The Price of Freedom (20 page)

Richard immediately leaned over
her in concern and asked: “What’s the matter?  Did I hurt you?” She shook
her head.  “Then what’s wrong?”

“This is wrong! I’m with you in
exchange for my freedom and you only bought me because you desired my body.
Oh..,” she gasped in horror as she suddenly remembered something, “I even
forgot that you have a fiancée in Carolina.”  To tell the truth Richard
had forgotten as well.

“What of it?  It felt right
and we both enjoyed it.”  Deborah could not deny that it felt right but
feeling right didn’t make it right. And she would never have been in his bed if
he had not promised her freedom.  Then again, after tonight, maybe that
was no longer true.  She now understood what Hattie meant.  He had
been so patient and gentle with her that the ice around her heart that had
begun to melt the day he rescued her was now just about gone and that scared
her more than a whipping.  He was leaving in two months.

“You think too much,” he
complained pulling her back against him. The warmth of his embrace and the
languor of her body made her begin to feel sleepy in spite of her restless
thoughts and her eyes began to close.

“Shouldn’t I go back to my room?”
she murmured sleepily.

“No.  Stay where you
are.  I will enjoy sleeping with you in my arms.”  His last thought
before he fell asleep was that she felt entirely too right in his arms.

The sun in her face woke Deborah
or she would probably have slept until noon.  Stretching contentedly she
wondered why she was on a soft mattress and why her body felt so relaxed.
Images of Hattie coming into the kitchen weeks ago stretching contentedly came
back to her and she suddenly remembered the source of that contentment. 
Richard!  Shame shocked her into wakefulness.  She was no better than
Hattie.

“Good morning,” greeted Richard.
Deborah’s head swung around to find him lying on his side watching her.

In the light of day Deborah was
mortified and pulled the sheet up to cover herself as she remembered their time
together.

“Too late for modesty now,” teased
Richard earning him a glare.

“I shouldn’t be here.  Why
didn’t you wake me up?”

“Have you got something to
do? 
Somewhere to go?
  You forget that your
job is to serve me now.”

“How could I forget?” she asked
sarcastically. “I hope I served you well.”

“Oh, you definitely did. 
You’re worth every pound I paid for you,” provoked Richard.  Deborah
raised her hand to slap his face but he caught it before it found its mark.

“Now I promised that I wouldn’t
hit you but I should have made you promise the same, you little minx. Does this
mean that the honeymoon is over?” he teased.

“This isn’t funny Richard. This is
not a honeymoon. I have sold my body for freedom.  This is something I
always said I would never do,” she agonized.

“Well if that is the case, I paid
£20 for your services, something I always said I would never do, and do you see
me agonizing about it?”  As if to prove his point he bent to kiss a
ticklish spot on her neck. “And it’s Master Richard to you.” He couldn’t help
adding.

“You are so infuriating!” she
scolded shoving him off and escaping from the bed.

“Well if you’re getting up, go and
get me some breakfast and bring it back to bed.  I am famished woman, and
I need to regain my strength.”

Deborah picked up a pillow that
had somehow gotten pushed off the bed during the night and threw it at
him.  He caught it easily and put it behind his head while he sat up to
watch her get dressed with a satisfied smile. He was right; he could not have
bought anything with the £20 that would have given his as much pleasure as
Deborah.

Since it was Sunday only some of
the girls were working in the house. For that Deborah was grateful since she
didn’t feel up to facing their knowing looks.  She returned to her room,
had a quick wash with a bowl of water she found there and changed into her
everyday clothes before heading to the kitchen.

The family had already left for
church and Cassie, her mother and the
cook were
sitting down to eat some porridge. She was relieved that Hattie was not there.

“Good morning,” Deborah greeted
hesitantly.

“Morning?
 
It’s nearly noon girl,” teased Cassie.  Sarah smiled and continued eating
her porridge without commenting.

Deborah blushed and told the cook,
“Master Richard would like his breakfast now.  I’m to take it to him.”

“All right, just now
I
goin
’
fry some bacon and eggs
for him.  Sit down and eat some porridge.”

“Thank you.  I am starving!”

“Master Richard
didn
’ feed you last night?”  Cassie asked just to get
a reaction from Deborah. “It’s a good thing Hattie not working today because
she
ain
’ too happy with you.”

That was too bad for Hattie. She’d
had the pleasure of Richard’s attention for a month and Deborah could even
understand her anger, but her freedom was at stake so Hattie would have to get
over it.

As the smell of frying bacon and
eggs filled the kitchen, Deborah got up to fix Richard some tea to go with it.
Her mouth watered at the scent of the cooking meat and wondered if he would
offer to share it with her.  The cook had been more than generous with her
portions. 

Holding the tray with his
breakfast in both hands she headed up the stairs and to his room at the end of
the corridor.  She balanced the tray in one hand while she knocked and
waited for him to invite her in.

Richard opened the door again,
this time clad only in a pair of tight breeches which left little to the
imagination. He took the tray from her and walked over to the desk and put it
down. Deborah’s eyes trailed after him in secret admiration.

“Something smells good,” he
remarked lifting the cover off the plate. “Surely the cook doesn’t expect me to
eat all this. Come and have some.” Deborah hesitated and then checked
herself.  The slave mentality was so engraved in her that she felt she
should not eat with him. It was funny how slaves could share their master’s bed
but not their table.

Richard pulled her to sit on him
and fed her pieces of bacon.  The smoked salty meat was delicious. 
She couldn’t remember the last time she tasted bacon; probably when she used to
practically live with the girls or on the rare occasions that the cook would
let them have the tiny burnt bits that were left over after she made the
family’s breakfast.

How she had risen in status, she
scoffed at herself; having the luxury of two days off, sleeping past dawn and
now eating bacon and eggs with her master. She could easily get used to this
life. What had happened to the days when she scorned status and said she
preferred freedom? She reminded herself that the privileges were only for two
months, and that was assuming that Richard did not tire of her before then;
after all Hattie had not lasted more than a month.

Harvest was well on the way so
every hand was put to work.  Richard had another hard day of working in
the fields but, unlike the slaves, he could stop cutting when he got tired and
move on to another task like loading the canes which was a lot easier.

He groaned as he stretched his
back after picking up another load and putting it on the cart. The only thing
he would do tonight when he got into his bed was sleep.  At this rate he
wouldn’t have the energy to call for Deborah very much in the next two months.
He knew that he didn’t really have to work so hard but he wanted to earn his
keep since his uncle had refused to take any money from him, except of course
the £20 for Deborah.

He was glad that the end of the
day was drawing to a close and that he could soon head back to the house.

As the family sat down to dinner a
few hours later, his aunt handed him a letter that had been delivered that day.

“It must be from your fiancée,”
she said with a pleased look. He almost thought she seemed happy to remind him that
he was betrothed, especially since she so heartily disapproved of his liaison
with Deborah.

 The last thing he wanted was
a letter from Ann to remind him of his responsibilities in Carolina and he
almost groaned when he saw it but he put the letter next to his plate and said,
"Thank you, Aunt Elizabeth. I will read it later."

Deborah and Cassie brought in
their meal and he couldn't help his eyes following her as she crossed the room
and put out the food. Vivid images of her in his arms flashed before him making
him distinctly uncomfortable in his chair and the letter beside his plate added
to his discomfort in other ways. He looked away from her and caught his uncle’s
amused look.

“The harvest is progressing nicely
and we should be finishing about the time you’re ready to leave, Richard. At
least there have been no more incidents of anyone getting caught in the grinder
and the new boy seems to have settled in well.”

“Good.  I know you need all
hands on deck but was wondering if I could go into Town tomorrow,” Richard
asked.

“Of course, my
boy.
  You don’t need my permission, but you may have to drive
yourself there because I can’t spare anyone.  Do you think you can find
your way?”

“I will take Deborah with
me.  I’m sure she can make sure that I don’t get lost.”

“Do you have business in Town?”
His aunt asked curiously.

Richard hesitated, not really
wanting to tell her that he was taking Deborah to buy some clothes to replace
the drab skirts and blouses that she wore. He couldn’t even explain it to
himself but he wanted to give her something that would please her.

“Yes.  I need to meet with
our agent here and I really should send some letters home.”  Yes, it was
long past the time he should have written to Ann.

Richard was too tired to even
share a drink with his uncle in his office.  Instead he made his excuses
and headed to his room where he stripped off his clothes, put on a comfortable
robe and sat up in bed to read the letter.  He broke the seal with
reluctance, for some reason not wanting news of what was happening in Carolina
or in Ann’s life.

April 5, 1696

Carlisle Hall,

James Island, Carolina

Dearest Richard

I can’t believe that you have
been gone for only five weeks because it has felt like five months.  The
days drag by and my thoughts are constantly with you, wondering how you are
doing and if you are enjoying Barbados.

I’m certainly enjoying Barbados
very much, Richard thought as an image of Deborah came to his mind.  But
I’m sure that’s not what you mean.

My only relief from missing you
is to attend an occasional party but even then I miss your presence and I am
reminded of that time on the terrace at the Berkeley’s party which does not
help. Charles has been kind enough to escort me if my parents are not
attending. I have been spending quite a lot of time with your mother and
Charlotte and I was very worried when I heard that you had been ill.  I hope
you have fully recovered your strength.

My father is eager for you to
come back with all the things you have learned so that you can begin to make
the changes you and he have spoken about.  You know that business is not
of interest to me but I’m sure that you will be successful at whatever you are
planning to do.

I hope you have not met and
fallen in love with any beautiful Barbadian women who will try to convince you
to stay because I miss you terribly and can’t wait for you to come back so that
we can start our life together.

All my love

Ann

PS Looking forward to receiving
a letter from you soon although I know how you hate to write. A brief note will
suffice.

Richard sighed.  He would
write to Ann early in the morning and mail it when he went into town, although
to be truthful his mind was not to it.  As for her concerns about him
falling in love with a Barbadian woman, she had no worries there, although he
had to admit that a certain beautiful slave girl was occupying his every
thought.  However one did not fall in love with slaves.  As soon as
he had his fill of her, he was sure that she would not possess his thoughts as
she did now.