that matter, so I was glad when I felt him do that.

God, I feel mean…

"Thanks," I said, willingly taking the bag.

"No problem…so where to now?" he asked. "Oh…do you mind if we pass by Armani first? I found this cool jacket the other day…so yeah."

"Sure, come on."

We left Coach and headed over to one of my top five stores. I didn't know why, but I really liked the designs of Armani. They were chic, but still, anyone could wear them. We entered the shop, and started looking at random pants, tops, etc, and after a few minutes, Nathan decided to buy the leather jacket. After doing so, we left the shop, and walked around again. We headed over to The Cheesecake Factory to have an early dinner, and even though my mind didn't like the idea of being served in large amounts, my stomach couldn't wait. I had tasted their cheesecake once, and it was to die for.

"I don't think I have room for any more food," I said to Nathan the moment I finished the pasta I had shared with him.

I really loved The Cheesecake Factory even though everything there was ginormous. Their servings were like…whoa…okay…I better stop before I start ranting on and on about how this restaurant was supposedly the best one I've ever been to. And so I shall talk about Nathan and me, and the dinner we had together.

I ordered a simple pasta, while he, sharing it with me, still got steak. The guy finished it, and it didn't even hurt his superb physique one bit! He still looked good, even though he took in probably a million calories, while I, on the other hand, tried to maintain my size two body very carefully. Before I could think about him and his body, and me and my growing bone structure, the song 'Collide' played throughout the whole restaurant, so I sang along. I super, really, definitely loved this song. It was so, so sweet.

I started singing out loud, but not in a way that would embarrass me, and when I noticed Nathan looking at me weirdly, I told him to join along. His raised eyebrow went even higher, as he shook his head.

"No way…!"

"Aw…come on, dear!" I said, using my favorite nickname of his. "Join!"

He kept saying 'no' while I continued forcing him. I was even shaking his arms already, so that he'd get annoyed, and end up singing, but no. He stayed true to himself, and remained as hard as a rock. Finally, after a few light-years had passed, he finally agreed, and started to open his mouth. I soon realized why he gave me that awkward look. It wasn't because of me. It was because of him. He sucked at singing for real, and this sudden realization made me see him as someone human. He had his defects, and learning about it made me feel good about myself. Ha-ha.

"Okay…stop," I said, holding my hand up in front of my face.

I wasn't trying to offend him. I was just trying to save him! If people heard him 'recite,' they would probably throw their cheesecakes at him. I shook my head. God, I was really bad.

"I told you so," he said, looking slightly hurt, "You were pestering me to sing!"

I looked at him, and suddenly began to pout. I didn't know he was that sensitive. It was his fault anyway! He had been acting tough all along. How did he expect me to react? He was always acting conceited, that sometimes…Gaaah! I didn't want to think about my feelings anymore. It was stressing me out.

"I'm sorry…" I said, not knowing what else to say.

He nodded, and then, "Did I really suck that much…?"

Should I tell him the truth?

As they say, Honesty is the best policy.

"Uhm…" I started, trying to think of a good answer. "…just stick to soccer."

His lips curved up into a grin, as he reached his arm out, so that he could slap my shoulder. I took my vengeance by messing up his already tousled hair, before the both of us decided to settle down, and act like the mature seventeen-year olds we were. Ordering our cheesecakes, we told the waitress what we wanted, and before she left, she gave us a smile, and told us that we'd get our desserts soon.

"Dylan seems like a good guy," Nathan spoke out loud, taking me by surprise.

That came out of nowhere.

"Yeah, he really is," I answered him, my voice sounding unsure.

In response, he simply smiled, and for my part, I grinned back. I didn't know why the topic of my ex started to cross his mind, but I thought it better if it never did. Our surroundings suddenly felt awkward, and I had no idea what I was supposed to do, so he decided to break it.

"That was random." He said, stifling a laugh.

I nodded, smirked, and told him I so agreed with what he said. After a few minutes of exchanging grins and laughs, we became still once more, so it was my turn to break the ice.

"Just say what you want to say." I said, taking from his unsure expression that he was thinking about something deeply ever since we got to the mall.

He talked definitely, but unlike before, he seemed so unsure of his actions and words. It was as if he was being cautious, like he was afraid if something happened, and this I must say was so not like the Nathan I knew.

"I already did."

I cocked my eyebrows up at him. 
Was that all he was going to say?

"I already told you I liked you."

Nobody told me you'd feel so good

Nobody said you'd be so beautiful

Nobody warned me about your smile…

Can I say perfect timing? I stopped to think, and came to the generalization that the world was trying to tell me something. Was the earth siding with Nathan? No way…

Before I could say something to him, the cakes arrived, and with them came a sigh of relief. I was saved…again, but I honestly didn't know what the right thing to do was anymore. I liked him. That was clear. But should I tell him? A million reasons came to my head as to why Nathan and I together wasn't such a good idea.

First, my career. If ever we start going out, the whole world would know about it, and won't stop until they catch on camera every single teeny-weeny detail of our relationship, and find a scandal somewhere in it. Second, my parents. I wanted them to think that I was studying my ass off in this boarding school, so that I could go back to what I normally did, which was modeling, but if they find out about Nathan and me (if ever), they're probably going to think that I'm not taking them seriously, and might end up giving me some harsher punishment. Third, my reputation. If ever we became a couple, I'd probably end up loving him more, and Alexandra Levi doesn't do love. She breaks hearts. I swear…I sounded like a bitch.

And a million other 'if ever's' you guys don't want to hear immediately filled up my brain…

"I swear. Their cheesecake is the best." Nathan said, as he stopped eyeing me, and instead, turned his attention to the dessert covered with strawberries and syrup.

I started eating my own cake, and as I did, I thought about the things that could happen if ever I told him, or if I didn't. 
Gosh…
why is my self-control extremely high right now? That's not how it's supposed to be!

"Here, taste." He said, as he held up his fork in front of my mouth.

The moment I opened my mouth to answer, he shoved the wonderful creation I called dessert down my throat, as I savored its flavor, making the most of my sense of taste. I swallowed it, and then took a drink of my water, before I hit Nathan's hand which was just lazily resting on the table.

"You just put your fork inside my mouth! I was supposed to say something!" I said acting a little bit exaggerated.

"I wanted you to taste my cake…?" he answered, but the way he said it, he sounded like he was asking something rather than saying it.

"Are you just trying to find a way to talk to me or something?" I asked with a tone of voice that made me sound arrogant or snobbish.

"Maybe," he started, with a small grin. "I just wanted to get closer to you."

I had to smile when he said that, and Lord please help me…my sanity was going insane! I was practically exposing my blushing self to the whole world in a full restaurant with the reason of my cheek coloration just in front of me! And that was not the worst yet…my answer…

"Well instead of shoving the fork into my mouth, it could've been your tongue."

Crap.

My answer was total…crap.

Nathan couldn't help himself, and instead of the usual apathetic, cool, and collected aura I usually felt from him, he started to literally laugh his ass off, and make fun of my answer. He tried to cover his mouth with his hands, but it was just plain useless. Even if a few seconds had already passed, his laughter still didn't die down, and I was forced to make him shut up.

"Nate, you're making yourself look like a fool!" I told him. "Shut the hell up!"

He hugged his stomach tightly, and finally he quieted down. Before he could talk to me (without laughing again), he took a bite, and finished his Tres Leches. I, too, followed suit, and soon after, we called for our server to hand us the check.

"I never knew you had a dirty mind," he said, wearing a look of contemplation.

I was about to object, but he cut me. "Oh wait…you have one…how could've I forgotten that?"

I hit him for the millionth time since we had hung out together, before I got the check our waitress handed to me. I looked at the price, and started to retrieve my wallet from my bag, but Nathan held his hand out, and told me that I was, in no way, paying for the dinner.