The Playmaker (A Big Play Novel Book 1) (14 page)

#27:

Taste Bomb

Tori

Colt’s avoiding me.

My kissing obviously wasn’t as great as he said it was…or maybe the nervous energy I’m expelling at the thought of telling him the truth is so strong, it’s working like some kind of repulsion device. Waves of it have been flowing out of me since Tuesday night. Well, it’s now Thursday afternoon, and I need to do something or I’m going to lose my mind.

Gripping my folder, I remind myself to keep breathing as I approach Colt’s locker. I’m not going to do it here. Even though the hallway is basically empty, if anyone happened to pass by and hear me, I’d seriously die. Besides, when he rejects me, I need to be somewhere private so he can walk away and I can be left to cry tears and eat chocolate in solitude. I have three bars of Forrester’s in my bag…just in case.

Swallowing down the boulder in my throat, I stop beside Colt’s open locker and clear my throat.

His head peeks out from behind the metal, his blue eyes popping wide when he sees me.

“Oh, hey.”

“Hi, um… Hey.” I wave my fingers at him.

His eyes light with a smile, but then he blinks and the warmth in his gaze is replaced with a cool look of indifference.

I power through with the speech I formulated last period.

“I was just wondering if you wanted me to read over your final assignment before we hand it in tomorrow.”

Okay, so it’s not really a speech. More like a rapidly spoken suggestion.

“Uh…yeah. Okay. That’d be great.”

“Cool.” I grin.

He pulls it out of his locker and holds it out for me.

I look over my shoulder and then back at him before taking it with a shaky smile. “Actually, I was wondering if we could do this at your place or…I mean, you’re welcome to come to mine, but… Maybe a desk would be good, or a table…or, I mean, I could just do it here.”

His blank gaze is giving me nothing, and my nervous babble is kicking in big time. I press my lips together and force my eyes to the front page of his assignment, blinking to clear my vision. The letters keep blurring and I swear, if I start crying right now, I’m going to consider homeschooling.

“Are you hungry?” Colt’s question makes my head pop up.

I must be pulling a weird face because he snickers and glances at the floor.

“There’s a great ice cream parlor at the North Point mall.”

“Oh, you mean Taste Bomb? I love that place.”

“Well, let’s go there.”

“Really? Sounds great.” I laugh out the words because I’m so damn excited. This is like a date! Almost. I mean, it’s a reading-an-assignment, confessing-the-truth, harrowing kind of date, but still. It’s the closest I’m gonna get, so I’ll take it.

I clutch the assignment and follow him out to his truck. Everyone’s either at some kind of practice or has already split, so we make it to the parking lot without too many curious glances. I can tell Colt’s aware by the tense set of his muscles and the quick way he accelerates out of the school lot.

Taste Bomb is at a mall on the other side of town, close to Brownridge. Nelson High students tend to go there on the weekends, but it’s a little far out for a quick, after-school trip. I’ve heard that Layla and her girls play hooky all the time so they can go shopping there. I wonder what that must be like. I’ve never taken risks like that before. It sounds kind of exciting, but I’m sure I’d never have the courage to actually go through with it.

Colt parks underground and we take the elevator up to the third floor. Taste Bomb is near the movie theater and down the end of a row of shops, all filled with expensive clothes and shoes my mother would never dream of buying. She tends to make most of my clothes, so I haven’t gone shopping much…although I did blow most of my waitressing earnings on some new clothes for senior year.

I run my hands down my tight jeans and take a seat in the booth near the window. The waitress comes straight over and hands us two menus. I look through it, but already know I’ll be getting the Raspberry Ripple Delight with white chocolate sprinkles and mixed berry topping.

The waitress comes back after a few minutes and Colt lets me order before placing his. “I’ll have the Fudge Deluxe with extra sauce and a glass of water, too, please.” She takes the menus with a smile and he looks at me. “You don’t drink soda?”

“Yeah, sometimes.” I shrug. “I just figure water’s better for me…and it’s free.” I grin. “I’m a cheap date. Not that this is a date.” My cheeks flare with heat. “Can I have a look at that assignment?”

I keep my eyes on the table and hold out my hand. Colt mercifully lets my comment slide and hands over his hard work. I get straight into it, reading it carefully and grinning from ear to ear.

“This is fantastic.”

His eyes spark with uncertainty.

“No, seriously, Colt. This is really good. I like the part you’ve added in the second section. I didn’t even think of that.”

“Thanks. That just came to me when I was typing it up.” He shrugged, starting to look just a little proud.

I slap the assignment down and tip my head at him. “Go on, let it show. You’re allowed to be proud. This is amazing!”

His grin grows to full beam, making him look like a little kid for a second. “I wouldn’t have been able to do it without you.”

I brush the air with my hand.

“No, seriously. I…I mean, I know this is only one assignment and I’ve still got a hell of a lot more work to do, but that list you printed for me, what you said… It was really inspiring. I’m going to do this. I have to do this.” His voice dips low and has a raw edge to it when he speaks.

“I know,” I whisper at him. “I know how important football is to you. Your passion oozes out of this paper.” I tap the assignment, then slide it back over to him. “You’re so lucky.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you know what you want. Your future is so clear and set.”

“Not that clear. I’m chasing a dream my parents don’t agree with. I had to drive myself to that football camp at Boise State this summer. I worked my ass off and when I got home, they treated it like I’d been at some lame-ass summer camp where you do canoeing and archery for fun.” He shakes his head. “When I got the call from the coach saying they were going to watch me closely this season and possibly offer me a spot on the Broncos, Mom said, ‘Well, we’ll see.’” His snicker is dry and brittle. “Dad keeps pushing the other side of it, warning me how football can’t be my only option for the future. I know he’s right. I’m not stupid. But man, I’d love to hear them say they were proud…or tell me to go chase my dreams.”

“I get it. That must suck. Thankfully, my parents are not like that, but at least you have a dream to chase. I have no idea what I want to do.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I mean, I
really
don’t. I’ve applied to Idaho State, because that’s what I’m supposed to do, but I don’t know what courses to pick, or what I want to study. How do you decide? So many things interest me and I’m not particularly good at any one thing.”

“You’re good at plenty. You’re really smart.”

I take his compliment with a smile, but still can’t help shaking my head. “There’s no point being smart if you don’t even know what you want to do with your life. You’re so focused. You have this goal and you know what you have to do to achieve it.” I slice my hand through the air. “It’s set, it’s easy… I mean, it’s not
easy
. I know it’s very hard, but at least you have drive…and passion.”

“You’ll find yours. There’ll come this moment when your eyes pop wide open and you’ll feel it.” He points to his chest, his eyes sparkling like sapphires. “The first time I ran down the field with a football clutched to my body, I knew it was what I was meant to be doing.” Colt’s shoulder hitches. “The heart knows what it wants.”

Our eyes meet across the table and the air around us starts buzzing with an electricity that’s just a little familiar. His eyes dart to my lips and I’m tempted to lean across the table, but then the waitress appears with our ice cream.

“Here you go.” She sets them down and looks between us. “Do you need anything else?”

“No, we’re good. Thanks.” Colt smiles at her and I can’t help noticing the way her cheeks tinge a slight pink.

Of course they would. He’s gorgeous.

And sweet.

And inspiring.

No wonder I love him so much.

I’ve got to tell him.

I pick up my teaspoon and start fiddling with the long handle, spinning it between my fingers. The ice cream smells so good and the red, sticky topping is beckoning me to taste, but I refuse to take one nibble until I’ve told him the truth. “Hey, so… Colt, I…”

“You know what you should become?” He takes a mouthful of ice cream and grins at me. “A teacher. You were so amazing working with me. You’ve got a way of explaining things without making me feel stupid. Out of all the tutors I’ve suffered with over my lifetime, you have by far been the best.” His eyes dart to his sundae, a half-smile pushing his cheek to the side. “In fact, I was going to ask you if you wanted to help me out a little more this year…you know, when other assignments pop up. Heck, you should apply to Boise State and I could have a permanent tutor to get me through college.” A wink lightens his words, but my heart is racing so hard and fast right now I can’t even reply.

He wants me to apply to Boise State so I can tutor him? What does that mean? Is he just being nice, or is he saying he’d like to spend the next four years hanging out with me?

My mouth drops open and my lips crest into a smile.

“Oh, shit.” Colt’s short words kill my buzz, especially when he slumps down in his seat. “Get down.”

I follow his quick order, wondering who he saw coming in to make him react this way.

“Who is it?”

Colt winces. “It’s Layla and her little posse.”

“Well, don’t you know them? You should go say hi.”

“I don’t want them seeing us together. They’ll think we’re on a date or something.”

I look down, glad my hair is free so I can hide my sad frown behind it. “What do you want to do?”

“Maybe we should split before they see us.”

I peek through my curtain of hair to see him grimace at me.

“I’m sorry. Do you mind? I think it’ll be easier. We don’t want people getting the wrong idea, and if anyone can spread a rumor through our school, it’s them.”

“Sure. Whatever. That’s cool.” My voice is soft and unconvincing, but he doesn’t seem to notice. Wrestling some cash out of his pocket, he dumps the bills in the middle of our table and shuffles out of the booth. His eyes dart across the room. I follow his gaze and see the girls taking their seats, flicking their long, glossy hair over their shoulders and smoothing down their petite dresses. They look like they belong on the set of
Mean Girls
, and it makes me realize all over again that I have no place in their world.

Colt hustles us into the clear and slows down to an amble once we’re past the hair salon. My eyes rove the store windows. I’m doing everything in my power to avoid Colt’s gaze. How can I tell him the truth now? The thought of being seen with me is obviously too embarrassing for him to contemplate. If by some miracle he actually likes me, we probably can’t work anyway. He’s not interested in dating Tori Lomax. He wants a Layla Mahoney or Roxanne Carmichael.

He wants a girl who he’ll proudly kiss in public because she’s perfect and beautiful. He’ll hold her hand and claim her as his own. My throat swells thicker and thicker with each passing thought, until my eyes land on a little black dress in a storefront window. It’s not really my style, but it makes me think of Layla and Roxy.

So, I’m trying it on.

Maybe if Colt sees me in something really outrageous he’ll know how far I’m willing to go for him. I can be like those girls if he needs me to be. I shouldn’t be telling him the truth over ice cream. I should be telling him the truth at a senior party, dressed like the girls he usually hangs out with while drinking beer and fully entering his world.

“Hey, do you mind if I look in this store for a sec?”

Colt glances over my head and looks like he’d rather eat razor blades.

“You don’t have to wait,” I tell him. “I can catch the bus home.”

“No.” His eyes round at my suggestion. “Of course I can wait. Go for it. I’ll just hang out here.”

“Thanks.” I force a cheery smile and waltz into the shop, pretending like I’ve done this a million times before. Amy would roll her eyes at me and tell me not to be stupid, but maybe it’s not a bad thing for me to step out of the safety of my world. It’s good to experience new things. Heck, maybe by doing all this I’ll really find myself and discover my true passion, the way Colt has.

I hustle over to the rack and start flipping through the dresses until I find the one in my size. It looks smaller than it did in the window. I swallow down my doubts and head to the change rooms anyway. I’ve been stepping out of my comfort zone left and right to pull off
Operation Fall for Tori
; this is just another rung in the ladder.